1 (AMERICAN INDIAN CHANTING IN NATIVE LANGUAGE) (THUNDER) HUT! (STRENUOUS GRUNTING) (HARD, THUDDING IMPACT OF COLLIDING BODIES) (EXPLOSIVE GRUNTS) (REFEREE'S WHISTLE) (FANS ROARING) SPORTS ANNOUNCER: THIS DOES NOT LOOK GOOD. CAP ROONEY, 3-TIME LEAGUE MVP AND COACH TONY D'AMATO'S STAR 38-YEAR-OLD QUARTERBACK, IS DOWN AND NOT MOVING. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING! DON'T YOU SEE HE'S HURT? (CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING) ANNOUNCER: WOW! SECOND ANNOUNCER: OH, WOW! FIRST ANNOUNCER: DID YOU SEE THAT? FIRST ANNOUNCER: DID YOU SEE THAT? THAT HURTS. EVERY SHARKS FAN HAS A SICKENING FEELING IN THE PIT OF HIS STOMACH AT THIS MOMENT. I KNOW I DO. LET'S LOOK AT THIS AGAIN. (GROANING IN EXTREME PAIN) ANNOUNCER: ROONEY IS DOWN AND IN OBVIOUS PAIN. GIVE ME VINCENT. RIGGAMAN MAKES A BEAUTIFUL MOVE OVER JULIAN WASHINGTON-- WHAT A LOUSY BLOCK. WHICH FREES UP WATSON UP THE MIDDLE. AND LOOK AT GATES ON THE BACK SIDE. OOH! WHO WAS ON THE WEAK SIDE SAFETY? WILL YOU STOP SHOWING THAT? ALL RIGHT, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH CAP'S CONDITION AFTER THIS WORD FROM OUR SPONSORS. ALL RIGHT, CAP. THEY CUT TO A COMMERCIAL. YOU CAN GET UP. I THINK I BROKE MY BACK! OHH! WATCH MY BUTT! DAMN IT! <BLEEP>! MOVE YOUR FEET. WHERE DOES IT HURT? RIGHT WHERE YOU'RE TOUCHING IT! TONY: GODDAMN ASS! MOTHER-CANDY-ASS NO-BLOCKIN' BITCHES! PLAYER: GET UP, CAP. SUCK IT UP, CAP. COME ON, MAN. CAN'T BREATHE! NEITHER CAN I. IT'S THE HUMIDITY. I GOT IT. YOU NEED A STRETCHER? DO I HAVE TO GET A STRETCHER FOR YOU? ARE YOU THAT OLD? (CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING) OH, NO, NO! WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! COME ON, YOU'RE NOT HURT ANYWHERE. COME ON, YOU'RE NOT HURT ANYWHERE. I'M DESTROYED! YOU SHOULD BE. YOU JUST BLED ON MY SUIT. ANNOUNCER: AND THERE GOES HISTORY. THAT'S THE REAL DEAL. 39-YEAR OLD CAP ROONEY. 2-TIME PANTHEON CUP WINNER, ALMOST 50,000 PASSING YARDS. NOW TO BE REPLACED BY SECOND-STRING QUARTERBACK TYLER CHERUBINI. NICE AND EASY. WE'RE UP, SEE? 21-17, RIGHT? JUST HOLD, HOLD ON. STEADY, OK? WHERE'S MY HELMET? HEY, GET HIM HIS HELMET. YOU'RE GONNA NEED THAT. ANNOUNCER: I'M NOT REALLY SURE HOW D'AMATO'S GONNA GET OVER THIS ONE, KEV. WAY TO HOLD THAT FOOTBALL, CAP. TAKE IT EASY. DON'T WORRY. I'LL BE... I'LL BE... WE'RE GONNA FINISH THIS ONE WITHOUT YOU. I'LL BE... ALL RIGHT. KEVIN: WITH 3 STRAIGHT LOSSES AND 3 GAMES LEFT UNTIL THE PLAYOFFS, THIS COULD SPELL THE END TO AN ALREADY DISMAL SEASON. ATTENDANCE HAS BEEN DOWN, WHILE THE CROSS-TOWN DOLPHINS HAVE PROSPERED. IT'S CALLED BAD-COACHING-DOT-COM, TONY'S WEB SITE. HORNY! YEAH, COACH? YOUR ZONE COVERAGE IS SOFT. PRESS IT. GET THAT SHIT OUTTA MY FACE! SHARK! WE GOTTA GET MORE PRESSURE ON THE GODDAMN QUARTERBACK. I'M ON IT, COACH. WELL, FIX IT! I'M ON IT. I SAID, FIX IT. I'M ON IT, GOD DAMN IT! KEVIN: THIS IS GONNA PUT THE SHARKS' PLAYOFF HOPES SQUARELY ON THE SHOULDERS OF JULIAN WASHINGTON, 'CAUSE BACKUP QUARTERBACK TYLER CHERUBINI HAS NOT SEEN A LOT OF ACTION RECENTLY. TUG: IT'S WORSE THAN THAT, KEV. TYLER CHERUBINI HAS NOT THROWN FOR A FIRST DOWN ALL SEASON. HUT! KEV: FUMBLE! NO! OH, MY GOSH! TOUCHDOWN. AND THE AMERICANS GO UP 23-21. MAN, OH, MAN, DID THEY NAIL HIM. AND IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE CHERUBINI'S GETTING UP. <BLEEP>! TUG: WELL, 2 QUARTERBACKS IN A ROW. I HAVE NOT SEEN THIS SINCE '88. OR WAS IT '78 WHEN THE AZTECS AND THE PHARAOHS-- ANY GIVEN SUNDAY, KEV. ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN. (STUTTERING) THEY NEED YOU BACK. CHERUBINI'S DOWN. CHERUBINI? WHAT, HE FALL OFF THE BENCH? WHAT THE HELL'S NEXT-- STIGMATA? OK, JUST SIT HIM OUT, AND DON'T TOUCH HIM TILL I GET BACK. VINCENT, GIVE ME THE NAMES OF WHO'S AVAILABLE OUT THERE IN THE QUARTERBACK MARKET. HOW ABOUT EVERY AVAILABLE LINE COACH, MAYBE SOMEBODY WHO CAN ACTUALLY TEACH THIS LINE HOW TO <BLEEP> BLOCK. (TSKING) MALLOY--FIND OUT ABOUT HIM. TUG: CAP'S OUT. OH, MAN, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. KEVIN: DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WILLIE BEAMEN? NO, I DON'T. WHO IS WILLIE BEAMEN? BEAMEN, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? I TOLD YOU TO WARM UP 5 MINUTES AGO! WHAT HAPPENED? LOOK AT YOUR FUCKING PLATE GUARD! IT'S UPSIDE DOWN! COME ON, GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS! LET'S GO! BEAMEN... OK, BEAMEN, YOU'RE UP. LEFT DEUCE ZIG, 22 TOMCAT. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS? EASY HAND-OFF TO JULIAN, OK? (OVER HEADSET) THE AMERICANS GOT NO PROFILE ON YOU. YOU CAN USE THAT TO SURPRISE THEM. SON, LOOK AT ME. LOOK AT ME! YOU'RE GONNA DO FINE. YOU HOLD IT ALL INSIDE. THERE. STAY FOCUSED. (HEADSET) WE'RE GONNA TAKE CARE OF YOU. WILLIE. WILLIE? CAN YOU HEAR ME? KEVIN: AS WE WAIT WORD ON CAP ROONEY'S CONDITION, MIAMI IS SENDING IN THIRD-STRING QUARTERBACK WILLIE BEAMEN. I'VE BEEN IN TOO MANY OF THESE. 26 YEARS OLD, A MYSTERY MAN. SEVENTH-ROUND PICK OUT OF DALLAS... YOU GOT WHEELS. USE YOUR FEET. IN HIS FIFTH YEAR. HE WENT TO THE UNIVERSITY OF HOUSTON. FIRST YEAR WITH THE SHARKS. HE'S SEEN 4 TEAMS IN HIS PROFESSIONAL CAREER. ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP. WE'RE GONNA RUN A LEFT DEUCE ZIG... 22 TOMCAT. ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? WHAT'S THE SNAP COUNT? (GAGGING) BEAMEN, WOULD YOU MAKE THE CALL ALREADY! YOU ALL RIGHT? OH, SHIT! THAT'S A FIRST. KEVIN: OH, JEEZ. TUG: OH, MY GOD! <BLEEP>, MAN! YOU PUKED ON THE LOGO. WHAT THE <BLEEP> IS WRONG? I GOTTA GET IN A 3-POINT STANCE IN YOUR VOMIT, <BLEEP>? ON 2! ON 2. BREAK. BREAK! BEAMEN! BEAMEN! I WANT YOU TO TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT ME. I'M GONNA BE THE NEXT <BLEEP> TO KNOCK YOU UP! THIS GONNA BE A LONG DAY TODAY! I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS ALL <BLEEP> DAY-- ALL <BLEEP> DAY. COME ON! SET! ON RED! 3, 78! (GROWLING) 66! HUT! HIKE! YOU BETTER GET USED TO THAT, <BLEEP>! I'LL BE PICKIN' PEANUTS OUTTA YOUR ASS! P.A. ANNOUNCER: FIRST DOWN! GREEN 78! HUT! HUT-HUT! AAAGH! (WHISTLE) SET! GREEN! 21! SET! GREEN! 21! CHANGE THE PLAY. AUDIBLE. CHANGE THE PLAY. CHECK IT! CHECK IT! RED! 70 BLACK STAR! BLACK STAR! BLACK STAR! RED! 70 BLACK STAR! WHERE'D YOU DREAM THAT UP, ROOK? RED! 70 BLACK STAR! - BLACK WHAT? WHAT THE <BLEEP> IS THAT?! HUT! TUG: LOOKS LIKE AN AUDIBLE, KEV. LOOKS LIKE A BROKEN PLAY. DAMN IT! (BRAKES SQUEALING, CAR CRASH) DOES HE KNOW ANY OF THESE PLAYS? GIVE HIM A CHANCE, ALL RIGHT? THE GUY KNOWS THE BASIC PACKAGE, BUT HE'S ONLY TAKEN A FEW SNAPS. WHAT THE <BLEEP> IS A RED 70 BLACK STAR? THERE IS NO SUCH <BLEEP> PLAY, MAN. YEAH, I JUST FIGURED THAT OUT, J. WELL, <BLEEP>, MAN. BUT THERE SHOULD BE ONE. THAT'S THE FUTURE OF THE TEAM. SET! BLUE! 88! BLUE! 88! UNLESS YOU'RE GONNA KISS ME, SUGAR, GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY ASS. THAT'S THE SAME THING YOUR GIRL TOLD ME LAST NIGHT. HURRY! HURRY! HURRY UP! HURRY UP! BLUE! 16! SET! KEVIN: HE'S GOT SANDERSON OPEN DOWN FIELD! SANDERSON MAKES A MOVE! BEAMEN HAS TIME! HE LETS IT GO! INTERCEPTION! NO! SHIT! NO! INTERCEPTION BY GATES! (WHISTLE) TUG: LISTEN, THAT WAS BOUND TO HAPPEN, THE WAY THIS KID'S BEEN MOVING. TOO FAST. HE'S WAY AHEAD OF HIS RECEIVER. HE'S NERVOUS. KEVIN: AND IT'S MINNESOTA 24, AND MIAMI 21 AT THE HALF. TRY AN ENEMA. I DON'T GIVE A SHIT. WHEN THIS CORNER'S COMING UP, OK? I WANT YOU TO DROP BACK. GOD DAMN IT. WE GOT THE THIRD-STRING QUARTERBACK THAT AIN'T GONNA PRODUCE SHIT. AND WHEN I'M TALKIN' ABOUT DEFENCE, GOD DAMN IT, YOU'RE DUMB ENOUGH, WE MADE IT SIMPLE ENOUGH. WE MADE THIS SHIT REAL <BLEEP> SIMPLE. 101, YOU LIGHT-HEADED? I WAS LIGHT-HEADED AT KICK-OFF, DOC. NOW I'M ABOUT "ONE FOOT IN THE <BLEEP> COFFIN" STAGE. JUST A COUPLE QUARTS LOW. YOU NEED AN OIL CHANGE, MADMAN. THEN WHY ARE MY LEGS ONE BIG <BLEEP> KNOT? I NEED SOME VICODIN. I NEED SOME CYCLOBENZAPRINE. I NEED SOME-- PUT THAT ON YOUR NOSE. HARVEY, CAN I SPEAK TO YOU FOR A SECOND? I'M WORRIED ABOUT CAP. HE'S LOSING ANKLE STRENGTH. WHAT DID YOU DO? YOU EXAMINED HIM? YEAH. OLLIE, YOU ARE ACTUALLY ONE OF THE FEW RELATIVES THAT I CAN STOMACH, BUT YOU'RE THE INTERNIST. I'M THE ORTHOPAEDIST, REMEMBER? BONE, MUSCLE, JOINT--ME. RUNNY NOSE, DIARRHOEA, GONORRHOEA, PINKEYE--YOU. GOT IT? THANKS. HEY, BAD NEWS, CAP. YOU'RE OK. IT'S JUST A BRUISE. NO RIBS BROKEN. YOUR BACK FILM'S NORMAL. NO, NO, NO, NO. SOMETHING'S DEFINITELY WRONG HERE, HARV. MY BUTT IS JUST KILLING ME, MAN. I'LL SEND YOU OVER FOR AN MRI, IN CASE. DOC! DOC! PULL THE PIPES, MAN. CAN YOU-- I GOTTA GO, MAN. CALL OF THE WILD. OUTTA MY WAY! SHARKS FOOTBALL! WHATEVER IT TAKES. (CACOPHONY OF SHOUTING VOICES) PLACE KICKER, OUT OF THE WAY. I'M GONNA TAKE A DUMP NOW, UNLESS YOU WANNA BE CAUGHT IN A SHIT STORM. DON'T BEND YOUR ELBOWS. DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO! DON'T BEND YOUR ELBOWS. (LOUD EVACUATION) OH, LORD! SIT DOWN! COME ON! LISTEN UP! WHO WAS THAT YOU WAS THROWIN' TO, THE RECEIVER? OR YOU GOT SOME OTHER SHIT ON YOUR MIND? WE JUST LOST 2 GODDAMN QUARTERBACKS IN ONE HALF OF FOOTBALL BECAUSE OUR LINE COULDN'T PICK UP A BACKSIDE BANDIT ON MAX PROTECTION. ALL WEEK LONG WE WORK ON THE CALLS OVER, OVER, OVER AGAIN. YOU ARE NOT <BLEEP> FOCUSED! MCKENNA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? YOU GOTTA KEEP YOUR HEAD ON A SWIVEL, MAN. YOU GOTTA SLIDE OUT THERE, PICK UP THAT ROBBER. WE ROLL UP THOSE OUTSIDE LINEBACKERS. BEAMEN. KNOW YOUR SITE ADJUSTMENTS. UNDERSTAND? SANDERSON AND FOX WILL BREAK OFF THEIR ROUTES, BUT YOU GOTTA BE THERE. YOU GOTTA DELIVER IT. 2 GODDAMN TURNOVERS IN ONE HALF. (PLAYERS CHATTER) OK. DEFENCE. THIS IS WHAT WE GOTTA DO HERE. UH...I DON'T KNOW. YOU GOTTA DO SOMETHING. YOU GOTTA DO SOMETHING OUT THERE. YOU GOTTA MAKE IT HAPPEN. I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING. STOP FLYING AROUND THE <BLEEP> BALL. DO SOMETHING. TACKLE SOMEBODY. DON'T LET THESE GUYS CHEW UP THE GODDAMN CLOCK ON US. LOOK, WHEN WE PUT 8 IN THE BOX, YOU GOTTA JAM THOSE RECEIVERS. I DON'T CARE. IF YOU MAKE MISTAKES, MAKE 'EM BIG. I DON'T GIVE A <BLEEP>. I'M NOT GONNA EAT YOUR LUNCH FOR THAT. ALL RIGHT. WE GOT P.J., MAC, BEASTMAN, HORNY, SHARK. ONE, 2 YARDS LESS EACH TIME, THEY'RE GONNA BE LOOKING AT SECOND AND 8 INSTEAD OF SECOND AND 6. WE'RE ONLY DOWN BY 3. WE CAN WIN THIS MOTHER. PLAYERS: YEAH! (ENTHUSIASTIC PLAYER CHATTER) UH... WE GOT 3 LOSSES IN A ROW! I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS. ARE YOU? PLAYERS: YEAH! YEAH! 'CAUSE IF YOU'RE NOT, RAISE YOUR HAND. COME ON, IF YOU'RE GONNA ACT LIKE A LOSER, RAISE YOUR HAND. IF YOU'RE GONNA ACT LIKE A PUSSY, RAISE YOUR HAND. