Able 2014. # Vacation, all I ever wanted. # Vacation, had to get away. # Vacation, meant to be spent alone. # Can't seem to get my mind off of you. # Yeah, yeah, yeah. # Back here at home, there's nothing to do. # Hey, yeah, yeah. Now that I'm away, # I wish I'd stayed. # Tomorrow's a day of mine # that you won't be in. # Oh, oh, oh, oh. # Vacation, all I ever wanted. # Vacation, had to get away. Guys. One... # spent alone... (music stops) ALL: Aw. Where's Alvin? ALVIN: Hey, Dave! (whooping) Where you been? Where have I been? Trying to board the ship. Ah, already done that. Also, checked out our room, dibbed the side of the bed closest to the window, ordered us a round of virgin pina coladas and... signed us up for parasailing. Alvin, you're too young for parasailing. I thought we were going on vacation to have fun. Look, don't worry, family vacations are all about fun. But first, we're going to need to set some rules. Let's start with: you can't call dibs on a bed until everyone's in the room. Good rule. Yeah! That's right! That's a good one, Simon. All right, so that's our first rule. Should we go over the rest of them? Dave, come on. Rules is my middle name. (foghorn droning) # No attorneys to plead my case # No rocket ships to send me into outer space # And my fingers are bejeweled # With diamonds and gold # But that ain't gonna help me now, oh # I'm trouble # Yeah, trouble now # I'm trouble, y'all # I got trouble in my town # I'm trouble, yeah, trouble now... Hey, Dave. (Alvin laughs, whoops) (grunts and groans) This is your captain speaking. All kids are now allowed to play on the adultsonly Serenity Deck. # Oh, discover, oh, yeah # Yeah, trouble now # Trouble, trouble, trouble # I got trouble in my town... (feedback screeches) (grunting) Whoohoo! # You think you're right # But you were wrong # You tried to take me, baby, but you knew all along # You can't take me for a ride # I'm not a fool now, so you better run and hide # I'm trouble # Yeah, trouble now # I'm trouble, y'all # I got trouble in my town # I'm trouble # Yeah, trouble now # I'm trouble, y'all, I got trouble in my town # Yeah, I'm trouble # Yeah, trouble now # I'm trouble, y'all # I got trouble in my town # I'm trouble # Yeah, trouble now, I'm trouble, y'all # I got trouble in my town # Yo! I'm the T to the R to the OUbull # Rock it nonstop till the mic gets dull # Take what I want when I want, no holding back # When I kick a flow I'm all up on the track # A to the L to the VIN, when I'm in town # Me and all of my friends # Gonna come through like a hurricane # Tearing down everything in my way... (music stops, feedback screeches) Alvin! We talked about setting rules, Alvin. I'm sorry. I didn't know the agreement meant no fun. You're allowed to have fun. It's... when are you going to stop acting like a child? When are you going to stop treating me like a child? I'll stop treating you like a child when you start acting like a grownup. I'll start acting like a grownup when you start... CHIPETTES: # I whip my tail back and forth # I whip my tail back and forth # I whip my tail back and forth # I whip my tail back and forth (Alvin beatboxing) # I whip my tail back and forth, I whip my tail Back and forth, I whip... Okay, girls, not now, please, okay? Aw. ALVIN: Lame! SIMON: Sorry, Dave. THEODORE: Sorry. (gasps) We're having dinner with the captain? No, I am. You're staying here. I have to go apologize for everything Alvin did. This is so not fair not to us, not to Dave, and certainly not to the captain, who I'm sure was really looking forward to dining with me. Why don't I go speak with Dave, see if I can smooth things over? (grunts) SIMON: Knock knock. What is it, Simon? Well, I would never say this to Alvin. Goodness knows he can be totally irresponsible, but I actually have a suggestion. You have a suggestion for me? He's been driving me crazy a lot longer than he's been driving you crazy. All right, so what is it? Imagine Alvin is a spirited racehorse. That's your advice? No, no, no. I'm not done yet, Dave. All right, so Alvin's a racehorse. And you, Dave, are his incredibly helpful jockey, who's there to guide him down the racetrack of life. But if you hold the reins too tight, that racehorse is going to fight and buck, which is no fun for anyone. But if you loosen the reins just a little... He'll fly right off the track and crash into the fence. I know you want to protect Alvin, but, Dave, sometimes kids will rise to the occasion if you just show them a little trust. All right, guys, room service is on its way. Lights out by 9:00. Um, Dave, question. If we're going to be held captive in this room... Because of Alvin... Can we at least watch a movie? All right. Let's see what's on. You know what? Why don't you guys pick a movie? You're old enough to make your own decision. For real, Dave? Absolutely. Ooh. Dave looks so elegant. Have fun! Wait! Dave, before you go, I made something for you. Wow, it... it's really, um... It's soft, so you can sleep in it, and I made it with all the colors, so it will go with everything. Great. I'll put it on after dinner. You could put it on now, so everyone at the captain's table could see it. ALVIN (laughs): Nice. A real chick magnet. All right, guys, have fun. But not too much fun, because I'm still very upset. Goodbye, Dave. And hello, ladies. I like my tail shaken, not stirred. Where are you going? To the casino. I'm feeling lucky. Oh, no. No, no, no, no. Dave said... Dave said, and I quote... (clears throat) we're old enough to make our own decisions. He meant we were old enough to choose a film. Well, we're clearly not. Check out what Theodore just picked. # La la la, la la la # La la la la... What's wrong with this movie? It's for babies! Which is probably why Dave treats us like babies. Munk up, Theodore. There. That's more like it. (growling) (screaming) Alvin, please! I say we go to Salsa Night. In our pajamas? Oh, I know! # Party