Donna Marie Rafferty, I'm arresting you for fraud, money laundering and tax evasion. She has defrauded the government of over $2 million. Sweetheart, the salon runs at a loss. If all this drags on, you might not be able to afford a mortgage. WOMAN: Sorry, our mother works here? I'm the manager. She's the boss, takes a real interest in the girls. I need you to look after the massage parlour, do the side banking. Here's the towels. Towels? So that's not legal either? It'll keep us going until we get the payout on your dad's life insurance. But whatever Mum's done, it's not because she wanted to get rich. Everything she's done she's done for us. So (SIGHS) I think we should help. I'm in. I'm in. OK. Yes, Matt. If it's such an emergency, I can be there. PHONE BEEPS PHONE RINGS DISTANTLY Off early? Uh, I've got an appointment. Another family thing? Yes, as a matter of fact. MAN: Ms Rafferty. > Hello, Detective. I was just on my way in to see you. Any particular reason? Kat. Can I call you Kat? Sure. Thing is, Kat ` I like your mother. I really do, and I just wanna get this whole business sorted. Well, you could always drop the charges. Yeah, not gonna happen. You do know we are busy gathering evidence? But if your mother was to just tell us what she knows... > She's not gonna do that, because she doesn't know anything. Well... that's a bit of a shame. Mm. Where are you going? Nowhere. God, I feel like a criminal. It's fine. Hi. We're here for the... towels. It's a code that worked for me and your mother. I'm not sure it counts as an emergency. It's the washing machine; it's on the blink. OK? Do you have any idea how much washing comes through this place? Sheets and towels every day. Bye, Greg. Don't be a stranger. Hi. Hi, Matt. It's nice to see you again. Hey, Lisa. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) If that washing machine blows up, it won't be pretty, and your mother said you were to authorise changes. The towels will be ready for pickup tomorrow, sweet cheeks. Oh. OK. We'll get back to you tomorrow. That is a shitload of towels. Yeah, Carol said they were busy cos the rugby was in town. Hey. Keep that hidden. SOFTLY: Hey, don't look, but that car was parked there yesterday. Don't look! Do you think it's the cops? I dunno. I think you're paranoid. No. Back home, huh? Yeah, kind of had to. We gave notice on the flat, but, uh, don't have the house yet,... but good to see you, eh, bro. (CHUCKLES) You need a hand? Uh, we're sweet. (CHUCKLES GENTLY) Oh my God. Help! What's the matter? What's wrong? It's pink. It's supposed to be white. (SIGHS) Everyone knows you don't wash reds with whites. W` So? Mum used to do my washing, and I'm really missing her, OK? So don't give me a hard time. Uh-uh-uh! No way. Bullshit. You will not waste this planet's resources while there is plenty of sunshine outside. Piss off, Tree-Hugger. Hang them (FORCEFULLY) on the line. RATTLING (SIGHS) Fine. Eco-fascist. < Wow, you really go the extra mile for the planet, don't you? You're putting the cash in here?! I thought it would be the last place Leo would look. Matt, you were supposed to bank it. I-I know, but it's not that easy. I ran into Margo last week from school. What if she saw me banking that much cash? Jesus, Matt, now who's paranoid? I'm a teacher. I'm a commercial lawyer; I could get disbarred. (SIGHS) True. Wait. I know how we bank this. Put it in here. All of it. All of it. LOW, CURIOUS MUSIC PEN SCRATCHES < ENGINE STARTS Captions by Shrutika Gunanayagam. Edited by Alana Drayton. www.able.co.nz Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air. Able 2016 Well, I hope your graduation goes really well. Thanks. Hi, Kat. Hey. Can we...? Do you need a blow wave? (CHUCKLES) No, I don't need a blow wave. What about a treatment? No, I don't need a treatment. Your ends are a wee bit frizzy. OK. I need you to do something. BAG RUSTLES Can you... bank this? What is it? B, it's money, obviously. It's takings from the salon. No, it's not! Yeah, OK! Jeez. (CLEARS THROAT) See, um,... you need the money in the salon account so you can get paid and so the bank will approve your mortgage. I