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, J? I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO BE THE ONLY PUSSY WITH HIS HAND RAISED, SO I FIGURED I'D HELP YOU OUT. (LAUGHTER) OK. GENTLEMEN! THIS IS WHERE WE LIVE. WE'RE NOT GONNA LET 'EM <BLEEP> WITH US IN OUR OWN HOUSE, ARE WE? PLAYERS: NO! LET'S GO OUT THERE AND KICK SOME SECOND-HALF BUTT! (PUMPED-UP CHATTER) (WARRIOR YELL) HUT! KEVIN: HE'S GOING BACK, UNDER PRESSURE. LOOKING... LOOKING... HE SEES AN OPENING. OH, YEAH! WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! WE GOT A DANCE PLANNED FOR YOU! PAYBACK'S A BITCH! <BLEEP>! REFEREE: COME ON, LET HIM UP! I'LL <BLEEP> KILL YOU, SON OF A BITCH! DAMN IT, NICK! GET THIS GUY UNDER CONTROL. SETTLE HIM DOWN. SLOT LEFT 90. GO Z READ. SLOT LEFT 90. GO Z READ. HERE WE GO. SETTLE DOWN. SETTLE DOWN. OH, SHIT! WE GOT IT BACK. WE GOT IT BACK. TIME OUT. TIME OUT. P.A. ANNOUNCER: TIME OUT, MIAMI. CHRISTINA: IT LOOKS LIKE SURGERY ON HIS LOWER BACK, BUT I'M TOLD HE COULD MAKE IT BACK BY PLAYOFFS. WHAT'S WRONG, WILLIE? WHAT'S WRONG? EVERYTHING'S JUST MOVING SO FAST, COACH. BELIEVE ME WHEN I TELL YOU THIS. YOU CAN ONLY GET BETTER. I KNOW. AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT GETTING THE HOOK, BECAUSE... I GOT NO ONE LEFT. OK? COACH, I'M PLAYING LIKE SHIT. I AIN'T PLAYING LIKE MYSELF. COME ON, YOU KNOW HOW TO PLAY THIS GAME. YOU'VE PLAYED THIS GAME YOUR WHOLE LIFE. RIGHT. - YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? WHERE--YOU GREW UP IN DALLAS, RIGHT? RIGHT? - YEAH. SO MAYBE YOU'RE BACK IN DALLAS RIGHT NOW. I MEAN, YOU'RE HOME, YOU'RE ENJOYING YOURSELF. YOU'RE BACK IN THE HOOD, JUST BEFORE YOUR MAMA CALLS YOU IN FOR DINNER. I SAY, GO TO THE BUICK, TURN AROUND, I'LL THROW IT TO YOU. REMEMBER THAT? YEAH, SOMETHING LIKE THAT. THE POINT OF WHAT I'M SAYING, WILLIE, IS YOU GOTTA FORGET IT ALL-- THE CROWD, THE AUDIBLES, THE GODDAMN PLAYBOOK. JUST FOCUS ON THIS NEXT ONE PASS. GO TO THE BUICK, TURN AROUND. TURN AROUND. ALL RIGHT, BABY. ENJOY IT. THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE HERE FOR. NO, NO, NO. WAIT. SLOT. SLOT. THROW IT. THROW IT. (NO SOUND IS HEARD) COACH: FORGET THE GODDAMN PLAYBOOK. JUST FOCUS ON THIS ONE NEXT PASS. HIKE! HE'S GOT IT! HE'S GOT IT! TUG: TOUCHDOWN! SANDERSON! AND WHAT A FEELING IT MUST BE FOR YOUNG WILLIE BEAMEN. IT'S HIS FIRST AFFA TOUCHDOWN, KEVIN, AND IT LOOKS LIKE THE SHARKS ARE BACK IN THE BALL GAME. LET'S GO KICK SOME EXTRA POINT, DOG! LET'S GET OFF THE FIELD, MAN. HE CAUGHT IT, RIGHT? WHERE DID WE FIND THIS GUY, JOHNNY? I THINK ARNIE SPOTTED HIM... BEFORE HE LEFT. (RAUCOUS CHEERING) (HEAVY METAL MUSIC PLAYING OVER P.A.) KEVIN: D'AMATO'S GOTTA GO FOR IT HERE. IF HE GETS THE FIRST DOWN, HE CAN RUN OUT THE CLOCK. WHY IS HE CALLING THESE PLAYS? NICK: I CAN'T GET IN HIS FACE. TELL HIM HE'S GOT TO TAKE A CHANCE. I'M DOING MY BEST, MISS P. TURN UP THE VOLUME, NICK! RED BEATS REED. THEY'RE GIVING US THE FLAT. LET'S RUN SMOKE AND THROW. TONY: MIGHT BE LOOKING FOR THE PICK. HEY, I'M NOT TAKING ANY CHANCES, NOT WITH THIS BALLERINA. HIKE! P.A. ANNOUNCER: THIRD DOWN AND 5, MIAMI. TONY, THEY'RE SCREAMING FOR HIM TO DUMP IT OUT THERE. IT'S WIDE OPEN. I KNOW THIS COACH, NICK, AND HE'S A PRICK. THAT LOSS IS A SET-UP. I'VE SEEN THIS BEFORE. WE'LL RUN IT AGAIN. NICK: TONY. LET'S DO IT. COME ON. OK. LET'S DO DEUCE LEFT, 22. RED 22, DEUCE READ. THE SAME PLAY? KEVIN: THIRD DOWN, 5 TO GO. LESS THAN 2 MINUTES LEFT IN THE GAME. ALL THE SHARKS HAVE TO DO IS HOLD ON TO THE BALL. ALL RIGHT, IT'S MONEY TIME, BOYS. GIMME 5. WE HOME AND DRY AND FLYIN' HIGH. LET THE D WIN IT, J MAN. WE DON'T NEED NO FIRST DOWN, MAN. THAT'S WHY YOU DON'T SCORE WITH THE LADIES. OK. 22 RED... SAME PLAY. SAME PLAY. ON 2. READY! DIG! DIG! TONY. TONY, CALL TIME OUT. THEY'RE STACKED UP AGAINST THE RUN. TIME OUT'S FOR TV. NEGATIVE. COME ON. GREEN 48! KEVIN: BEAMEN STEPS UNDER CENTRE. THE RED D'S READY. HUT! HIKE! KEVIN: FUMBLE! OHH! YOU SAW THE FUMBLE! WOW! LOOSE BALL! LOOSE BALL! MINNESOTA'S GOT IT! TUG: HOW STUPID! HOW SELFISH! JULIAN WASHINGTON FUMBLES THE BALL! IN YOUR FACE! KEVIN: YOU HAVE TO WONDER IF THE $1 MILLION BONUS HE GETS WHEN HE REACHES 1,500 YARDS DIDN'T PLAY INTO THAT ONE. TUG: THAT'S RIGHT, KEV. AND NOW D'AMATO'S LOST 4 GAMES IN A ROW. CHRISTINA: 2 HANDS! 2 HANDS, YOU SHOWBOAT! HONEY...HONEY, PLEASE DON'T FEEL TOO BAD, OK? WE LOST ONCE. ALL OF A SUDDEN, ONE OF THESE... REAL TALL GENTLEMEN JUMPED UP SO HIGH... AND HE JUST PICKED THAT THING OUTTA THAT AIR JUST LIKE THAT. AND I THOUGHT YOUR DADDY...HA HA HA... I THOUGHT HE WAS GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK! OH, I TELL YOU... MAN: POGO IS VERY DEPRESSED HERE. HE DIED 'CAUSE OF THIS. I DON'T WANT YOU TO TAKE ANYTHING SO SERIOUSLY, HONEY. IT'S JUST A GAME, HONEY. GOOD NIGHT, MOTHER. GOOD NIGHT, DARLING. MAN: AT LEAST THE DOG STILL LOVES HER. (SIGHS) MAKE SURE SHE GETS HOME, ALL RIGHT? NO STOPS. YOU NEEDN'T WORRY. SHALL I WAIT UP? NO. I'D BE A LOUSY DATE TONIGHT. DON'T FORGET I'M IN BOSTON TOMORROW FOR 2 DAYS. IS THAT TOMORROW? MAYBE 3. IT'S A COMPLICATED DEPOSITION FOR THE INSURANCE COMPANY. FOR THE INSURANCE COMPANY. I'M SORRY. I FORGOT. YOU FORGOT? KICK THEIR ASSES. JOHNNY, TOMORROW MORNING, FIRST THING-- UH...MAKE IT 3. YEAH. YOU WANNA WALK THROUGH OR, UH, JOG-WALK THROUGH? LET IT GO, WILLIE. YOU PLAYED STRONG. I'M JUST SICK OF LOSIN', MAN. WELL, WHEN YOU'RE MY AGE, YOU GET USED TO IT. ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, LISTEN UP! PLAYED YOUR HEARTS OUT THERE TODAY. NO--NO BLAME, NOBODY. LET'S TAKE A KNEE. FATHER. YOU AND I HAVE BEEN IN SOME TOUGH PLACES TOGETHER, HAVEN'T WE? I WENT TO MY PLAYBOOK. AND THE BOOK SAYS THE RAIN FALLS ON THE JUST AND THE UNJUST ALIKE. NOW, WE JUST LOST 4 IN A ROW. THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT WE'RE SPECIALLY CURSED. NOW, JOY COMES IN THE MORNING. THERE ARE NO ATHEISTS IN FOXHOLES. LET'S PRAY. OUR FATHER... TEAM: ...WHO ART IN HEAVEN. HOW YOU DOING, ROCK? (GROANS) AH. FELT LIKE I WAS GOING TO DIE. THEY WENT IN, THEY... THEY SUCKED OUT MY DISK. IT'S NO BIG DEAL. DID WE WIN? BEAT US BY 3. WHAT'D THE KID THROW? 9 OF 14 FOR 176. (GRUNTS) TDS? 2. HOLY MOLEY. AAH! GOD! AAH! I CAN--I CAN-- I CAN BEAT THIS. (GROANS) AH... CINDY, WILL YOU PLEASE CALL THAT NURSE?! THIS DOESN'T WORK! I'M A FOOTBALL PLAYER! THEY GOTTA PUMP UP THE VOLUME HERE! YES, NO ONE'S SHOWN UP YET... BREATHE. COME ON, DON'T OVERACHIEVE. EVEN AT 50%, THERE'S NOBODY OUT THERE BETTER. PLAYOFFS. I'LL BE READY. OK. IT'S GETTIN' LATE. I'M GONNA STOP BY IN THE MORNIN', ALL RIGHT? YOU GET SOME REST. GOOD NIGHT, CINDY. GOOD NIGHT. (GROANS) TONY... DON'T YOU GIVE UP ON ME. HEY... YOU'RE LIKE A SON TO ME, CAP. I'LL FIGHT FOR YOU TILL THE DAY I DIE. 1 WILLIE'S MOM, ON PHONE: WILLIE BEAMEN, I DON'T BELIEVE YOU. YOUR FIRST BIG FOOTBALL GAME ON TELEVISION, AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN LET YOUR OWN MAMA KNOW! MA, OK, HERE IT IS RIGHT HERE. NOT THAT WILLIE DIDN'T HAVE SOME NAUSEATING MOMENTS OF HIS OWN... OH, WILLIE! MOTHER: ...ON NATIONAL TELEVISION! EECH! POOR GUY. ARE YOU GONNA START? YOU COULD AT LEAST PLAY FIRST STRING. NO, PROBABLY NOT. ...BEAMEN BRINGS HIS TUMS WITH HIM-- YOU SHOULD BE STARTING. LOOK, MOM, I'M NUMBER 3, AND THERE AIN'T NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT. NUMBER 3? YOU'VE BEEN AT THIS THING FOR 5 OR 6 YEARS. TELL EVERYBODY DOWN THERE I SAID I LOVE 'EM, AND I'LL SEE 'EM, ALL RIGHT? I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU. BYE. OH, BABY. SHE JUST WANTS THE BEST FOR YOU. YEAH. I KNOW SHE DOES. YOU DID GREAT! ` BABY, LET'S CRUISE ` ` AWAY ` ` FROM HERE ` ROSE: ...WHY D'AMATO WOULD CALL THAT PLAY WHEN EVERYBODY IN THE WHOLE STADIUM KNOWS THAT J-MAN LIKES TO PICK HIS SPOT WHEN HE RUNS. AND YOU'RE CALLIN' THE SAME PLAY 2 TIMES IN A ROW. WHAT IS THAT ABOUT? LOOK, THERE'S A VERY GOOD REASON WHY THIS TEAM HAS LOST 4 GAMES IN A ROW. MAN ON TV: HA HA HA HA... ...AND FORGET ABOUT CAP AND FORGET ABOUT THE MONEY GRUBBING GREED-HEAD, CHRISTINA PAGNIACCI. HELLO, GENIUS! THE FACT OF THE MATTER IS THAT THIS GUY STARTED COACHING BACK IN THE LATE SIXTIES! I'M GLAD HE'S NOT TALKIN' ABOUT ME. HERE YOU GO, COACH. HEAR ME WHEN I SPEAK. THIS IS A TEAM WITH MORE THAN 200 VARIATIONS ON THE PASS, FOR GOD'S SAKE. NAPOLEON D'AMATO'S PLAYBOOK'S GOT LESS THAN 75 PLAYS IN IT TOTAL! 75! 200 VARIATIONS ON A PASS. WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE, FRANK? WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE? HEY, YOU'RE THAT COACH, RIGHT? YEAH. I'M MANDY. MANDY MURPHY. OH, YEAH? YEAH. YOU LOOK MUCH BETTER IN REAL LIFE. YOU'RE ALWAYS YELLING AT PEOPLE ON TV. YEAH. LEAST I LOOK BETTER THAN THAT OLD FART UP THERE. I THINK. YOU DO. SO...HOW--HOW OLD ARE YOU? I DON'T THINK AGE MATTERS. I THINK OLDER GUYS HAVE A CERTAIN THING. YEAH. I'VE WANTED TO MEET YOU SINCE I WAS 16. YOU WERE ON THE SIDELINES. YOU WERE WINNING THIS BIG GAME. AH, THE PANTHEON CUP. YEAH. YEAH! THAT WAS IT. GOD, THAT'S SO WILD. SO YOU PROMISE TO KEEP A SECRET? OH, YEAH, UH... (WHISPERING) WELL... I DON'T KNOW. WHAT--HOW DO YOU MEAN? ON A DATE? HMM... I GOT A PLACE. IT'S CLOSE BY. IT'S QUIET. IT'S 1,000. 5,000 FOR THE NIGHT. YOU WON'T REGRET IT. I'M FLATTERED. THANK YOU, BUT, UH... BUT I, UH... I GOT FRIENDS. I COULD DO YOUR FRIENDS, TOO. SOME OTHER TIME, MAYBE. YEAH, FAIR ENOUGH. WELL, GOOD LUCK WITH THE TEAM. I'LL BE ROOTING FOR YOU. THANK YOU. COACH. YEAH. MM-MM-MM. I KNOW YOU'RE NOT GONNA PASS ON THAT, D'AMATO. I MUST BE DRUNK. TV: FORGET ABOUT THE MONEY-GRUBBING GREED-HEAD CHRISTINA PAGNIACCI, WHO'S SO SMART THAT SHE SOLD 3 OF LAST YEAR'S STARTERS DURING THE OFF SEASONS. YOU CAN DEFINITELY FORGET ABOUT... YOU THINK YOU CAN LOSE YOUR COACHING INSTINCTS? YOU NEVER HAD 'EM. HOW YOU GONNA LOSE 'EM? ALL I GOT ARE MY INSTINCTS. IF I LOSE THOSE... I GOT NOTHIN'... I GOT NOTHIN'... (TELEPHONE RINGS) (RING) ANSWERING MACHINE: PLEASE LEAVE YOUR NAME AND A MESSAGE, AND WE'LL GET RIGHT BACK TO YOU. HAVE A NICE DAY. BYE-BYE. (BEEP) TONY: SO, JEANETTE, I WAS HOPING YOU'D BE AWAKE. WH-WHAT TIME IS IT OUT THERE, ANYWAY? AH, NEVER MIND. COULD YOU...TELL TOMMY THAT I'M GONNA BE IN L.A. IN A COUPLE OF WEEKS. WE GOT A GAME... AND I REALLY--I'D LIKE TO GET TOGETHER WITH HIM... BUT I DON'T HAVE HIS NEW NUMBER. YOU KNOW? I REALLY MISS THE SHIT OUT OF LITTLE TIMMY AND MELINDA. AND... AND YOU. JEANETTE? GRANDKIDS. WE GOT GRANDKIDS. HUH? HA! OH...WHY'D WE EVER GET DIVORCED, ANYWAY? (CRASH) AW, FUCK. (TELEPHONE BEEPS) RECORDING: IF YOU'D LIKE TO MAKE A CALL, PLEASE HANG UP AND TRY AGAIN. IF YOU NEED HELP, HANG UP AND THEN DIAL YOUR OPERATOR. OH, SHIT! (OVERLAPPING SHOUTING) GO! GO, GO, GO, GO, GO! GET IT! GET IT! GET IT! (WHISTLE BLOWS) LET'S DRIVE IT! LET'S DRIVE IT! CHICAGO IS WAITING. WE'RE GONNA MAKE A DIFFERENCE THIS WEEK. JUST THE TIP OF THE BALL. JUST THE TIP OF THE BALL. TOUCH IT, TOUCH IT, TOUCH IT, TOUCH IT... THIS AIN'T NO BULLSHIT WEST VIRGINIA. YOU IN THE BIG LEAGUES HERE. UHH! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT, MAN? WHAT ARE YOU, A PUSSY? THAT AIN'T NO DAMN HIT. 14 YEARS, I KNOW HOW TO HIT. YOU, 14 YEARS, YOU THE CAPTAIN OF THIS GODDAMNED TEAM. THE REASON I'M GONNA LOSE MY GODDAMNED JOB. SHOW ME! BREAK THAT SHIT UP! GOD DAMN IT, BABY, YOU DID IT, MAN. THAT'S MY BOY! MY BROTHERFUCKER! THAT'S THE WAY TO HIT, SHARK. THAT IS THE WAY TO HIT. NOW, Y'ALL COME ON IN HERE. COME ON IN HERE AND LET ME TELL YOU... CHRISTINA: SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. THE GOVERNOR OF CALIFORNIA IS SAYING THAT THERE IS NOTHING FOR THE PUBLIC TO VOTE ON? THAT'S WHAT SHE'S SAYING. SHE'S GOT THE FINANCES TO BUILD A NEW STADIUM IN LOS ANGELES, USING LOTTERY MONEY. OH, JESUS, ED. L.A.'S A DREAM. GO! ED: IT'S CERTAINLY GOOD ENOUGH TO LEVERAGE THE CITY OF MIAMI INTO A NEW STADIUM. WHAT ABOUT THE ROSENTHAL BID? CHRISTINA: 250 MILLION? IT'S SO LOW. WITH A NEW STADIUM AND A WINNING TEAM, THIS CLUB IS WORTH 800 MILLION. HAVE YOU GOT SOME SLEAZY LITTLE DEAL IN L.A.? IT'S ME--D'AMATO! CHRISTINA, YOU'RE LIKE YOUR DAD. YOU'RE A DREAMER. TAKE THE MONEY. YOU'RE STILL YOUNG, DARLING. START OVER. START A FAMILY. (DOORBELL RINGS) YOU DON'T LOVE FOOTBALL, ANYWAY. IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, ED. LET'S KEEP THIS BETWEEN THE 3 OF US, OK? GOOD MORNING, TONY. GOOD MORNING, CHRISTINA. TONY. ED. CHRISTINA: ALKA-SELTZER? NO, THANK YOU. I HAD ABOUT 4 FOR BREAKFAST. THIS IS A HELL OF A LOSS, TONY. YOU KNOW, I CAN SEE HOW MY MOM COULD DRINK HERSELF INTO A STUPOR, WATCHING FOOTBALL GAMES ALL HER LIFE. BUT, I MEAN, THIS KIND OF PLAY MAKES ME WANT TO JUMP OUT OF A FUCKING WINDOW, TONY. WELL, YOU CAN RUN THIS A MILLION TIMES, CHRISTY, BUT, YOU KNOW, ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY-- "YOU'RE GONNA EITHER WIN OR YOU'RE GONNA LOSE. THE POINT IS, CAN YOU WIN OR LOSE LIKE A MAN?" DAD SAID A LOT OF CATCHY THINGS. NO, ACTUALLY, I SAID THAT, BUT WHO'S COUNTING? BUT HE COULD NEVER STAND LOSING, COULD HE? AND JULIAN COULDN'T RESIST GOING FOR HIS BONUS YARDS. BLAME ME, NOT JULIAN. THAT WAS MY CALL. I KNOW IT WAS, TONY. IT'S 4 IN A ROW. THIS SEASON IS A DISASTER. TONY, WITHOUT THE PLAYOFFS, THERE'S NO MORE TV MONEY. YOU SEE THIS? I MEAN, THEY WANT YOUR HEAD. YOUR FATHER WOULD LAUGH AT THOSE GUYS. THIS IS A GOOD FOOTBALL TEAM. MONROE: WE HIT, WE WIN. WE PUT PRESSURE, WE WIN. WE PENETRATE, WE WIN. YOU DO IT AS TOUGH AS IT IS POSSIBLE TO DO. AND YOU DO THAT IN ALL THINGS. YOU DIE HARD! THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT. YOU DIE HARD. DAD USED TO SAY, "NO INTENSITY, NO VICTORY." WHERE THE HELL IS YOUR INTENSITY, TONY? 4 YEARS AGO, WE WON THE PANTHEON CUP! I WAS THERE, CHRISTINA. I REMEMBER. NOW WHAT ARE WE? WE'RE A SECOND-TIER