rock is in the house tonight # Everybody, just have a good time # And we gonna make you lose your mind # We just want to see you # Shake that (whooping) Alvin! (bell ringing, siren whooping) Alvin! Alvin! (whooping) (cheering) And we have a winner. # Party rock is in the house tonight... Ellie, I love these dresses! You're so crafty. (giggles) Thanks. It's what I do. (grunts) Ooh. Oh, sorry. Ew. What are you? (music stops) (Brittany chuckling) We are the Chipettes. Hi. I'm Eleanor. Um, my sister was just trying to apologize. What's she sorry for? Stepping on my friend's foot? Or her busted, tired, little dance moves? (crowd oohing) Oh, no, you didn't. Oh, yes, she did. You better get those Lee Press-Ons out of my face unless you want to meet my claws. And yeah, baby, they're real. (all hissing) (crowd aahing and chuckling) You want to go? ALL: Hit it! (Latin dance music plays) (cheering) # Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga # I know you can't control yourself any longer # Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga # I know you can't control yourself any longer (singing in Spanish) # Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga (singing in Spanish) # Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga (Brittany screaming) # Everybody # Gather round now # Let your body feel the heat # Don't you worry if you can't dance # Let the music move your feet # Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga # I know you can't control yourself any longer # Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga # I know you can't control yourself any longer # Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga # I know you can't control yourself any longer # Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga # I know you can't control yourself any longer. (cheering and applause) DAVE: Captain, I'm really sorry about what happened. Alvin, he's a kid. He's just trying to have some fun. There's nothing wrong with fun. Our pelican makes sure that everybody on the ship has fun. In fact, in port, he circles the ship on a hang glider. It's really quite amusing. However, my number one priority is the passengers' safety, so I simply cannot have Alvin put himself or anyone else at risk again. Believe me, I understand. If Alvin breaks any more of our rules, there will be consequences. Last thing we want is anyone getting hurt. Excuse me. Oh! (sizzling) (gasping) Hot. Here. Unbelievable. Gravy pants. Hey. Hey. Do you have a problem with me? Oh, you bet I have a problem with you. Why? I don't know. Ian? What are you doing here? I'm working, Dave. This is your job? Yeah, not too many record labels are interested in hiring the guy who blew it with the Chipmunks, blew it with the Chipettes and passed on Justin Bieber... twice. Look, Ian, I'm sorry you lost your job and... your dignity, but spilling things, hot things on me isn't going to bring any of that stuff back. You're right, Dave. It's too late for me to get my old life back. But it's not too late to ruin yours. You want to ruin my life? Why don't we just start with this vacation? If I see those chipmunks break so much as one rule, I'm going straight to Captain Correlli. You're in my house now! Although, I mean, technically, it's not a house; it's a ship. The point is, I'll be watching you. Like a hawk. (eerie music playing) Theodore? Please don't eat my brain. (growling) Why are you watching "Jungle Monster Four"? Alvin, how could you...? Alvin? Simon? Girls? Oh no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'll be right back. (TV shuts off) (gasps) It's dark. You're up for an International Music Award. That's fantastic! Yeah, it's pretty cool, I guess, if you like a lot of adulation. We fly there right after the cruise. Hoping to take home Record of the Year. That would make you the youngest winner ever. I'm not that young. (chuckles) I mean, I'm hanging out in a casino way past my bedtime. Not that I have a bedtime. No one tells me what to do. Alvin! Who's Alan, I wonder? Anyway, I'd love to chat more, but I got to run. You're in a lot of trouble, young man. Uh, you can follow me on Critter! Alvin! Alvin! Simon? I wasn't betting. Honest. Your winnings, sir. Oh, busted! I didn't sneak out. I mean, I did, but only to stop Alvin. Right. IAN: There they are, Captain. Captain. Oh, what's he going to do, make us walk the plank? There's a plank? No, there's no plank, but if you guys disobey me one more time, you will be off the ship. And you'll miss the International Music Awards. Do you understand? Yes, Dave. Uh-huh. Uh, what if we need to disobey you? And why would you need to do that? Well, let's say that you tell me to stay put. "Alvin, if you move from that chair, you're grounded." But then I happen to see pirates climbing up ropes, ever so stealthy, from the side of the ship. Now, it would be easy for me to take my trusty ol' Swiss Army knife and cut the ropes. But I have to stay put. Or do I? Uh, yes, Alvin, you do. And what are you doing with a pocket knife? What pocket knife are you referring to? Come on, give it to me. You could cut yourself. So, I could have saved the whole ship from robbage and pilgering and you'd still ground me? Alvin, there's no such word as "robbage." And it's "pillaging." But he does have a point, Dave. I mean, there's got to be times when you trust us to take matters into our own hands. I trusted you tonight, and look where that got me. Mm, that's probably just the hot gravy talking. You're all lucky Captain Correlli's allowed you one more activity. Is it hanggliding, wakeboarding or bungee jumping? No. Shuffleboard. Aw! Man! By my calculations, it appears to be ten percent shuffle, 90% bored. (chuckles) That's funny. Oh. Uh, yeah, thanks. Uh, you really think so? You know, Dave, I think I'd prefer the plank. Sorry, Alvin, but this is what you get to do. And I get to do something I haven't done in a long time ` absolutely