hate lying to Tane about it so much. All you have to do is give the bag to the teller, put it in the account... I-I can do that. Great. OK. So do you wanna treatment while we`? While you here? OK. No, no, (CHUCKLES) I'm fine. < I'm OK. CURIOUS MUSIC I'm s'posed to be on my break. As soon as I get back from the bank. I'm meant to be meeting Lucas for coffee, but I could do the banking on the way. No, it has to go into this particular account. I have been to a bank before. Hi. Uh, sorry to interrupt. Are you Bianca Rafferty? Yes. How can I help? Oh, hi, I'm Imogen. I'm with Renshaw Cooper, and I know Mike, your real estate agent. He's lovely. Yes, and I was asking him who got the house in Carmine Ave, and, um, well, (CHUCKLES) I think I'm related to you. Really? Yeah, small world, I know. Um, my mother is your mother's cousin. Oh wow. I've never even heard of you. Yes, well, (CHUCKLES DRILY) we have rather drifted apart, but, um` Oh, OK. SOFTLY: But I did see the paper. I know. We're all trying to stay positive. Yeah, and` and` and how's things going with the house? SOFTLY: It's just, um, you know, Mike said there were some difficulties. Oh, well, the bank said we can have the mortgage, but now they're looking again, because I wasn't earning as much as I thought I was, but we should be OK. Oh, sweetie, I hope so, because, you know, there are penalties. I know. (CHUCKLES GENTLY) Lovely place you've got here, bee-tee-dubs. I like it. And if there's ever anything I can do to help... Oh, that's so nice of you, but like I said... Gidday. Hi. ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS Hey, you know that thing you said you'd do for me? Yes. Yeah, you can do it. Great. Then can I have the rest of the day off? Sure. OK, well, lovely to meet you. Um, I'll leave you with your client. (CHUCKLES GENTLY) I guess you're not here for a trim? (INHALES DEEPLY) No. Actually, I just have a few questions about your mother's relationship to this business. Leo's all right? He doesn't love Meat-free Mondays. (CHUCKLES) He'll get used to it. How's Andrew? He's good. I'm meeting his parents tonight. Do hope I won't be a fly in the ointment. Why would you be? Well, you know, now you've finally met someone... normal. Not a lesbian. DOOR ALARM BUZZES I just want you to have a relationship that doesn't end in disaster. > They don't all end in disaster. DOOR SHUTS And Bianca and the house? > (SIGHS) Well, it's up to the bank now, but should be fine now there's (WHISPERS) some cash in the account. DOOR ALARM BUZZES DOOR SHUTS I like the look. Just trying to work out what to wear to your parents'. (SIGHS) Sorry, they cancelled. What? No! They do hate me. Don't be ridiculous. What, so they seriously don't mind that my mother's in prison? Remand, and they won't judge you. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) But, hey, since you're nearly undressed... (GIGGLES) PHONE RINGS, VIBRATES Oh bugger. Just... (PATS) (SIGHS) PHONES CONTINUES RINGING, VIBRATING ALARM BLARES DISTANTLY Kat Rafferty. DISTORTED SPEECH OVER PHONE Hello? CRACKLY: I said, 'It's Carol.' Hello? I can't hear you. ALARM BLARES I said I need you to get your arse down here right now. I'm a bit busy. (CHUCKLES) I don't give a damn, honey. We have an emergency. Shit. I'm sorry. Something's come up. It's a, um` (SIGHS) ...secret lover? Pfft. Not so secret any more. (GRUNTS REPEATEDLY) (CHUCKLES) Uh, it's a plumbing emergency. Leo's panicking, but I will be back as soon as I can. I'll be here... waiting. Oh my (SQUEALS) God. Thank you, boys. Remember, any time, we're always open. You're welcome. INDISTINCT RADIO TRANSMISSION Where's the fire? The washing machine started to smoke,... What?! ...set the sprinklers off. I may have mentioned it was on the blink. So why am I here? I thought you were in charge while your mother's away. Yes. Your point is...? Insurance forms, honey, they need to be signed. (SIGHS) Email me the details. Here we are, David, all dry again. You're an angel. Are you sure you can't stay? Well, if you can fit me in again. Maybe your friend could join us. I don't think so. Or maybe not. BOTH CHUCKLE < Hello? Hey, baby. Hey. How