TEAM, THAT'S WHAT. WE'RE NOT A SECOND-TIER TEAM. ADMIT IT, TONY. YOU'RE NOT BEING HONEST. WE'RE A SOLID FOOTBALL TEAM. WE'RE JUST NOT INSPIRED. TOO MANY FREE AGENTS. WE GOT JULIAN. HE'S A MERC. THE END OF THE SEASON, HE'S GONE. NEXT YEAR, WE REBUILD OUR RUNNING GAME AND WE START-- YOU ALWAYS TALK ABOUT A RUNNING GAME, BUT, TONY, WHO GIVES A SHIT AS LONG AS YOU'RE WINNING? PEOPLE WANT TO SEE PASSES, TOUCHDOWNS, HIGH SCORES. THAT'S THE GAME TODAY. I PAID A LOT OF MONEY TO GET NICK CROZIER HERE FROM MINNESOTA, SPECIFICALLY TO MODERNISE THIS OFFENCE. FOOTBALL'S PLAYED ON A FIELD, CHRISTINA, NOT IN THE GODDAMN BOXES. YOU KNEW THAT WHEN YOU HAD CANDY STUCK IN YOUR BRACES. YOU HAVE LOTS TO TALK ABOUT, SO-- IF WE'D HAVE GOTTEN THE LINEMEN I WANTED IN THE FIRST PLACE, MAYBE OUR FIRST 2 QUARTERBACKS WOULD STILL BE WALKING. TONY, THINK OF THE FUTURE. DO YOU KNOW WHAT WE COULD GET FOR CAP RIGHT NOW? ASSISTANT COACH: GO! CHRISTINA: PROBABLY A SECOND AND THIRD DRAFT CHOICE. WE KNOW THAT HE'S FINISHED. BUT IF WE-- NO, I DON'T KNOW THAT, CHRISTY. I DON'T KNOW THAT CAP IS FINISHED. DO I HAVE TO REMIND YOU THAT HE HELPED BUILD THIS FRANCHISE? HE'S A GODDAMN HERO TO THE WORKING PEOPLE OF FLORIDA AND PROBABLY ONE OF THE GREATEST PRESSURE PLAYERS OF ALL TIME. YOU DON'T JUST CUT A MAN LIKE CAP ROONEY. CAP AND SHARK WERE GREAT, BUT MEMORIES DON'T PASS AND TACKLE LIKE THEY USED TO. SHARK CHANGED LINEBACKING FOREVER! HE MADE A QUANTUM LEAP IN THE GAME! THAT'S WHY WE'LL SAY GOODBYE TO BOTH OF THEM... WITH DIGNITY, WITH CLASS. WE'LL GIVE THEM POSITIONS IN THE FRONT OFFICE-- I'M NOT GONNA CUT CAP ROONEY OR SHARK LAVAY, NO MATTER HOW MUCH CLASS YOU DO IT WITH. NOW, MY CONTRACT'S VERY CLEAR ON THIS POINT, CHRISTY. I COACH MY WAY. WE MAKE LESS MONEY THAN 90% OF THE OTHER TEAMS. I MEAN, THE ECONOMICS-- OH, FUCK THE ECONOMICS! YOUR FATHER--YOU HEAR ME? YOUR FATHER DIDN'T INTERFERE. HE MADE IT WORK. THAT'S BECAUSE YOU WERE A FIGHTER. YOU HAD INTENSITY. AS MUCH AS I RESPECT... MY FAMOUS UNCLE TONY... THE PLAYERS ARE JUST NOT RESPONDING TO YOU. (TV PLAYING INDISTINCTLY) TONY, ART, MAY HE REST IN PEACE, SPENT MONEY LIKE WATER. BUT IN THE MODERN GAME, WITH THE MARKETING COSTS-- LISTEN, I WILL DO ANYTHING, ANYTHING, TO BRING THIS TEAM BACK TO GREATNESS. I GUESS I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT, HUH? THAT WAS ALL YOUR DAD. OK. AM I EXCUSED NOW? JEEZ, WHO'S PLAYING THE CHILD NOW? EVERYBODY'S GOT TO RENEGOTIATE, AND THAT MEANS YOU, TOO. ARE YOU SAYING MY CONTRACT'S UP AT THE END OF THE SEASON? THE ECONOMICS AREN'T THERE? IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE SAYING? YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT GIVING ME A WHOLE LOT TO WORK WITH. YOU KNOW HOW YOUR DAD AND I NEGOTIATED MY CONTRACT? WE HAD A BEER. SHOOK HANDS. WELL, I DON'T DRINK BEER, TONY. NO, I DON'T IMAGINE YOU DO, NO. 1 ANNOUNCER: 14-3, CHICAGO, SECOND QUARTER, 8 MINUTES LEFT. BRANSON: OH, MAN, BAD, BAD PASS. SO THIS HAS BEEN A TOUGH START FOR TYLER CHERUBINI, WHO HAS YET TO FIND HIS RHYTHM. MAN: YOU SUCK! ANNOUNCER: WHILE WE HAVE THIS MOMENT... TYLER, WE'RE IN MIAMI. YOU'RE THROWIN' THE FUCKIN' BALL TO GEORGIA. IT'S JUST NOT CLICKIN'. YOUR OFFENCE-- NO, NOT NOW. LATER, LATER. JUST, UH, REST IT UP. COME ON. COACH, I CAN GET IT DONE. I KNOW YOU CAN. NOT NOW. GOD DAMN IT! WHAT'S GOIN' ON? LET'S STOP THESE SON OF BITCHES! COME ON! 4, 3, COVER, 3, READY! SUCK IT UP! KNEEL, HIKE! KNEEL, HIKE! B.J., I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS! THAT $4 MILLION BONUS BABY'S ASS! AND THEN I'M GOIN' IN THE STANDS AND KICK BOTH YOUR MAMA'S ASSES! GO! GO! IT'S A FUMBLE, COACH. WE GOT THE BALL. IT'S OURS. WE GOT THE BALL! GET ME BEAMEN. PUT BEAMEN IN. FEEL LIKE THROWING UP? NO, NO. LAST TIME YOU PUKED, YOU HAD A HELL OF A GAME. YOU MAKE A RITUAL OUT OF IT, PEOPLE ARE GONNA RESPECT YOU FOR IT. WE'RE GONNA GO AT 'EM, WE'RE GONNA GO WITH THE SCRIPT. COME HERE. FOCUS. ALL RIGHT, COACH. CONCENTRATION. DOWNFIELD-- YOU KNOW I CAN-- DOWNFIELD, DOWNFIELD. EVERY INCH. EVERY INCH. YOU SEE IT BEFORE YOU DO IT. YOU SEE IT, YOU DO IT. ALL RIGHT, I GOT IT. I FEEL IT, COACH. I WAS JUST WONDERIN' WHY Y'ALL WAS TAKIN' SO LONG. WE'RE ABOUT TO LET THIS ONE SLIP AWAY. WELL, THEN GO AHEAD. LET'S GO. MAKE ME A BELIEVER! BRANSON: 14-3, CHICAGO. SECOND QUARTER, 3 MINUTES LEFT. SET! GREEN! 68, HIKE! TUG: BEAMEN'S GOT THE BALL. HE'S GOT ROOM TO RUN. LOOK AT HIM GO! TONY: HE'S CARRYING THAT THING LIKE A LOAF OF BREAD. TUG: THIS KID CAN MOVE. HE'S GOT SOME FLEXIBILITY. YEAH! ALL RIGHT! TUG: WOW! HE'S GOT GENIUS ANKLES. LOOK AT HIM GO. WELL, ALL RIGHT, BABY. THAT'S WHAT WE NEED. YEAH! ANNOUNCER: A 57-YARD CARRY BY WILLIE BEAMEN... WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING? ALL THE WAY TO... WILL SOMEBODY TEACH THIS KID HOW TO SLIDE, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE? HE'S GONNA KILL HIMSELF. HE'S GONNA KILL HIMSELF. (SHOUTING) I DON'T NEED ANOTHER JULIAN OUT THERE, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'? YEAH, TONY, I UNDERSTAND. TUG: AND THERE GOES BREAKFAST. HE SEEMED CONFUSED. WHAT'S HE CONFUSED ABOUT? WHAT'S--WHAT'S 60 BRAVO? RED DRAW, REGULAR GROUP. MONEY PLAY. RED DRAW, REGULAR GROUP. MONEY PLAY. (ALL TALKING AT ONCE) THAT WAS YOUR PLAY. TWINS RIGHT, 3 ZIG, 88 THROW BALL ON ONE. READY? BREAK! BREAK! BEAMEN WALKS TO THE LINE OF SCRIMMAGE. 3 MINUTES LEFT. 14-3, CHICAGO. (SHOUTING) GREEN, 68, HIKE! (CROWD CHEERING) TUG: TOUCHDOWN, MIAMI! I'M TELLING YOU, I DON'T KNOW WHAT HE'S DOING. I DIDN'T CALL THAT PLAY. MY TOUCHDOWN! IT WAS YOURS. IT WAS YOURS. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT? THAT WAS A BOOTLEG. I KNOW IT WAS A GODDAMN BOOTLEG. I'M GLAD WE DON'T HAVE A MICROPHONE DOWN THERE, UH, KEV, BECAUSE I SURE WOULDN'T WANT TO BE ON TONY D'AMATO'S DARK SIDE RIGHT NOW. I CALLED A REGULAR 22 FOX. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS, SON? YEAH, I KNOW WHAT THAT IS. YOU RUN THE PLAYS, I CALL THEM. YOU WITH ME, SON? YEAH, I'M WITH YOU, BOSS. I'M WITH YOU. DMX: YOU WON'T TAKE THIS FROM ME, BABY! YOU WILL NOT TAKE THIS FROM ME, BABY! YA KNOW. GRRR! ` MY NIGGAS ` ` SOME NIGGAS THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO TRY ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` SOME NIGGAS THAT'S REALLY DO AND DIE ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` WILL HAVE YOU COWARDS READY TO CRY ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` WILL FRY ` ` WILL ROB ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` KEEP NIGGAS ON THEY FUCKIN' JOB ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE WHEN SHIT GETTIN' HARD ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` STAY PULLIN' YOU OTHER NIGGAS' CARDS ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` IT'S GOD ` ` WE'LL SHINE ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` JUST KNEW IT WAS A MATTER OF TIME ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` LET ME KNOW TO KEEP FUCKIN' WITH THE RHYMES ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` AIN'T NO LONGER LIVIN' WITH CRIME ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` IS FINE ` ` IS GOOD ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` MY NIGGAS ` ` WILL PUT YOU DOWN RIGHT WHERE YOU STOOD... ` BRANSON: SHARKS, FIRST AND GOAL AT THE 8-YARD LINE. WE'LL SEE WHAT CROZIER'S OFFENCE CAN PUT TOGETHER AGAINST THIS USUALLY STINGY RHINO DEFENCE. WHAT THE HELL-- WILLIE: WHOO! WHAT THE HOLY-- CROZIER, WHAT'S HE DOING? I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK HE'S DOING. WATCH 55! SET! BLACK 33, HIKE! BRANSON: BEAMEN BACK TO PASS. THE RUSH IS ON. GOT GOOD PROTECTION. HE'S ROLLING OUT RIGHT, DOIN' A BOOTLEG. HE PULLS IT DOWN. THERE'S ROOM TO RUN. HE'S GOT SOME DAYLIGHT. HE'S GOING FOR IT! AND IT LOOKS LIKE THEY GOT HIM, KEV. YES! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?! HOLY MACKEREL! OH, MAN. THAT IS FOOTBALL! TUG: IF I'M TONY D'AMATO RIGHT NOW, I'M PRAYING TO THE FOOTBALL GODS. WHAT DID I EVER DO TO DESERVE THIS? A NEW BREED... OF ATHLETE... AND MAN. THE FUTURE. WELCOME...TO THE... 21ST... CENTURY. ` NOW WAIT A MINUTE ` ` WAIT... ` SHARKS, BABY! WHAT'S THE NAME OF MY TEAM? EVERYONE: SHARKS! (MUSIC PLAYING) (MAN GREETING TONY IN ITALIAN) HEY! THAT MINNESOTA GAME... WHY DIDN'T YOU KICK? I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA KICK. HEY, YOU SHOULD'VE KICKED. CAP, YOU THINK YOU'LL BE READY FOR THE PLAYOFFS? I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A QUICK HEALER. I'LL BE THERE. I THINK I GOTTA-- YOU SHOULD HAVE KICKED. I'M GONNA COME BACK HERE. I JUST SAW SOMEBODY. I ALMOST GOT AN AUTOGRAPH. CHRISTINA: IT GIVES ME GREAT PLEASURE TO PRESENT D.A.R.E. WITH THIS $250,000 CONTRIBUTION. THE CITY OF MIAMI THANKS YOU, CHRISTINA PAGNIACCI. YOU ARE A GREAT MIAMIAN. YOU HAVE DONE AS MUCH AS ANYONE TO ELIMINATE DRUGS AND CRIME FROM OUR CITY STREETS. AND YOUR SHARKS HAVE PROVIDED WONDERFUL ROLE MODELS FOR OUR INNER CITY YOUTH TO LOOK UP TO. AND I'M ALL FOR IT. NOW... LET'S GET DOWN AND PAR-TY! (MUSIC PLAYS) (PAPUCHO Y SU GRUPO WAO SINGING MARINERITO MARINERON) WHERE IS THAT BOLD AND BEAUTIFUL QUARTERBACK OF YOURS, CHRISTINA, HUH? CAP. HEY. SAY HELLO TO HIS HONOUR. OH, GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN, SIR. SHOW ME SOME LOVE. ABSOLUTELY. (LAUGHING) YOU KNOW MY WIFE CINDY, RIGHT? IT'S SO NICE TO SEE YOU. IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU. I MEANT THE OTHER QUARTERBACK. YOU KNOW, THE BLACK DUDE? WHO? WILLIE. HE MEANS WILLIE. OF COURSE. OF COURSE. (SINGING IN SPANISH) WOMAN: DEXAMETHASONE AND EXTRA-STRENGTH HYDROCODEINE. OOH! THAT MIX MAKES JIMMY CRAZY. HE CAN'T GET IT UP. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS. YEAH. OH, IS WILLIE MANAGING TO KEEP HIS FOOD DOWN TONIGHT? YEAH, HE'S FINE. I'M VANESSA--STRUTHERS. JACK GOT SUCH A LAUGH OFF THAT ONE. HEATHER: JIMMY HAD TO ORDER NEW SHOES. HI. I'M JAMIE LASSETER. HEATHER SANDERSON. HEATHER SANDERSON. HI. SO, ARE YOU AND WILLIE MARRIED? OH, NO, BUT WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR, LIKE, 6 OR 7 YEARS. DOESN'T COUNT UNTIL YOU'RE MARRIED, HONEY. OR UNTIL YOU GET YOUR NAME IN THE PAPER AS "AND WIFE." (EVERYONE LAUGHING) YO, J... DID I EVER TELL YOU WHAT THIS BITCH SAID ABOUT ME? EW! WHERE'S YOUR HANDKERCHIEF? THE BITCH SAYS... "YOUR SAUSAGE AIN'T RIGHT." MAN, THIS SHIT BUMMED ME OUT, MAN. I WENT TO A SHRINK. (GARGLES) NEXT TIME, USE A HANDKERCHIEF. ORVILLE! GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! WHAT IF BOTH MY BROTHERS HAVE FUCKING AIDS? WOMAN BEATER! LET'S GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE SHE GO PUBLIC. YOU SUCK! MOTHERFUCKER! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! BE PROUD, SON. YOU ARE THE FUTURE OF FOOTBALL NOW. NO, NO, YOU ARE A MODEL FOR YOUR PEOPLE NOW-- A BLACK MAN UNAFRAID. STAND TALL. GIVE ME SOME LOVE. HA HA! YOU--YOU PRETTY COOL, TOO, MAN. THANK YOU. IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU AGAIN. WELCOME. GOOD TO SEE YOU, TOO. ARE YOU MARRIED? I'M BETWEEN MARRIAGES. I'M BETWEEN MARRIAGES. BETWEEN MARRIAGES? WHAT DO YOU DO FOR DICK? LOOK, CAN I BE HONEST WITH YOU, CHRISTINA? THIS IS A WASTE OF MY TIME. I COME UP WITH THE EDGE WE NEED, THE STATS, THE PROBABILITIES, EACH WEEK. I'M NOT GONNA WASTE ANOTHER SEASON UNDER TONY. YOU WON'T, OK? I PROMISE. MAYOR: BUT YOUR TEAM AIN'T DOIN' WHAT THE DOLPHINS ARE DOIN'. A NEW STADIUM IS THE LAST THING ON THE CITY COUNCIL'S MIND. YOU KNOW, I'M NOT ASKING YOU TO VOTE, T.J. I'M ASKING YOU TO DELIVER. I WANT THE 250 MILLION YOU PROMISED ME. YOU KNOW I CAN GET THE REST WITH THE BONDS. SCHOOLS ARE HOLLERING FOR MONEY. ROADS NEED REBUILDING. IF YOU'RE NOT THERE FOR US, T.J., WE'D SERIOUSLY CONSIDER LEAVING THIS TOWN. YOUR LEASE HAS 2 MORE YEARS LEFT ON IT, SO DON'T START SETTING FIRES YOU CAN'T PUT OUT. THERE ARE LOOPHOLES, LIKE THE GODDAMN STADIUM IS FALLING APART. YOU KNOW YOU HAVEN'T CONTRIBUTED ONE FUCKING PENNY TO THE MAINTENANCE ON THAT RELIC. NOW, THAT'S THE PAGNIACCI I BELIEVE. I SEE YOUR TEETH. GET DOWN, GIRL. SEE, YOU ARE A RELATIVE BABE IN THIS TOWN. GO SLOW. FIRST YOU GET ALONG... THEN YOU GO ALONG. HMM? OH, COME ON, DARLIN'. WE ARE A PRO TEAM, T.J., AND WE ARE LOSING A TON OF FUCKING MONEY. (THAT'S THE WAY I LIKE IT PLAYS) "LIFE BEGINS WITH A KICK-OFF." ART USED TO SAY. MM-HMM. THAT'S ARTIE. HE WAS FOOTBALL, MARGARET. I KNOW. NOW ALL WE HAVE ARE THESE... KNOW-IT-ALL ESPN ANALYSTS. HI, TONY. ` DO DO DIDDY DEE DA ` HEY, I'VE JUST BEEN KNIGHTED, MAN. COME ON, MOM. LET'S GO. OH, NO. WHY DO WE HAVE TO LEAVE? IT'S NOT LATE. IT'S GETTING THERE. OH, I GOTTA GIVE THIS BACK TO YOU. ` AND TO REACH THE HIGHEST PEAK ` ` BUT IT DOESN'T THRILL ME HALF AS MUCH ` WE GOTTA DO THIS AGAIN. LET'S DO IT TOMORROW NIGHT. ` LA DEE DEE DA ` ` ALOO ` ` A DADDA DA DEE ` ` DEE DA LOOP ` AH HA, WHOO! REMEMBER WHEN MY DAD DESIGNED THAT RING? YEAH. GUESS I'M GONNA HAVE TO WEAR MINE ON A CHAIN AROUND MY NECK. YOU GOTTA WIN ONE FIRST. I WAS ONLY TRYING TO MAKE-- NO, JUST WIN ONE. MARGARET: GOOD NIGHT! GOOD NIGHT! SEE YOU LATER! YEAH, I SAW YOU LOOKIN' AT HEATHER SANDERSON'S ASS. WHY DIDN'T YOU INTRODUCE HER TO THE MAYOR, HUH? 