nothing. (ship horn blows) Brittany approaches her puck, adjusts her stance, looks over at me, quite annoyed, wonders to herself if I'm ever going to shut my mouth, realizes I'm not, and makes her move. And... oh! Oh, it's short! (laughs) A costly error, ladies and gentlemen, that's going to haunt her the rest of her career. (mock laughs) You can make all the jokes you want, Alvin, but not even you can make this interesting. ALVIN: Oh, really? Well, care to make it interesting that I can make this interesting? Alvin, what are you up to? Need I remind you Dave is watching us? Simon, the poor guy hasn't had a moment's peace since he met us. He's exhausted. Check this out. In three, two, one... (snaps fingers) lights out. (snoring) Time to turn punishment into funishment. (laughs) You get it? I took the "pun" in "punishment," and turned it into "fun" but kept the "ishment." It's wordplay! Uh-huh. Wha...? Oh. Hey, kid. Want to make a trade? That's a nice-looking kite. Yeah! Whoohoohoo! I can see Russia from here! Whoo! (snoring) Whoo! (laughs) (laughter) Come on, Simon, grab on. Forget it. All I ever do is try to save him, and it only gets me in trouble! (screaming) This won't end well. Simon, do something! Oh, seriously? Simon, help! Alvin's gotten himself in a bind. Looks like it's Simon saving him again! Whoa! (grunting) (all sigh) (laughs) Thanks, bro. No! (snoring) (gasps) (screaming) (screaming) Huh? Thank you! Rockabye, Davey, on the lounge chair If you awake, you'll pull out your hair. (people murmuring) Whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa! Hey! Dave! Dave! Dave! Dave! Dave! Help us! Dave! (screams) Guys! Guys! (screaming) No! No! No, no, no, no, no! (screaming) Dave! Help us! Okay. No, no, no, no, no. You want to go hang gliding, sign up at the Excursion Desk like everyone else. Ian, you don't understand. Dave Seville's so special, that the rules don't apply to him. Let go! No, you let go. (both screaming) Hey! Come on! Great! Oh, my God! (both screaming) I need my pelican head! Ian! You idiot! (both screaming) (both gasping) Oh, no! No, no! Oh! (ship horn blowing) Great. Way to go, Seville. Me?! Yeah, you! Hey! Save your breath, Dave. They'll come back for me. In retrospect, this was a bad idea. We're losing altitude! I don't think I can make it much longer. I'm so hungry. Just one bite. No. A nibble? No nibbles. M-Maybe I can just lick the glaze? The glaze is what's keeping you alive, Theodore. Its high fat content is creating a waterproof barrier. I'm gonna starve to death! Actually, there are many other things that will kill you before starvation. Dehydration, sunstroke... An island! No, an island would probably be helpful. So if you see one, you should definitely say something. Uh, Jeanette? Oh! (all groaning) (chuckles) We're alive! We're alive! Good. 'Cause now... I'm going to kill you! Guys, guys, guys! Nobody is killing anyone, okay? No matter how much he deserves it. Thank you, Si. Though, could've done without the passive aggression. (clears throat) Look, we've got nothing to worry about. Dave knows we're gone by now; he probably has the whole Coast Guard looking for us. Meantime, why don't we all just relax and have some doughnut? Did you guys want some? (all groan) Theodore! Alvin! Simon! Can't you kick any faster? It's been two hours, Dave. Thanks to biannual Pilates classes, I have legs that won't quit, but they do slow down. Well, take those feet off, let me kick. They don't come off. It's one piece. No quality mascot suit has removable feet. Well, take the suit off, then. I can't. Why not? I'm not wearing anything underneath. Look! No, no, it's-it's okay, I believe you. No, look! Look, an island! Maybe the chipmunks washed up there. Kick! Faster! Come on. (grunting) Okay, there we go. It won't be long before a rescue plane sees our SOS and flies us back to civilization. I don't hear any planes. Or helicopters. Maybe Dave is coming in a hot air balloon. 'Cause those things are really quiet. I don't think Dave is gonna be in a hot air balloon. But he is coming, right? Of course he is. Just maybe not today. Alvin's right. We should prepare to stay the night. What?! You guys expect me to sleep outside? Uh, last I checked, Brit, we're chipmunks. We're used to living in the wild. Uh, no, we used to be used to living in the wild. Come on, Brit, it's just one night. (scoffs) One cold night. So we'll make a fire. We're always setting things on fire accidentally. How hard can it be when we put our minds to it? And how are you intending to do that? I will create a spark by striking this rock with my Swiss Army knife, which Dave took from me. (scoffs, chuckles) I suppose you have a better idea, smart guy. As a matter of fact, I do, smart guy. As you can see, the lens concentrates the energy of the sun, thus creating fire! (sizzling, crackling) Whoa. Impressive. (chuckles) Uh, thanks, thank you, thanks for, uh, thinking that. (sizzling) (sniffing) Hot, hot, hot, hot! (screaming) (sighs) We have made fire! So, what do we do now? # Kumbaya, my Lord # Kumbaya ALL: # Kumbaya, my Lord # Kumbaya # Kumbaya, my Lord # Kumbaya # Oh, Lord # Kumbaya Alvin! Brittany! We've got to head inland. If we climb to the top of that mountain, we'll be able to get a better view of the island, see if they're here. All right, got it. What are you doing? Building a fire. You know, one time in the studio, Snoop ran out of matches, got a blaze going with just two carrot sticks. Figure, how hard can it be? No, I've` Forget the fire. We have to start hiking. Yeah, okay, Dave. Look, it's getting dark... ish. It's gonna be cold. I'm gonna build a fire. We'll go in the morning. No, we'll go now. Hey! Hang on! Don't take that tone of voice with me, Dave. I'm not one of your chipmunks that you can just boss around and stuff into a cage whenever you feel like it. Calm down. Jeez, no wonder those fur balls would rather fly off the ship than spend another