was your secret lover? Not a patch on you. PHONE RINGS, VIBRATES Well, he's very persistent. (GROANS) (SIGHS) Hey, Bianca. Hi. You need to come home. What, now? Something really bad happened today. Like how bad? Well, that detective came to see me, and they wanna look at the salon bank account in case Mum was using it to, you know. Shit. And you have to come home. (SIGHS) Well, there's not really much I can do about this right now. I know, but also, Nana Pat's here. Come on. Oh God, no. Yeah. She's come to help, and she wants to talk to all of us, and she made dinner. Oh God. OK, um, I'll see you soon. What's so terrible? Just... Nana Pat. And that's bad? I will be back. See ya. Bye. LIGHT MUSIC Back home, are ya? Just for now. Mm, never thought you'd last on your own. Who's for seconds? (CLEARS THROAT) Yeah, I-I` Yeah, I guess I could take a little more. That's my boy. How's my great-grandson? Oscar's great. And the hippy slapper? We're discussing custody. Go for the doctor on that slut. This place is a sty. You two should make a bit of effort when you're staying in someone's else's whare. DOOR SHUTS > Hi. Kat. Better late than never. Hello, Nana. (CLEARS THROAT) There's, uh, food ` Nana Pat's lamb hotpot. Oh. I've eaten. Thanks. You know, it's been almost two years since your father passed on. Oh my God. Can't believe that. At least someone remembered, and your mother and I've been discussing a memorial. PHONE RINGS JAUNTY TUNE, VIBRATES Sorry. Hi, Nigella. What's up? It's two years, and I've got everything organised so we have somewhere we can visit and (TEARFULLY) remember Dean. That's a really great idea, Nana. Mm. Mm. Thanks. Matt, Kat, can I talk to you guys for a sec? Now? Yeah, it's important. (SIGHS HEAVILY) She doesn't give a tinker's about her family. Clean up your plate. Yeah. Then after there's bread and butter pud. What is it? What's happened? I lost the money. 1 Are you sure it's OK if I get a ride? Yeah, yeah. Dad said it's fine. I'm putting on some music. OK. BOTH CHUCKLE, CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS Dad! OK, I'm gonna change it. Sorry, but... Yeah. OK. Ooh yeah. Yeah. Turn it up. DUB MUSIC PLAYS, PHONE PINGS Hey, the others wanna hang out. Um... Hey! BOTH LAUGH ALL: # It's time to cut and run. It's time to... TYRES SCREECH # It's time to cut and run. It's time to cut and run. # Oh my God. Get off! Yeah! It's so obvious. So wasted. TRUCK HORN BLARES, GIRLS SCREAM, LAUGH (LAUGHS) TV BEEPS I'll probably drop Libby home after dance so she doesn't have to walk home in the dark. Thanks, Dad. I'll be home a little bit after 10, not too late. I love you guys. Yeah, all good, love. How the hell could you just lose the money? I gave it to Nigella to bank. Nigella the Useless? Jesus! Don't shout at me. Nobody's shouting! DOG BARKS DISTANTLY And` (SIGHS) And how'd she manage to lose it? Well, Nigella was in Starbucks, and she looked in the bag and saw all the money, and she freaked. How much money was it anyway? $18,320. Oh God. Just` What happened? W` Her boyfriend offered to bank the money for her, but then he got mugged on the way there. Well, did he report it to the cops? I don't think so. What, tell the cops he got mugged? Yes. Oh, no, right, maybe not such a great idea. Maybe it's not so terrible, seeing as the cops are looking into the salon right now. So this is a good thing? Still a shitload of cash. So it is a bad thing, but at least Lucas wasn't seriously injured. Who is this Lucas guy? Lucas Griggs. Used to go to Logan Campbell High? What, you know him? Got excluded from year 12 for dealing. (SIGHS) Jesus. You think he took it? DOG BARKS DISTANTLY Where does this Lucas guy live? I can find out. Oi, Nana Pat wants you all to come back in. I was thinking of a cross made up of a hammer and a saw. Why? Oh, he was a builder, but then I thought a nautical theme. Didn't he, like, die at sea? Well, someone had to make a decision, and this is nice and simple, with 'Loving son and father'. 