MERRY MUSIC 'JINGLE BELLS' CAPTIONS BY JESSICA BOELL. WWW.ABLE.CO.NZ CAPTIONS WERE MADE POSSIBLE WITH FUNDING FROM NZ ON AIR. COPYRIGHT ABLE 2016 'JINGLE BELLS' CONTINUES SNOW. IT NEVER SNOWS IN NEW YORK IN TIME FOR CHRISTMAS. MUSIC CONTINUES SMASH! ALARM BELL RINGS (TURNS ALARM OFF) (SIGHS) I DON'T NEED A THERAPIST TO TELL ME WHAT THAT ONE MEANT. FESTIVE MUSIC MUSIC CONTINUES CALM MUSIC WHEN IS THE BUILDING INSPECTOR STOPPING BY? THE INSPECTOR WILL BE HERE TOMORROW AT 10, JUST LIKE I TOLD YOU THIS MORNING. SORRY. DID WE PAY THESE CARPENTERS? YOU CAN ASK ME AS MANY QUESTIONS AS YOU WANT; THAT'S NOT GONNA MAKE ME FORGET WHAT WE WERE TALKING ABOUT. WHAT WERE WE TALKING ABOUT? THAT VOLUNTEER, BEN, YOUR NEXT-DOOR-NEIGHBOUR. I'VE SEEN HOW HE LOOKS AT YOU. FIRST OF ALL, YOU'RE EXAGGERATING, AS USUAL. AND SECOND, WE'RE JUST FRIENDS, AND THAT'S ALL WE'LL EVER BE. SARA, YOU'RE WASTING THE BEST YEARS OF YOUR LIFE. COME ON, IT'S BEEN SEVEN YEARS SINCE PETE DIED ` SEVEN YEARS! AND HOW MANY SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS HAVE YOU HAD IN THAT TIME? DEFINE SERIOUS. SARA. YOU'RE 38 YEARS OLD, BUT IN ROMANTIC YEARS, YOU'RE 88. OH, LIL, I APPRECIATE YOUR CONCERN, BUT I ALREADY HAVE A MAN IN MY LIFE ` ONE THAT I LOVE MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WHOLE WORLD. YEAH, THE ONLY PROBLEM IS HE'S 10 YEARS OLD. FESTIVE MUSIC MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC IT'S OPEN! HEY, SPORT. YOU'RE LATE. HEY, DO YOU HAVE ANY ORANGE JUICE? UH, SORRY, FRESH OUT OF OJ. ALL RIGHT, WE DO. I'M JUST GONNA GET A GLASS. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK, OK? HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? JAUNTY MUSIC DO YOU PLAN TO TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED OR IS THERE SOMETHING ELSE YOU WANNA RUN OUT AND GET FROM YOUR APARTMENT? I, UH, FELL OFF THE BUS. NO BIG DEAL. WOW, THAT MUST'VE HURT. IT LOOKS WORSE THAN IT REALLY IS. YOU KNOW, I'M GONNA THROW MY JEANS IN THE WASH SO MY MOM DOESN'T HAVE TO DO IT LATER. OH, SO SHE WON'T FIND OUT YOU'VE BEEN PLAYING TACKLE FOOTBALL AGAIN. HOW'D YOU KNOW? WELL, FOR STARTERS, THERE'S NOT A WHOLE LOT OF GRASS ON THE SIDEWALK WHERE THE BUS DROPS YOU OFF. PROBABLY SHOULD'VE SAID I FELL IN THE SCHOOL YARD, HUH? WELL, I STILL WOULDN'T HAVE BELIEVED YOU, BUT I PROBABLY WOULD'VE PRETENDED A LITTLE BIT LONGER. CAN I ASSUME THERE'S A BRUISE UNDERNEATH THAT PANT LEG? COME ON. YES. PUT SOME ICE ON IT FOR 15 OR 20 MINUTES TO GET THE SWELLING DOWN. ARE YOU GONNA TELL MY MOM? OH, JESS, SHE DID ASK YOU NOT TO PLAY. BUT IT'S JUST FOOTBALL, AND ALL MY FRIENDS ARE PLAYING. AND DON'T SAY, 'IF ALL YOUR FRIENDS JUMPED OFF A BRIDGE, WOULD YOU DO IT?' BECAUSE I'M NOT STUPID; I JUST WANNA PLAY FOOTBALL. SHE'S JUST TRYING TO PROTECT YA. YEAH, I KNOW THAT, BUT I'M 10 YEARS OLD. AND, REALLY, I'M JUST TRYING TO PROTECT HER TOO. ALL RIGHT, SMART ALEC. GO GET CHANGED. LISTEN, BUT MAKE SURE THAT YOU WASH YOUR JEANS BEFORE SHE GETS HOME. OK. ALL RIGHT? TRAFFIC NOISE FRANTIC MUSIC HAVE YOU SEEN THESE FIGURES? KRAMER TOYS IS ALREADY BACK-ORDERED THROUGH NEW YEAR'S WITH THEIR SUPREME-ATRON LINE. NOBODY'S BUYING MORPH MAN! OUR FAMILY HAS BEEN IN THIS BUSINESS FOR OVER 100 YEARS, AND WE'RE GETTING CREAMED BY AN UPSTART! YEAH, DAD, THAT'S WHY I FIRED THE AD AGENCY, AND I PUT ERIN` COME ON IN HERE ` I HIRED ERIN DAVIS TO BE HEAD OF MARKETING. WE HAVE LESS THAN EIGHT WEEKS UNTIL CHRISTMAS. WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THAT WAS ENOUGH TIME TO TURN THIS AROUND? I WOULD SAY MY SON HIRED A YES MAN. LOOK, DAD, WE HAVE A NEW IDEA, OR AT LEAST THE BROAD STROKES OF AN IDEA. IN A FEW DAYS WE'RE GONNA BE READY TO LAY OUT THE WHOLE AD CAMPAIGN FOR YOU. ALL RIGHT, WHAT'S THE CONCEPT? I DON'T WANNA SHOW YOU UNTIL WE HAVE THE WHOLE THING WORKED OUT. NO, YOU GET 24 HOURS. BUT IF I DON'T LIKE IT, I'M TAKING OVER THE MARKETING MYSELF. TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS HEY, BEN, WHY DIDN'T YOU EVER ASK MY MOM OUT? WHAT? LIKE ON A DATE? YEAH. WE'RE JUST FRIENDS. YEAH, BUT BOYFRIENDS AND GIRLFRIENDS ARE FRIENDS, AREN'T THEY? THAT'S TRUE. ANYWAY, I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND AT THE MOMENT. OH YEAH, AMBER? SHE'S CUTE AND ALL, BUT SHE CAN BE A LITTLE STUCK-UP. WHOA, WHAT? AMBER'S VERY NICE ONCE YOU GET TO KNOW HER. OK, SHE CAN BE STUCK-UP SOMETIMES. THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT. YOU'RE UNBELIEVABLE. ALL RIGHT, WE'RE ALL CLIPPED UP. YEAH? YEAH. RIGHT, LET'S DO IT. ALL RIGHT, SAFETY PIN. BOTH: NINE, EIGHT, SEVEN, SIX, FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO, ONE! WHOOSH! BOTH LAUGH YES! CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S ALMOST THANKSGIVING. I LOVE INDIAN SUMMER IN NEW YORK. YEAH, WELL, ENJOY IT WHILE IT LASTS. WHAT, IT'S ONLY 42 DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS? OH, DON'T REMIND ME. MY PARENTS WANT JESSE AND ME TO COME TO ARIZONA FOR THE HOLIDAYS. REALLY? YOU GONNA GO? ARE YOU KIDDING?! I'D NEVER HEAR THE END OF IT FROM JESSE. HE LIKES EVERYTHING JUST THE WAY IT'S BEEN. SOMETIMES A LITTLE CHANGE IS GOOD. DID YOU MAKE OTHER PLANS? ARE YOU KIDDING? IT'S OK IF YOU DO. WOULDN'T HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY. NEITHER WOULD JESSE. HE'S GOT THE WHOLE HOLIDAY PLANNED OUT LIKE A ROAD MAP. TELL ME ABOUT IT. (CHUCKLES) DECEMBER 1ST HE GETS OUT HIS ADVENT CALENDAR, THEN BOOM, THE THREE OF US GO SHOPPING FOR OUR CHRISTMAS TREES. DECEMBER 3RD WE DECORATE. YEAH, THEN IT'S CLEAR SAILING RIGHT TO CHRISTMAS EVE. CLEAN UP AFTER DINNER AT THE CENTRE. WE GO TO MIDNIGHT MASS, WE'RE HOME FOR COOKIES, AND JESSE LEAPS INTO BED SO THAT SANTA DOESN'T PASS HIM BY. YOU KNOW, HE TOLD ME HE DOESN'T BELIEVE IN SANTA ANY MORE. WELL, MAYBE, BUT I DON'T THINK HE'S GONNA TAKE ANY CHANCES. WE'RE VERY LUCKY TO HAVE YOU IN OUR LIVES. I'M THE LUCKY ONE. HEY! HEY! COME ON, GIVE ME THAT! (CHUCKLES) YES! OK, SO, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, OK, SO, SO WE DON'T PITCH TO THE KIDS. WE PITCH TO THE PARENTS AND GRANDPARENTS WHO MAKE THE LAST-MINUTE PURCHASING DECISIONS. FOCUS ON THE IMAGE OF THE COMPANY NOT THE IMAGE OF THE TOY. WE FOCUS ON TOYCO AS THE COMPANY WITH HEART THAT AMERICANS HAVE TRUSTED FOR YEARS. RIGHT, RIGHT, BUT HOW DO WE GET THE MESSAGE OUT BEFORE CHRISTMAS? UH, PARENTS, GRANDPARENTS, FAMILY, CHRISTMASES. FAMILY VALUES. WHAT KIDS REALLY WANT FOR CHRISTMAS. ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS. (CHUCKLES) ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS. LAUGHS: THAT'S WHAT IT IS. WE'LL DO A CONTEST. YES! UPBEAT MUSIC SORRY, DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THAT. IT'S OK. TAKE YOUR TIME. TAKE YOUR TIME. MUSIC CONTINUES I'M DONE. ALL RIGHT. OK, LAST PART OF THE TEST. NAME TWO USES FOR THE BOWLINE KNOT. SAILING AND CLIMBING. SAILING AND CLIMBING. ALL RIGHT. AND THE BOWLINE KNOT IS ALSO KNOWN AS THE WHAT? THE RESCUE KNOT. JESSE ARMSTRONG, YOU'VE JUST EARNED YOUR PIONEERING MERIT BADGE! ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT! APPLAUSE OK, THAT'S IT FOR TONIGHT, EVERYBODY. TAKE YOUR CHAIRS OVER THERE, THANKS. GOOD JOB. GREAT JOB. HIGH FIVE. WE'LL SEE YOU GUYS LATER ON. GOOD JOB. GOOD JOB, EVERYBODY. MOM, I DID IT! I GOT MY BADGE! WAS THERE EVER ANY DOUBT? WELL, I THINK BEN WAS A LITTLE NERVOUS. IT WAS A NAIL-BITER. I'VE AN IDEA. LET'S MAKE A NIGHT OUT OF IT. WE'LL GO TO THE STARLIGHT PALACE FOR DINNER, AND THEN AFTER THAT WE'LL DO A COUPLE OF GAMES OF BOWLING. PIZZA, SMELLY BOWLING SHOES ` LEAD THE WAY. YES! UPBEAT MUSIC THAT'S GONNA BE GOOD. WHOA! ALL RIGHT, JESS! YEAH! ALL RIGHT! THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. ALL RIGHT. SARA, LISTEN. TRY TO BUILD ON WHAT YOU DID LAST TIME. I GOT TWO PINS LAST TIME. YEAH, BUT THAT'S DOUBLE WHAT YOU GOT BEFORE. YOU'RE NOT HELPING. DRUM ROLL FOR SARA ARMSTRONG. SHE'S COMING UP. OOH. OOH. ALL RIGHT. THAT'S OK, SHAKE IT OFF. MOM, IT'S NOT FAIR IF I BEAT YOU BY MORE THAN 100 PINS. CAN I JUST QUIT NOW? NO. ALL RIGHT. THIS IS IT. ALL RIGHT. TRY TO HIT A PIN. AND DRUM ROLL. OK, HERE WE GO. SMASH! YES! WHO'S BUYING DINNER? YOU ARE. THERE YOU GO. SENTIMENTAL MUSIC WHERE'S SARA? BOWLING WITH BEN AND JESSE. SHE TOOK THE NIGHT OFF? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I'M LOOKING FOR PIGS FLYING OVER THE BLUE MOON. WHO'S THAT? MR GIDEON. HE OWNS THE BUILDING. WHY DO YOU THINK HE'S HERE? I DON'T KNOW, BUT I BET IT ISN'T GOOD. OH. MWAH, LOVE YOU. LOVE YOU TOO. MOM? HUH? CAN I ASK YOU A QUESTION? COURSE. WHAT IS LOVE? WELL, I KNOW WHAT IT IS BETWEEN A MOM AND SON, LIKE YOU AND ME. WHAT IS IT BETWEEN A MOM AND A DAD? WHERE'S THIS COMING FROM? I DUNNO. I'VE JUST BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT. WELL, YOUR DAD USED TO SAY LOVE'S NOT ABOUT SPARKS. HE SAID IT'S A FEELING THAT YOU'RE NOT COMPLETE UNLESS YOU'RE WITH THE PERSON YOU LOVE. AND THAT'S THE WAY YOUR DAD MADE ME FEEL ` COMPLETE. YOU AND DAD MUST HAVE LOVED EACH OTHER A LOT, HUH. WE DID. SENTIMENTAL MUSIC CONTINUES PHONE RINGS HEY, LIL. SARA, I'M SORRY TO CALL YOU SO LATE. IT'S NO PROBLEM. WHAT'S UP? MR GIDEON CAME BY AFTER THE DINNER RUSH. SARA, HE SAID SOMEBODY'S MADE AN OFFER ON THE PROPERTY. KNOCK AT DOOR IT'S OPEN. HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I THOUGHT YOU WERE TIED UP AT WORK ALL NIGHT. I KNOW, I THOUGHT I WOULD BE, BUT THE DEPOSITION WAS QUICKER THAN I ANTICIPATED, SO I THOUGHT I'D STOP BY ON MY WAY HOME. HONESTLY, I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D BE HERE. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TIME YOU FINISH WITH THOSE RANGER KIDS, ROWING BOATS OR BUILDING FORTS OR WHATEVER IT IS YOU GUYS DO. WELL, WE'RE USUALLY OVER BY 5. HEY, WANT SOME WINE? YEAH. HEY, JESSE FINALLY GOT HIS PIONEERING BADGE. OH. WE WENT OUT FOR SOME PIZZA AND BOWLING TO CELEBRATE. THAT'S GREAT. HEY, WE SHOULD GO BOWLING SOMETIME. YOU KNOW, THERE'S A LOT OF THINGS I CONSIDER FUN; BOWLING'S NOT ONE OF THEM. REALLY? UH-UH. COME ON! IT'LL BE A BLAST. WE'LL GET SILLY; WE'LL GET SOME HOT DOGS AND SOME BEER AND WE'LL THROW SOME GUTTER BALLS. I JUST WANNA WARN YOU, UM, THAT I'M A RINGER AND I WILL TAKE YOU DOWNTOWN TO CHINA TOWN. IT'S OK, I THINK I'LL PASS. SO WHAT IS THIS? WHAT'RE YOU WORKING ON? OH, THAT. THAT'S THE PIECE ON THE HARLEM FARMERS MARKET. OH. DID YOU EVER, UH, CALL THE AGENT I TOLD YOU ABOUT? OH, NO, NOT YET. I DON'T WANNA SHOW ANYONE MY NOVEL UNTIL IT'S FINISHED. THE NOVEL IS DEAD. ALL MY FRIENDS IN PUBLISHING SAY THERE'S NO MONEY IN IT. HONESTLY, BEN, YOU'RE SUCH A GOOD WRITER. YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T WASTE YOUR LIFE WITH THIS COMMUNITY NEWSPAPER. I MEAN, IF THE CIRCULATION GETS ANY LOWER, THEY'RE GONNA HAVE TO PAY YOU IN PEANUTS. You don't have a girlfriend. You don't need a lot of calls or text. You don't have a girlfriend. You don't need a lot of calls or text. You need data ` for dating sites, like Honey Badger. (LAUGHS) You do have a girlfriend. You need less data and more calls ` lovey-dovey calls. # You make me... # You don't have a girlfriend again. She won't return your calls. You need more text. Things change. Now your Prepay can too. Get more of what you need and less of what you don't with Vodafone My Flex Prepay. HORNS BLARE, PEOPLE CALL OUT HE CAN'T DO THIS. MR GIDEON LEASED US THIS PLACE FOR 10 YEARS. WE STILL HAVE SIX YEARS LEFT ON THIS LEASE. HE CAN'T SELL IT. HE CAN. HE EVEN SHOWED ME THE PLACE ON THE LEASE WHERE IT SAYS HE CAN. IT'S IN THE MIDDLE ON PAGE THREE. IF HE GETS AN OFFER AND WE DON'T BUY IT FOR THE $750,000 WE AGREE TO, HE CAN GIVE US A SIX MONTHS' NOTICE. WHAT?! WHY DIDN'T THE ATTORNEY TELL US ABOUT THIS? I GUESS HE THOUGHT MR GIDEON WOULDN'T SELL IT OUT FROM UNDER US. AND IF THERE IS A NEW OWNER, HE MAKES THE DECISION WHAT HAPPENS TO THE COMMUNITY CENTRE. WE'LL TALK TO THEM. WE'LL TELL THEM HOW IMPORTANT THE CENTRE IS TO THE NEIGHBOURHOOD. IT'S A DEVELOPMENT COMPANY. I CALLED THEM FIRST THING THIS MORNING. THEY DON'T TAKE RENTERS ON. THEY BUILD CO-OPS AND SKYSCRAPERS. WE'LL CALL NYPD. THEY HELPED US OPEN THIS PLACE AFTER PETER DIED, AND MAYBE THEY CAN HELP US RAISE THE MONEY TO BUY THE PROPERTY OURSELVES. THAT'S A LOT OF MONEY, SARA. AND A LOT OF PEOPLE OUT ON THE STREET WITH NO FOOD, AND A LOT OF KIDS WITH NOWHERE TO GO AFTER SCHOOL. THE IMPOSSIBLE WE DO EVERY DAY. MIRACLES TAKE A LITTLE LONGER. WELL, THEN WE BETTER GET CALLING. COME ON. I DON'T SEE WHY WE CAN'T LAUNCH THIS NEW ONE OFF THE ROOF. REALLY? WELL, BECAUSE WHAT COMES UP MUST COME DOWN, AND WE REALLY DON'T WANT IT TO COME DOWN ON SOMEBODY'S WINDSHIELD. OH. TV: AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR KIDS NEWS. HEY, KIDS! I'M YOUR HOST, TYLER BRANDON, AND I'M HERE WITH TOYCO CEO ARTHUR NELSON, WHO HAS A VERY SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT THIS YEAR'S CHRISTMAS AD CAMPAIGN. FOR ALL YOU KIDS WATCHING AT HOME, TOYCO IS THE COMPANY WHO BROUGHT YOU MORPH MAN. MORPH MAN'S LAME. SO, ARTHUR, TELL THE KIDS AND US ABOUT THIS CONTEST. WELL, THIS YEAR WE ARE LAUNCHING THE FIRST ANNUAL 'ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS' CONTEST, OPEN TO CHILDREN 5 TO 12 YEARS OLD. YOU JUST SEND A VIDEO TELLING AMERICA WHAT YOU WANT MOST IN THE WORLD, AND ONE LUCKY BOY OR GIRL WILL GET HIS CHRISTMAS WISH FULFILLED. SO YOU HEARD THE MAN, KIDS. SEND YOUR ENTRY TO THE ADDRESS LISTED ON THE SCREEN, BUT HURRY, COS THE CONTEST ONLY LASTS` THAT'S ENOUGH TV. I NEED TO ENTER THAT CONTEST. WA-WA-WAIT. I THOUGHT YOU SAID THAT MORPH MAN WAS LAME, AND NOW YOU WANT TO ENTER A CONTEST TO WIN IT? BEN, THE PRIZE ISN'T THE TOY; IT'S WHAT YOU ASK FOR. I'M GONNA ASK TOYCO TO FIND MY MOM A HUSBAND. YOU'RE GONNA DO WHAT? I'M GONNA ASK TOYCO TO FIND MY MOM A HUSBAND FOR CHRISTMAS. JESSE, THE TOY COMPANY CAN'T FIND SOMEONE A HUSBAND. BUT SHE NEEDS MORE IN HER LIFE THAN JUST ME. SHE NEEDS TO FEEL COMPLETE AGAIN, BEN. THANK YOU SO MUCH, SIR. I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW MUCH I APPRECIATE YOUR HELP. TAKE CARE. HOW'D YOU DO? $30,000. HOW 'BOUT YOU? 24. WITH THE $100,000 THE POLICE DEPARTMENT THINKS THEY CAN GIVE US, THAT'S JUST OVER 150. NOT BAD FOR THE FIRST DAY. WE'RE STILL $600,000 SHORT. WELL, IF THE PROPERTY COMPANY WANTS TO CLOSE BY DECEMBER 1ST LIKE MR GIDEON SAYS, THAT'S THREE WEEKS, 21 DAYS ` THAT'S JUST A LITTLE UNDER $30,000 A DAY. WE'VE GONE TO ALL THE OBVIOUS PLACES ALREADY. THEN WE HAVE TO GO TO THE NOT-SO-OBVIOUS PLACES. YOU KNOW, WE DID PRETTY WELL WITH THAT BAKE SALE LAST YEAR. WHAT? YOU'VE GOT A RECIPE FOR A THOUSAND-DOLLAR BROWNIE (?) MY MOM IS SMART, PRETTY AND FUNNY, AND ANY GUY WOULD BE REALLY LUCKY TO HAVE HER. SO THANKS SO MUCH, AND EVEN IF I DON'T WIN, GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR CONTEST. SO IM' EITHER GOING TO DO PHOTOSYNTHESIS OR FUEL CELLS. I'M KINDA LEANING TOWARD DOING FUEL CELLS BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, PHOTOSYNTHESIS HAS BEEN DONE TO DEATH. LAST YEAR, LESTER DORFMAN GOT FIRST PRIZE JUST FOR GROWING A GERANIUM IN A POT. WHAT DO YOU THINK? MOM? ARE YOU LISTENING? (INHALES) I'M SORRY, SWEETIE. WHAT WERE SAYING? YOU SAID YOU'D HELP ME WITH MY SCIENCE PROJECT, REMEMBER? COURSE. UM, DID YOU HAVE ANYTHING IN MIND THAT YOU WANTED TO DO? MOM, ARE YOU OK? I'M SORRY, BABY. IT WAS` IT WAS A TOUGH DAY DOWN AT THE CENTRE. EAT THAT CARROT. WOULD YOU LIKE TO TALK ABOUT IT? IT'S NOT YOUR JOB TO WORRY ABOUT ME. I HOPE NOT, COS I DON'T GET PAID. WELL, PAID OR NOT, THERE WILL BE NO WORRYING TONIGHT. GOT TOO MUCH TO DO ` YOU'VE GOT HOMEWORK, I'VE GOT LAUNDRY, WE'VE GOT DVDS AND POPCORN. NOT A MINUTE TO SPARE. DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ON TV WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT THE EVIL STEPMOTHER WAS ACTUALLY A CIA OPERATIVE BEING CONTROLLED BY A BRAIN CHIP? HUH? MY BIG GUY. ALWAYS TRYING TO BE THE MAN OF THE HOUSE. I WISH THINGS HAD BEEN DIFFERENT. FOR BOTH OF US. SENTIMENTAL MUSIC BOTH: HEY. OHH, I SAW THAT PIECE ON THE LOCAL ANIMAL SHELTER. IT WAS GOOD. OH, I'M GLAD SOMEONE LIKES IT. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? IT WAS A GREAT STORY. REALLY? YOU DON'T THINK I'M WASTING MY TALENTS? (CHUCKLES) I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO BE A NOVELIST. OH. AMBER SAYS HER FRIENDS IN PUBLISHING SAY THAT THE NOVEL'S DEAD, THAT THERE'S NO MONEY IN FICTION. I DON'T KNOW ABOUT AMBER, BUT I'D LOVE TO READ ANY BOOK YOU WROTE. I KNOW IT SOUNDS LIKE A LOT OF MONEY, BUT WITH $20 MILLION, I COULD BE THE FIRST KID TO GO TO SPACE! ALL RIGHT, NEXT. GO. MY NAME IS GRACE. AND MY NAME IS SHANNON. AND WHAT WE WANT FOR CHRISTMAS... ....MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD... BOTH: ...IS A NEW BLACK MERCEDES. WHISPERS: S-CLASS CONVERTIBLE. S-CLASS CONVERTIBLE. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. AND MERRY CHRISTMAS! TWINS. THEY'RE CUTE. OH, I'M NOT BUYING THE KIDS' MOTHER A NEW MERCEDES. NEXT. COME ON. HI, MY NAME'S JESSE ARMSTRONG, AND I'M 10 YEARS OLD, AND WHAT I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS A HUSBAND FOR MY MOM, SARA ARMSTRONG. MY MOM'S BEEN THROUGH A LOT, AND SHE DESERVES TO HAVE A MAN IN HER LIFE. WELL, A MAN OTHER THAN ME. MY DAD WAS A COP HERE IN NEW YORK, BUT HE WAS KILLED IN THE LINE OF DUTY WHEN I WAS ONLY 2, AND SINCE THEN IT'S JUST BEEN THE TWO OF US. I KNOW IT SEEMS LIKE A REALLY CRAZY THING TO ASK FOR, BUT MY MOM IS SMART AND FUNNY AND PRETTY, AND ANY GUY WOULD BE REALLY LUCKY TO HAVE HER. THANKS SO MUCH, AND EVEN IF I DON'T WIN, GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR CONTEST. (CHUCKLES) NOW THAT KID'S PERFECT. I LIKE HIM TOO, BUT IT'S NOVEMBER. WE CAN'T FIND A HUSBAND FOR THIS KID'S MOM BY CHRISTMAS. WE DON'T HAVE TO. MOST OF THE CONTESTANTS ON THE BACHELOR DON'T END UP GETTING MARRIED, BUT AMERICA DOESN'T CARE; THEY'RE ONLY INTERESTED IN THE ROMANCE AND THE COURTSHIP. THAT WE CAN GIVE THEM. SHE'D BE THE PERFECT AMERICA'S SWEETHEART, MR NELSON. HER HERO COP HUSBAND DIES AND LEAVES HER WITH A TODDLER. PEOPLE WILL EAT THIS UP. I THINK WE'VE GOT A WINNER. PHONE RINGS HEY, JESS, YOUR PHONE'S RINGING. ALL RIGHT, I'LL GET IT. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. PHONE CONTINUES RINGING HELLO? HI, I'M LOOKING FOR JESSE ARMSTRONG. THIS IS JESSE ARMSTRONG. HELLO, JESSE ARMSTRONG. MY NAME IS ERIN DAVIS, AND I'M CALLING FROM THE 'ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS' CONTEST. YEAH? I'VE GOT SOME EXCITING NEWS FOR YOU, JESSE. YOUR ENTRY WAS CHOSEN AS OUR WINNER. OH, YES! NOW, LISTEN, JESSE, DOES YOUR MOTHER KNOW THAT YOU'VE ENTERED OUR CONTEST? WELL, NO. I-I THOUGHT I'D SURPRISE HER. WELL, ACTUALLY, SO DID WE. WHAT ABOUT THE POLICE LADIES AUXILIARY? THEY SPONSORED OUR STUDENT BREAKFAST PROGRAMME. I'M NOT SURE HOW MUCH MORE THEY HAVE TO GIVE. CALL 'EM ANYWAY. WE WERE SUPPOSED TO RAISE $30,000 A DAY. WE'VE BARELY RAISED THAT MUCH THIS WEEK. HI, MRS C. HI. THERE'S SOME REPORTERS OUT HERE. THEY'RE ASKING FOR YOU, SARA. DID YOU CALL THEM? NO. (CHUCKLES) CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR. SARA ARMSTRONG? HELLO, MY NAME IS ERIN DAVIS, AND I'M AN EXECUTIVE AT TOYCO INTERNATIONAL. A TOY COMPANY WANTS TO HELP US? YOU BET WE DO. YOUR INCREDIBLE LITTLE BOY, JESSE, SENT US A TAPE SAYING WHAT A WONDERFUL MOTHER YOU ARE. JESSE, COME OVER HERE WITH US. COME ON. YOU DID THIS, SWEETHEART? YES. SO WE HAVE DECIDED THAT OF THOUSANDS OF ENTRIES, WE'RE AWARDING JESSE FIRST PRIZE IN THE TOYCO 'ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS' CONTEST. YOU WON! ALL CLAMOUR AND AS THE WINNER, WE AT TOYCO INTERNATIONAL WILL HOLD A NATIONWIDE DATING COMPETITION TO FIND YOU THE PERFECT HUSBAND. (STUTTERS) WHAT DID YOU SAY? THE NEW PHASE OF THE TOYCO COMPETITION STARTS TODAY, SO ALL YOU ELIGIBLE BACHELORS OUT THERE, GET YOUR ENTRIES READY. UNDER BREATH: YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, SWEETHEART. JOYFUL MUSIC LOCAL DO-GOODER AND WIDOW OF HERO COP PETER ARMSTRONG, SARA ARMSTRONG, IS NOW THE FACE OF TOYCO INTERNATIONAL'S 'ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS' CAMPAIGN. NOW, SOME OF YOU MAY REMEMBER MS ARMSTRONG TURNED TRAGEDY INTO CHARITY WHEN SHE USED HER HUSBAND'S PENSION TO OPEN A NEIGHBOURHOOD COMMUNITY CENTRE. THE SWITCHBOARD IS LIT UP. PEOPLE ARE CALLING FOR RULES, THEY'RE RECOMMENDING THEIR FATHERS, THEIR BROTHERS, THEIR LOCAL BARBER. LAUGHTER DON'T WORRY, WE'RE GONNA FIND SARA ARMSTRONG THE MAN OF HER DREAMS. OH. (CHUCKLES) THIS IS BETTER THAN WE COULD'VE POSSIBLY IMAGINED. HERE'S TO THE BEST CHRISTMAS SEASON WE'VE EVER HAD. ALL: CHEERS! WHO WILL THE LUCKY WINNER BE? CHANNEL 13 WILL BE WITH YOU EVERY STEP OF THE WAY AS THIS STORY UNFOLDS. (SIGHS) MUFFLED: WAIT! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS. DO YOU THINK THAT I'M SO DESPERATE THAT I NEED A TOY COMPANY TO SEARCH ALL 50 STATES TO FIND ME A DATE?! NOT A DATE, MOM, A HUSBAND. I NEED A LOT OF THINGS, BUT I DON'T NEED A HUSBAND. THE ONLY FRIENDS YOU HAVE ARE THE PEOPLE DOWN AT THE CENTRE, AND THE ONLY TIMES YOU GO OUT ARE WITH ME AND BEN. YOU NEED TO BE COMPLETE AGAIN, MOM. YOU NEED TO BE IN LOVE. NO! I DON'T! I'M NOT UNHAPPY! IT'S JUST... (SIGHS) THINGS HAVE JUST GOTTEN COMPLICATED LATELY. AND WE MIGHT LOSE THE CENTRE. WHAT?! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME? BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO UPSET YOU. I KNOW YOUR HEART IS IN THE RIGHT PLACE, BUT YOU CAN'T JUST MANUFACTURE LOVE. IT'S SOMETHING THAT HAPPENS IN ITS OWN WAY AND IN ITS OWN TIME. MOM, CAN'T YOU JUST GIVE IT A TRY? JAUNTY MUSIC STACK 'EM OVER HERE, BUDDY. WHOA, 10 LITTLE BOYS ARE KINDA LIKE A HURRICANE, AREN'T THEY? HEY, MOM. HI, HONEY. THAT'S PUTTING IT MILDLY. SO HOW GOES THE HUNT FOR A NEW HUSBAND? I HAVEN'T AGREED TO IT YET. IT'S SO RIDICULOUS, A TOY COMPANY WORKING AS MY DATING SERVICE. NOT RIDICULOUS FOR THEM. THEY STAND TO MAKE MILLIONS ON THIS GIMMICK WHETHER YOU FIND SOMEONE OR NOT. HORN BLARES CAN MICHAEL GET YOU ANYTHING? OH, UM, JUST SOME WATER IF YOU HAVE IT. OF COURSE. PELLEGRINO? NO, JUST REGULAR WATER. SO GLAD THAT YOU DECIDED TO BE A PART OF THIS. WE'RE ALL VERY EXCITED. NOW, HAVE LUNCH IN THE EXECUTIVE DINING ROOM, AND YOU'LL MEET MR NELSON AND HIS SON. NOW, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO SPEAK TO ME ABOUT? I'M... NOT COMPLETELY SOLD ON THIS WHOLE THING, AND SO THERE IS SOMETHING THAT I WILL NEED IN RETURN FROM YOU. ANYTHING. NAME IT. $555,000. (CHUCKLES) I'M SORRY, MS ARMSTRONG, BUT WE ARE NOT GOING TO PAY YOU` OH, NO, NO, NO, I'M NOT ASKING YOU TO PAY ME. MY COMMUNITY CENTRE, WHICH I