day with you. They didn't do it on purpose. It was an accident. They're just kids. I don't know how long they can survive out there. INDISTINCT CHATTER ENGINE RUMBLES, REVS ENGINE REVS INDISTINCT CHATTER TENSE MUSIC HEARTBEAT THUDS ENGINE REVS GEARS CRANK, ENGINE REVS, TYRES PEAL Whoo! ENGINE ROARS, TYRES PEAL Yo! TYRES SQUEAL Whoo-hoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! I feel like I'm in a game. BOTH: Whoo! EXCITING MUSIC LAUGHTER, TYRES SQUEAL Far out! BOTH LAUGH This is insane! POWERFUL MUSIC ALVIN: And you guys were worried. (chuckles) Look at us! We're warm, we got a great fire going, beautiful night sky, and if a rescue helicopter comes by, they'll see us. Everything's gonna be fine. Good night, guys. Good night. (yawns) Good night. Night. OTHERS: Theodore! What? Dave always turns off the light after saying good night. That fire was sort of the only thing keeping us from freezing to death. Yeah. Can't you just relight it? How? With your glasses. And the sun. Oh. (sighs) # I'm a survivor # I'm not gonna give up # I'm not gonna stop # I'm gonna work harder # I'm a survivor # I'm gonna make it # I will survive # Keep on surviving. All right! Way to keep the spirits up, guys. Doing it, yeah! And what is this supposed to be? Breakfast! Yeah, for breakfast! Oh, I bet it's very good. (groaning) (coughing) (spitting) (groaning) It's not. It's been forever since our last all-you-can-eat buffet. Crazy suggestion, guys: let's get off this beach and let's find some real food. If I know my horticulture, and I do, this is a grove of mango trees. Uh, then where are all the mangoes? Maybe the Jungle Monster Four ate them all! (sighs) (sniffs) You were planning on sharing that, right? Uh, (chuckles) of course. Oh, well, good. 'Cause it kind of looked like you were gonna eat it all by yourself. What? (chuckles) I would never do that. I don't believe you. Hey! (rock music) (laughing) Oh! Oh, yeah! Winning! What? # Well, I'm just out of school # Acting real, real cool Whoohoo! # Got the message that I've gotta be a wild one # Ooh, yeah, I'm a wild one Oh, my acorns! Way to go, Theodore! Come on, we'll split it. Don't listen to him, Theo. He's gonna eat it all by himself. I'll share it with you. No. She's trying to trick you. No, you're trying to trick him. No, you're trying to trick him by saying I'm trying to trick him. He's lying, Theo! What? # Gonna meet all my friends # Gonna have ourselves a ball # Gonna tell all my friends # Gonna t-t-tell 'em all that I'm a wild one # Ooh, yeah, I'm a wild one Theodore, I am so sorry! # Gonna keep 'em moving wild # Gotta keep aswinging, baby # I'm a real wild child (screams) (screams) Oh, no! (all screaming) Whoa! (slowmotion yelling) My precious! My precious! (all yelling, shrieking) Stop it, stop it, stop it! Look at us. One day on this island, and we've become animals! (leaves rustling) (gasps) Did you hear that? (footsteps, rustling) (gasps) What was that? Jungle Monster. Positions, everybody. Hold. Hold. Fire! No! Why?! Please don't eat us, Mr. Jungle Monster! I'm not a monster, I'm Zoe. And I'm-I'm clearly a girl... ...wh-who has been on this island for so long that now she's imagining that squirrels can talk. Um, we are chipmunks. Yeah, Alvin and the Chipmunks. Who and the what now? I'm sure you've heard of the Chipettes. We're kind of world famous. Who? Maybe this will help. # Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah # Roma, roma, ma # Gaga, ooh, la, la # Want your bad romance # Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh, oh, oh # Caught in a bad romance... Yeah, okay, stop. Aw. Lame. Really? I don't know who you are. Awkward. Um, exactly how long have you been here? Well, um, I got here on a Monday, so, uh... yeah, like, you know, eight-eight or nine, um, years. Nine years? Wait, you've been here nine years? Well, it could be eight. (gasps) What if we're here nine years? What if we're here... forever? I told you, Dave is coming. (gasps) I used to think that Dave was coming, too. And he never did. Huh? Dave Henderson, my supervisor at UPS. I used to fly cargo planes for them, until one day I crash-landed in the ocean. (chuckles) We crash-landed, too! Really?! R-Right, Alvin? Absolutely. (chuckles) You mean I'm finally gonna get out of here? Oh, I can't wait to go tell the others! (gasps) There are others? I mean, can you guys imagine being stuck here for all these years without anybody to talk to? (chuckles): I think I'd lose my mind. Chipmunks, I'm pleased to introduce my friends. This is Rawlings, Spalding, Callaway, Dunlop, and right there, that's Nerf. Hey, girlfriend, you look good. They survived the crash with me. Okay. Hi. Hello. Okay. Guys, Dave is coming to get us! No, not Dave Henderson. (chuckles): I saw your face. It's another Dave. But, you guys, just get excited. We're finally gonna get off this island! (chuckles) She's funny. In a crazy sort of way. This totally calls for a party! Who's hungry? Yes! Yeah! I'm hungry. Yeah? Let's go to my place. Is it far? I don't think I could walk another step. Who said anything about walking? (yelling) (laughing) (whooping) # It doesn't really mean that I'm into you (all screaming) # Hello, ohohoh (whooping) BRITTANY: We're gonna die! (whooping) # Hello Yeah! Whoo! That was so cool! I know, I know! (chipmunks screaming) Come on! Come on in, guys! Yeah, bring it in! Whoo-hoo! Yeah! Wasn't that awesome?! No, it was not awesome. It's a miracle we got here safely. In fact, uh, the odds of a chipmunk getting hurt on a zipline are one out of six. (screams) (thud) (sighs) Why do I always have to be right? (Eleanor groaning) Ellie, Ellie! Are you okay? I think I sprained my ankle! Ooh. You know what? You should put some ice on that. Oh, no, guys, I don't have any ice. I-I live there in that tree. (chuckles) I just... I thought that maybe you did, though. No, we don't have any ice. Just like we don't have any shelter. Wow. That's