'And husband'. (SCOFFS) To a criminal. She was in business with the wrong person, that's all. You lie down with dogs, and you get fleas. Come on, guys, not in front of Leo. Don't mind about me. Mum did what she had to do to support this family,... Oh, other people manage. ...because Dad was a gambler and a drinker. You're disappointing me, Matthew. I hope you're going to show a bit more respect at the memorial. You can mow the lawn tomorrow, and I'm doing the garden. It's a mess out there. Scuse me. She wants to do some gardening. Yeah, well, gardening's cool. No, babe. Oh shit. Yeah. LIGHT MUSIC SOFTLY: Oh, hi. (SNIFFS, CHUCKLES) Oh, good girls. Yes. Lovely girls. If Nana Pat finds them, she'll kill them. But they're too young to die, babe. I know, I know. Come on. Shh. Shh. LIGHT MUSIC CONTINUES I'll borrow a grow lamp from Chazza. You're gonna love it here, girls. (CHUCKLES) POT THUDS (SIGHS) You OK, babe? They can't stay here forever. Yeah, but when we get the place, there's a garage, and you said the money was gonna be sorted. Yeah. I love you so much, and if I ever kept a secret from you, it would be because I love you so much that I didn't wanna worry you. What kind of secret? Nothing. SOFTLY: Nothing. OK. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) DOOR OPENS LEO: Hey, guys? Are you out there? SOFTLY: We should go out. SOFTLY: Yeah. Nana Pat has some jobs for you. (BLOWS KISS) VEHICLE REVERSING ALARM BEEPS CREAKING Morning. Are you Lucas? What about it? I'm Bianca's sister, from the salon. So? Sorry to hear about what happened ` you getting attacked and robbed in broad daylight. Yeah, pretty shit, eh. Where's the money? I got robbed. We both know that's not true. Dead set. These real big dudes got me from behind` Don't bullshit me. I know you stole it. Yeah? So how come you're here and not the cops? Look, I don't want any trouble. Just gimme the money back, and we'll call it a day. I already told you, I haven't got it. < CAR DOOR OPENS OK. Sorry, my bad. CAR ENGINE STARTS, CUTS OFF Leave the bag, lady. No! I don't think so. I don't wanna hurt you. Well, then gimme the bag. Piss off! Oi, leave her alone. LUCAS AND KAT GRUNT Whoa, whoa. (GRUNTS) TYRES SQUEAL Just lemme go! TYRES SQUEAL Fuck. You shit! ENGINE REVS Shit! Shit! (PANTS) You all right? What was`? What was that all about? PANTS: It was a property dispute. Who the hell are you? Oh, I was just, um` I was just passing. PANTS: You were parked outside my mum's yesterday. (EXHALES HEAVILY) (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) Hi, I'm Jason. Kat. I assume you already know that, since you've been following me. You are a sharp one. You a cop? No, a private investigator. I work for Derwent Insurance. Can you prove it? (PANTS) Is this about my dad's life insurance? Yeah. Great. (CLEARS THROAT) Maybe you can tell me when it's gonna come through. Well, in cases like this, with no body, it's, um` The coroner's ruling was quite clear it was an accident. And the company did accept that. Then your mother was arrested for fraud-related charges. So? (SCOFFS) You can see how that looks. Yeah, like your company's trying to worm its way out. Look, (SIGHS) I sympathise, I really do, but, uh, there's also this. What am I s'posed to be looking at? It was, uh, taken down at the marina. LOW, UNSETTLED MUSIC INSECTS CHIRP That could be anyone. < Could be your father. When was it taken? Couple of weeks ago. Then it can't be. So you haven't heard from him? No. What about your mum? How could she? My father died two years ago (VOICE BREAKS) in a boating accident. Just keep it, just in case it jogs someone's memory. If this is just a tactic to avoid paying up, it stinks. My father is not alive. < CAR DOOR OPENS, SHUTS GRUNTING LIGHT MUSIC (GRUNTS SOFTLY) RATTLING, CLATTERING > Hello? Who's there? I'm warning ya, I've watched a lotta Bruce Lee movies. RATTLING > EXPECTANT MUSIC Oh, (CHUCKLES) Leo, man. Almost crapped myself. Sorry, bro. Anyway, I'll leave you to it. Hang on, bro. Yo. What you got there? Where? In your hand. Oh, (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) nothing, bro. Don't worry about it. Show me. Why do you have to go and do that for? My girls don't deserve that. Dude, you're gonna burn them anyway. When they're ready. Yeah, I wasn't gonna smoke it. Dope makes you stupid. I was just gonna sell it. And you think that makes it better? Come on, dude, you know with Mum away it's seriously affecting my cash flow. Hey, we're all in the same boat here. Hand it over. OK, how about a business proposition? You grow; I sell. (SCOFFS) No way, this is strictly for personal use. That way you could grow the business. See what I did there? 