'CAUSE YOU DAMN SURE DIDN'T INTRODUCE ME. AFTER ALL THESE YEARS I'VE BEEN WITH YOU! WHAT ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT? I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT THEM. I'M NOT THINKIN' ABOUT THE MAYOR. I'M NOT THINKIN' ABOUT THEM CRACKHEAD ASSHOLES. THE ONLY THING I AM THINKIN' ABOUT IS THE GAME! SO, WHAT ARE YOU SAYIN', WILLIE? I DON'T LOOK SO GOOD TO YOU ANY MORE? I AIN'T SAYIN' THAT. TO BE IN COLLEGE OR A COLLEGE GRADUATE, YOU'RE PLUMB DUMB. WELL, HEATHER SANDERSON SAID THIS, AND CINDY ROONEY SAID THIS, AND WILLIE THIS AND WILLIE THAT AND AAH! FUCK! YOU GONNA COME AT ME WHEN I'M DEALIN' WITH THIS SHIT? THEN GET THE FUCK OUT. WILLIE! GET OFF ME. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? WHAT? YOU'RE GONNA HIT ME NOW? I SEE YOU, WILLIE. YOU'RE TURNIN' INTO ONE OF THEM SHITS, JUST LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE ON THAT TEAM. I'M GONNA CALL YOUR MAMA. YOU'RE GONNA CALL MY MAMA? GIRL, LOOK, DON'T LET MY SUCCESS GO TO YOUR HEAD, BITCH! BITCH?! YEAH, WHY DON'T YOU GO FIND YOU ONE OF THEM COLLEGE, NERDY-TYPE MOTHERFUCKERS THAT YOU CAN HANG OUT WITH? WHAT YOU WORRIED ABOUT ME FOR, ANYWAY? WITH THAT HYPED, EDUCATED ASS. YES, YOU'RE RIGHT, WILLIE, I AM EDUCATED! AND YOUR DUMB, COUNTRY ASS CAN'T EVEN READ A FUCKIN' PLAYBOOK! YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO? YOU CAN TAKE YOUR FOOTBALL, SINCE IT'S THE ONLY BALL YOU GOT ANYWAY, AND STICK IT UP YOUR STUCK-UP ASS, 'CAUSE MY BEAUTIFUL ASS YOU WON'T BE SEEIN' ANY MORE. I'LL BE AT DARLENE'S HOUSE. COS YOU KNOW WHAT? SHE MIGHT FUCK BETTER THAN YOU, BITCH! GET YOUR DYKE ASS ON OUTTA HERE. I'M NOT A DYKE. FUCK YOU! HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU GOT A NASTY MOUTH ON YOU, TOO, GIRL. I'M GLAD I FOUND OUT. I DON'T WANT YOU AROUND MY KIDS WITH THAT GODDAMN CUSSIN' AND SHIT! I'D NEVER HAVE YOUR BUCK-TOOTHED ASS. FUCK YOU, BIG-ASS BITCH! (TYRES SQUEALING) ` YOU CAN'T CATCH ME, BOY ` ` DON'T UPSET ME, BOY... ` (TRICK DADDY'S 'BOY' CONTINUES PLAYING) MIND IF I SIT DOWN FOR A MINUTE? UH...YEAH. WHAT YOU LISTENIN' TO? RAP. ANYONE I KNOW? TRICK DADDY. YEAH. YOU KNOW HIM? SURE. YOU EVER LISTEN TO JAZZ? YOU KNOW, COLTRANE, MONK, MILES DAVIS, BILLIE HOLIDAY? NO, I DON'T GET INTO THE OLD STUFF MUCH. WELL, MAYBE I'LL PUT TOGETHER A TAPE FOR YA. MY FAVOURITES-- CDS. I USE...CDS. AH, YEAH. WELL, FORGET ABOUT IT, THEN. HOW ABOUT YOUR MOM? IS SHE EVER GONNA COME TO A GAME? CHURCH. SHE THINKS THAT SUNDAYS IS FOR CHURCH. YOU KNOW, UH... MAYBE YOU DON'T KNOW THIS ABOUT ME, BUT I LOST MY DAD... WHEN I WAS YOUNG, TOO. WORLD WAR II. SO, IF YOU EVER WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT KINDA STUFF, I'M AROUND. OK? OK. (TURNS RAP MUSIC BACK ON) 1 (CHEERING) DEUCE RIGHT, SPLIT 25 BARREL CLEAR ON 1. I'M COMIN' IN FAST ON YOUR LEFT, BOY. DON'T MAKE ME WAIT. ON 1, READY? YO, WHAT'D HE SAY? YO, I DON'T SPEAK FUCKIN' EBONICS, LES. I GOT THE OUTSIDE BACKING? YOU GOT THE NOSE! THEY THINK YOU ARE A BUNCH OF LOWBROW, NEANDERTHAL SHITHEADS! GREEN 80! THEY THINK THEY ARE GONNA GUT YOU AND LEAVE YOU LAYING ON THE HIGHWAY WITH YOUR INSIDES HANGIN' OUT. SO THAT THE GODDAMN BUZZARDS CAN EAT YOUR NO-PLAYIN' ASSES! COACH, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE A STROKE. I DON'T GET STROKES, MOTHERFUCKER. I GIVE 'EM! BRANSON: FUMBLE. OH, NO. (WHISTLE) THERE GOES ANOTHER ONE FROM J-MAN. OR WAS IT WILLIE BEAMEN? REFEREE: FIRST DOWN. AW, COME ON! DAMN IT, NOW. SNAKE EYES RIGHT, RIGHT? YOU KNOW WHAT THE FUCKIN' PLAY WAS. YOU DIDN'T ADJUST SHIT, MOTHERFUCKER, AND YOU DIDN'T CALL THE GODDAMN AUDIBLE. YOU DIDN'T AUDIBLE SHIT, MOTHERFUCKER. I THINK MCKENNA'S GOT A DISTENDED KNEE. TORN EVERYTHING. BLOODY NIGHTMARE. HE'S OUT! WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE'S OUT? HE'S OUT FOR HOW LONG? IF HE'S LUCKY, EASTER. YOU DIDN'T ADJUST SHIT! I KNOW YOU DIDN'T ORDER FOR THAT, MOTHERFUCKER! HEY, HEY, HEY, KNOCK IT OFF! KNOCK IT OFF! YOU REALISE THAT THAT LITTLE SCREW-UP JUST COST US MCKENNA FOR THE SEASON! NOW, SIT DOWN, ALL OF YA! SIT DOWN AND SHUT THE FUCK UP! BABY! (WHISTLE) THEY'RE LEAKING. YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE. FIX IT, GOD DAMN IT! DON'T STRING ME OUT, ALL THAT BULLSHIT. FIX IT! FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, MAN? ANNOUNCER: AW, GEE. HEY, WHERE'D YOU FIND THIS FAGGOT? I APOLOGISE. I HAD TO GET THAT OUT OF MY SYSTEM. JUST DON'T DO IT ON MY SHOES. WHAT, YOU ON YOUR PERIOD, YOU ANOREXIC MOTHERFUCKER? YES, I AM. RIGHT, HERE WE GO. RIGHT DEUCE DOG 90 SMOKE ON 3. JIMMY, YOU'RE ONE. ICE, YOU'RE TWO. CHAMPAGNE, YOU CAN CLEAR OUT. J, MAN, CHECK THE FLAG. ON 3. DON'T FORCE IT IF YOU DON'T GOT IT. I GOT IT. I'M A RIGHTEOUS MOTHERFUCKER. ON 3. READY? TEAM: HIKE! ` I THOUGHT YOU ALL MIGHT BEGIN YOUR TOUR HERE ` YO! PULL! PULL! TUG: WOW, LOOK AT THAT BLOCK. TUG: PERFECT THROW! TOUCHDOWN. ANNOUNCER: TOUCHDOWN PASS. BEAMEN TO SANDERSON. TOUCHDOWN, BEAMEN. TOUCHDOWN, SHARKS. GOIN' RIGHT! GOIN' RIGHT! (WHISTLE) CAN YOU GET SOMEONE TO BLOCK 58? TURN IT UP! PUNTING TEAM. JESUS. RIGHT DEUCE GUN F-SHOOT 60 SNAKE EYES ON 3. YO, YO, YOU'D RUN SNAKE EYES IN THE RED ZONE-- YO, J-MAN, YOU CAN EITHER GET ON MY PAGE OR SHUT THE FUCK UP. (WHISTLE) WILLIE: ON 3. READY? SHARKS: BREAK! (KIRK FRANKLIN SINGS REVOLUTION ) ` FOR GOD SURE WIPE AWAY ` ` EVERY TEAR FROM THE EYE... ` ` DO YOU WANT A REVOLUTION? ` ` DO YOU WANT A REVOLUTION? ` ` WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, OHH ` ` OHH, OHH, OHH, OHH ` ` DO YOU WANT A REVOLUTION? ` ` COME ON, DO YOU WANT A REVOLUTION? TUG: WOW. UNDER INCREDIBLE PRESSURE OFF HIS BACK FOOT. 60 YARDS. TOUCHDOWN! PLAYOFFS, HUH? PLAYOFFS, NEW YORK, NEW YORK AND HOME-FIELD ADVANTAGE. TUG: WOW. AS THE SHARKS GO TO THEIR BYE WEEK, THE STORY HERE HAS GOT TO BE WILLIE BEAMEN. HE'S RUNNIN', HE'S THROWIN', HE'S ROCKIN' AND ROLLIN' AND CHUCKIN' AND JIVIN'. HE'S FLAT OUT STEAMIN'. THIS MAGIC SUNDAY, HE'S STEAMIN' BEAMEN. (BOMB DROPPING) (BOOM) (ZAPP'S MORE BOUNCE TO THE OUNCE PLAYING) AAH! (METALLICA'S MOTORBREATH PLAYING) HELL, NO. NOT THIS NAZI ROCK SHIT AGAIN. METALLICA RULES! YOU CRAZY, BOY. HETFIELD IS GOD. YEAH! WE LIVE TO SERVE HIM. YOU SHOULD BOW DOWN TO THE MONSTERS OF ROCK. THAT'S RIGHT, BITCH. CAN YOU FEEL THE INTENSITY, BABY? WE DID SOMETHING EXCEPTIONAL TODAY. WE WERE UNDER PRESSURE, AND WE DID IT. COME WEDNESDAY, WE GOT ONE THING ON OUR MINDS. THAT'S RIGHT. ONE THING: VICTORY, BABY. WE WANNA FEEL THIS WAY AGAIN, DON'T WE? WE WANNA FEEL THIS WAY AGAIN, DON'T WE? SHARKS: YEAH! NEW YORK! SHARKS: NEW YORK! (HOOTIN' AND HOLLERIN') 4:00. QUEEN CHRISTINA'S HERE. HEY, GUYS. HEY, WHAT'S UP, BOSS? CLARK. HEY, WHAT'S UP, BOSS? GREAT GAME, HUH? YEAH, THANKS, GUYS. HEY, WHERE'S BEAMEN AT? UH, DOWN THERE. DOWN THERE? OK. HEY, HOW'S IT GOIN'? HEY, CAP. J.J., GREAT GAME. LOOKIN' REALLY GOOD OUT THERE. THANKS A LOT. PETE, DON'T STIFFEN UP ON ME. BEAMEN. WILLIE. HEH HEH HEH. HEY. CONGRATULATIONS. YOU WERE GREAT TODAY. REALLY EXCITING TO WATCH OUT THERE. WELL, YOU KNOW, I THRILL TO CHILL. YOU CAN'T DANCE. WHAT? MAYBE IF YOU GET OFF THE JUICE, YOU CAN GET A BIT LOOSE. OH, FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU. IT'S LIKE THAT? (IMITATING SCHWARZENEGGER) I'LL BE BACK. I'LL BE BACK. HOPE YOU DON'T THINK THIS IS RUDE. YOU KNOW, I DON'T B.S., MISS PAGNEECCI. UH...YOU DO IT TO ME. I WAS WONDERING IF WE MIGHT GO OUT... FOR A DRINK, SOMETHING, HANG... I'M FLATTERED, WILLIE. REALLY. YOU SHOULD BE. I AM, BUT I'VE NEVER DATED PLAYERS. IT GIVES THE WRONG IMPRESSION. I GUESS YOU'RE SAYING YOU'RE... INFLUENCED BY WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK. I THINK WE ALL ARE IN BUSINESS. AND IT'S, UM, PAGNIACCI. RIGHT, RIGHT. GUYS. YO, YO, YO, YO. EAT THIS, YOU MOTHERFUCKIN' PUSSIES. (GROWLS) (GROWLS) I'M SORRY, BABY, I'M SORRY. SO REEBOK'S GOT THIS WHOLE AD CAMPAIGN READY TO GO THE MOMENT I HIT 2,000 YARDS. BUT IT'S ABC, MAN. I DON'T GET THE BALL, I DON'T GET MY STATS, I DON'T GET MY MONEY, AND I LIKE GETTING MY MONEY, COACH. THIS TEAM ISN'T ABOUT YOUR DAMN STATS. THAT'S A WINNIN' ATTITUDE, J. HOW MUCH YOU PAYIN' THAT 300-POUND BLOCKER? LET HIM BLOCK... 'CAUSE HE SURE CAN'T RUN, NOT LIKE I CAN. HEY, HEY, J-MAN'S GOT A POINT. BEAMEN AIN'T DOIN' HIS HOMEWORK. HE'S NOT READIN' THE PLAYBOOK, HE AIN'T COMIN' IN TO SEE THE FILMS, HE DON'T EVEN KNOW THE NAMES OF THE DEFENCE HE'S FACING. HE--HE DON'T GIVE A GEE WHIZ ABOUT ANYBODY. HE JUST WANTS TO MAKE THE PLAYS HIMSELF. HE'S YOUNG, CAP. HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO READ LIKE YOU. "HE'S YOUNG"?! COME ON, CROZIER. HE JUST DOES WHAT HE LIKES. HE'S CHANGING THE PLAYS IN THE HUDDLE, THE PLAYS THAT YOU DESIGNED THAT I LOVE. HE COMES IN, HE'S DISSIN' THIS PLAY, HE'S DISSIN' THAT PLAY, I GOT A BETTER PLAY. HEY, GUYS, WE WON. YOU KNOW, WHAT'S THE POINT HERE? I'M TRYING TO FUCKIN' GET PAID! THAT'S THE POINT! NO, THE POINT IS, IF WE DON'T WIN, YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO DO YOUR CHIP AND DIP COMMERCIALS, OK? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW? YOU'RE AN OFFENSIVE COORDINATOR... CROSIER. JESUS CHRIST. KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT. (GROANS) GET THIS SHIT STRAIGHT, COACH. I'M WITH YOU, MAN. IT'S ALL RIGHT, J. ANYTHING ELSE? SO, GUESS WHAT? COACH SUDDENLY INVITED ME OVER FOR DINNER. OR ORDERED ME, MORE LIKE. THAT MEANS YOU MADE IT, BOY. COACH, HE THINKS YOU'RE THE REAL DEAL, INVITES YOU OVER TO HIS HOUSE. IT COMES ALONG, YOU TAKE IT. BETTER BRING SOME FLOWERS. COACH GETS REALLY PISSED OFF IF YOU DON'T. FLOWERS? YO, TRUST ME, MAN. WHEN? SATURDAY. OOH, THAT'S LIFE, MAN. GOT A GIG OVER MY HOUSE. GONNA BE A LOT OF TRIM. DON'T BRING NO SAND TO THE BEACH, BOY. COME ON. I'M A BORN AGAIN LADIES MAN. GONNA GET BORN AGAIN, BABY. THAT WAS NICE. THING ABOUT A TEAM, HOTSHOT, IS YOU CAN LEAD, BUT IS ANYBODY FOLLOWING? YOU GO OUT THERE ON YOUR OWN, YOU CAN DIE A VERY LONELY DEATH. YOU FEELIN' ME? (LAUGHS) SAY, CAP, HOW OLD ARE YOU AGAIN? (REPORTERS SHOUTING) HARV, WE GOT A PROBLEM. THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH SHARK. OH, BRILLIANT DEDUCTION. DID YOU GO TO MEDICAL SCHOOL FOR THAT? HE'S HAVING TROUBLE FOCUSING. EYE-HAND COORDINATION'S DETERIORATING-- HE'S FUCKED UP. THEY'RE ALL FUCKED UP. THE CRAZIER THEY ARE, THE MORE THE CROWD LIKES IT. HARV, THIS ISN'T PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING. HE NEEDS AN MRI AND AN MRA-- YOU'RE NOT HERE 6 MONTHS, OLLIE. YOU'RE GONNA ORDER A $20,000 WORK-UP FOR EVERY NUTCASE ON THIS TEAM? COME ON. YEAH. HE COULD HAVE A SUBDURAL HAEMATOMA, INTRACRANIAL BLEEDING. OR HE COULD JUST BE A CRAZY FUCKER, OK? LISTEN, THEY ALL WALK ON THAT FIELD EVERY SUNDAY. THEY GOT ONLY ONE THING AND ONE THING ALONE GOING FOR 'EM: THEIR CONFIDENCE. YOU START CHIPPING AWAY AT THAT WITH A BUNCH OF UNNECESSARY TESTING, AND WE CAN JUST KISS THE PLAYOFFS GOODBYE. ARE YOU SAYING THAT I CAN'T DO THE TESTS ON SHARK? JESUS CHRIST. I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT. I'LL GET YOU THE RESULTS. NO, NO, I-- I HAVE EARNED THEIR TRUST. YOU HAVEN'T. GOOD NIGHT. HEY, BABY. HI. WHAT'S THE MATTER? WHAT'S THE MATTER? WHO'S COURTNEY? WHO'S COURTNEY? YEAH. I DON'T KNOW WHO THE FUCK SHE IS. WHY ARE YOU STARTING YOUR SHIT RIGHT AWAY? HUNTER! WILLIE, HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE A NOBODY ONE DAY AND HAVE THE WHOLE WORLD KNOW YOU THE NEXT DAY? WELL, I WAS ALWAYS A STAR. Y'ALL JUST DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT IT YET. WELL, IT AIN'T THE WHOLE WORLD. 