a major bummer for you. Do you guys like bungee jumping? (laughing): Yes! No, we do not. Listen, lady, maybe you should just leave us alone so we can focus more on surviving and less on killing ourselves. (chuckles) That is a lot of uptight in a very little package. I'm not uptight. I just don't want to see anyone else getting hur... Ow! Criminy. What was that? That was just a spider, and they live here because this is nature. That is not just a spider. That's a Phoneutria bahiensis. Its bite contains a neurotoxin. Ooh. Mr. Fancy Words. (chuckling): So what? Alvin, toxin? Poison? Neuro? Brain? Oh. That's not good. Uh, side effects include, uh, changes in personality, uh, loss of inhibition, (gasps) dry mouth. OK, calm down. I get bitten probably twice a day by these little fellows, and I am still completely normal. Yes, normal. Oh no. Girl chubby one! Brittany! Jeanette! I hope they're OK. Oh, who cares if they're okay? I just need them to be here. Oh, and here I am thinking you've changed and don't only care about yourself. Nope. And it's a good thing, too. Because, right now, the rage I'm feeling for you and those chipmunks is the only thing keeping me going. Shall we keep going? Ian, just keep an eye out for something to eat or drink, all right? All right. (gasps) Right there! Where? That thing around your neck. You're not going to eat this. This was a gift from Theodore. Oh, that explains it. I was going to say, it's really ugly. (chuckling): Like, really. Wow. (groans) Ugly. It's not ugly. (Ian groans) It goes with everything, and it's soft enough to sleep in. Yeah, and it's edible. You will not eat my son's necklace. He's not your son, Dave. He's just a chipmunk. Oh, Dave. Where are you? Where are you, Alvin? IAN: All right. (sighs) I'm going to crash. (sighs) (snoring) (grunts) (grunting) (muttering) Bonjour. (muttering) Oui, de Simone. (snoring) Simon. Where are you going? (French accent): Who is this Simon you speak of? Um, you. No, my name is not Simon. It is... Simone! That's pretty close to Simon. And yet completely different. Would you care to join me on my adventure? What adventure? The adventure... called life! Okay. But just until Dave shows up. (snoring) Alvin! Alvin! Simon and Theodore are gone. They... they probably just went to get stuff for the shelter. It's all the guy can talk about. (yawns) Could you please go look for them? Oh, why can't you? Uh, I have a situation of my own to deal with, Alvin. Oh, right. How's Eleanor doing? Huh? She's fine. I'm talking about me. It's been two days since my last bath, and I am a mess. I-I can't get rescued looking like this. (snorts) Oy. Theo! Simon! Simon! Theodore! Theo! Si! Theo! Bonjour, my friend. Simon? Are you bungee jumping? His name is not Simon. It is Simone. Uh, that's pretty close to Simon. Yeah, I thought so, too. But he's acting totally different. (laughs) The spider bite! That's it! Remember the side-effects? Personality changes? Loss of inhibition? Lies! Who are you? Wow. Simone is pretty cool. It's Simon, Theodore. And no, he's not. Au revoir, Alfred. Whee! Alvin. It's Alvin! Whoo! C'est magnifique, Simone! Okay, Theo, it's all you. Really? I've never done anything like this. And you never will. How can you let him do this? What are you thinking? I'm thinking, "When did my dad wash up on this island?" What? Why do you have to show up and be so uptight? Ha! Me uptight? (chuckles) I'm not the uptight one; I'm the fun one. The cool one. Ask anybody. Who should I ask? (Simon and Theodore laugh) Come on. Theodore, you can't bungee jump. You get scared just watching a movie. Munk up, Alvin. (grunts) (snapping) (muffled): Uh, a little help? Ah, much better. Jeanette, these dresses are, like, totally adorbs. I die. Thank you. And I also made these for you, Eleanor. Oh, look how handy you are... all of a sudden. And in case you get tired, I made you a wheelchair. Oh, super. J'arrive! Enchante, mademoiselles. A kiss. Mmm. A kiss. Mmm. And a... (chuckles) A kiss. Mmm. (sighing chuckle) What's gotten into him? Spider venom. Yeah, yeah, he thinks he's some sort of fun-loving French dude. Really? Now he thinks he's the... (FRENCH ACCENT) most interesting munk in the world. (Simon kissing repeatedly) Simon? Simon. (chuckles) Simone? Oui? I think we should get to work on that shelter. Pourquoi? I cannot imagine a better roof over our heads than the stars in the sky. What about the kind of roof over our head that's actually a roof? It's going to rain. What is a little rain? Hmm? We cherish the water, for it is the water that nurtures the flower. Okay. This is crazy. Building a shelter was your idea. (thunder crashing) Oh, great. Great! All right, guys, we're going to build a shelter. I need everyone's help. Let's go. I'll try, but I feel so useless. (gasps) What... what are you doing? What I've wanted to do since the moment I laid my eyes all over on you. (dance music) What? (dance music continues) Hey, you guys are going to catch pneumonia dancing in the rain like that. # I say hey, I be gone today # But I'll be back around the way # Seems like everywhere I go # The more I see, the less I know # But I know one thing # That I love you... Aah! (groans) You ought to be careful kicking mud around like that. Hello! # I've been a lot of places all around the way # I've seen a lot of joy and I've seen a lot of pain # But I don't want to write a love song for the world # No, I just want to write a song... That looks like fun. # Rocking in the dance hall, moving with you # Dancing in the night in the middle of June # My mama told me, don't lose you # I say hey, I be gone today... Um, Eleanor, would you care to dance? # I'd love to. With me? Yes, Theodore! (giggles) I can't believe Jeanette's getting all the attention. I mean, I'm the pretty one. Jeanette's the smart one. You don't see me running around trying to be all smart, do you? I know. I'm the fun one; you're the pretty one. Do you