KNOW YOU ALL LOVE FOR THE PUBLICITY VALUE, IS IN DANGER. YOU SEE, OUR LANDLORD WANTS TO SELL IT TO DEVELOPERS, AND WE'VE BEEN TRYING TO RAISE THE MONEY, AND WE'RE $555,000 SHORT. WELL, I KNOW THAT TOYCO MADE NEARLY A BILLION DOLLARS LAST YEAR, AND THE LION'S SHARE OF THE PROFITS ARE MADE OVER THE HOLIDAYS. SO I'M PRETTY SURE THAT YOU'LL BE MAKING A PRETTY PENNY FROM EXPLOITING MY SON AND ME. I HARDLY THINK EXPLOITING IS AN APPROPRIATE WORD. THINK OF IT THIS WAY. IT'S ANOTHER GREAT PIECE OF PUBLICITY FOR TOYCO. IT'LL SHOW HOW CIVIC-MINDED TOYCO IS. DONATE THE MONEY FOR MY COMMUNITY CENTRE AND I WILL GO ALONG WITH AN CRAZY, HARE-BRAINED IDEA YOU HAVE. I CAN'T MAKE A DECISION LIKE THIS ON MY OWN. SHE WANTS WHAT?! $555,000. THAT'S EXTORTION! I'M NOT GONNA GIVE HER A DAMN PENNY. IT'S NOT FOR HER; IT'S FOR THE PLACE WHERE SHE WORKS. THE LANDLORD'S SELLING THE BUILDING OUT FROM UNDER THEM. IT'S THE PETER ARMSTRONG COMMUNITY CENTRE. IT'S NAMED AFTER HER HUSBAND, THE COP WHO WAS KILLED. IT'S A GOOD CHARITY AND IT'S A GREAT PHOTO OP. IT'S A LOT OF MONEY. WELL, WE CAN USE EVERY BIT OF PR WE CAN GET. DO YOU WANNA CANCEL THE 'ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS' CONTEST? JOYFUL MUSIC I'LL HEAD THE SEARCH COMMITTEE, AND ERIN WILL BE IN CHARGE OF PUBLICITY AND THE MAKEOVER. MAKEOVER? YOU KNOW, IT WOULD HELP IF YOU GAVE US SOME SEARCH PARAMETERS. WE'VE ALREADY RECEIVED OVER 8000 VIDEOS, SO ANY WAY YOU CAN NARROW DOWN THAT FIELD WOULD BE A GOOD PLACE TO START. 8000 VIDEOS? (LAUGHS) 8000 MEN WANT TO DATE ME? WELL, THAT'S JUST IN THE LAST TWO DAYS. JUST WAIT. WELL, LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS MAKEOVER. I MEAN, WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE WAY I LOOK NOW? (CHUCKLES) NOTHING. YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL. OUR EXPERTS ARE ONLY TRYING TO ENHANCE YOUR BEAUTY. I PROMISE YOU'LL BE VERY PLEASED WITH THE RESULTS. OK. WELL, NOW I KNOW HOW THE UGLY DUCKLING FELT. NO, THESE ARE ONLY IDEAS. BUT FIRST, LET'S TALK ABOUT OUR SEARCH PARAMETERS. 35 TO 45. SMART, WITTY. HE HAS TO BE GOOD WITH CHILDREN. RIGHT. WELL, WHAT ABOUT LOOKS? CHUCKLES: I DON'T KNOW. HEALTHY? (LAUGHS) ALL RIGHT, WELL, THEN HOW 'BOUT CAREERS? DO YOU LIKE DRIVE, AMBITION? I DON'T REALLY CARE WHAT HE DOES. I MEAN, HONESTLY, HE COULD DO ANYTHING AS LONG AS HE CARES ABOUT WHAT HE DOES. SOFTLY: RIGHT. BUT HE HAS TO BE A GOOD FATHER TO JESSE, AND JESSE NEEDS A GOOD DAD. JAUNTY MUSIC THIS IS THE SECOND DINNER MS ARMSTRONG'S MISSED IN THE LAST TWO WEEKS. FEELS SO WEIRD WITHOUT HER HERE. WELL, WE MIGHT NOT LIKE IT, BUT SHE IS OUT FUNDRAISING FOR THIS COMMUNITY CENTRE. IT ISN'T EXACTLY 'FUNDRAISING'. WELL, YES, IT IS IN A WAY. I MEAN, WHEN SOMETHING IS IMPORTANT, YOU DO WHAT HAS TO BE DONE. EVEN IF IT IS CRAZY. HMM. BUT I CAN'T MOVE. YEAH, YOU CAN. YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO LOSE YOUR ROOK. (SIGHS) HEY, MY FAVOURITE GUYS. HEY, MOM. HEY. WHO'S WINNING? BEN. HE'S JUST ABOUT TO TAKE MY ROOK. OH. HEY, I HAVE AN IDEA. I FEEL LIKE ICE CREAM SUNDAES. WHO'S WITH ME? BUT WE DIDN'T HAVE DINNER YET. AREN'T YOU THE ONE WHO ALWAYS SAYS YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HAVE DINNER BEFORE DESSERT? UH, IT'S A SPECIAL NIGHT. I SAY WE HAVE ICE CREAM FIRST, AND THEN YOU TWO FINE GENTLEMEN HELP ME CHOOSE THE FIRST OF MY LUCKY SUITORS. PHONE BUZZES I'M SORRY, YOU HAVE PLANS TONIGHT? OH, NO, NOT AT ALL. ALL YOURS. GREAT. WELL, LET'S SEE. I MADE MY FIRST MILLION AT 26, TOOK MY FIRST COMPANY PUBLIC AT 28. I OWN THREE HOUSES, A YACHT. I ENJOY ALL THE FINER THINGS IN LIFE. WHAT AM I MISSING? THE LOVE I'VE SACRIFICED TO GET WHERE I AM IN MY CAREER. OOH. WITH THE RIGHT WOMAN, I'M READY TO TAKE THAT NEXT STEP. NO, YOU'RE NOT. THIS IS NUTS. I'VE SEEN SO MANY GUYS, I CAN'T EVEN SEE STRAIGHT. WELL, YOU'VE FOUND TWO THAT YOU'VE LIKED. OH, I DON'T KNOW. I GUESS, BUT WHAT DO I KNOW? I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THESE PEOPLE. I MEAN, MOST NICE PEOPLE ARE TOO MODEST TO SAY SO, AND THE PEOPLE THAT THINK THE MOST OF THEMSELVES, WELL, THOSE ARE THE PEOPLE I WOULDN'T WANT TO SPEND FIVE MINUTES WITH, LET ALONE GO ON A DATE WITH. (CHUCKLES) IF I WAS LOOKING, WHICH I'M NOT, THE GUY I'D BE INTERESTED IN WOULD NEVER EVEN SEND IN ONE OF THESE VIDEOS. I MEAN, YOU CAN'T GAUGE CHEMISTRY WITH SOMEONE BY WATCHING THEM ON TV. IT'S ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL WHEN YOU'RE WITH THE PERSON. WHAT DO YOU MEAN? I DON'T KNOW. RIGHT. COMPLETE. LAUGHS: I DON'T KNOW. SENTIMENTAL MUSIC HEY, SARA. THERE'S SOMETHING I WANNA` MOM! I'M THIRSTY. CAN I GRAB A GLASS OF WATER? SURE, BABY. SIREN WAILS DISTANTLY SHALL WE BEGAN? UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC MUSIC CONTINUES CAMERAS FLASH, REPORTERS CLAMOUR OK, OK. (SIGHS) I DON'T THINK I'M READY FOR THIS. OH, YES, YOU ARE. I MET DAVID. HE SEEMS LIKE A GENUINELY GOOD GUY. I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT THAT. IT'S JUST IT'S BEEN` WELL, IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE I'VE BEEN ON A REAL DATE. HOW LONG IS A LONG TIME? A WHILE. (LAUGHS) I GUESS IT JUST GOT TOO DIFFICULT WORKING AND RAISING A CHILD. IT'S HARD TO FIND TIME FOR A SOCIAL LIFE. I SUPPOSE I COULD'VE SQUEEZED ONE IN. IT'S JUST I DIDN'T WANT JESSE SUBJECTED TO A DIFFERENT BOYFRIEND EVERY SIX TO EIGHT MONTHS. I KNOW I DESERVE A LIFE, BUT NOT AT THE EXPENSE OF MY SON. EVERY BOY NEEDS A FATHER, YOU KNOW, SOMEONE TO LOOK UP TO, EMULATE. SOMEONE TO SHOW HIM HOW TO BE A GOOD MAN. EVERYTHING IMPORTANT I'VE EVER LEARNED CAME FROM MY FATHER, FROM HOW TO OPEN A BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE TO HOW TO PICK THE RIGHT POLO PONY, SO, HMM. (LAUGHS) I-I DO THE BEST I CAN WITH JESSE, BUT I KNOW THERE'S SOME THINGS HE CAN'T LEARN FROM ME. I HAVE A FEELING YOU'VE TAUGHT HIM MORE THAN YOU REALISE. JAZZY MUSIC MY BUSINESS KEEPS ON THE ROAD ABOUT SIX MONTHS OUT OF THE YEAR, BUT YOU WOULDN'T HAVE TO TRAVEL WITH ME IF YOU DIDN'T WANT TO. I LIKE TO TANGO. IN PARIS. TO US. CAMERA FLASHES MRS C, YOUR SWEET POTATO PIE WAS A HIT LAST YEAR; LET'S KEEP THAT ON THE MENU. AND YOU'RE HANDLING THE PUMPKIN PIES AGAIN, RIGHT, SARA? EARTH TO SARA. I'M SORRY, WHAT WERE YOU SAYING? PIES. PIES. RIGHT. SOMEONE'S BEEN PAINTING THE TOWN. YOU CAN HARDLY KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN. ARE YOU KIDDING? OUR GIRL'S SEEN EVERY ELIGIBLE BACHELOR OUR FINE COUNTRY HAS TO OFFER. HARDLY. CAN WE JUST GET THROUGH THIS MENU? BECAUSE I HAVE ANOTHER DATE IN ABOUT AN HOUR. SURE. SO, FOUR 30-POUND TURKEYS LIKE LAST YEAR? OH. THE NELSONS AND THE REST OF THE PEOPLE FROM TOYCO ARE GONNA COME AND HELP US SERVE THE MEAL AND THEY'RE GONNA ANNOUNCE THEIR DONATION. (SCOFFS) ARTHUR AND ROGER NELSON ARE COMING HERE TO SERVE THANKSGIVING DINNER IN A SOUP KITCHEN? DO THEY EVEN KNOW WHAT A LADLE IS? IT'S A LOT DIFFERENT THAN A SHRIMP FORK. ACTUALLY, THEY'RE VERY NICE PEOPLE ONCE YOU GET TO KNOW THEM. OH GOD, YOU'VE GONE OVER TO THE DARK SIDE. NO, I'M JUST TRYING TO KEEP AN OPEN MIND. HMM. SURE. HEY, CAREFUL WITH THOSE SCISSORS, ALL RIGHT. DON'T WANNA... CUT YOUR HAND OFF. HEY, THERE, CINDERELLA. CAN'T BELIEVE HOW MUCH MONEY THEY'RE WASTING ON THESE DRESSES. DO YOU KNOW THAT ERIN WON'T LET ME WEAR ANY OF THEM TWICE? SHE THINKS THE PRESS WOULD HAVE A FIELD DAY IF I ACTUALLY WORE ONE OF THESE OUTFITS MORE THAN ONCE. BEN, I'LL SEE YOU LATER. JESSE, YOU NEED TO BE SHOWERED AND IN BED BEFORE I GET BACK. ALL RIGHT. HAVE FUN. 