'Grow the business?' (CHUCKLES) Forget about it, Leo. Fine. Spoilsport. Oi. What? And the other hand. (SIGHS) But, hey, when Nana Pat finds them, they'll be compost anyway. LOW, UNSETTLED MUSIC (KNOCKS) Oh, you are here. Hey, I, uh, told Jacobs you were, so, yeah, I was right. What can I do for you, Nathan? Look, I know you've had a difficult time of it lately, so if you need anyone to help out, you know, pick up the slack... I think I'm on top of it. Thanks. Glad to hear it. Well, I'll leave you to it. OK. Do you want this...? Yeah, thanks. OK. Oh, it could be anyone. That's what I told him. This insurance investigator guy? Yeah. I mean, you don't think Dad could be alive? Do you think Dad would put us through that kind of pain and fake his own death? No. Of course not. Hey, guys. How's it goin'? (SIGHS) Not so great, actually. Did you get the money back? No. Oh my God, Mum will be so upset, and we could lose the house, and` Look, I know the house is really important to you... Oh my God. We'll try and work something out. Maybe I could lend you some money. N-No, no, but I need to show the bank that I have regular income that keeps on being regular. Yeah, it's a bit of a bummer. LIGHT MUSIC Don't look at me like that. We're being sympathetic. Yeah, I know, but it doesn't make it any better. (SIGHS) Poor Bianca. I just love this place so much. Yeah, me too. And it's all gone wrong, and it's all my fault. Eh? I hate having secrets from you, and it's not fair of Matt and Kat to think I can. What kind of secrets? M-Mum isn't innocent. She is a sort of criminal. Yeah, but not like a bad one. I was supposed to bank some of the money for her, but I lost it, and the cops are looking at the salon, so I can't put Mum's money in there, and we're gonna lose the house and your parents' half of the deposit, and I'm` I'm an idiot and a loser and` Hey, hey, hey, hey. You're not a loser. What about an idiot? Never, and I couldn't hate you if I tried. OK. I got faith in us. We'll get through this. We could, um... We could sell our baby. No! No, I couldn't do that to you. Well, I'd do it if we have to. I love you so much it makes my heart burn. (CHUCKLES) BIRDS CHIRP Oh my God. Did you really grow up in a place like this? Yeah, I guess I take it for granted. No, I wasn't meaning to make you feel guilty. Hey, what if they hate me? Trust me. They'll love you just like I do. Ugh. (CHUCKLES) Hope not. BOTH LAUGH Oh, come in, come in. (CHUCKLES) Oh. (SMOOCHES) (SIGHS) Oh, how are you, darling? Hey. (SMOOCHES, CHUCKLES) Good. Good to see you. Oh, it is lovely to meet you. (CLEARS THROAT) Andrew is very bad for not bringing you around sooner. (CHUCKLES) Oh, well, it hasn't been all that long. I know, I know ` whirlwind romance. (CHUCKLES) (CHUCKLES) Where's Dad? Uh, there is a money market in crisis somewhere, (CHUCKLES) but he won't be long. Oh, Andrew said you were clever and accomplished, but he didn't mention beautiful. Oh, thank you. (CHUCKLES) (CHUCKLES) Oh, and your mother ` couldn't believe it. Locking up a widow with a 14-year-old at home is appalling, but don't you worry; Andrew will take care of it. I know I'm biased, but he really is quite good. Well, I think so. (CHUCKLES) > (CHUCKLES) Ah, here he is now. 