know how slippery that dirt is? This is ridiculous. Are you even listening to me? Simon! Uh, Alvin,... you're starting to sound like Dave. No...! (thunder crashing) (grunts, sighs) (bubbling) (sighs) Hmm. What are you doing? Ugh. Building a shelter. Since I'm not the fun one any more, I figure I may as well be... (shudders, gags) the responsible one. Ew. Really? Well, since I'm not the pretty one any more, maybe I should build a shelter too. Yeah, good luck with that. What, you don't think I could do it? Hey, I didn't say that, Brit. I thought it, but I didn't say it. So you want to play it this way. Allonsy! (sighs) He's so French. JEANETTE: Oh! Be careful, Simone! Let's do it. (creaking) (both shuddering) Oh! (Theodore and Eleanor whimpering) Now, wasn't that a pleasant ride? Good thing we don't wear pants. Okay, you guys, come on. Come over. Uh, are you sure it's safe? Of course it's safe. I do this thing every day. (screaming) Oh! Oh, oh! Oh! THEODORE: Jeanette! Jeanette! Hold on, Jeanette. Tien, ma chere. No, no. Look into my eyes. You have nothing to fear. Yes, yes. Very good. Voila! You are safe. Bravo, mademoiselle. You made it! Aw. Wow. (sighs) ELEANOR: Pretty. THEODORE: Whoa. Double rainbow. What does it mean? Alive, they're superstars, sure, but dead, they're legends. I'm talking about tribute albums, pay-per-view funerals. W-w-wait a second. You actually think I'm in this for the money? (chuckles) Well, if you're doing it to pick up chicks, you're doing a lousy job. I'm doing this because I love them, okay? Look, if you want to spend the rest of your life running around after a bunch of spoiled brats, be my guest. They're not brats. You never even bothered to get to know them, Ian. I mean, sure, Alvin can be kind of a handful, but he means well. He's sometimes just... a little irresponsible, that's all. (grunting) (sighs) Hmm. But come on ` Simon? He's probably the most level-headed kid I know. If anything, he's a little too uptight. (grunts, yells) (whooping) (cheering) And then there's little Theodore. Dave. I barely cared about what you had to say about the first two. I can't imagine the "big-boned one" is going to be any more interesting. You know what, forget it. Let's just keep going. (growls) (gasps, grunts) (gargling): Yeehaw! Up, poisson, up! Ooh, la, la. Oh no. This is terrible. Shouldn't he have come up by now? Uh-oh. Simone! Where are you? Zoe, you got to do something. All right. Callaway, I need you to go in there and find Simone. I know you can do it, little buddy. (grunts) Uh, you're kidding, right? If Callaway can't find him, nobody can. Oh! (groans) (gasps) Simone! Told you. I'm sorry if I caused you any worry, mademoiselle. But I have something for you. Maybe this will be a way to make it up. Oh! It's beautiful! Where did you find it? Yeah, it is beautiful. Where did you find it? In a cave behind the waterfall. I thought it would look nice on you. But now I realize even the most precious gem cannot compare to your beauty. BOTH: Aw. The... Yeah. Were there any other jewels or gems or diamonds or anything else in there? By the time I found the gold, I had already been gone from my Jeanette far too long. Aw. What? You guys, they found it. They found it! And the best part is, they don't even know what they found. They think that it's just one bracelet. Which means that the rest of the treasure is mine. All mine! (laughing maniacally) (grunts) (animal growls) What the...? (rustling, low growling) Whoa! What are you? Yeah... Hey! Wha... Oh! Oh, yeah, you're one of those honey badgers. You just take what you want. Drop it. Drop it! You mess with me, ese, I'll go loco on you. Whoa! Hey! Whoa! (grunting) Give it back! (growls) Whoa! (yells) You can sting like a bee or strike like a cobra, but this honey munk don't care. Okay, Brit, I'm all done. If you want, I can help you get started o... Whoa-ho-ho-ho! This tree house is awesome! Maybe you are kind of the smart one. Thank you, Alvin. And yours is... Well... you did your best. Anyhoo, no reason we can't be comfortable and stylish while we wait for Dave to show up, right? Um, Brit, I... I think I know why Dave hasn't come. You do? Why? 'Cause he's not even looking. Alvin, why wouldn't he be looking for us? Because I drive him crazy. You know, the way Simon's been driving me crazy? I mean, that's what I've been doing to Dave. For years. No wonder he hates me. (sighs) Aw, d-don't... don't worry, Alvin. I'm sure Dave will come. I mean, he certainly loves Simon and Theodore. (grunting): Un, deux, trois... Simon? Is Dave ever gonna find us? Simon? Uh, uh, I mean, Simone? Ah, I'm so sorry, were you speaking to moi? Yes! About Dave! Are we ever going to find him? I see you are sad, mon ami. And I hate to see you sad. I will help you find your friend Dave. You really think you can find him? I know I can! And then I will find this Simon you keep speaking of! (creepy music) (grunts) (pants) (mysterious music) As Dave and I have never met, I will need you to describe him for me. Well, he's very kind and a good storyteller. Mm-hmm. Very helpful. Oh, and he's about this tall. Hmm, hmm. Is he by any chance a big, flightless bird? I don't think so. Then these footprints must not be his. (gasps) Jungle Monster. (squeaking, rumbling) Do you hear that? Yeah, it's my stomach rumbling. No, no, maybe it's a helicopter! Listen! (rumbling continues) Face it, Dave, no one is coming to rescue us, okay? And my stomach noises are gonna get louder and louder and louder, until one day they just stop. Because I will have eaten you. Maybe you're right. Maybe no one's coming. Maybe the chipmunks aren't here at all. Maybe they're gone. I really messed up. Dave, it kills me to say this, kills me, but... look, man... (sighs) You're really good with those kids, really good. They love you. And I should know 'cause, you know, I was really bad with those kids and they hate me. But look, you should know that whatever