'K. SENTIMENTAL MUSIC CHOCOLATE. BOTH: YES! WOW, YOU LOOK FANTASTIC. SO ARE YOU READY FOR ANOTHER FUN-FILLED DATING ADVENTURE? HONESTLY? NO. I THOUGHT YOU WERE HAVING A GREAT TIME. I GUESS. YOU KNOW WHAT? LET'S DITCH IT. WHAT? DITCH THE DATE. I'LL CALL HIM UP AND I'LL SAY YOU'RE NOT FEELING WELL AND WE'LL GO OFF AND DO WHATEVER YOU WANNA DO. YOU KNOW WHAT I'D LOVE? WHAT? TO GO EAT AT SOME BAD DINER, NO BRIOCHE, NO ROULADE. I WANT GRIDDLE PANCAKES AND GREASY BACON. IT'S 8 O'CLOCK AT NIGHT AND YOU WANT PANCAKES? (LAUGHS) YOU RICH KIDS GOT A LOT TO LEARN. COME ON, YOU'LL LOVE IT. YOU'RE A TROUBLEMAKER, SARA ARMSTRONG. SENTIMENTAL MUSIC ARE YOU SURE THE KID'S ASLEEP? OH, YEAH. JESSE WAS PRETTY TIRED. I THINK HE WAS OUT BEFORE HIS HEAD HIT THE PILLOW. LET'S GO BACK TO YOUR PLACE. WHAT? CAN'T JUST LEAVE HIM. WHY? COME ON, HE'S 10. HE'S ASLEEP. WHAT'S THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN? WE'RE 100FT AWAY. PLENTY, TRUST ME. BESIDES, WE'RE DOING THE SAME THING HERE WE'D BE DOING AT MY PLACE ANYWAY. NOT EXACTLY. LOOK, SARA'S GOING TO BE HOME SOON. LET'S JUST WATCH THE MOVIE. COME ON. SOMEHOW YOU DON'T STRIKE ME AS A CORNED BEEF HASH KIND OF GUY. WHY NOT? IT'S JUST LEFT-OVER CASSEROLE. I HAD IT EVERY THURSDAY. YOU ATE DINER FOOD? NO. I ATE, UH` I ATE BOARDING SCHOOL FOOD. SAME THING. SARA, YOU'RE NOT REALLY INTO THIS, UH, THIS DATING EXTRAVAGANZA, ARE YOU? SOME OF THE GUYS ARE JUST, UM... (CHUCKLES) WHAT? NO SPARKS? THE MOUNTAIN CLIMBER. LAUGHS: I KNOW. HE'S INTERESTING TO TALK TO. IT'S JUST I` I WOULD NEVER MARRY A CLIMBER. WHY NOT? I TOLD YOU, I PICKED HIM OUT MYSELF. HE MET ALL THE CRITERIA. WELL, ONE DAY HE MIGHT DECIDE TO SCALE MT EVEREST AND NEVER COME BACK. YOU KNOW, IF THIS DOESN'T WORK OUT, I DON'T WANT YOU TO FEEL PRESSURED. YOU KNOW, NOBODY'S EXPECTING A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE HERE. YOU NEVER KNOW. SOMETIMES MIRACLES HAPPEN WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT THEM. PENSIVE MUSIC NO, NO, I GOT IT. (LAUGHS) THANK YOU. THAT IS THE MOST FUN I'VE HAD IN A WHILE. ME TOO. I LIKE YOU, SARA. I'D LIKE TO GET TO KNOW YOU. I... I THINK WE SHOULD WAIT TILL THIS CONTEST IS OVER. YEAH, I THINK THAT'S PROBABLY THE BEST THING` MUSIC SWELLS CAMERA FLASHES (SIGHS) OH NO. UH... TRIUMPHANT MUSIC HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?! YOU'VE BLOWN THE WHOLE THING. SORRY. SORRY? YOU ARE THE HEIR TO THIS COMPANY. THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A NATIONWIDE CONTEST. NOW IT LOOKS LIKE THE FIX WAS IN FROM THE BEGINNING. WELL, WE DIDN'T MEAN FOR THIS TO HAPPEN! I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU MEANT. OR IT COULD BE JUST THE CHRISTMAS MAGIC WE'VE BEEN BILLING FROM THE START. NO, NO, NO, NO. OUR CUSTOMERS WILL FEEL CHEATED. UNLESS WE GIVE THEM A SWEET LOVE STORY ABOUT TWO PEOPLE WHO JUST HAPPENED TO FIND EACH OTHER IN THE MIDST OF ALL THE GLITZ AND GLAMOUR OF THE MEDIA. WHAT? WHAT LOVE STORY? SHH! ARE YOU SURE THIS COULD WORK? WELL, IT'LL TAKE SOME WORK. I'M NOT GONNA DENY IT. WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO GET THE ENTIRE COUNTRY INVOLVED IN THEIR COURTSHIP. THEY ALREADY LOVE SARA, SO WE JUST HAVE TO MAKE THEM FALL IN LOVE WITH ROGER. OK, LOOK, CAN I HAVE A SAY IN THIS? BOTH TALK AT ONCE WILL YOU JUST SIT DOWN? H-HOW DO WE START? WELL, IT'S ALREADY BEEN LEAKED TO THE MEDIA SO LET'S JUST PRETEND THAT THE LEAK CAME FROM US. THAT WAY WE CONTROL THE STORY. SURE. AND THEN PRETTY SOON EVERYONE'S TALKING ABOUT THE TOYCO CHRISTMAS ROMANCE. (LAUGHS) I LIKE THAT. YOU'RE VERY GOOD. THIS JUST MIGHT WORK. TINKLING MUSIC ROGER NELSON?! YOU DATE SOME OF THE MOST ELIGIBLE BACHELORS IN THIS COUNTRY AND YOU CHOOSE A SPOILED BRAT?! HE'S NOT A SPOILED BRAT; HE'S VERY SWEET AND CONSIDERATE. AND NOT THAT IT MATTERS; HIS FATHER WILL NEVER GO FOR IT. IN FACT, IF WE'RE VERY QUIET, I'M SURE WE CAN HEAR ARTHUR SCREAMING HIS HEAD OFF RIGHT NOW. WELL, IF HE'S THE MAN YOU THINK HE IS, MAYBE HE'LL STAND UP TO HIS FATHER. KINDA HARD TO STAND UP TO A MAN WHO'S GONNA LEAVE YOU OVER $200 MILLION. OH! ROGER NELSON IS HERE. HE WANTS TO SEE YOU. COME ON, GET UP! (MOUTHS) (GIGGLES) HI. HI. HOW'D IT GO? UH, WELL, DAD HAD SOME MISGIVINGS, BUT I THINK HE'LL COME AROUND. HEY, GUYS! YOU REMEMBER ROGER. HEY! HOW'S MY`? HOW'S MY FAVOURITE LITTLE CONTEST WINNER? GOOD. HEY, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU WON THE CONTEST, PAL. CHUCKLES: YEAH. GUESS THE CAT'S OUT OF THE BAG. OK, LOOK, YOU KNOW, I-I KNOW ALL OF THIS IS A LITTLE SUDDEN, SO WHY DON'T YOU LET ME TAKE THE TWO OF YOU OUT TO DINNER TONIGHT AND WE CAN GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER A LITTLE BIT BETTER, HUH? YEAH. CAN BEN COME? NO, NO, I THINK IT'S BETTER IF IT'S JUST THE THREE OF YOU. MOURNFUL MUSIC TRAFFIC ROARS MOURNFUL MUSIC CONTINUES HEY, WHAT'S WITH YOU? MY MOM'S GONNA KILL ME WHEN I GET HOME. WHAT'D YOU DO? OH, I WAS KINDA RUDE TO HER NEW BOYFRIEND. HEY, TOM, WHAT'S IT LIKE HAVING A STEPDAD? IT'S NOT SO BAD. HE DOESN'T BOTHER ME TOO MUCH. BUT DO YOU DO THINGS TOGETHER? LIKE WHAT? YOU KNOW, LIKE BUILDING ROCKETS AND BOWLING. YOU KNOW, STUFF LIKE THAT. NO WAY. WHY WOULD I DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT WITH MY STEPDAD? HE'D RUIN IT. IF YOU'RE LUCKY, THIS GUY WILL JUST LEAVE YOU ALONE AND GIVE YOU PRESENTS WHEN HE'S SUPPOSED TO. MOURNFUL MUSIC SWELLS VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRS HI. HOW WAS SCHOOL? JESSE? WE STILL NEED TO TALK ABOUT YOUR BEHAVIOUR LAST NIGHT. I SAID I WAS SORRY. OK, I'LL LET IT GO, BUT ONLY IF YOU PROMISE TO GIVE ROGER A CHANCE. FINE, I'LL TRY. VIBRANT MUSIC CHATTER OH! OH, WHY DON'T I HELP YOU WITH THAT, MR NELSON? I DON'T THINK MASHING POTATOES IS YOUR THING. WHY DON'T YOU GO OVER THERE AND HELP BEN WITH THE STUFFING. FINE, BUT IT'S ROGER. YES, MR NELSON. UH, LILY SAID I SHOULD COME HELP YOU. I THOUGHT STUFFING HAD BREAD IN IT? HERE'S A CARROT. UH, JESSE? JESSE? YOU HAPPY WITH YOUR MOTHER'S NEW BOYFRIEND, HUH? OH, YEAH, I GUESS. IT'S JUST TOO BAD YOU GUYS MAKE A LAME TOY LIKE MORPH MAN. I'M SORRY. OH! UH, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. THIS CAN BE ROUGH ON A BOY HIS AGE. BUT WHAT DOESN'T KILL YA MAKES YOU STRONGER. OH, EXCUSE ME. ERIN... YOU AND SARA SEEM PRETTY CLOSE. I GUESS YOU COULD SAY THAT. WE'VE BEEN NEIGHBOURS EVER SINCE I MOVED TO NEW YORK. SO YOU'VE BEEN PART OF JESSE'S LIFE FOR A LONG TIME. OH, YEAH, SINCE HE WAS 2. WOW. YEAH, YEAH, RIGHT AFTER HIS DAD DIED. UH-HUH. YEP, SHE'S AN INCREDIBLE WOMAN. YOU'RE A LUCKY GUY. CHUCKLES: I KNOW THAT. OH, THANK` UH, I DON'T... UPBEAT MUSIC MUSIC CONTINUES (CLEARS THROAT) CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE? UH, TO BEGIN, I WANT TO THANK THOSE RESPONSIBLE FOR FIXING THIS LOVELY MEAL. AND I ALSO WANT TO THANK ALL OF YOU, FOR ME AND MY FAMILY, SO WARMLY WELCOMING US INTO YOUR COMMUNITY. NOW WITH THE NEW RELATIONSHIP OF MY SON, ROGER, AND SARA, AS I'M SURE YOU'VE ALL READ ABOUT IN THE PRESS, WE FEEL LIKE WE'RE ALL A PART OF ONE BIG FAMILY. APPLAUSE NOW... NOW, HAVING SAID THAT, I AM VERY PROUD TO MAKE A VERY SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT THE PETER ARMSTRONG COMMUNITY CENTRE, WHICH I KNOW HAS BEEN AN INTEGRAL PART OF YOUR COMMUNITY FOR THE PAST SIX YEARS. AND I KNOW MANY OF YOU ARE AWARE THAT IT'S BEING THREATENED BY THE DEVELOPMENT OF CONDOS ON THIS VERY LAND. SO IT GIVES ME A GREAT DEAL OF PLEASURE TO ANNOUNCE THAT TOYCO INTERNATIONAL HAS DECIDED TO DONATE THE REMAINDER OF THE PURCHASE PRICE $555,000. APPLAUSE UPLIFTING MUSIC SOME PICTURES? ALL