'Bout time. > Sorry, Chinese (SIGHS) do like to (SLOWS) warble on. Uh, David, this is Kat. Kat ` Andrew's father, David. > CURIOUS MUSIC Very pleased to meet you, David. Likewise. Uh, release the poor girl, David. CHUCKLING Um, let's go outside for some drinks and nibbles, shall we? > Yeah. Yeah, I'll crack open the bubbles. Ah, marvellous. Fantastic idea. Come on. I am sorry we had to cancel last night. Blame this one. Guilty. There's always some urgent business to attend to, but fortunately, he's quite good at it, so I forgive him. < Thank you, honey. < (CHUCKLES) So is that the small talk outta the way? Mm! Andrew! < Excuse me? Because I'd like to move on to the main item on the agenda. I asked Kat to marry me, and she said yes. Oh! (CHUCKLES) (CHUCKLES) CHUCKLES: Oh my goodness! Oh, that is wonderful news. Oh, congratulations. (CHUCKLES) Thank you. Oh. (SIGHS, CHUCKLES) (SMOOCHES) Oh, I dunno why I'm so shocked; (CHUCKLES) you're obviously in love. Well done. Well done. (CHUCKLES) (SIGHS) Oh! Oh, what a sook. I'm gonna get some tissues. (CHUCKLES) > Aw. You, make yourself useful; open some (CHUCKLES) more champagne. > I hear and obey. (SIGHS) Oh. (CHUCKLES) Thank you. Oh. (SIGHS) RELAXED PIANO MUSIC PLAYS (CHUCKLES) Congratulations. It` It was you. Yes. Yeah. > That's awkward. I was there strictly in a professional capacity. World's oldest profession? No, it was a legal thing. Well, that's a relief, especially if you're marrying my son. (SCOFFS) Something dodgy going on there? No, not at all. RELAXED PIANO MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING So, you gonna say anything? Not if you don't. Nah. We have an agreement, then. (CHUCKLES) GLASSES CLINK There we are, the good stuff. What did you say your surname was again? Uh, Rafferty. Oh God, no, hide the silver; lock up the booze; (IRISH ACCENT) the Irish are here. David. LAUGHTER DOOR SHUTS, KEYS JINGLE KEYS CLATTER That went pretty well. Yeah. I really like your mum. < (CHUCKLES GENTLY) Was it the Irish jokes? NON-COMMITTALLY: Yeah. < Look, I know Dad can be a blowhard, but he's OK, really, and very loyal. Right. < And he adores Mum. So your mum and dad's relationship's pretty solid, then. God, yes. Think I was the only kid in high school whose parents were still together. I want a marriage like theirs, and to grow old with yo` No offense, but talkin' about your parents is... not really much of a turn-on. Oh, what do you wanna talk about, then? Hmm. No talking. (CHUCKLES) The thing is ` it's not what you learn, it's where you learn it. Mm. Rubbish. Fact. The connections you make at high school affect your whole future. Makes sense. It's just with Mum inside, I don't know how I'm gonna afford the school fees necessary to pay for my future. Lovely speech, dear, but I'm afraid it's wasted on me. The farm barely pays its way. But if I can't afford the fees, I'll have to go to a state school where there are teachers like Matt. Come on, sis, help me out. 20 grand ` money well spent. I'd love to help, but me and Tane can't even afford to buy our house. It's not about you, is it? Don't be mean! FOOTSTEPS RECEDE > Bit sensitive, isn't she? Oh, I've gotta go and fill up the bath. That bathroom was your father's last renovation. And it's still not finished. Nana Pat? > Hmm? > How long are you staying for? As long as I'm needed. (SIGHS) Hey, bro. Yo. That, um, business proposition you mentioned? Oh, yeah. You serious? Absolutely, yeah. FURTIVE MUSIC What am I lookin' at? Right in front of you. What's that? The shed. What's in it? Well, not much. That's why it's perfect for a horticultural enterprise. Why do most urban dope growers get busted? Because they're thick as shit. And because of the spike in the power bill caused by the grow lamps, but in this case it'll just look like Bianca's been doing more hair. When it comes to business, you've gotta do your research. You know how you said you might be able to help? I did. < Were you serious about that? Yeah. Um, I can see you've got some empty chairs. I-I know. Kylie, the other babe, moved to Brisbane. She really likes it over there. Well,... (CHUCKLES) ...who doesn't love Queensland? Yeah. (CHUCKLES) So the business is yours? The lease is in my name, yeah. Well, I could consider buying in. Really? Yeah, I'm looking to diversify, and if a little extra would help... Oh God, it would so help. Great. Can I check the lease, take a look around the place? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what about Bianca? She can't know. Sorry, bro, but she'll blab. Well, if we get busted, she'll get in the shit. Well, my business plan does have a contingency for legals. I'll just say it was all me. I mean, I'm only 14. Thanks to the bleeding-heart liberals, the worst I'll get is a slap on the wrist. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) And there's parking out here. Great. Shh, shh. And, uh, is this shed yours? Yeah, it's just got some junk in there at the moment. DOOR THUDS DOOR THUDS REPEATEDLY Sorry, it's a bit stuck. Well, storage is always an (STRAINS) issue. DOOR RATTLES Good to know. I'll get Tane to have a look at it. Yeah, sure. LOCK CLICKS (MOUTHS) FURTIVE MUSIC CONTINUES DOOR RATTLES, SQUEAKING Well, I know it's not flash or anything. As I say, potential. (CHUCKLES) I would love to be in business with you, Bianca. Really? CHUCKLES: Yes. Yes! (CHUCKLES) Um, OK, you, uh, got a...? Oh. FURTIVE MUSIC CONTINUES (CHUCKLES) All right. (CHUCKLES) How does that look? (GASPS) That's incredible. (CHUCKLES) Well, I believe in investing in people, and we are family. I feel so bad that I don't actually remember you. Oh, I came to stay when I was younger. You were just a wee tot. You were gorgeous` are gorgeous. (CHUCKLES) Oh, thanks. (CHUCKLES) So is there anyone else you need to discuss this with? My sister, Kat; She's a lawyer. Oh, lawyers ` fine print. For me, it's all about trust. Th` There's Mum. Do you really want to bother her right now? Maybe not, and it probably would be good to set up a separate bank account. Easy-peasy. (CHUCKLES GENTLY) And could some of the money maybe go in quite soon? Are we talking lump sum or regular payments? Regular would be fantastic. Then we have a deal. (SQUEALS SOFTLY) (CHUCKLES) I'll send a contract to you later today. OK. OK. See ya. Bye. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) FURTIVE MUSIC CONTINUES LIGHT SCRAPING, RATTLING CHUCKLES: Yeah. So whaddaya say? Well, first thing we need is a better lock. So, how were the in-laws? < DOOR SHUTS I really like Andrew's mum. Well, what about the dad? Crusty old codger? Uh, he was a bit looser than I expected. Swinger? Pisshead? Hey, about the Hanky Panky, I` I don't think I can be involved any more. Hmm, strange segue from your future father-in-law. Oh, no, (CHUCKLES GENTLY) it's got nothing to do with him. It's just work and all that. That's fine with me, but bags not telling Mum about the money going missing. Oh, that's mature (!) All of the money ` gone?! Yeah. Bianca was going to bank it. Hang on. She was gonna bank it all at once? What's wrong with that? You don't deposit amounts over 10 grand; it draws attention. (SIGHS) Actually, the` the salon has drawn attention already from Turner. (SIGHS) God. Poor Bianca. Maybe we can help pay back the deposit or something? Or she could just` she could try again when we get the insurance money. Nana Pat says it's full steam ahead on the memorial? Yeah, it's on Friday. I wish you could come. Nana Pat's been to see you? SCOFFS: Yeah. She had to rub it in, let me know she cares about her son even if I don't. (CHUCKLES DRILY) Look, about Dad ` (SIGHS) y-you've never heard from him, have you? You mean through a clairvoyant? GENTLE CHATTER Could this be Dad? I s'pose it could. It was taken a couple of weeks ago. Well, then it's not. How could it be? DOOR ALARM BUZZES > GENTLE CHATTER Tell me what's going on. DOOR SHUTS > The insurance company aren't convinced Dad's dead. They're looking into it. They told me that` And now, apparently, they've reconsidered, because of... (SIGHS HEAVILY) Bugger. (SIGHS) LOW, POIGNANT MUSIC Of course your father is dead,... and there's not a day that goes by... Dean was no saint, but... do you think he would leave us believing he was dead if he wasn't? I'm sorry, Mum. I just had` I don't even know how you could suggest it, and there'd be no point in having a memorial if he was still alive, would there? (SIGHS) GENTLE CHATTER POIGNANT MUSIC CONTINUES (SIGHS) < FOOTSTEPS CRUNCH UNSETTLED MUSIC MUSIC CONTINUES BIRDS SQUAWK Nice day for it. (EXHALES HEAVILY) (SIGHS) You looking for anyone in particular? Yeah. My dad. I thought I'd pop round for a cuppa tea, and then we'd sail off to, I dunno, Tahiti (!) Thanks to you, I've upset my mum, and you can take your ridiculous