happens, you did nothing wrong... nothing. Thanks, Ian. (whispers): Come here. Yeah. Yeah. (chewing and grunting) Uh, uh, uh, uh, Ian? Um, uh, I-Ian? Ian! Give it! (grunting) Mon dieu! (yelling) The Jungle Monster's real! And it's angry! Or hungry. Allonsy! Uh, that means let's go. Oh. Ow! Great, a volcano. Of course! That's why the water was so hot! It's being heated by the underground magma chamber! How do you know that? I have no idea! The place where I get my nails done always has the Science Channel on. Maybe I accidentally paid attention. Hey, guys, anyone up for a quick hike? Like, I don't know, maybe to the waterfall or whatever? Not now, Zoe! The whole island's going to explode! What? Guys, we've got to get off this island. We have to build a raft, now. Right now like, right now? Or right now like, after a hike to the waterfall now? (snapping) DAVE: Whoa! I've been hit! By Dave's necklace? Tell Jeanette I will watch over her with angel wings. (grunts) Dave? (chuckles) Theodore! (sighs) (both sighing) SIMON: Dave? Haha! Told you we'd find him! Simon! It is Simone, but I am often confused for this Simon fellow. Perhaps we look alike. Simone? Ian! Hey, you found the chubby one. Don't worry, Theodore. Nothing's gonna happen to you. Is it? Eh. (rumbling) (gasps) What was that? Uh, that's an active volcano. (loud rumbling) Okay, Brittany and I will build the deck. Eleanor, you need to start braiding ropes. Jeanette, find as many coconuts and mangoes as you can. Who knows how long we'll be out there? What can I do to help? ELEANOR: Dave! JEANETTE: Dave! Yay! BRITTANY: Dave! (giggles) Yeah! Hooray! Dave! You found us! (giggling): Yay! Hey! We missed you so much. I knew you would find us. Ow! Ow! Oh! Eleanor, what happened? Oh, you know, just a zipline accident. A what? No, I'm fine. It only hurts when I try to explain it. Okay, you know what, never mind. The important thing is you guys are safe. Alvin? Everything's gonna be okay. Hey, what is it? I... I thought you'd never find us. That you weren't even looking. What? Uh, wwhy wouldn't I look for you? Because I'm such a pain in the... Alvin... I know you don't think I'm a pain. No, you're a pain. But I'd come no matter what. (sighing) SIMON: Arc de Triomphe, mayonnaise, Napoleon... Ugh, I get it, Frenchie, you come from a rich history. Well, guess what, we're all going to be history if we don't get out of here. What's he doing here? It's kind of a long story. Yes, for a pelican man. Oh, yeah. Nothing cooler than a grown man in a pelican suit. So, Dave, how are we gonna get out of here? I don't know, Alvin, I think you've got this under control. Theodore, you and Eleanor are on rope duty. Dave and Ian, we need oars. Simone, you and Jeanette are in charge of food. And, Zoe... I'm gonna go and I'm gonna pack up my balls! Who's that? Another long story. (chuckles) Yeah! Good work, guys! Let's get off this island. This raft won't build itself. (grunts) Whoa! (grunting) Go, go, go! Heave! ALVIN: Ho! Heave! Heave! ALVIN: Ho! (grunts) (clanging) It's incredible, you guys. Very impressive. Just seeing everyone come together to build it, I just want to say... (loud rumbling) It can wait. Wait, where are Jeanette and Simone? (sighs) I hope this is going to be enough. (gasps) Did you hear something? Who can say? When I am with you, all I can hear is the beating of my own heart. Oh, Simone! (groans) Oh! (gasps) (screams) (pants): Oh no! Oh no! (panting) (screams) Jeanette? Come quick, hurry! Simone! (normal voice): Why are you calling me Simone? Simon? (laughs) You're back! It finally wore off! Wh-what wore off? You were bitten by a spider. It, like, messed up your brain. Ah. Is that why I think I see Dave and a half Ian, half bird? No, it's really me. And really Ian. 'Sup? ALVIN: Simon, where's Jeanette? She was out here with you. Jeanette? I-I-I don't know... I do. It's Zoe. She took her. Simon, I need to know where you found that gold bracelet. Why? What, what gold bracelet? The one you gave to Jeanette. What? When did I give Jeanette a bracelet? On your date. (gasps) Jeanette and I are dating? Okay, he's useless. Theodore, Eleanor, you're gonna have to lead the way. I don't remember exactly how to get there. (panting) I do! DAVE: Which way, Eleanor? ELEANOR: Make a left. No, right. No, left! I thought you said you knew where you were going. I do! Sometimes I just forget my left from my right. That way! Okay, we just have to cross here. (shrieks) Are you kidding me? Guys, I can't do that. But Simon, you already did. No, I-I didn't. Uh, that was Simone, that, that was not me. But Simone is you. He's in there somewhere. You just have to find him, tout suite. Because Jeanette needs you, Simon. No, eh, I'm sorry, I-I-I just can't do it. All right, Ian, get everyone to the raft. If the volcano blows before I make it out of here, you have to promise me you'll... (sighs): Okay. Dave, I'm coming with you. Absolutely not. It's too dangerous. Remember I said someday I may need to disobey you? Sorry, Dave, but I gotta disobey you. Let's go. (rumbling continues) But, but the volcano's about to explode! But, but the volcano's about to explode! Oh? Well, then I guess you better hurry, huh? (chuckles) Run, go, go. In you go. Get down there. That's right. Keep going. # S.O.S. # Please someone help me # It's not healthy # For me to feel this # Y.O.U. # Are making it hard # I can't help it # See, it don't feel right Keep moving! # This time, please # Someone come and rescue me... Okay! Pull me up. I-I-I can't hold any more. If you can still talk, it means you haven't stuffed your cheeks yet! (muffled yelling) Yes, that sounds very good. Jeanette! ALVIN: Dave! They're supposed to be behind that waterfall! That's right. That's what I'm talking about. (muffled shouting) ALVIN: Zoe! No, no! Not another step. Don't come any closer. Are you all right, Jeanette? (gags) (sighs) I'm pretty freaked out, and those earrings tasted