RIGHT. UH, NOW, YOU WANTED TO SAY SOMETHING? OH. REPORTER: SARA, A WORD? I-I JUST WANT TO THANK TOYCO FOR THEIR VERY GENEROUS DONATION. I HAVE ALWAYS BELIEVED THAT MIRACLES HAPPEN WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT THEM. AND NOW, (CHUCKLES) I HAVE PROOF. SCATTERED LAUGHTER I ALSO WANT TO SAY THAT I AM SO HAPPY THAT WE WILL BE SERVING THANKSGIVING DINNER FOR MANY MANY YEARS TO COME. APPLAUSE, HAPPY CHATTER CAN WE EXPECT ANY MIRACLES BETWEEN YOU AND ROGER? MAYBE BEFORE CHRISTMAS? EXCITED CHATTER YEAH, MS ARMSTRONG'S BEEN KIND ENOUGH TO GO OUT ON ONE DATE WITH ME, BUT I THINK IT'S A LITTLE EARLY TO START TALKING ABOUT MIRACLES, SO... (CHUCKLES) ALL CLAMOUR ALL CHANT: KISS HER! KISS HER! CLAMOURING INCREASES CHEERING APPLAUSE UPLIFTING MUSIC SWELLS CAMERAS FLASH FESTIVE MUSIC 'JINGLE BELLS' HEY, SO YOU REALLY BUY FIVE TREES EVERY YEAR? SEVEN. FIVE FOR THE CENTRE AND ONE FOR EACH OF US. YOU ARE AMAZING, YOU KNOW THAT? AS A MATTER OF FACT I DO. MOM, WE FOUND THE PERFECT TREE FOR THE LIVING ROOM. EXCEPT THAT IT'S 15' TALL. OH, SWEETHEART, WE GO THROUGH THIS EVERY YEAR. 9' MAX. NAH, IT'S` IT'S 9'. GOTCHA. YOU KNOW, UP IN MY FAMILY'S PLACE IN CONNECTICUT, WE'VE GOT A 20' TREE IN THE FRONT HALL AND A 40' TREE IN THE PARLOUR. YOU CAN COME UP THERE AND SEE IT ANY TIME YOU'D LIKE. YEAH, WE'LL SEE. (CHUCKLES) SORRY, IT'S GONNA TAKE A LITTLE TIME. LUCKILY WE'VE GOT PLENTY OF THAT. I GOTTA GO. OK. THANKS FOR LUNCH. I'LL SEE YOU LATER. WOULDN'T MISS IT. PENSIVE MUSIC WE ARE GETTING SOMEWHERE AT LAST. MORPH MAN IS FINALLY BEGINNING TO MOVE OFF THE SHELVES. WE'LL GET OURSELVES OFF THE HOOK YET. OOH, DID ERIN TALK TO YOU? SHE TALKED TO HER FRIEND OVER AT SPECTRE COMICS. THERE MAY BE A MORPH MAN COMIC BOOK ON THE NEWSSTANDS THIS SPRING, HUH? OH. OH, THAT'S GREAT, DAD. YOU DIDN'T HEAR A WORD I SAID, DID YOU? YOU KNOW, I THINK I'M GONNA BUY HER SOME FLOWERS. WHAT, ERIN? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA BUY ERIN FLOWERS FOR? SHE'S ONLY EARNING HER PAY CHEQUE. NOT ERIN, DAD. SARA. I THINK I'M GONNA BUY HER SOME ROSES. BAD MOVE. WHY? BAD MOVE. THEN THEY EXPECT IT. THAT'S HOW I GOT IN ALL THAT TROUBLE WITH MUFFY. HEY, YOU'RE NOT TURNING SOFT ON ME, ARE YA? (STUTTERS) NO, DAD. NO, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. I GOTTA GO. WHAT? HEY. HEY, ROGER! GOT SOME RELISH FOR THIS THING? I STILL DON'T SEE WHY ROGER HAS TO COME OVER. WE JUST SAW HIM AN HOUR AGO. BECAUSE HE WANTS TO GET TO KNOW US BETTER. WHY DID BEN LEAVE? WE ALWAYS DECORATE OUR TREES TOGETHER. SWEETIE, HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND THIS YEAR, AND SHE WANTS TO BE A PART OF HIS LIFE TOO. BUT WE'RE DOING THE COMMUNITY CENTRE TREES TOMORROW, AND BEN'LL BE THERE. OK. KNOCK AT DOOR THAT MUST BE ROGER. GREAT (!) KNOCK-KNOCK! HI. HI. THANK YOU. BOTH CHUCKLE THEY'RE BEAUTIFUL. COME ON IN. LET ME TAKE YOUR COAT. GENTLE MUSIC KNOCK AT DOOR HEY! OH, HI. HI. WHAT'S THAT? OH, UH, JESSE MADE THIS FOR ME WHEN HE WAS 6. DON'T YOU THINK YOU'RE SPENDING A LITTLE TOO MUCH TIME WITH THOSE PEOPLE? WHEN YOU SAY 'THOSE PEOPLE', I'M ASSUMING YOU MEAN SARA AND JESSE. YOU ACT LIKE YOU'RE FAMILY. YOU'RE NOT FAMILY. SO WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? WALK AWAY FROM JESSE AFTER EIGHT YEARS? AND IT'S NOT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH THE BOY THAT BOTHERS ME. I SEE THE WAY YOU LOOK AT HER. THE WAY YOU LOOK WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT HER. TELL ME I'M WRONG. I'LL NEVER BRING IT UP AGAIN. SOFTLY: I CAN'T. GOODBYE, BEN. MELANCHOLY MUSIC I DON'T UNDERSTAND, WHERE DOES ALL THIS GO? IT'S CALLED GARLAND, AND WE PUT THAT AROUND THE BEDROOM WINDOWS. CHUCKLES: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DO ALL THIS YOURSELF. IT'S SO MUCH WORK. I COULD HIRE SOMEBODY TO HAVE THEM DECORATE THE WHOLE APARTMENT. CAN I GO TO BED NOW? IT'S AN HOUR BEFORE YOUR BEDTIME. WELL, THEN I'LL GO TO BED EARLY. JESSE, WHY DON'T YOU`? I'M SORRY. I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO HIM. OH, HE'LL COME AROUND, I PROMISE. HEY, LET'S YOU AND I SNEAK OUT AND GET A DRINK. I CAN'T JUST LEAVE JESSE HERE BY HIMSELF. WHY NOT? AND I CAN'T ASK BEN; HE'S GOT A DATE. THAT'S GOOD NEWS. DON'T YOU THINK OLD BEN SPENDS TOO MUCH TIME WITH JESSE ANYWAY? NO. I TAKE IT YOU DO. LET ME GET YOU A NANNY. HUH? SHE COULD DO ALL THE COOKING, THE CLEANING; SHE COULD LOOK AFTER JESSE. I DON'T WANT A NANNY! LOOK, WHAT'S WRONG WITH NANNIES? I WAS PRACTICALLY RAISED BY NANNIES TILL I WENT OFF TO BOARDING SCHOOL, AND LOOK HOW I TURNED OUT. LAUGHS: I CAN'T EVEN BEGIN TO TELL YOU WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT STATEMENT. WHISPERS: I'M SORRY. I JUST WANNA SPEND MORE TIME WITH YOU. THAT'S ALL. OK. UM, TOMORROW NIGHT. ALL RIGHT? WE'VE GOT MORE VOLUNTEERS AT THE SOUP KITCHEN THAN WE CAN HANDLE. I'LL SNEAK OUT. JAUNTY MUSIC QUIET CHATTER HEY. HEY YOURSELF. OH YEAH, NICE DECORATIONS. UM, LILY SAID YOU WANTED TO TALK TO ME. I JUST WANT TO KNOW IF YOU AND JESSE WANT TO DO ANOTHER ROUND OF BOWLING TONIGHT. I CAN'T. OH, OK. WELL, UM, CAN I TAKE JESSE? UH. JESS, YOU WANNA GO BOWLING WITH BEN TONIGHT? ARE YOU COMING? NOT TONIGHT. I CAN'T. JUST YOU AND ME, SPORT. ALL RIGHT. NICE JOB. HEY, WHY DON'T YOU GET AMBER TO GIVE BOWLING A SHOT? I DON'T THINK AMBER WILL BE COMING ROUND. I'M SORRY. NO, NO, TRUST ME, IT'S A GOOD THING. RIGHT. ALL RIGHT, UM... WELL, I'LL SEE YOU GUYS WHEN I GET HOME LATER. ABSOLUTELY. HAVE FUN. OK. BYE, JESSE. ROMANTIC MUSIC IT'S BEAUTIFUL. SO ARE YOU. ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS THANK YOU. THANK YOU. DRINKS. THANK YOU. WHERE IS EVERYONE? WHAT? I` WE CAN'T BE THE ONLY ONES HERE. OH. OH, I, UH, BOUGHT OUT THE RESTAURANT FOR THE EVENING, YEAH. YOU PAID THE RESTAURANT TO TURN CUSTOMERS AWAY? (INHALES) OH, YEAH, YEAH. (LAUGHS) THAT'S CRAZY. OH, NO, I WANTED US TO HAVE A SPECIAL EVENING ALL TO OURSELVES. THIS WAY WE WON'T BE DISTURBED. (GIGGLES) IT'S NICE, RIGHT? I HAD A FUN TIME BOWLING. YEAH, I'M GLAD YOU DID. HEY, I'M SORRY YOU HAVE TO LOOK AFTER ME TONIGHT. I KNOW YOU'RE PRETTY TIRED OF SITTING AROUND HERE PLAYING STUPID OLD CHESS. I LOVE SPENDING TIME WITH YOU. BELIEVE ME, MY MOOD HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. IT'S ABOUT MOM AND ROGER, ISN'T IT? DO YOU EVER FEEL LIKE YOU'RE NOT COMPLETE UNLESS YOU'RE AROUND HER? THAT'S WHAT MY DAD SAID LOVE WAS. WHEN I WAS MAKING THAT VIDEO, WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TELL ME YOU LIKED HER? WELL, BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW THEN. WHAT IS IT THEY SAY? YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'VE GOT TILL IT'S GONE. YEAH. DID YOU EVER TELL HER HOW YOU FELT? JESS, I'M NOT WHAT YOUR MOM NEEDS. I'M JUST A GEEKY GUY WASTING HIS LIFE STRINGING ALONG AT THE LOCAL NEWSPAPER. MOM SAYS YOU'RE A GOOD WRITER. REALLY? SHE SAID THAT? YEAH. WELL, IT'S TOO LATE. SHE'S GOT ROGER. COME ON, WHAT DOES ROGER HAVE THAT YOU DON'T? WELL, FOR STARTERS, ABOUT $100 MILLION. OH, YOU KNOW MY MOM DOESN'T CARE ABOUT MONEY. BESIDES, HOW COULD SHE MAKE A DECISION WHEN SHE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW YOU FEEL? CHECK. ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? DOESN'T IT BOTHER YOU THAT EVERYONE'S STARING AT US? WHO? QUIETLY: THE MAITRE D', THE WAITERS, THE COOKS, THE BAND. OH. OH, YEAH, NO, I HADN'T NOTICED. I FEEL LIKE WE'RE INSIDE A FISHBOWL. MAYBE THAT'S BECAUSE THEY'VE NEVER SEEN ANYONE AS BEAUTIFUL AS YOU. DON'T YOU SEE THEM? THIS ISN'T ABOUT ANYBODY ELSE, SARA. THIS IS ABOUT YOU AND ME. HEY! DAD, YOU WANTED TO SEE ME? YEAH, ROGER. COME ON IN. HOW ARE YOU AND SARA DOING? GREAT. YEAH, WELL, WE'RE NOT GETTING AS MUCH COVERAGE WITH THE TABLOIDS RECENTLY. YOU KNOW, WE'RE USING MOMENTUM. WELL, THE PRESS ISN'T INTERESTING IN BORING, HAPPY PEOPLE, SO... (CHUCKLES) WELL, WE GOTTA CHANGE THAT, AND I THINK I GOT JUST THE THING TO BRING THE PRESS BACK TO THE STORY. WHAT'S`? A CHRISTMAS ENGAGEMENT. SCOFFS: WHAT?! DAD, I'VE` WE'VE ONLY KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR A FEW WEEKS! YEAH, BUT EVERYBODY LOVES A CHRISTMAS ENGAGEMENT. OR A CHRISTMAS WEDDING. WAIT! BETTER STILL. WH-WH-WHOA, WHOA! NO, WHOA! NO, I NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT MARRYING SARA. WELL, YOU LOVE HER, DON'T YOU? I-I DON'T` I DON'T KNOW. IF I` DO YOU LOVE HER OR DON'T YOU? (STUTTERS) I HAVE FEELINGS, BUT` THERE YOU GO. THERE YOU GO. LET'S TALK ABOUT THAT. I MEAN, WHEN YOU HEAR HER VOICE, DO YOU, UH, DO YOU JUST FEEL TINGLES ALL OVER? AND THEN WHEN YOU TOUCH HER, DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE JUST ON FIRE? AND WHEN YOU KISS HER, DO YOU SEE FIREWORKS? OK! I DO, I DO, BUT` ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT! THEN YOU LOVE HER! DAD, THAT'S FAST. (STUTTERS) LOOK, SON, WE ARE ON THE ONE-YARD LINE AND YOU JUST SAID YOU LOVE HER. (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) WELL, YOU KNOW, I... I GUESS I DO. LAUGHS: WELL, THEN GET MARRIED! OK, OK. I'LL DO IT. (LAUGHS UPROARIOUSLY) THERE YOU GO. WHAT DO I DO? PUT A PIECE OF CHICKEN ON. IT'S VERY SIMPLE. OK. CHICKEN. GREAT. THANK YOU. HEY, IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU, MANNY. HOW YOU DOIN'? HAVE YOU MET ROGER NELSON? HE'S DATING SARA. MM? OH. OK. WELL, IT'S VERY NICE TO MEET YOU, MANNY. (CLEARS THROAT) WHAT ARE YOU DOING? OH, EXCUSE ME. I HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF SOMETHING. WHAT? HEY, FRANK. ARE YOU SURE THIS IS THE BEST TIME TO DO THIS? WELL, THERE IS NO BETTER TIME. I WISH I'D THOUGHT TO HAVE ERIN DRESS HER FOR DINNER. THAT'S NOT EXACTLY HER BEST COLOUR. SHE'S... BUT I GUESS IT'LL HAVE TO DO. UH, ERIN, DID YOU...? THE CAMERA GUY'S ALL SET. READY WHEN YOU ARE, SIR. OK. GUYS, COME IN. OH, MAN. OK, LET'S GET ON WITH IT. (CLEARS THROAT) CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE? ATTENTION, YES, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. UM, ROGER? (CHUCKLES) OK. UH... AS YOU ALL KNOW, SARA AND I MET EACH OTHER JUST SIX WEEKS AGO WHEN WE RECEIVED A VIDEO ESSAY FROM HER, UH, HER WONDERFUL SON, JESSE. WE WERE ALL SO MOVED BY HIS CHRISTMAS WISH. IT WAS ONE OF THE FEW ENTRIES WE RECEIVED THAT DIDN'T ASK FOR MATERIAL GOODS. BUT THEN I REALISED JUST LAST NIGHT THAT WE STILL HADN'T GRANTED JESSE'S WISH. YOU SEE, JESSE DIDN'T ASK FOR A BOYFRIEND FOR HIS MOTHER. HE ASKED FOR A HUSBAND. AND THEN I REALISED HOW IMPORTANT IT WAS TO ME TO GRANT THAT WISH. OH DEAR GOD. PENSIVE MUSIC CAMERAS FLASH SARA ARMSTRONG, WILL YOU DO ME THE HONOUR OF BECOMING MY WIFE? YOU WANT ME TO MARRY YOU? YEAH. YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME. WELL, IF YOU BECOME MY WIFE, I PROMISE WE'LL SPEND THE REST OF OUR LIVES GETTING TO KNOW ONE ANOTHER. PENSIVE MUSIC CONTINUES YES. LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE YES, I'LL MARRY YOU. APPLAUSE CONTINUES PLAINTIVE MUSIC QUIET KNOCK AT DOOR (TUNES GUITAR) YOU DIDN'T STAY FOR DESSERT. (SIGHS) WASN'T REALLY THAT HUNGRY, KIDDO. LISTEN, BEN, YOU'VE GOTTA TELL HER. SEE, I DON'T REMEMBER MY DAD. YOU'RE THE ONLY DAD I'VE KNOWN. HEY. SHE'S GONNA MARRY HIM. OK? SHE DOESN'T LOVE ME. YOU DON'T KNOW THAT! SHE'LL END UP MARRYING THE WRONG GUY WHEN THE RIGHT ONE WAS LIVING RIGHT NEXT DOOR TO HER THE WHOLE TIME. THROUGHOUT YOUR LIFE YOU'LL BE WONDERING WHAT WOULD'VE HAPPENED IF YOU WOULD HAVE JUST TOLD HER. AND THEN I'LL LOSE YOU. NO, YOU WON'T. YEAH, YOU SAY THAT, BUT I WILL. WE'LL DRIFT APART AND... I DON'T WANNA LOSE YOU. PLAINTIVE MUSIC CONTINUES ROMANTIC MUSIC HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT HERE? ENJOYING THE SNOW. YEAH, WHO SAYS IT DOESN'T SNOW IN NEW YORK BEFORE CHRISTMAS? OH, IT'S TOO BAD IT WON'T LAST. SAYS WHO? I GUESS YOU NEVER SAW THIS MUCH SNOW WHEN YOU WERE GROWING UP IN ARIZONA. CHUCKLES: YEAH, TRY NEVER. IT WASN'T UNTIL I MARRIED PETE AND MOVED TO NEW YORK. IT WAS THE FIRST TIME I'D EVER SEEN SNOW. NOW I THINK IT'S MY FAVOURITE THING IN THE WORLD. ME TOO. CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR ENGAGEMENT, BY THE WAY. THANK YOU. YOU DON'T THINK IT'S A LITTLE SUDDEN? WELL... SOMETIMES IN LIFE WHEN YOU JUST KNOW, YOU KNOW, AND THINGS FALL INTO PLACE. MM. IN MY EXPERIENCE, LIFE NEVER JUST FALLS INTO PLACE. DO YOU LOVE HIM? HE'S A GOOD MAN. THAT DOESN'T ANSWER MY QUESTION. HE LOVES ME. AND HE WANTS TO BE PART OF OUR FAMILY. AND THAT'S ALL I'VE EVER WANTED FOR JESSE. AND WITH ROGER COMES GRANDPARENTS AND AUNTS AND UNCLES AND... MOST IMPORTANTLY A FATHER TO JESSE. THIS MEANS NOTHING IF HE'S NOT THE HUSBAND THAT YOU DESERVE. (CHUCKLES) AND WHAT DO I DESERVE, BEN? THE WORLD. MUSIC SWELLS WE SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT. I AM SO GLAD THAT WE DID THAT. WHY? BECAUSE, SARA, I LOVE YOU. I CAN'T` STOP. JUST STOP. MELANCHOLY MUSIC JOLLY MUSIC IT TOOK SOME WRANGLING, AND A HEFTY CHEQUE, BUT THE CATHEDRAL IS OURS FOR THE CHRISTMAS DAY CEREMONY. AW, A WEDDING PLANNER EXTRAORDINAIRE. WE CAN'T GET IN UNTIL AFTER 12 O'CLOCK, BUT MY PEOPLE HAVE GUARANTEED US THAT THE CHURCH WILL BE READY AS SOON AS THE GUESTS ARRIVE. AND, OF COURSE, TAVERN HAS AGREED TO GIVE IS THE MAIN DINING ROOM FOR THE RECEPTION. WOW. TAVERN ON THE GREEN. IS IT`? IS EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT? OH, I... I WAS JUST THINKING THAT WE WOULD HAVE A SMALL CEREMONY. YOU KNOW, JUST IMMEDIATE FAMILY. A SIMPLE AFFAIR. SARA, YOU AND ROGER ARE AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS. YOU'RE EVERYONE'S PERFECT COUPLE. NOW WE HAVE TO FULFIL THEIR FANTASY WITH THE DREAM WEDDING. I THOUGHT THAT'S WHAT YOU WANTED. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? WELL` WELL, LOOK, NO, LOOK, I KNOW IT SEEMS OVERWHELMING RIGHT NOW, BUT I PROMISE YOU, WE'RE GONNA MAKE THIS THE DAY OF YOUR DREAMS. OK? OK. EXCELLENT. ALL CHUCKLE A TOAST TO THE HAPPY COUPLE. CHEERS. GLASSES CLINK OH. SORRY, SORRY. GOODNESS, THEY DON'T MAKE THIS EASY. CAN YOU JUST TELL ME WHY THEY DIDN'T DO THIS DOWN AT THE BRIDAL SHOP? BECAUSE I TOLD THEM THAT I DIDN'T HAVE ALL DAY TO SPEND AT THE SALON, SO ARTHUR SAID TO BRING THE WHOLE SHOW HERE INSTEAD. OH, IT'S A GORGEOUS DRESS, BUT, OOH... (SIGHS) MY FRIEND, YOU LOOK AMAZING. THANK YOU. OH WELL, I JUST` I WISH I'D GOTTEN TO CHOOSE IT MYSELF. UM, COULD YOU BOTH GIVE US A MOMENT, PLEASE. THANK YOU. ARE YOU SURE YOU WANNA DO THIS? MARRYING ROGER, I MEAN. COURSE. HE'S THE PERFECT MAN, AND HE'S GOING TO MAKE A WONDERFUL FATHER TO JESSE. OH, HE'S THE PERFECT MAN. I FEEL LIKE CINDERELLA. WELL, YOU SAY THAT LIKE IT'S A BAD THING, BUT IT'S EVERY WOMAN'S DREAM TO BE CINDERELLA. IT'S EVERY GIRL'S DREAM TO BE CINDERELLA. I HAVEN'T BEEN A GIRL FOR A VERY LONG TIME. I'VE ALREADY HAD MY FAIRY TALE WEDDING, AND I ALWAYS THOUGHT IF I GOT MARRIED AGAIN, I'D GET MARRIED RIGHT HERE IN THE CENTRE. (LAUGHS) ARTHUR NELSON WOULD HAVE A HEART ATTACK IF HE HAD HOMELESS PEOPLE AND WELFARE MOTHERS AT HIS PUBLICITY COUP. EXACTLY. HIS. SARA, WHERE`? WHERE ARE YOU? OH! LISTEN, THE PLUMBERS ARE HAVING A PROBLEM WITH THE MAIN LINE. THEY HAVE TO REPLACE IT. THEY CAN'T DO IT UNLESS