theory and shove it. Stop following me. Don't flatter yourself. I'm looking for a mate of your dad's ` dodgy bastard. Thought he might know something. (SCOFFS) Give it up, OK? BIRDS SQUAWK UNSETTLED MUSIC CONTINUES GENTLE THUDDING Ooh, it's kind of crowded in here. < BIANCA: It won't be for long. What's that, babe? It's a contract... from my investor, the lady I told you 'bout ` Imogen. Wow. You understand all of that? Uh, I know the little sticky bits are where you have to sign. Maybe I should call Kat, but then she'd think I was dumb. You're amazing. I miss Mum, you know ` calling in for a cuppa, having a laugh about the clients. Yeah. Except the clients who weren't real clients. CHUCKLES: Yes. Still pretty out there, you know, the old ghost clients. (SPOOKILY) Ooh! (CHUCKLES GENTLY) I guess Mum must've thought I was stupid too. Nah, and you've got to be pretty smart to get yourself an investor. (CHUCKLES) All under control? Yeah, I think so. I, uh, have to step out for a few hours. It's my father's memorial. I want you to know you have my full support, naturally. Thank you. But it would be remiss of me not to point out your billables are down ` significantly. Right, yes, I'm` I'm getting on top of that, and I'll be back to normal by next month. Glad to hear it. Oh, and I should also mention ` Nathan's being made an associate. Oh, right. But we're all a team here, so business as usual. Yeah. FOOTSTEPS RECEDE > Congratulations. Hmm? Oh. What can I say? Mm, except, uh, awesome (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) and how, you know, you get what you work for. Oh, definitely. Mm. You have a great, uh, family thing. Thanks. READS: 'Surely goodness and loving kindness will be with me all the days of my life, 'and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.' Amen. Amen. Dean Francis Rafferty... was a man who loved life and embraced it. VEHICLE DOOR SHUTS Mum! Oh my God, Mum! Surprise. Did you get her out for this? (SIGHS) I can't believe it. (CHUCKLES) Oh, sweetheart. Hello, darling. You're here! Oh! Hi, love. Thank this one ` compassionate request. (SIGHS) My, my, how the mighty have fallen. Hello, Pat. Actually, I was just saying a few words. Don't let me hold you up. Well, I was going to say a whole lot more, but you've put me off. Sorry. But this is a song I used to sing to Dean when he was a wee boy. He... TEARFULLY: He wouldn't go to sleep without it. # I've been a wild rover # for many's a year, # and I've spent all my money # on whiskey and beer. < (CONTINUES SINGING) Sounds like your dad all right. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) < # ...to my native shore. < # I never will... I'm sorry for getting snippy with you. It's all right. Probably shouldn't have mentioned it. < (CONTINUES SINGING) Those last few weeks Dean wasn't himself. He was in trouble and he... mentioned the life insurance. BIRDS CHIRP You don't think he`? You don't think he would've... taken his own life? Made it look like an accident so we could collect, which means he was thinking about us, you kids. # Never more will I play the wild rover, # no, never, no more. # BIRDS CHIRP Oh wow, that's Imogen. Your investor? Yeah. That's so nice of her. Oh my God. You remember Imogen? In memory of my son,... > Vaguely. ....Dean Francis Rafferty. (SCOFFS) Why am I not surprised? (CHUCKLES DRILY) What are you doing here? Why shouldn't I be here? I loved him. You have such a nerve` Dean loved me, Donna, not you. What the fuck? It's the truth. He never loved you. He did. You little tart! ALL TALK AT ONCE Please! KIDS: Mum! SMACK! ALL TALK AT ONCE Stop it! Get off, Mum! It's not worth it. GRUNTING, YELLING He did love me! THUD! Oh, how dare you do this in front of my kids! Can I just say goodbye to my children? Righto, let's go. Don't listen to her. She's always been a liar. Take good care of everybody! NANA PAT: You can leave! Or I'll kick your arse from here to Tipperary. VEHICLE DOOR SHUTS TEARFULLY: I'm just glad I could be here. Your son was a wonderful man. (SNIFFLES) < ENGINE STARTS Did you know about this? No. Wh... Wow. That was, uh, seriously freaky. I know. BRIGHT MUSIC