awful. (gags, smacks lips) Zoe, you don't have to do this. Oh, I don't? I spent ten years looking for this treasure. It's the whole reason why I came to this stinking island! You mean, you mean you didn't crash-land? They said that I was crazy, and they said that this map was a fake. And now the treasure is mine! (loud rumbling) (grunts) Run! (grunts) Jeanette, come on, come on. Run! (screams) ZOE: No, you don't! Jeanette! Oh, no, no! (straining grunt) Help, help! (grunts) Oh, no, help! You're going back in that cave, and you are going to get me more treasure. (pants) SIMON: Jeanette! (wails) Simone! It's Simon! (yelling and panting) (creaking) (shouting) (panting and groaning) (distorted): Alvin! (distorted): No! (grunts) Ah! (gasps) Hurry! DAVE: Come on, guys, go! Go, go! Come on, come on. (creaking) (grunts and yells) (distant rumbling) Oh! Ow. Look! Come on! Run! Where's Dave? (grunting) Help me up! Oh, help you up? (chuckles) Is that what I'm supposed to do now, Dave? All I had was my treasure, and now it's gone. Do you get that? My life is ruined! And now you're gonna know how that feels. No, no! It's tempting to blame Dave. I know. I've been there. I wish I could get back all those years I spent plotting my revenge. All that time and energy, wasted. All those pizzas I had delivered to his house, wasted. That was you? You could let Dave fall to his death, and I could go back to the raft with the chipmunks, become their manager again and make tons of money. So, really, I'm-I'm good either way. But let me tell you something. (loud rumbling) Hate, anger, regret those aren't just members of a girl group I once signed. They're what consumed me. And they're consuming you. It's not too late to do the right thing. Or not. Again, I'm good either way, so I don't want to sway you. What are you guys doing? Help me, please. Help me save my dad! Hurry! I got you, Dave! Come on! Help me, guys! Wow! There they are! (gasping) Oh, no! Let's go, go, go! Oh, no! Oh! Come on! Get up! Get up! (screams) (all screaming) Grab the oar! Come on. Come on, guys! Paddle! Come on, paddle! Faster! Come on! Hurry! (explosive boom) # Vacation, all I ever wanted # Vacation, had to get away # Vacation, meant to be spent alone... Now we'll never get to perform at the International Music Awards. I guess now we're the losers. Jeanette, I don't know what to say. I guess I was just so obsessed with finding that treasure, that I kind of I lost it. I'm really sorry. We both are. Here, I want you to have this. Oh. Really? (chuckles): Oh! Look, Dunlop, this is a new beginning for both of us. Oh! I hope you don't mind. Simone gave it to me. Oh, I don't mind. You know, Jeanette, even the most perfect gem cannot compare to your beauty. Um, Dave? Yes, Alvin? I just wanted to say, now that we're not all, you know, (chuckles) dead, sorry... sorry, huh? Um, sorry I was acting like a child on the ship and kind of, maybe ruined our family vacation. Sometimes a racehorse needs a little room to run. Yes, yeah. I like where your head's at. That is very wise, David. IAN: 'Sup? What, no love for Uncle Ian? Seriously? Are we still talking about that? New subject ` I saved Dave's life. Okay, but I'll be watching you, mister. Alvin, do you still have that pocket knife I gave you? Knife? Oh, right. (chuckles) Sorry, I meant to give it back. No, I want you to keep it. Really? Maybe you can use it to signal that helicopter. What?! Aah! Hey! We're down here! Hello! (all shouting) IAN: It's me, Ian Hawke! Jet Records! Guys, circle around! PILOT (over speakers): Everything's OK. We got you, guys! (crowd cheering) ("Born This Way" playing) # My mama told me when I was young # we're all born superstars. # She rolled my hair and put my lipstick on # in the glass of her boudoir. # Ah, ah, ah, ah. # "There's nothing wrong with loving who you are" # she said, "Cos he made you perfectly" # Ah, ah, ah, ah. # "So hold your head up, girl, and you'll go far. # Listen to me when I say..." # I'm beautiful in my way, cos God makes no mistakes. # I'm on the right track, baby, I was born this way. # Don't hide yourself in regret. Just love yourself and you're set. # I'm on the right track, baby, I was born this way. # You know, # ain't no stopping us now. # We're on the move. # Hey, hey. # We've got the groove. # There ain't no stopping us now. # Cos, baby, you're a firework. # Come on, show 'em what you're worth. # Make 'em go, oh, oh, oh # as you shoot across the sky. # Cos, baby, there ain't no stopping us now. # We're on the move. It's good to be back, huh? Sure is. Sold Zoe's story to Hollywood. Huge bidding war. Keira Knightley's interested. I'm thinking 50 Cent for me. # We're on the move. # Come on, let your colours burst. # We've got the groove. # I was born... this... # way. (crowd cheering) Thank you! Thank you! You're a great audience! We love you! ("Party Rock Anthem" playing) I'm sorry, sir, that's full. We're gonna have to gate check those. Are you gonna charge me 25 bucks a bag? Of course not, sir. It's $25 for the first bag and $40 for each additional bag. I'm a little chilly. Would you mind adjusting the vent? But of course. Oh, you wrinkled my business magazine. Ooh, sorry. Guess I'll have to read this. Ooh, she's pretty. Oh, wait, that's me. All right, head count. Boo! (roaring) You like my Jungle Monster costume? Eleanor made it for me. Yeah! Out of a barf bag! Nice. Where's Alvin? ALVIN (over P.A.): Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We're cleared for an on-time departure for Timbuktu. If Timbuktu is not for you, please alert the flight attendant by pressing your call button. Alvin. Thank you for choosing Air Alvin. Uh, enjoy your flight! Sir, please return to your seat. We're about to take off. Sit. Now. But he... No, no, no! Alvin! ("Party Rock Anthem" resumes) # Party rock is in the house tonight... # www.able.co.nz Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air. Able 2014.