YOU APPROVE IT. ALL RIGHT, HELP ME UP. UH, SARA, THIS IS YOUR WEDDING DRESS. I'LL TRY NOT TO GET IT DIRTY. WOW. YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU. LISTEN, UM, ABOUT THE OTHER NIGHT. I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW I DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE. OH, THERE'S NO NEED TO APOLOGISE. I DIDN'T SAY I WAS SORRY. I LOVE YOU, SARA, AND I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW THAT. AND EVEN THOUGH I WISH YOU WEREN'T MARRYING ROGER, I GENUINELY HOPE THAT YOU TWO ARE HAPPY. DOOR OPENS HEY` SARA, THEY ARE WAITING OUT HERE! SARA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WEARING THAT DRESS? OH, HE'S RIGHT. UH, THE GROOM SHOULD NOT SEE THE DRESS BEFORE` I'M NOT SUPERSTITIOUS, BUT THAT'S A $25,000 DRESS! IT COST WHAT?! THAT'S WHAT A DESIGNER DRESS COSTS. WE GOTTA GO OVER A FEW THINGS` OH, ROGER` BOTH TALK AT ONCE SARA, WE GOTTA TALK ABOUT THESE THINGS TODAY. OK, OK, NO, ALL RIGHT, OK` WOMEN SCREAM OK, GREAT, I'LL BOOK A TABLE. NO, NO, AT MY PLACE. I'LL MAKE DINNER FOR THREE. NO, NO, SARA, I WANT TO SPEND SOME TIME WITH MY FUTURE WIFE. (SCREAMS) BEN CAN BABYSIT. NO, NO! YOU'RE GONNA BE JESSE'S FATHER. THE LEAST YOU CAN DO IS HAVE DINNER WITH HIM. RIGHT, NO, OK. YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'RE RIGHT. I'LL GET A BOTTLE OF WINE, AND... ALL SCREAM YOU'RE GONNA RUIN THAT DRESS, SARA JUST GO HOME! JUST` LET THE PLUMBER GUYS UNDER THERE. ROGER, GO HOME. I'LL CALL YOU! OK. OK. ALL RIGHTY. CLANGING, YELLING STAY DRY! (CHUCKLES) BYE! (GROANS) I GOT IT. I GOT VENETIA TO AGREE TO MAKE THE DRESS AGAIN, SO YOU DON'T NEED TO WORRY ABOUT. GREAT. JESSE, WHY DON'T YOU TRY SOME OF THE SALAD THAT ROGER BROUGHT. SALAD SMELLS FUNNY, AND THE CHEESE IS ALL MOULDY. (CHUCKLES) THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S GORGONZOLA. IT'S A DOUBLE FAT CHEESE. IT'S AGED ABOUT SIX` I DON'T CARE. IT STILL SMELLS FUNNY. JESSE! THAT'S NOT NICE. APOLOGISE. FINE. I'M SORRY THAT YOUR SALAD SMELLS FUNNY. MM. MAY I BE EXCUSED? YES. MAYBE THIS WASN'T A VERY GOOD IDEA. IT'S ALL RIGHT. HE JUST NEEDS SOME DISCIPLINE, THAT'S ALL. WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN? YOU CAN'T ALLOW HIM TO TALK TO PEOPLE THAT WAY. I NEVER WOULD'VE SPOKEN TO MY FATHER LIKE THAT. HE'S CONFUSED AND SCARED. HE JUST NEEDS A LITTLE BIT OF TIME TO ADJUST TO THE CHANGES. THIS IS HAPPENING SO FAST TO ALL OF US. CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT IT FEELS LIKE FOR A 10-YEAR-OLD? AND HE'LL HAVE A FEW WEEKS TO ADJUST BEFORE WE TAKE HIM UP TO MAYFIELD. MAYFIELD? MAYFIELD ACADEMY. MY DAD HAD TO PULL A FEW STRINGS, BUT WE GOT JESSE ACCEPTED TO BEGIN NEXT SEMESTER. YOU WANT TO SEND MY SON TO BOARDING SCHOOL? COURSE! IT'LL MAKE A MAN OUT OF HIM, AND IT'LL GIVE US A CHANCE TO GET USED TO BEING NEWLYWEDS. YOU'RE NOT SENDING MY SON TO BOARDING SCHOOL. I WANT TO TUCK HIM IN AT NIGHT, NOT DRIVE UP ON THE WEEKENDS TO SEE HIM. NO, NO, HE'LL LOVE IT. IT'S A GREAT WAY FOR A BOY TO LEARN HOW TO STAND ON HIS OWN TWO FEET. YOU'RE NOT SENDING MY SON TO A DIFFERENT STATE TO LEARN HOW TO FEND FOR HIMSELF. I THOUGHT YOU'D BE ECSTATIC. MY HUSBAND, JESSE'S FATHER, WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM US WHEN THAT LITTLE BOY WAS ONLY 2 YEARS OLD. I'M THE ONLY CONSTANT IN HIS LIFE. WELL, YOU'LL SEE HIM EVERY VACATION. IT'S NOT AS IF` STOP. IT IS BAD ENOUGH THAT I'M GETTING MARRIED IN A CHURCH I'VE NEVER BEEN IN, IN A DRESS THAT... I HATE, SURROUNDED BY 500 PEOPLE THAT I'VE NEVER MET BEFORE AND TO A MAN... THAT DOESN'T SEEM TO KNOW WHO I AM. (EXHALES) SARA. I DON'T UNDERSTAND. WHAT'S WRONG? (SIGHS) THAT'S WHAT'S WRONG. (SIGHS) SENTIMENTAL MUSIC HEY, HANDSOME. I'M SLEEPING. WHAT? WHERE'S YOUR UGLY RING? (CHUCKLES RUEFULLY) I GAVE IT BACK. YOU OK? I THINK SO. I-I JUST WISH I'D COME TO MY SENSES SOONER. I JUST WANTED A FATHER FOR YOU SO BAD. ARE YOU OK ABOUT IT BEING JUST THE TWO OF US AGAIN? IT'S NEVER JUST BEEN THE TWO OF US. AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER, THERE'S ALWAYS BEEN THREE OF US. BEN'S ALWAYS BEEN THERE FOR US, HASN'T HE? DOESN'T SEEM LIKE HE GETS MUCH OUT OF THE DEAL, EITHER. HE GETS TO PLAY WITH YOU. AND YOU. SWEETHEART, I KNOW YOU WANT US TO BE TOGETHER, BUT IT'S... IT'S COMPLICATED. NO, IT'S NOT. HE LOVES YOU, AND I'M PRETTY SURE YOU LOVE HIM. YOU'RE JUST TOO STUBBORN TO ADMIT IT. JUST GO TALK TO HIM. 'WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS' CASTLES DONATED A HONEY HAM AGAIN. I'LL SEND A THANK YOU NOTE. OH, AND AMBERSONS DELI, THEY GAVE US TWO 30-POUND TURKEYS. OH, LOOKS LIKE WE'VE GOT THE ENTREES COVERED. IT WAS AWFULLY NICE OF MR NELSON TO LET YOU KEEP THE MONEY. I MEAN, EVEN THOUGH YOU'RE NOT MARRYING HIS SON. WHAT WAS HE GONNA DO? TAKE OVER HALF A MILLION DOLLARS AWAY FROM A COMMUNITY CENTRE THE WEEK BEFORE CHRISTMAS? MM, THAT WOULD BE A PUBLICITY COUP FOR TOYCO (!) EXCEPT THAT NOW WE DON'T HAVE A SANTA, OR ANYONE ELSE TO READ 'THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS'. HOW 'BOUT BEN? UH, BEN DECIDED TO TAKE A LITTLE TIME OFF. HE NEEDED A VACATION. WHAT TIME ARE THE VOLUNTEERS COMING? IN AN HOUR. DON'T WORRY, WE'LL BE READY. LISTEN, WHY DON'T YOU GO AND SPEND THE REST OF CHRISTMAS EVE WITH JESSE? AND WE'LL SEE YOU AT MIDNIGHT MASS. ARE YOU SURE? OH, HONESTLY, YOU'RE NOT MUCH HELP TO US IN THIS CONDITION ANYWAY. THANK YOU. ALL RIGHT, I'LL SEE YOU ALL SOON. THANKS AGAIN. SENTIMENTAL MUSIC HEY, MOM, SHALL I GO GET BEN? I DON'T THINK HE'S IN. BUT HE WILL BE THERE, RIGHT? WE'VE NEVER GONE TO MIDNIGHT MASS WITHOUT HIM. I HOPE SO, SWEETIE. BUT WE BETTER GET A MOVE ON. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE PART OF MIDNIGHT MASS? THE CAROLS, AND WHEN THE LIGHTS GO ON AND IT'S CHRISTMAS. AND THE MAGIC ` CHRISTMAS MIRACLE. ME TOO. SENTIMENTAL MUSIC CONTINUES CONGREGATION SINGS WE'RE LATE. HEY, MOM, YOU KNOW WE NEVER HAD A WHITE CHRISTMAS BEFORE, DID WE? MAYBE BEN WAS RIGHT. WHAT, MOM? NOTHING, BABY. COME ON, HURRY. YEAH, IT'S COLD. THANK YOU. # THE HOPES AND FEARS OF ALL THE YEARS # ARE MET IN THEE TONIGHT. # WHISPERS: MERRY CHRISTMAS. PRIEST: PLEASE BE SEATED. CONGREGATION MURMUR 'THE FIRST NOEL' ORGAN PLAYS WOMAN READS: AND IT CAME TO PASS IN THOSE DAYS 'THAT THERE WENT OUT A DECREE FROM CAESAR AUGUSTUS 'THAT ALL THE WORLD SHOULD BE TAXED, 'AND THIS TAXING WAS FIRST MADE WHEN SIRENIUS WAS...' HEY. IS THIS SEAT TAKEN? 'AND ALL WENT TO BE TAXED, EVERYONE INTO HIS OWN CITY. 'AND JOSEPH ALSO WENT UP FROM GALILEE, OUT OF THE CITY OF NAZARETH INTO JUDEA...' I MISSED YOU. '...UNTO THE CITY OF DAVID.' WHISPERS: I MISSED YOU TOO. 'BECAUSE HE WAS ONE OF THE HOUSE AND LINEAGE OF DAVID...' SORRY ABOUT ROGER. I'M NOT. I SHOULD'VE NEVER SAID YES IN THE FIRST PLACE. I DIDN'T LOVE HIM; I JUST... I'VE BEEN SO BUSY FOR SO LONG THAT... I HAVEN'T BEEN LISTENING TO WHAT MY HEART WANTS. I'M LISTENING NOW. WHAT DOES YOUR HEART WANT NOW? YOU. BELL TOLLS WILL YOU MARRY ME? I WOULD LOVE THAT MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD. BELL CONTINUES TOLLING I LOVE YOU. 'FOR UNTO YOU IS BORN THIS DAY IN THE CITY OF DAVID A SAVIOUR, WHICH IS CHRIST THE LORD.' BELLS PEAL JOYFULLY MERRY CHRISTMAS. ALL: MERRY CHRISTMAS! ALL CHATTER HAPPILY MERRY CHRISTMAS. HOW DO YOU GUYS FEEL? BOTH: COMPLETE. I GUESS IT REALLY IS A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE. JOYFUL MUSIC 'ANGELS WE HAVE HEARD ON HIGH' CAPTIONS BY JESSICA BOELL. WWW.ABLE.CO.NZ CAPTIONS WERE MADE POSSIBLE WITH FUNDING FROM NZ ON AIR. COPYRIGHT ABLE 2016