2 BILLION PEOPLE IN CHINA AIN'T NEVER HEARD THE NAME. SHARK'S IN THE WATER. THERE HE GOES. THE BUS BOY, STEAMIN' BEAMEN. WHAT YA THINK, BABY? AHH, IT'S ALL TO THE GOOD. THAT'S WHAT I THINK, BABY. YEAH. LET'S GET OUTTA HERE, 'CAUSE YOU KNOW, MAN, THIS STUDIO TIME AIN'T CHEAP IN THIS TOWN. MEN'S VOICES: GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! (LATIN AMERICAN SONG PLAYS) (CROWD LAUGHING, CHATTERING, AND SHOUTING) TAKE OVER, BABY. I'M GONNA BE DOIN' THIS EVERY DAY. WILLIE, RAPPING: ` GOTTA GET TO WORK ` ` THAT'S RIGHT ` ` YES, YES, YES, YES ` ` COME ON, COME ON, COME ON, HEY, COME ON ` ` MY NAME IS WILLIE ` ` WILLIE BEAMEN ` ` I KEEP THE LADIES ` ` CREAMIN' ` ` AND ALL MY FANS ` ` GOT 'EM SCREAMIN' ` ` THINK YOU CAN DEFEAT ME? ` ` YOU'RE DREAMIN' ` GET SET, MOTHERFUCKER. THEN WE CAN GET IN THE GYM. COME ON. MAN: WAHH! WAHHH! ` GET DOWN TO THE NITTY-GRITTY ` ` THEY GONNA RUN OUT ON THE FIELD AND SHOW THEIR TITTY ` ` UMM! UMM! ` MAN: GIVE GENEROUSLY TO CHILD FIND OF AMERICA. WILLIE: AND LET'S MAKE EVERY KID FEEL LIKE A SUPERSTAR. (KIDS ALL CHATTERING AT ONCE) YOU SHOULD'VE FOUGHT FOR THAT SUPERSTAR LINE. I KNOW. "GIVING. TEAM SPORT." THOSE ARE THE LINES. ` STEAM UP, BE BUFF ` MEANWHILE, HONEY, YOU USED TO DO THIS SPOT ALONE. HIT IT! FINISHED? (SHOUTING, INDISTINCT) (RAP CONTINUES, INDISTINCT) ` I'M WILLIE BEAMEN ` ` WHO'S THAT BRINGIN' THE PRAISE? ` OK, YEAH. COULD YOU TAKE CARE OF JULIAN FOR ME? THIS GUY, HE'S--HE'S A TOP PLASTIC SURGEON. I THINK I COULD GET HIM TO SEE YOU TONIGHT. ` I INTRODUCE YOU ` (CONTINUES INDISTINCT) OH! MOTHERFUCKER! ` SOMEONE'S ASSHOLE TO HIS LIPS ` ` YEAH ` (TOILETS FLUSHING) ` GUARANTEED FIRST DOWN ` ` MY NAME IS WILLIE ` ` WILLIE BEAMEN ` ` I KEEP THE LADIES ` ` COLD-CREAMIN' ` ` AND ALL MY FANS ` ` I GOT 'EM SCREAMIN' ` ` THINK YOU CAN DEFEAT ME? ` ` YOU'RE DREAMIN' ` INFLATE YOUR CHEST! GET MET-RX! ` HE GOTTA GO WORK ` YO, ROCKY. ENOUGH. YOU'RE GONNA HURT YOURSELF. KID'S BREATHING DOWN MY NECK. JACK, HE'S NOT EVEN CLOSE. YOU'RE THE MAN. LESS ON THE BALL, WILLIE. WHAT? YOU WANT A COOL, TIGHT SPIRAL. AND DON'T PAT THE BALL. THAT WAS TIGHT AS ASS CHEEKS, COACH. YOU KNOW I'M THE MAN. YOU'RE THE MAN. I REPEAT-- DON'T PAT THE BALL. THEY CAN SEE IT. WHAT'D HE SAY? HE SAID I'M AS TIGHT AS FISH PUSSY. CAP: SET! I NEED AN INTERPRETER. HUT! MONROE: CATCH THAT BALL! OK, CAP. SIT DOWN. I'M FINE. I'M FINE. YOU GOT THE BALLS. WE ALL KNOW THAT. COME ON, JUST...GET SOME REST. LET'S GO. MANDRAKE, VOICE-OVER: BOTTOM LINE, ROONEY IS LIKE SOME KIND OF MEDICAL MIRACLE. I MEAN, HE REALLY COULD BE READY FOR NEW YORK. CHRISTINA: HAVE YOU TOLD ANYONE? CAP: HEY, I'VE BEEN ON FOR 12 YEARS AND 2 RINGS. NOW, GIVE ME A BREAK. I'VE PLAYED HURT BEFORE. IT'S NO BIG DEAL. HE'S SO FREAKED ABOUT BEAMEN TAKIN' HIS JOB, HE'D PROBABLY PLAY WITH A FRACTURED NECK. COULD YOU SLOW HIM DOWN, HARVEY? I MEAN, JUST...TELL HIM HE'S NOT RESPONDING TO REHAB WELL ENOUGH. LET'S GIVE BEAMEN A SHOT. WE'RE GONNA GO WITH WILLIE AGAINST NEW YORK. I'M CAPTAIN. I NEED YOU TO REST UP UNTIL THE PLAYOFFS. DOESN'T MEAN ENOUGH AGAINST THE EMPERORS FOR YOU TO RISK EVERYTHING YOU GOT. CAP: HOME FIELD ADVANTAGE? THAT DON'T MEAN ANYTHING? WELL...EVERYONE KNOWS HERNIATED DISKS ARE IFFY. I COULD RECOMMEND... COME ON. THIS IS HOW IT STARTS, HUH? HMM? DON'T BULLSHIT ME, TONY. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. I KNOW HOW YOUR MIND WORKS. REST UP. LET THE KID TAKE A FEW GAMES. YOU KNOW, YOU WERE GREAT, BUT TIME MARCHES ON. THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M SAYING. THE HECK YOU'RE NOT. I'M NOT. I KNOW THE GAME OF FOOTBALL. WHAT ABOUT SHARK? AH, HE'S...WOOZY STILL. HE'S GOT BAD MIGRAINES, POST-CONCUSSIVE SYNDROME. CROSS YOUR ARMS. DON'T GET A HARD-ON. DON'T MOVE. CAN YOU CLEAR HIM? CHRISTINA, THE GUY'S HAD 3 CONCUSSIONS IN 5 MONTHS. THERE'S JUST NO WAY TO PREDICT WHAT ANOTHER HEAD HIT WOULD DO TO THIS GUY. LOOK, I DON'T THINK ANYTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN, BUT I'M NOT A COMPLETE PRICK, YOU KNOW? I DO HAVE SOME KIND OF CONSCIENCE, OK? I'M NOT TRYING TO SCREW HIM, HARVEY, BUT I'D LIKE TO HAVE HIM IN THE PLAYOFFS. LONG-TERM, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING? WHAT AM I THINKING? BOTTOM LINE? WE'LL CUT HIM IN THE OFF-SEASON. THE WORD'S OUT. EVERYONE'S SEEN HIM TAKE THE HITS. NOBODY'S GONNA SIGN A $2 MILLION CONCUSSION CASE. HE'LL BE HAPPY TO HAVE HIS JOB BACK AT 30% OF WHAT HE MAKES. THAT'S IF WE WANT HIM BACK. HE'S GOT 4 KIDS, CHRISTINA. YOU DO THE MATH, DOCTOR. WHAT YOU HELP SAVE US NOW... WE WON'T FORGET AT CONTRACT TIME. WHAT DO I TELL TONY? TELL HIM WHAT HE NEEDS TO KNOW. SHARK CAN PLAY. CAP CAN'T. ...IN THESE HIGH BEAUTIFUL HEELS, TOO. SO, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED? A PUMP. (LAUGHS) NO... YOU NEED TO BE... YOUNG AGAIN. (LAUGHING) YOU GOT ME! OH, NO! (LAUGHING) I LIKE GOING DOWNFIELD, JACK. THAT'S MY GAME. I OPEN IT WIDE. THAT'S WHAT THE FANS WANT. A LOT OF OLD-TIMERS DON'T DIG IT... WHAT IS THIS? NO! ROSE: COACH STONE AGE? IS THAT WHAT YOU JUST SAID TO ME? IT'S UP AND IT'S GOOD, BABY! THAT'S JUST A LITTLE NICKNAME THAT I GIVE HIM. I DON'T MEAN ANY DISRESPECT. TELL ME ABOUT YOUR PAST. WHERE DID YOU START? I STARTED IN HOUSTON, BUT THE COACH DOWN THERE, HE DIDN'T REALLY DIG THE IDEA OF A BLACK QUARTERBACK. I GUESS HE FELT OUR BRAINS WAS NO BIGGER THAN THE TIP END OF HIS (BLEEP). THEN I WENT TO SAN DIEGO. I GET A COACH WHO'S A GENIUS, MAKES ME A CORNERBACK BECAUSE HE FELT THAT I HAD QUICK FEET. NO, WAIT, LEAVE HIM ON. HE'S COOL. COOL? YEAH. THINKS HE'S JOE MONTANA ALREADY. THEY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT THE (BLEEP) I WAS. I MEAN, HE DOESN'T BUY INTO THE BULLSHIT, YOU KNOW? I LIKE HIS EYES. SEE, LIFE AIN'T FAIR. AND FAIR AIN'T WHAT I'M HERE FOR. HE'S SURE OF HIMSELF. IT MAKES HIM SEXY. (SIGHS) I'M GLAD I'M OLD. CHEQUE ALL RIGHT? NO, I'M NOT SURPRISED. ROOKIE QUARTERBACK HOTSHOT. THINKS HE'S HOT SHIT NOW, AND HE'S ALL-PRO ALL OF A SUDDEN? HONEY, DID YOU FEED THE DOGS YET? WOULD YOU PUT THE KIDS TO BED? WHY CAN'T WE AFFORD A MAID? WHY THE HELL DID I GET MARRIED? FUCK THAT! (GLASS SMASHES) SOUNDS LIKE A CONSPIRACY. ARE YOU SAYING BLACK PEOPLE ARE BEING DISSED IN THIS LEAGUE, WILLIE? I SEE WHAT YOU DOING. YOU DOING THAT MEDIA SPIN OR WHATEVER, BUT LET'S TALK ABOUT THE FACTS. 70% OF THE PEOPLE IN THIS LEAGUE IS AFRICAN-AMERICAN. BUT HOW MANY BLACK COACHES DO YOU HAVE? BUT HOW MANY BLACK COACHES DO YOU HAVE? VERY FEW. VERY FEW. HOW MANY BLACK OWNERS? NONE. ZERO. AT WHAT POINT DOES THE "UNCLE TOM" FEEL COME IN? NOT MY LANGUAGE. IT IS YOUR LANGUAGE, COS WE DIDN'T SPEAK THIS LANGUAGE WHEN WE GOT HERE BUT COACH STONE AGE? HA HA HA! YOUR SMACK IS SO FRESH. IT'S SO ON-TIME AND TRUTHFUL. GIMME A POUND, DAWG. SHARE THE LOVE. I'LL PASS ON THE LOVE, DAWG. COULDN'T GET IT STARTED. HI. HEY. HOPE YOU LIKE CREAM IN YOUR COFFEE. YES, I DO. (CLEARS THROAT) MANDY, I LIKE YOU. I'M WONDERING IF MAYBE WE COULD MAKE THIS... A MORE REGULAR THING. YEAH. I GOT A FEW CLIENTS LIKE THAT. WE COULD BOOK A REGULAR TIME. I'LL GIVE YOU MY SERVICE NUMBER. I SORT OF MEANT I'D LIKE TO... WITHOUT THE MONEY. TONY... I KNOW. - YOU DON'T WANT TO DO THIS. I REALLY LIKE YOU. - I LIKE YOU, TOO. TONY, YOU DON'T WANT TO DO THIS. CALL ME. THANKS. YOU GOT PRETTY HAIR. THANKS. OK. (DOORBELL RINGS) GOT YA FLOWERS. THESE FOR ME? YEAH. HA HA HA! AH, THANK YOU. CARNATIONS. YEAH. I'LL PUT 'EM IN WATER OR SOMETHING, HUH? COME ON IN. WANT A BEER? YEAH. SHARK, YOU MOTHERFUCKER. NICE SPOT. YEAH, ISN'T IT? OH, THE GLADIATORS OF THEIR TIME, HUH? OH, YEAH. THAT'S WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT. I DON'T REALLY COOK SO WELL, BUT YOU GOTTA TRY THIS JAMBALAYA. READY? YEAH, I'M ALWAYS READY, COACH. THIS IS MY RECIPE... SORTA. HOW DO YOU LIKE IT? IT'S...HOT. HA HA HA. WE GOTTA TALK ABOUT SOME BASICS. YOU GETTING READY TO YELL AT ME, RIGHT? NO. NO, COME ON. CAP GOING DOWN WAS REALLY TOUGH ON ME. I REALISE YOU'RE JUST LEARNIN' THE SYSTEM. PRESSURE MUST INCREDIBLE-- I CAN HANDLE IT. NO, I KNOW YOU CAN. IF THE PLAYBOOK IS TOO COMPLICATED, WE SIMPLIFY IT. PLAYBOOK'S TOO SLOW. WHEN I'M ON THE FIELD, I JUST GOTTA FEEL IT. I GOTTA LET IT OUT-- THAT WHY YOU'VE BEEN CHANGING THE PLAYS? NO. I'M JUST TRYING TO READ THE DEFENCE. I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT AUDIBLES. TALKING ABOUT IN THE HUDDLE. LOOK, WHEN YOU CHANGE PLAYS, YOU SHOW DISRESPECT TO A LOT OF PEOPLE-- I DON'T MEAN DISRESPECT TO ANYBODY. ...PEOPLE WHO HAVE WORKED OVER YEARS IN THIS CLUB, AROUND THIS LEAGUE, PEOPLE SACRIFICED MORE THAN YOU'LL EVER KNOW TO BE IN THIS-- I'M TRYING TO WIN, COACH! I AIN'T TRYING TO DISRESPECT NOBODY, BUT WINNIN' IS THE ONLY THING I RESPECT. OK, SON. I WANT YOU TO LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY, 'CAUSE ONE DAY YOU'RE GONNA REALISE THIS IS THE TRUEST THING YOU EVER HEARD. THIS GAME... THIS GAME HAS GOT TO BE ABOUT MORE THAN WINNING. YOU'RE PART OF SOMETHING HERE. LOMBARDI, TITTLE, SAMMY BAUGH, UNITAS-- HUNDREDS OF GREAT PLAYERS. THOSE MEN ON THE WALL. YOU'RE PART OF THAT NOW. AND ON THE WAY, I WANT YOU TO CHERISH IT, BECAUSE WHEN IT'S GONE, IT'S GONE FOREVER. WHEN I LOOK AT THEM PICTURES, THE TROPHIES AND STUFF, IT JUST MAKES ME SAD. IT'S LIKE A ROOM FULL OF GHOSTS. WHEN I'M DONE WITH THIS GAME OR THE GAME IS DONE WITH ME, I DON'T WANNA BE NO GHOST ON THE WALL. I WANNA BE MORE THAN THAT. LOOKS LIKE, UH, CAP IS GONNA MAKE IT BACK IN TIME FOR THE PLAYOFFS. WHAT? I'M GONNA START HIM. I KNEW THAT'S THE ONLY REASON YOU GOT ME HERE. I KNEW YOU WAS GONNA SELL ME OUT. CAP'S A LEADER. HE'S A TEAM PLAYER. YOU NEED A TEAM TO WIN-- THAT'S BULLSHIT! HE AIN'T HALF THE ATHLETE I AM. YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYE AND TELL ME THAT CAP IS A BETTER PLAYER. CAP'S A BETTER PLAYER. I GUESS SOMEBODY ELSE WAS OUT THERE WINNIN' THEM LAST 2 GAMES, HUH? I PUT THE POINTS ON THE BOARD. HE LOST 4 IN A ROW. I LEAD BY DOIN'! YOU KICKED ASS, BUT I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING. CAP ROONEY'S BEEN DOIN' IT FOR YEARS. AND HIS TIME IS OVER. AND YOURS IS, TOO, UNLESS YOU START TAKIN' SOME RISK AND START PLAYING THIS GAME THE WAY IT'S PLAYED TODAY. IT IS NOT ABOUT THE PICTURES AND TROPHIES ON THE WALL! HEY, I'VE LIVED THIS GAME FOR 3 DECADES, KID! I KNOW FOOTBALL! NOW, THOSE MEN ON THE WALL-- THEY WANTED TO WIN. JUST LIKE YOU DO. YOU CAN FEED THE PRESS AND THE FANS THAT WHOLE SACRIFICE AND GLORY OF THE GAME CRAP. YOU DO IT WELL. BUT I BEEN THERE. I'VE SEEN A LONG LINE OF COACHES JUST LIKE YOU ALL THE WAY FROM COLLEGE WITH THAT SAME OLD BULLSHIT HALF-TIME SPEECH. BULLSHIT? YES, IT'S BULLSHIT. YOU KNOW IT'S BULLSHIT, BECAUSE IT'S ABOUT THE MONEY. RAKIN' IN THE TV CONTRACTS, FAT-CAT BOOSTERS SITTIN' IN THE SKYBOXES, THE COACHES TRYIN' TO UP THEIR SALARIES. AND THE WHOLE TIME, WHAT YOU LOOKIN' FOR? YOU LOOKIN' FOR THE NEXT BLACK STUD TO TAKE IT TO THE TOP 10, GET YOU IN THE BOWL GAME. IT'S THE SAME WAY IN THE PROS. 'CEPT IN THE PROS, THE FIELD HANDS GET PAID. COME ON, DON'T PLAY THAT RACE CARD ON ME, KID. 25 YEARS I WORK WITH MEN OF YOUR COLOUR. MAYBE IT'S NOT RACISM. MAYBE IT'S PLACISM. BROTHER HAS TO KNOW HIS PLACE, RIGHT, BOSS? I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE-- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? YOU DON'T TRUST ANYBODY BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU IN COLLEGE? COME ON, WILLIE! YOU KNEW THE RULES! YOU WERE THE ONE THAT BROKE 'EM! BROKE 'EM? HOW DID I BREAK 'EM? BROKE 'EM? HOW DID I BREAK 'EM? HOW'D YOU BREAK 'EM? YOU BROKE 'EM. THAT'S HOW YOU BROKE 'EM. I LOST A MILLION DOLLAR SIGNING BONUS 'CAUSE I TOOK A $300 SUIT FROM A BOOSTER TO GO TO THIS KID'S WEDDING. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THE GUY. WHAT IS A BROTHER SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN HE IN COLLEGE? HE AIN'T GOT NO MONEY. HE WANNA GO OUT ON A DATE. HE WANNA BE GETTIN' SOME NICE CLOTHES. EVERYBODY HAD THEIR HANDS OUT, BUT IT WAS ME THEY SUSPENDED. I DROPPED 6 ROUNDS IN THE DRAFT BOOK BECAUSE OF THAT, THEN THE COACHES LABELLED ME, "WELL, HE'S A TROUBLEMAKER. HE ARROGANT ` DON'T WANNA PLAY NO BALL" NOW, YOU TALK ABOUT A SACRIFICE. I SACRIFICED ALMOST $10 MILLION 'CAUSE DUMB REDNECKS LIKE YOUR COACHIN' FRIEND IN SAN DIEGO MADE ME A CORNERBACK 'CAUSE I GOT QUICK FEET. HE'S THE ONE THAT SEPARATED MY SHOULDER, HAD ME OUT THERE TACKLING 250-POUND MOTHERFUCKERS. I DON'T DO THAT KINDA SHIT! I WAS A GREAT FOOTBALL PLAYER... BUT NOBODY GAVE ME A TIME OR A DAY OR A SEASON TO LET MY SHOULDER HEAL, THEN THEY TRADED ME OUT. THAT'S RIGHT. YOU GO AHEAD. BLAME EVERYBODY BUT YOURSELF, WILLIE. YOU SEE? 'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT A LEADER'S ABOUT. SACRIFICE-- THE TIME'S HE'S GOTTA SACRIFICE BECAUSE HE'S GOTTA LEAD... BY EXAMPLE. NOT BY FEAR. AND NOT BY SELF-PITY. WHO YOU THINK YOU'RE TALKING TO? HALF MY FOOTBALL CAREER IS OVER, AND YOU WANT ME TO GO BACK TO THE BENCH TO SACRIFICE FOR THE GREATER GLORY OF CAP ROONEY? WELL, FUCK YOU, COACH! I AIN'T BUYIN' YOUR BRAND! JUST 'CAUSE YOU'RE SOME SCARED OLD MAN. YOU FEEL LIKE IF I PLAYED MY WAY, I JUST MIGHT WIN. THEN WHAT THE FUCK WAS YOUR LIFE ABOUT ANYWAY? YOU'RE NOT SOME FLASH-IN-THE-PAN CORNER OR RECEIVER OR EVEN JULIAN WASHINGTON! YOU'RE A GODDAMN QUARTERBACK! YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? IT'S THE TOP SPOT, KID. IT'S THE GUY WHO TAKES THE FALL. IT'S THE GUY EVERYBODY'S LOOKIN' AT FIRST, THE LEADER OF A TEAM... WHO WILL SUPPORT YOU WHEN THEY UNDERSTAND YOU... WHO WILL BREAK THEIR RIBS AND THEIR NOSES AND THEIR NECKS FOR YOU BECAUSE THEY BELIEVE, BECAUSE YOU MAKE 'EM BELIEVE. THAT'S A QUARTERBACK. YEAH. I'M THE LEADER OF YOUR TEAM... TILL CAP'S BACK UP. THEN I'M BACK ON THE BENCH. SHIT, YOU AIN'T SAID 2 WORDS TO ME. TILL CHERUBINI WENT DOWN. THEN IT WAS (IMITATING TONY) "GO OUT THERE AND-- "AND PLAY LIKE YOU'RE IN THE HOOD "AND YOU'RE THROWIN' THE BALL AND YOUR MAMA'S RINGIN' THE DINNER BELL." ALL YOU DO IS TALK AT ME, MAN. SO I'M GONNA STAY WHO I AM-- STEAMIN' WILLIE BEAMEN. AND WITH THE TIME I GOT LEFT, I'M GONNA PLAY MY WAY, GET MY DOLLARS UP. SO WHEN YOU GO TO WAIVE ME, TRADE ME, INJURED-RESERVE ME OR WHATEVER THE FUCK Y'ALL DO, I'LL BE WORTH 10 TIMES WHAT I WAS WORTH BEFORE I GOT HERE. YOU'RE VERY, VERY YOUNG. AND YOU'RE VERY, VERY... STUPID. (HONKING) YOU TRYING TO KILL SOMEONE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET OFF THE LAWN. OH, IT'S MR. BEAMEN. HOW YOU DOING? (RAP MUSIC PLAYING) TO ME, IT'S ALL ABOUT WINNING. THAT'S WHAT THIS COUNTRY IS ABOUT--BEING NUMBER ONE. THIS WHOLE COUNTRY WAS BUILT ON KICKING IMMIGRANT ASS. AFRICAN ASS, CHINESE ASS, DON'T-MATTER`WHO ASS. WHO INVITED YOU? GET THE FUCK OUT! FUCK YOU! GET THE FUCK OUT, BITCH! EVERY KID CAN GROW UP TO BE PRESIDENT, RIGHT? WHO THE HELL WANT TO BE VICE PRESIDENT? IT AIN'T NO NUMBER 2S IN FOOTBALL. HOMEBOY! WELCOME TO THE FISH. MAN, YOU COME TO MY HOUSE. YOU PLAY ME RIGHT. HEY, BLOWJOBS UPSTAIRS. IF YOU WANT THE SKIN, FOLLOW THE BITCHES. DON'T MESS MY SHEETS. THE WIFE BACK ON TUESDAY. HOMEY, I WON'T SPILL A DROP. HEY, NO SEMEN, NO BLOOD. GOD-DAMN! CAN YOU TELL ME WHO LOST THE PANTHEON CUP LAST YEAR? OR WHO CAME IN SECOND AT THE 100-YARD DASH IN THE OLYMPICS. WHERE I'M FROM, YOU'RE EITHER NUMBER ONE OR YOU AIN'T (BLEEP). THAT'S A FACT. MY MAN, WILLIE B. COACH HIT YOU WITH THE VINCE LOMBARDI SPEECH? HE WAS IN MY FACE LIKE WE LOST THE GAME. I GOT OUT OF DALLAS IS CAUSE I WORKED HARDER THAN ANYBODY ELSE. EITHER YOU MAKE IT, GET THE BIG CAR, NICE HOME, OR YOU DON'T MAKE IT AND CATCH THE BUS, AND YOU'RE IN THE FUNERAL HOME, BECAUSE LOSIN' IS DYIN'. LOSIN' IS DYIN'. I'M DOWN WITH THAT. WE'D BE TOP DOG IF THE DEFENCE WOULD STEP UP. WHOA, WHOA, LAY OFF THE D. SHARK HEAR YOU SAY THAT, HE'LL KICK YOUR ASS. LIKE I GIVE A FUCK. I'M TRYING TO WIN SOME GAMES. I AIN'T KISSIN' NO OVERRATED LOSERS' ASS. WHAT DO YOU CARE? YOU PLAYIN' FOR YOURSELF. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? YOU GOTTA EARN THE RIGHT TO DIS SOMEBODY ON THIS TEAM. TEAM? PLEASE. YOU CALL THIS A TEAM? ALL I SEE IS SUPERFLY BROTHERS RUNNING AROUND, LIVING IN THE WHITE MAN'S WORLD, GETTING THEIR DICKS UP $1,000 WHORES. J, YOU WERE A GREAT FOOTBALL PLAYER. BUT YOU DONE TURN INTO A JOKE. YOU'RE PLAYIN', BUT YOU'RE DYIN' INSIDE. WHAT THE FUCK YOU MEAN? KISS MY ARMANI ASS. KNOW WHAT I DID FOR THIS TEAM? I TAKE YOUR FUCKIN' LIFE. FOOTBALL IS A CORPORATION. BLACK KIDS ARE RAISED TO BE STARS, INDIVIDUALS. THEY DO NOT LEARN TO WORK TOGETHER. SHARK, BEAMEN TALKING SHIT ABOUT YOU. WHAT?! TALKIN' WE'D BE ON TOP IF DEFENCE DID THEIR JOB. YOU FUCKIN' KIDDIN' ME! MOTHERFUCKER! GOTTA BREAK A PIECE OFF HIS GODDAMN ASS. J: MOTHERFUCKER TRYIN' TO PLAY US. (RAP PLAYING) YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT! (CHEERING) WHOA! WHOA! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, MOTHERFUCKER?! IN FOOTBALL, THERE'S THE OFFENCE AND THE DEFENCE. CAN'T HAVE ONE WITHOUT THE OTHER. RESPECT WILL BE PAID! CALL THIS FUCKER A CAB! GET HIM OUTTA MY HOUSE! ISN'T THERE AN AWESOME NEW YORK PASS RUSH COMIN' AT YOU THIS WEEKEND? IS THE RAW FEAR IN THE BELLY, TERROR-- FEAR, TERROR--NO, I DON'T FEEL NONE OF THAT. IT'S LIKE, UH, THEY AIN'T EVEN GONNA TOUCH ME. THEY'RE NOT GONNA FEEL ME, NOT EVEN GONNA SMELL ME. IF IT'S THE T-REX OR THE TERMINATOR CHASIN' ME, I GOT THIS INVISIBLE JUICE. ONCE I TURN IT ON, I'M GONE. (BLOWS WHISTLE) STAY DOWN, MOTHERFUCKER! BRANSON: BEAMEN IS SACKED AGAIN. HE GOES DOWN HARD AS THE LINEMAN... THEY WON'T PLAY FOR HIM, TONY. THEN LET HIM FUCKIN' LEARN, THEN! TUG: WELCOME BACK TO THE MONSOON BOWL, FOLKS. THE EMPERORS HAVE BEEN EATING SHARK PATTIES ALL NIGHT LONG. SMASH-MOUTH FOOTBALL. THIS IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT. BRANSON: HALFBACK UP THE MIDDLE. LAVAY STEPS UP TO FILL THE GAP. MISSES THE TACKLE. AND THE EMPERORS SLOSH THEIR WAY INTO THE END ZONE. IT'S A TOUCHDOWN. GOOD JOB, OFFENCE! WAY TO PLAY! JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT CAN GO WRONG HAS HERE TODAY. MURPHY'S LAW IN EFFECT FOR TONY D'AMATO... CAN I GET SOME FUCKIN' PROTECTION? IF YOU AIN'T GONNA BLOCK, THEN GET THE FUCK OUT THE WAY! LOUDMOUTH SHOWBOAT MOTHERFUCKER! WHERE'S YOUR STEAM NOW, WILLIE? PLAYER: FUCK HIM, MAN. YOU MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA MAKE IT TOUGH, HUH? I CAN TAKE THAT SHIT! COME CONTRACT TIME, THERE'S GONNA BE A WHOLE BUNCH OF MOTHERFUCKIN' CHANGES! FUCK THIS. JUST GIVE US THE PLAY. IT'S EITHER GONNA BE YOU OR ME. AND IT AIN'T GONNA BE ME. MADMAN: SPACE! SPACE! WILLIE: RED 14! HIKE! BRANSON: AND THERE GOES HOME FIELD ADVANTAGE FOR THE SHARKS. ALTHOUGH THEIR SEASON ENDS ON A LOW NOTE, THERE IS STILL LIFE AFTER DEATH. 2 WEEKS FROM NOW, LOOK FOR THE UNDERDOG SHARKS IN THE PLAYOFFS IN TOUGHTOWN, USA: DALLAS, TEXAS, FOOTBALL CAPITAL OF THE WORLD. WELL, THERE GOES THAT BLACK DYNASTY YOU PROMISED ME, DARLING. WHAT'S THE MATTER, BEAMEN? FORGOT YOUR INVISIBLE JUICE? SHUT UP! STOP THIS NOW! FUCKER! 30 YEARS IN FOOTBALL, I NEVER SEEN SOMETHIN' STINKS LIKE THIS! TODAY, OUT THERE... YOU EMBARRASSED YOURSELVES. TODAY... I'M ASHAMED TO BE YOUR COACH. ROSE: LUCKY FOR HIM, SOME OF THESE SHARKS STILL HAVE SOME TEETH LEFT IN THEIR HEAD. TELL YOU THE TRUTH, THEY REMIND ME OF MY EX... WHAT MORE I CAN DO. DOESN'T MAKE SENSE... MY NOT HAVING A HOME. A LIFE. GAME'S ALL THAT MATTERS TO ME. 'CAUSE IT'S PURE. 4 QUARTERS. YOU CROSS THE LINE. YOU SCORE. ROSE: I'M A HUGE FAN OF THIS GUY GETTING HIMSELF A LOBOTOMY OR... TONY: IT'S SANE. OR A DOG OR A CAT. LIFE ISN'T. LIFE IS FUCKED. IT'S A NEW WORLD, TONY. I MEAN, IN MY DAY WE USED TO JUST BE HAPPY TO GET THE GODDAMN JOB. I MEAN, I USED TO SHOVEL LIQUOR IN THE OFF-SEASON, SELL USED CARS, INSURANCE. SOME OF THE GUYS USED TO EVEN WRESTLE. BUT SHIT, NOW... PRIMA DOGS. MMM. BODIES THAT ARE YEAR-ROUND GREAT BUT CRACK JUST LIKE CHINA. IT'S TV. CHANGED EVERYTHING. CHANGED THE WAY WE THINK...FOREVER. I MEAN, THE FIRST TIME THEY STOPPED A GAME TO CUT AWAY TO SOME FUCKING COMMERCIAL, THAT WAS THE END. BECAUSE IT WAS OUR CONCENTRATION THAT MATTERED, NOT THEIRS, NOT SOME FRUITCAKE... SELLIN' CEREAL. ...THE EXACT SAME 11 PLAYS SINCE 1971. WELL, WHO WANTS TO BE THINKING ABOUT BLITZES AND CROSS BLOCKS WHEN YOU'RE HOLDIN' YOUR GRANDKIDS IN YOUR ARMS? YOU GONNA MISS YOUR FRIEND SCREAMIN' IN YOUR FACE... EMBARRASSIN' YOU IN FRONT OF YOUR PLAYERS? THAT'S WHY I WANNA COACH HIGH SCHOOL. GET BACK TO THE BASICS. KIDS DON'T KNOW NOTHIN'. THEY JUST WANNA PLAY. LIKE YOU SAID, TONY. IT'S PURE. (RAP MUSIC PLAYS) ` YEAH, YOU KNOW, UH, COME ON ` ` COME ON, YOU KNOW MY NAME ` ` MY NAME IS WILLIE ` ` WILLIE BEAMEN ` ` I KEEP THE LADIES ` ` CREAMIN' ` ` AND ALL MY FANS ` ` GOT 'EM SCREAMIN' ` ` THINK YOU CAN DEFEAT ME? ` ` YOU'RE DREAMIN' ` INTERVIEWER: SO TELL ME, WILLIE, HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE THE NUMBER ONE QUARTERBACK... TONY: SO WHAT ARE THE ODDS? WELL, THERE'S NO TELLING. IT'S AN ODONTOID FRACTURE. BASICALLY, LUTHER, YOU BROKE YOUR NECK, AND IT NEVER HEALED CORRECTLY. WELL...IT'S HARD TO PREDICT THIS KINDA THING, BUT WHAT I CAN SAY IS THAT THE WRONG KIND OF HIT COULD RESULT IN PARALYSIS, SEIZURES... EVEN SUDDEN DEATH. (LAUGHS) WHAT ELSE IS NEW? IN MY OPINION, HE IS NOT MEDICALLY FIT TO PLAY. RIGHT NOW I NEED ONE SACK AND 3 MORE TACKLES, AND I GET MY BONUS. THEN WE'LL TALK. OK, MOTHERFUCKER? COME ON, LUTHER. YOU EVER SEEN AN OLD PUNCH DRUNK BOXER... STUMBLING AROUND, DROOLING... WITH NO MEMORY OF WHAT HE'S DONE IN HIS LIFE? YOU WANT THAT LIFE, LUTHER? COACH. YOU NEED ME AGAINST TEXAS, DON'T YOU? DON'T YOU? OF COURSE I NEED YOU AGAINST TEXAS. BUT NOT--NOT-- NOT AT THIS PRICE. NO. FOR A MILLION DOLLARS, I WILL SHAKE LIKE A COCONUT ON A TREE IF I GOT TO. COACH, I GAVE YOU 13 YEARS. YOU CAN GIVE ME ONE. FOOTBALL'S MY LIFE, COACH. IT'S MY LIFE! IT'S ALL I KNOW HOW TO DO. PLEASE, MAN. COME ON, COACH, PLEASE. YOU HAVE TO SIGN A WAIVER, SHARK. (CHUCKLES) BRING IT ON, MAN. BRING IT ON. COACH, WE NEED TO HAVE A DISCUSSION ABOUT HARVEY. WHERE THE HELL'S D'AMATO? NEVER SAY THAT YOUR PAPA DIDN'T BELIEVE IN YOU. OH, DON'T BELIEVE A WORD YOUR MOTHER SAYS. YOU EVIL MOTHERFUCKER! COME OVER HERE. WHAT? WHAT, TONY? SHARK'S FILM. I KNOW WHAT YOU DID, ASSHOLE! YOU SWITCHED THE RESULTS SO POWERS WOULDN'T PICK UP ON IT, DIDN'T YA? PRINCESS, I'M GONNA CALL YOU RIGHT BACK, OK? GRANTED, IT COULD LOOK THAT WAY TO A LAY PERSON, TONY, BUT-- NO. I WANT YOU OUTTA HERE NOW! YOU'RE TAKING THE HIGH ROAD? YOU'RE TAKING THE HIGH ROAD? YOU DIDN'T CONSULT WITH HIM! HE COULD GET KILLED OUT THERE! I'M GONNA CONSULT WITH A PLAYER? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I KNEW HIS ANSWER! AND GETTING KILLED--MAYBE, MAYBE NOT. ONE CHANCE IN A THOUSAND! BUT, HEY--NOBODY BLITZES LIKE THE SHARK, RIGHT, TONY? I NEVER WANNA SEE YOU NEAR ONE OF MY PLAYERS AGAIN! COME ON, TONY, THEY COULDN'T TAKE A PISS IN THE MORNING WITHOUT THE PILL, SO-- OH, AND NOW YOU'RE GONNA PLAY INNOCENT? YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK YOUR INNOCENCE! THEN WHAT ABOUT BEYER? WHAT ABOUT NIELSTROM AND MANZICKI? LOGAN AND KRAUSE? ALL THOSE YEARS, YOU HAVE BEEN TURNING A BLIND EYE! I WILL NOT HAVE THIS DISCUSSION WITH YOU! DON'T WANT TO HEAR THE ANSWER? DON'T ASK THE QUESTION! FUCKING SNITCH. EVER THINK ABOUT SHARK PUTTIN' FOOD ON THE TABLE OR HIS KIDS GOIN' TO COLLEGE? YOU LIED TO HIM. YOU DIDN'T GIVE HIM A CHOICE. YOU GOTTA GIVE HIM A CHOICE. IT'S A DOCTOR'S ETHIC. SINCE WHEN? THE HIPPOCRATIC OATH. THE ONE THAT STARTS "DO NO HARM"? WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, DOCTOR, I DIDN'T HAVE TO ASK HIM BECAUSE I KNEW THE ANSWER. WHO AM I TO TELL THESE MEN THEY CANNOT LIVE THEIR DREAM? THEY WILL NOT LIVE WITH SHAME, LIKE YOU. THEY ARE GLADIATORS! WARRIORS! AND LONG AGO, THEY MADE THAT CHOICE. NOT YOU, NOT YOU, NOT ME. AND I AM NOT GONNA TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR STANDING BETWEEN THEM-- DIDN'T YOU EVER HAVE A DREAM, OLLIE? I'M LIVIN' IT, HARV. OH, FUCK IT. HEY, TONY, WE DID WIN THE PANTHEON, THOUGH, DIDN'T WE? SEE YOU AROUND THE OLD NURSING HOMES. COURTNEY, LET'S GO. NO. I'M GONNA STAY HERE, HARVEY. WHAT? PLEASE. PERFECT. FUCK. OK, STAY HERE AND GET... BUTT-FUCKED BY 12 NEANDERTHALS. BITCH. COACH D, A LITTLE MUTINY IN THE MEDICAL RANKS? - GET OUTTA MY WAY! PIECE OF SHIT! WELL, THAT'S JUST GREAT. THAT'S JUST FUCKING GREAT! DID YOU GET THAT? You might only drive short distances to work each day. You might not drive your car to work at all. You might park securely at work. Or these days, everybody travels to you. Maybe you only do school runs. Or you work from home, so drive mostly on the weekend. At Youi, we get that everyone's not the same, so we tailor your insurance premium to how you use or don't use your car. Call: Or go to youi.co.nz today. SET! HIKE! (WHISTLE) COME ON, BABY. NOBODY'S GONNA HIT YOUR PUSSY ASS! YEAH, I KNOW. I KNOW, MAN. I JUST GOT HAPPY FEET. I'M GETTIN' OLD. THAT WE HAVE RIGHT HERE. KID: WHAT'S UP, J-MAN? J: WHAT'S UP, LITTLE MAN? IS IT TRUE YOU MAKIN' 10 MILLION A YEAR? THAT'S RIGHT. IT MUST BE TRUE ABOUT YOU NOT BLOCKIN' NO MORE, EITHER. MY DAD SAYS YOU WON'T TAKE ANY PASSES UP THE MIDDLE 'CAUSE YOU MIGHT GET HURT. WHAT'S THAT? YOU LED, NIGGER. BUT DID ANYBODY FOLLOW? LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHIN'... FOR EVERY SUCKER WHO MAKES IT... FOR EVERY BARRY SANDERS, FOR EVERY JERRY RICE... THERE'S A HUNDRED NIGGERS YOU NEVER EVEN HEARD OF. SURE. THE GAME'S TAUGHT YOU HOW TO STRUT... HOW TO TALK SHIT, HOW TO HIT. BUT WHAT ELSE? SUDDENLY, THERE'S NO MORE MONEY... NO MORE WOMEN, NO MORE APPLAUSE. NO MORE DREAM. THIS IS WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY TO YOU, WILLIE. WHEN A MAN... LOOKS BACK ON HIS LIFE, HE SHOULD BE PROUD OF ALL OF IT... NOT JUST THE YEARS HE SPENT IN PADS AND CLEATS. NOT JUST MEMORIES OF... WHEN HE WAS GREAT. YOU GOTTA LEARN THAT, WILLIE, IN HERE. IF YOU DON'T, YOU AIN'T A MAN. YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER PUNK. CAP: HEY, UH, WHO WANTS MUSTARD ON THEIR HOT DOG? JOHNNY? NO, JUST KETCHUP. KETCHUP, MUSTARD, MUSTARD... TONY: SO, UH, DOC'S CLEARED YOU FOR SUNDAY. YEAH? THAT'S GREAT. HEY, UH, CINDY! LITTLE HELP? HEY, TONY. COME ON. YOU KNOW, PAPER'S GOT US AS 6-POINT DOGS. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? I CAN'T WAIT TO STRAP IT ON AND STICK IT TO DALLAS LIKE WE USED TO. SHOW 'EM WHAT THIS GAME'S ALL ABOUT RIGHT THERE IN THE PLAYOFFS. YOU OK? YEAH, SURE. DOC GOT IT WRONG ABOUT YOUR BACK? I DON'T KNOW, TONY. IT HURTS A WHOLE LOT MORE THAN I THOUGHT. I THINK I PUSHED IT TOO HARD. DON'T PLAY HURT, CAP. YOU KNOW, YOU JUST NEED THE NEEDLE. YEAH, I'M SURE THAT'S IT. MAYBE YOU OUGHT TO GO WITH WILLIE, YOU KNOW? ARE YOU SEEING YOUR PSYCHIATRIST OR SOMETHING? (LAUGHS) NO. NO. WELL, ARE YOU DEPRESSED? ROCK, COME ON! YOU WANTED TO PLAY. I FOUGHT FOR YOU. IF THERE WAS SOMETHING WRONG, YOU SHOULDA TOLD ME. I HAD 4 WEEKS! I COULDA GONE ANOTHER WAY! I'M SORRY. (SIGHS) I GOT BLANK SPOTS IN MY MEMORY. IT'S WEIRD. AND I...SHAKE. SOMETIMES I CAN'T EVEN HOLD A SPOON. AND I'M ALWAYS ON PAINKILLERS FOR MY ELBOW OR MY RIB OR MY NECK. NOW I GOT THIS RUPTURED DISK, AND I JUST-- (CLEARS THROAT) EVEN WITH ALL THAT, I WOULD... GO BACK IN A SECOND... BUT IF I GO IN THERE, TONY... I'M GONNA FOLD. AND I JUST... I CAN'T DO THAT. YOU KNOW, THESE THINGS YOU'RE SAYIN'... ALL IN YOUR HEAD, ROCK. THEY'RE NOT REAL. YOU UNDERSTAND? YOU KNOW YOU GOT IT IN YOU BECAUSE I KNOW YOU DO. IT'S MY BODY, TONY. AH... MY BODY. IT'S NOT THERE. I WOULDN'T LET YA GET HURT. I NEED YOU, ROCK. TO LEAD THIS TEAM. COME ON. (PATS LEG) ONE MORE TIME. YOU AND ME. YOU AND ME. TOGETHER. TRUST ME. IF YOU NEED ME, TONY, I'LL BE THERE. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. WHAT I'M SAYING IS... I'VE GOT MY RINGS, WE TOOK CARE OF OUR MONEY, AND, UH...THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT. AND...AHEM... WE'VE HAD A GOOD RUN. I JUST THINK THAT IT'S TIME FOR ME TO GET OUT AFTER THIS SEASON. AND DO WHAT? WELL, I TALKED TO A GUY AT ONE OF THE NETWORKS-- YOU ARE A FOOTBALL PLAYER. YEAH. YEAH... WILL YOU HEAR ME OUT, OK? YOU'RE A FOOTBALL PLAYER, JACK, AND YOU HAVE 2 OR 3 YEARS LEFT IN YOU. CINDY. YOU'RE MISSING... THE BIG PICTURE HERE. THERE IS NO BIG PICTURE HERE, JACK. YOU'RE THE GODDAMN QUARTERBACK FOR THE MIAMI SHARKS! ARE YOU LISTENING... YOU'RE A LEGEND! AND YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT QUITTING?! LOOK, ALL MY LIFE, EVERYBODY'S BEEN TELLING ME WHAT TO DO, EVER SINCE COLLEGE! THIS IS NOT YOUR DECISION! IT IS MY DECISION-- I WILL NOT LISTEN TO THIS BULLSHIT FROM YOU. I WILL NOT! YOU WANNA KNOW WHY? BECAUSE THEY WANT YOU. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'? THE SKY'S THE LIMIT, BABY. AND WE'LL GET 'EM TO SWALLOW THE BEER DISTRIBUTORSHIP, TOO. YOU KNOW, AND THE FUNNY THING ABOUT THIS WHOLE SITUATION, WILLIE WILL, IS NO ONE REALLY KNOWS HOW GOOD YOU REALLY ARE. AND I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING ELSE-- YOU GET IN THAT PLAYOFF GAME, YOU SCORE, FORGET ABOUT THIS TEAM, BECAUSE THEY'RE GONNA LOSE ANYWAY. I'M BORED. CAN YOU GIVE ME A SECOND? YOU GONNA GET $5 MILLION SERIOUS DOLLARS FROM SOMEBODY. AND I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING ELSE. CHRISTINA, SHE WANTS TO GIVE YOU $2 MILLION TO EXTEND YOU FOR THE YEAR, BUT WE'RE GONNA WAIT. THAT'S WHAT YOU HIRED ME FOR, TO WATCH YOUR BACK. AND THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO. FOLLOW ME? HOPE YOU'RE DOIN' THAT, WAYNE. JUST IN CASE I AIN'T MADE OUTTA STEEL, MAN. SAY WHAT? I'M JUST SAYING, WHAT IF MY ARM STARTS HURTING? WHERE YOU COMIN' FROM WITH THAT? BABY, AIN'T NOTHIN' GONNA FALL APART ON YOU. VANESSA! VANESSA! VANESSA? EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME. HEY, Y'ALL. HOW YA DOIN'? HEY, THAT'S WILLIE BEAMEN! (LOUD MUSIC PLAYS) HEY! HOW YOU DOING? LONG TIME. YEAH. CONGRATULATIONS. YEAH. YEAH, UH... THINGS ARE COOL. GETTING WHAT YOU WANTED? I BLEW IT, V. ALL RIGHT? EVERYTHING WAS JUST HAPPENING SO GODDAMN FAST, I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO THINK. I WAS THINKIN' MAYBE WE COULD GO OUT, YOU KNOW, WE COULD JUST, LIKE, GET TOGETHER. I DON'T THINK SO, WILLIE. I'M SORRY. OH, OK, OK, OK, OK, I UNDERSTAND. OR DO I? WILLIE, YOU'RE JUST TOO VOLATILE FOR ME. I'M A SIMPLE GIRL. I LIKE SIMPLE THINGS. TRUTH BE TOLD, I DIDN'T EVEN LIKE FOOTBALL. I LIKED YOU. I'M SORRY. WAIT, I UNDERSTAND-- WILLIE, NO! V. PSST! WILLIE, GET OUTTA HERE! V, I JUST NEED TO TALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND. OH, MY GOODNESS! BARBARA BUSH! WHERE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE? I'M SORRY. HUH? YOU'RE LOOKIN' GOOD, TOO! SEE, THERE WE GO. THERE'S THAT SMILE I'VE BEEN LOOKIN' FOR. LISTEN TO ME. I JUST NEED TO KNOW THAT I CAN CALL YOU. WILLIE, NO. TELL ME RIGHT HERE THAT I CAN CALL YOU OR I'M NEVER GONNA TALK TO YOU AGAIN. YEAH, RIGHT. YOU ARE SO FULL OF SHIT. NO, I'M NOT. I'M VERY SERIOUS. DON'T TEST ME! OK, WILLIE, YOU CAN CALL ME, AS LONG AS YOU GET OUTTA HERE. NOW, GO! GET OUTTA HERE! I'M GETTING OUTTA HERE. YOU TOO SHY? NO, I'M NOT SHY! I GOT A DATE OUT THERE. OH, YOU TALKING ABOUT THE MORTICIAN OUT THERE? YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS, 'CAUSE HE'S TALL. YEAH. BUT HE CAN'T BALL. I'LL HOLLER. (GIGGLES) AH! CHRISTINA: CONGRATULATIONS. WAS I THE LAST TO KNOW? I HAD TO FIND OUT-- CINDY ROONEY TOLD ME. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, STARTING CAP? YOU GONNA JUST THROW HIM OUT IN THE PLAYOFFS AGAINST THE BEST PASS-RUSH IN THE LEAGUE? IF WE LOSE THIS GAME BECAUSE-- AND I'M GONNA DO YOU ONE BETTER. IN THE OFF-SEASON, I'M GONNA TRADE WILLIE. THAT IS NOT YOUR OPTION. THIS KID OF YOURS MAY SELL A LOT OF T-SHIRTS, BUT HE IS TEARIN' THIS TEAM APART! WELL, THEN YOU HOLD IT TOGETHER! I CAN'T! NOT WITH HIM. WHERE ARE YOU GOING? YOU WILL START WILLIE ON SUNDAY AND YOU WILL MAKE THE ADJUSTMENT TO MODERN TIME OR YOU'RE OUT! YOU DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO. NOBODY TELLS ME WHAT-- YOUR FATHER NEVER TOLD ME WHAT TO DO! YOU'RE NOT GONNA START TELLIN' ME! I WOULD CUT MY FATHER'S ASS IF WE WERE LOSING LIKE THIS. I'M REALLY GETTING SICK AND TIRED OF YOU. YOUR FATHER WAS NO GENIUS. HE ONLY ACTED LIKE HE WAS ONE. AND HE TOOK CREDIT FOR A LOT OF THINGS HE NEVER DID. HE AT LEAST RESPECTED ME, AND HE RESPECTED... WOULD YOU STOP USING MY FATHER AS A SCAPEGOAT? ...AND THE OWNER OWNING. I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE WHAT HE WOULD THINK OF YOU RIGHT NOW, BUT MY HUNCH IS, HE'D BE ASHAMED. HE'D BE ASHAMED! COME ON! WHY THE HELL DO YOU THINK MY FATHER PUT ME IN CHARGE, YOU BULL-HEADED MORON? HE COULD'VE MADE YOU GENERAL MANAGER, BUT HE DIDN'T, DID HE, TONY? YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE HE KNEW YOU DIDN'T HAVE THE GUTS TO DO IT AFTER HE WAS GONE. IT'S TRUE, TONY. HE JUST... HE COULDN'T TRUST YOU. YOU GOT OLD. (DOOR CLOSES) (WOMAN SINGING ARIA) HELLO, CHRISTINA. I'LL BE IN MY FATHER'S OFFICE. TONY: CHRISTINA IS GOING TO DESTROY THIS TEAM. MARGARET: WHAT IS IT YOU FEAR? THAT'S SO MUCH FEAR INSIDE OF YOU, TONY. I'M LOSING THE TEAM, MAGGIE. I'M LOSING CONTROL. EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE IS ABOUT CONTROL. I LEAD MEN. I CONTROL. DID ART THINK I WAS PAST IT? I DON'T KNOW. DO YOU CARE? OH, TONY. YOU NEVER UNDERSTOOD ARTIE, DID YOU? HE WANTED A SON... MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD. AND WHEN YOU REALLY THINK ABOUT IT, WHAT CHRISTINA IS... IT'S JUST SUCH A TRAGEDY. YOU KNOW, SHE WILL SELL THE TEAM. AND EVERYTHING THAT HER FATHER STOOD FOR IS GONNA DIE. AND WHAT WILL YOU DO, TONY, AFTER FOOTBALL? WITH NOBODY TO CONTROL? STOP IT. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? HEY, I BLAME YOU FOR A LOT OF THINGS. YOU WERE, LIKE ARTIE, A MONSTER. YOU'VE GOTTEN OLDER, BETTER, YEAH... BUT FOR A LONG TIME, OH, I HATED YOU. THAT GAME TOOK MY HUSBAND... MY DAUGHTER... MY YOUTH. LEFT ME WITH WHAT? ALL THOSE SUNDAY AFTERNOONS... AT THE STADIUM... AND TIME JUST... JUST KEPT SLIPPING AWAY, DIDN'T IT? (NINA SIMONE SINGS DON'T EXPLAIN) ` HUSH NOW ` SANDERSON ON TV: HOW'S YOUR HEAD, JACK? ROSE ON TV: THAT'S NICE OF YOU TO ASK. I'M STILL HURTING, QUITE FRANKLY. LIKE YOU GUYS, HECK, I PLAY HURT. TAKE A LOOK AT YOUR MONITOR. IT WAS MORE THAN JUST AGGRESSION. OUTTA MY WAY! (BLEEP) THAT'S JUST GREAT! ` I'M GLAD THAT YOU'RE BACK ` ` DON'T EXPLAIN ` ` QUIET, BABY ` ANNOUNCER: THERE GOES D'AMATO! HIS 14TH CONSECUTIVE GAME WITH A TOUCHDOWN! MAN: WE REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR HUSBAND LIEUTENANT LOUIS J. D'AMATO WAS KILLED IN THE EUROPEAN THEATRE OF OPERATIONS. AND TO YOUR SON ANTHONY D'AMATO, OUR DEEPEST REGRETS. ` SKIP BACK THE LIPSTICK ` ` DON'T EXPLAIN ` ` YOU KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU ` (INDIAN DRUMMING) (THUNDER) ANNOUNCER: CONTROVERSY SWIRLS AROUND THE 6-POINT SHARK UNDERDOGS. WILLIE "STEAMIN'" BEAMEN, THE SENSATIONAL THIRD-STRING, MIRACLE-MILE QUARTERBACK WHO'S HELD THE SINKING SHARKS TOGETHER THESE LAST 4 WEEKS, IS NOT STARTING, IS SAID TO BE FEUDING WITH HIS BELEAGUERED COACH TONY D'AMATO, WHO IS BEING INVESTIGATED FOR ALLEGEDLY HITTING JACK ROSE, A REPORTER, EARLIER THIS WEEK AT PRACTICE. TUG: I'D SAY THAT'S A BIT OF AN EXAGGERATION. A MILD SHOVE. I'M THE BEST WIDE RECEIVER THAT'S EVER LIVED. I CAN CATCH ANYTHING. I'M THE BEST RECEIVER THAT'S EVER LIVED. THAT'S RIGHT. ANNOUNCER: MEANWHILE, TUG, IMMORTAL BUT VULNERABLE CAP ROONEY, ONLY 6 WEEKS OFF A MICRODISKECTOMY ON HIS LOWER BACK WILL BE STARTING AGAINST THE TOUGHEST PASS RUSH IN THE LEAGUE. TUG: TOUGHEST? THE TOUGHEST. GET READY FOR THE SPARKS TO FLY. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. (CROWD CHEERING) WELL, CLEARLY THE TENSION OF THE SEASON GOT TO ME, AND I OVERREACTED TO AN INNOCENT QUESTION FROM A JOURNALIST WE ALL KNOW TO BE OF THE HIGHEST CALIBRE. I ONLY HOPE THAT ONE DAY I'LL TRULY BE ABLE TO SHOW JACK ROSE JUST HOW MUCH I TREASURE HIS INVALUABLE CONTRIBUTION TO THE SPORT OF FOOTBALL. THANK YOU. (REPORTERS SHOUT QUESTIONS) WHERE'S YOUR WHEELCHAIR? HELLO, COMMISSIONER. TONY. GOD, I HATE TEXAS. OH, SHIT. POWERS: HOW ARE THE HEADACHES? I WAS FINE TILL YOU STARTED DOING THAT SHIT. YOUR BALANCE? TALKIN' ABOUT CHEQUE BALANCE? LOOKIN' P-H-A-T, BABY. PHAT. ALL RIGHT. GO ON. GET OUTTA HERE. YOU'RE DONE. HOW ABOUT ANOTHER SHOT, DOC? YOU DON'T NEED IT. DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE... MEDICALLY. DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT MEDICAL, DOC. GIVE ME SOME OF THAT CORTISONE SHIT. PLEASE? (CROWD CHEERING) TUG: THE SURVIVING TEAM WILL MOVE ON NEXT WEEK TO MINNESOTA COLD COUNTRY FOR THE AFFA CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP. IN THE MEANTIME, WE'RE BACK TO ANOTHER DANG COMMERCIAL. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, REALLY. 3 MINUTES TILL THE BIGGEST BATTLE OF OUR PROFESSIONAL LIVES. ALL COMES DOWN TO TODAY. NOW EITHER WE HEAL AS A TEAM, OR WE'RE GONNA CRUMBLE, INCH BY INCH, PLAY BY PLAY, TILL WE'RE FINISHED. WE'RE IN HELL RIGHT NOW, GENTLEMEN. BELIEVE ME. AND WE CAN STAY HERE, GET THE SHIT KICKED OUT OF US, OR WE CAN FIGHT OUR WAY BACK INTO THE LIGHT. WE CAN CLIMB OUTTA HELL ONE INCH AT A TIME. NOW, I CAN'T DO IT FOR YOU. I'M TOO OLD. I LOOK AROUND, I SEE THESE YOUNG FACES, AND I THINK, I MEAN, I MADE EVERY WRONG CHOICE A MIDDLE-AGED MAN CAN MAKE. (PLAYERS CHUCKLE) I, UH, I PISSED AWAY ALL MY MONEY. BELIEVE IT OR NOT. I CHASED OFF ANYONE WHO'S EVER LOVED ME. AND LATELY, I CAN'T EVEN STAND THE FACE I SEE IN THE MIRROR. YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU GET OLD IN LIFE, THINGS GET TAKEN FROM YOU. I MEAN THAT'S--THAT'S PART OF LIFE. BUT YOU ONLY LEARN THAT WHEN YOU START LOSING STUFF. YOU FIND OUT LIFE'S THIS GAME OF INCHES. SO IS FOOTBALL. BECAUSE IN EITHER GAME, LIFE OR FOOTBALL, THE MARGIN FOR ERROR IS SO SMALL. I MEAN, ONE HALF A STEP TOO LATE OR TOO EARLY, AND YOU DON'T QUITE MAKE IT. ONE HALF SECOND TOO SLOW OR TOO FAST, YOU DON'T QUITE CATCH IT. THE INCHES WE NEED ARE EVERYWHERE AROUND US. PLAYER: HELL, YEAH. THEY'RE IN EVERY BREAK OF THE GAME, EVERY MINUTE, EVERY SECOND. (APPLAUSE AND AFFIRMATIONS) ON THIS TEAM, WE FIGHT FOR THAT INCH. ON THIS TEAM, WE TEAR OURSELVES AND EVERYONE ELSE AROUND US TO PIECES FOR THAT INCH. WE CLAW WITH OUR FINGERNAILS FOR THAT INCH. BECAUSE WE KNOW WHEN WE ADD UP ALL THOSE INCHES, THAT'S GONNA MAKE THE FUCKIN' DIFFERENCE BETWEEN WINNIN' AND LOSIN'! BETWEEN LIVIN' AND DYIN'! I'LL TELL YOU THIS, IN ANY FIGHT, IT'S THE GUY WHO'S WILLIN' TO DIE WHO'S GONNA WIN THAT INCH. AND I KNOW IF I'M GONNA HAVE ANY LIFE ANY MORE, IT'S BECAUSE I'M STILL WILLIN' TO FIGHT AND DIE FOR THAT INCH. BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT LIVIN' IS! THE 6 INCHES IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE! NOW, I CAN'T MAKE YOU DO IT. YOU GOTTA LOOK AT THE GUY NEXT TO YOU. LOOK INTO HIS EYES! NOW I THINK YOU'RE GONNA SEE A GUY WHO WILL GO THAT INCH WITH YOU. YOU'RE GONNA SEE A GUY WHO WILL SACRIFICE HIMSELF FOR THIS TEAM BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO IT, YOU'RE GONNA DO THE SAME FOR HIM! THAT'S A TEAM, GENTLEMEN. AND EITHER WE HEAL NOW AS A TEAM, OR WE WILL DIE AS INDIVIDUALS. THAT'S FOOTBALL, GUYS. THAT'S ALL IT IS. NOW, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? (CHEERING AND SHOUTING) You might only drive short distances to work each day. You might not drive your car to work at all. You might park securely at work. Or these days, everybody travels to you. Maybe you only do school runs. Or you work from home, so drive mostly on the weekend. At Youi, we get that everyone's not the same, so we tailor your insurance premium to how you use or don't use your car. Call: Or go to youi.co.nz today. 1 P.A.: DO YOU FEEL ALL RIGHT?! TUG: AND HERE WE GO, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. ANNOUNCER: HE'S BACK ABOUT THE GOAL LINE. OH, NO! LOOKING GOOD! HE'S IN THE OPEN FIELD! HE'S GONNA GO ALL THE WAY! TO THE 30! ALL THE WAY! TOUCHDOWN! WAY TO GO! ALL RIGHT, NO BIG DEAL. WE STILL BLOCK, WE STILL TACKLE. DIDN'T SAY WE WERE GONNA WIN BY A SHUTOUT. NOTHING CHANGES, ALL RIGHT? STAY WITH THE GAME PLAN. SET FOR THE FIRST SERIES? PIECE OF CAKE. BRING IT HOME, ROCK. (CROWD BOOING) ANNOUNCER: HOW 'BOUT A BIG TEXAS-SIZED WELCOME FOR THE MIAMI SHARKS AND QUARTERBACK JACK ROONEY? COME ON, BABY! HEY, HEY! MY BABY! GUYS, I MISSED YOUR UGLY MUGS. YEAH! YEAH! JUST LIKE OLD TIMES, BABY. HOW'S THAT DISK OF YOURS, STILL SPINNIN'? LIKE YOUR FAVOURITE CD, BABY. ALL RIGHT, NOW LISTEN UP. IT'S GONNA BE TWINS RIGHT ACE... ` THEY KEEP TRYIN' TO TELL ME ` BLUE 88! HUT! ` I-I-I'M GONNA SPREAD THE NEWS ` ` FEEL THIS GOOD GETTIN' USED ` ` OH, YOU JUST KEEP ON USING ME ` A 12-POINT GAME RIGHT NOW FOR DALLAS. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? IT'S JUST ONE TOUCHDOWN. IN YOUR HOMETOWN. LONG WAY TO GO. LOTTA TIME TO PLAY. THERE HE GOES. SACK NUMBER 12 ON THE YEAR. THAT'S A PERSONAL HIGH FOR LUTHER LAVAY. TUG: AND I GET DOG OUT OF YOU. WE HAVE A GOOD BALL GAME HERE REGARDLESS OF WHAT YOU THINK. MAN, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. IT STINKS. WE'RE THE BETTER TEAM. THE BETTER TEAM SHOULD WIN IF WE DON'T MAKE ANY MISTAKES. ` BABY, BABY, BABY, BABY ` ` WHEN YOU LOVE ME, I CAN'T GET ENOUGH ` 5! 88! HUT! ` AND I'M GONNA SPREAD THE NEWS ` ` THIS FEELIN' OF GETTIN' USED ` ` OH, YOU JUST KEEP ON USIN' ME ` ` UNTIL YOU USE ME UP ` TUG: INCHES, INGO. INCHES. CHRISTINA: IF YOU LET ME ON THE FINANCE COMMITTEE, I KNOW THAT I CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE WITH THE NETWORKS. I KNOW NEW YORK. I CAN BE INCREDIBLY EFFECTIVE. YOUR MOTHER LOOKS GREAT, BY THE WAY. SHE LOVES DALLAS AND NEIMAN-MARCUS. SHE'S A GOOD WOMAN. AND, UH, YOUR GOLF? OH, I'M ABOUT AN 11... FROM THE WHITES. NOT BAD. THINK YOU'RE READY FOR ME? THINK YOU'RE READY FOR ME? DON'T THINK I'M IN YOUR CLASS, CHRISTINA. FIRST DOWN, DALLAS! IT'S A GOOD GAME. GOOD TEAM. THANK YOU. I DON'T WANNA KEEP BOTHERING YOU ABOUT THIS. UM... CHRISTINA, THE OWNERS WOULD LIKE YOU TO COME UP TO NEW YORK FOR A MEETING. OH? ABOUT WHAT? WELL, THERE'S A CONCERN THAT'S BEEN VOICED ABOUT SOME MOVES THAT WERE MADE ON YOUR BEHALF FOR ANOTHER LOS ANGELES FRANCHISE. RULES HAVE BEEN BROKEN. WE'VE HEARD-- WHO? WHO SAID THIS? WHO'S BEEN-- WOULD WEDNESDAY THIS WEEK BE TOO SOON? NO. THAT'D BE FINE. GOOD. THE BEST OF LUCK TO YOU TODAY, THEN. (SIGHS) I HONESTLY BELIEVE THAT WOMAN WOULD EAT HER YOUNG. WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED? HUT! (PANTING) ANNOUNCER: THAT IS THE MEANING, IN ONE SENTENCE, OF CAPTAIN JACK ROONEY. HE WILL NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER. GIVE ME THE BALL. IT'S MINE! GET OUTTA HERE! GOOD JOB, CAP. WHOO! GOOD JOB! YEAH! GOOD JOB, BABY! WHOO! ANNOUNCER: SCORE AT HALF-TIME, KNIGHTS 21, SHARKS 17. I'M GOING DOWN. CHRISTINA, IS THAT A GOOD IDEA? CAN YOU PLAY? I'M A LITTLE BANGED UP, BUT I'M ALL RIGHT. CAN YOU PLAY? YEAH. YEAH, YOU BET. LOOK AT ME, ROCK. YOU WERE A WARRIOR OUT THERE TODAY. I WILL NEVER FORGET THIS. GO DO YOUR JOB, COACH. WILLIE. THIS ISN'T ABOUT YOU AND ME ANY MORE. YOU GOTTA LEAD THIS TEAM, WILLIE. WHEN THEY LOOK IN YOUR EYES, THEY GOTTA BELIEVE. I KNOW. (DOOR OPENS) WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING? CAP... IS FINISHED. (DOOR SLAMS) TONY: NEVER! NEVER TALK THAT WAY IN FRONT OF MY PLAYERS! GET OUTTA HERE! I DON'T GIVE A SHIT IF WILLIE IS OUT THERE CHANGING THE PLAYS! YOU LET YOUR EGO GET IN THE WAY OF THIS TEAM, AND YOU ARE GONNA-- GET OUTTA HERE! GET OUTTA HERE! UH, MISS PAGNIACCI, UH... I'M SORRY, BUT COACH D ALREADY TOLD ME I WAS GOING IN. CONTROL THE LINE OF SCRIMMAGE, YOU'RE GONNA CONTROL THIS GAME. YUP. POSSESSION OF THE BALL. THAT'S ALL I WANT. MOVE THOSE CHAINS. YUP. READ THE SAFETY'S DROP. IF HE'S FLATFOOTED OR HE'S BACKPEDALLED, THEN WE GO DOWNTOWN. SURPRISE HIM, WILLIE. MAKE IT SUDDEN. YUP. IF YOU SEE THEIR ARMS SHAKING OR THEIR ASSES UP IN THE AIR, THAT MEANS THEY'RE COMING. CONTROL THE LINE OF SCRIMMAGE, YOU'RE GONNA CONTROL THIS GAME. YOU SAID THAT ALREADY, COACH. ONE MORE THING... RIGHT OUT OF THE GATE, LET IT FLY. GO 999! SOCK THE SHIT OUT OF 'EM! TUG: INTERCEPTION! WHAT A WAY TO START THE SECOND HALF! ANNOUNCER: ...DALLAS 48 YARD LINE. THAT'S A TOUGH BREAK FOR THIS KID. HIS FIRST TIME IN PLAYOFF COMPETITION. HE'S GOTTA BE FEELING THE PRESSURE. BRANCO'S JUST ACHING TO NAIL YA. RIGHT? WATCH HIS KNUCKLES. IF THEY GO WHITE... DO A FADE TO SANDMAN. YOU WANT ME TO CHECK OFF? YOU WANT ME TO CHECK OFF? YEAH. WAIT, WHERE'S THE COACH I USED TO KNOW AND LOVE? WAIT, WHERE'S THE COACH I USED TO KNOW AND LOVE? IF BRANCO BITES! BLUE 22! (RAP MUSIC PLAYING) HUT! FIRST DOWN. OH, MY EYE! OW! MY EYE! AAH! I'M GONNA BE SICK. IT LOOKS LIKE, UH... HE HAD DAMAGE TO HIS EYE. ON THE 4! TWIST IT! HERE WE GO. STRONG LEFT, ZIG 90-GUN, ON 3. LOOK, I'M SERIOUS. IT WAS COACH D'S CALL. (LAUGHTER) BY THE WAY, I'M SORRY ABOUT GETTING A BIG HEAD BACK THERE. WASN'T ME. IT WAS THE DEVIL. RED 666. (ALL CHUCKLE) LET'S GET THESE BITCHES BEFORE THEY KNOW WHAT HIT 'EM. ON 3, READY? WATCH THE ROBBER ON YOUR RIGHT. HE'LL BE COMIN' AT YA. SET! HUT! HIKE! ANNOUNCER: ...GOING TOWARDS THE GOAL. HERE HE GOES! HE'S AT THE SIDELINES. THERE HE GOES. IT'S A TOUCHDOWN! STADIUM ANNOUNCER: TOUCHDOWN, MIAMI. I'M GOOD! YOU GOT IT! TOUCHDOWN! YOU HIT HIM FOR ANOTHER SCORE IN THE NEXT SERIES QUICKLY, HE'S GONNA FOLD. I KNOW IT. WILLIE: ALL RIGHT. 440, HIKE! STADIUM ANNOUNCER: TOUCHDOWN MIAMI! (MIMICS MACHINE GUN) THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, BABY! GOOD JOB, BABY! WOMAN: DEPENDING ON HOW THE ELECTION GOES, IT MAY GET EVEN BETTER. WE GOT 6 PRODUCING WELLS OVER THERE. (SPEAKING JAPANESE) DID YOU SAY YOUR HOME BASE IS HERE IN DALLAS? (LOUD CHATTER CONTINUES) IF YOU DON'T HAVE AT LEAST 30,000 IN ATTENDANCE, HEY, YOU CAN MOVE. FUCK! ANNOUNCER: I THINK THEY'RE GONNA BE SHORT. YEP, FOURTH AND ONE, TUG. COACH, IT'S FOURTH AND ONE. WE NEED A TIME OUT! LOOKS LIKE DALLAS IS GOING FOR IT. HE IS GOING FOR THE VICTORY NOW, NOT A TIE. HERE WE GO NOW. ONE TIME. THIS IS THE GAME, TUG. IF MIAMI CAN HOLD 'EM HERE, WILLIE BEAMEN WILL HAVE ONE LAST CHANCE. TUG: THIS IS WHERE THE FAMOUS RUBBER MEETS THE FAMOUS ROAD. SETTLE DOWN! SETTLE DOWN! BE PROUD! GUYS, Y'ALL ARE GONNA MAKE THIS PLAY! ONE YARD STANDS BETWEEN US AND MINNESOTA! THESE GUYS HAVE NO RESPECT FOR US. NONE WHATSOEVER. EVERYTHING WE HAVE FOUGHT FOR IS ON THE LINE RIGHT HERE. RIGHT NOW! BE PROUD! ALL: BREAK! THIS IS MY POWER SONG THAT IS TAKING ME TO THE EDGE. THIS IS MY HORSE AND MY TALKING TREE. MAN DANCING UNDERNEATH YOU. THEY HAVE FIRST? THEY HAVE FIRST? (OPERA SINGING) SHARKS' BALL! FIRST DOWN! STADIUM ANNOUNCER: FIRST DOWN MIAMI. TUG: HOW'D WE MISS SOMETHING LIKE THAT? HOW CAN YOU MISS A FOURTH AND ONE? TUG: LOOKS LIKE A MAN'S DOWN THERE AT THE LINE OF SCRIMMAGE. LUTHER "SHARK" LAVAY. ANNOUNCER: YOU KNOW, UP UNTIL NOW, HE'S BEEN THE HEART AND SOUL OF THIS DEFENCE, TUG. LET'S HOPE HE'S OK. POWERS: STABILISE HIS HEAD. SHARK! SHARK! CAN YOU HEAR ME? CHECK HIS HANDS. WE GOT A PULSE. HE'S NOT BREATHING. I DON'T KNOW, COACH. TONY: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? IS HE BREATHING? TALK TO ME. POWERS: GET THE AMBULANCE OUT HERE! TALK TO ME, SHARK. COME ON, SHARK. POWERS: COME ON, LET'S GET THAT BOARD OVER HERE! TONY: TALK TO ME, MAN. SHARK! THIS IS HOW IT STARTS. IS HE GONNA-- COME ON, BABY. COACH. OH! WHOA! WHAT HAPPENED? DID I STOP HIM? YOU STOPPED HIM COLD, GOD DAMN IT! LOOK AT THAT! MONROE: MAJOR BONUS, BABY. ONE MILLION BUCKS! TONY: LOOK AT THOSE BEAUTIFUL FINGERS! MEDIC: 1, 2, 3...ROLL! SECOND MEDIC: 1, 2, 3. SHARK: DON'T YOU GUYS DROP ME! I'M WORTH A MILLION DOLLARS. 1 ANNOUNCER: WELL, TUG, 55 SECONDS. DO YOU THINK THEY CAN PULL IT OFF? TUG: LOOK AT THAT. OH, BOY, IS DALLAS IN TROUBLE NOW! WILLIE BEAMEN'S RITUAL. LET'S PUT SANDERSON TO WORK, HERE, OK? WILLIE: 55 SECONDS. DO OR DIE. SOMEBODY THROW! BREAK! KID, BEAUTIFUL THING TO WATCH YOU THROW. BEAUTIFUL TO HEAR YOU SAY THAT, NOT-SO-OLD MAN. WILLIE: RAZOR! CHECK IT! BEST WIDE RECEIVER THAT'S EVER LIVED. DO IT! DO IT! COME ON! BE THERE! ANNOUNCER: FLAG! ON THE PLAY! IT'S COMING BACK, TUG! I GOT HOLDING, 69. NO TOUCHDOWN. PENALTY OFFENCE. YOU'RE OUT! TOUCHED AN OFFICIAL! YAY! NO! NOT ANY MORE! GET OFF! ANNOUNCER: THAT ANNULS THE PLAY. MM. WHOA, THANK YOU. HI. HI. THAT JUST MIGHT BE THE BACK-BREAKER RIGHT THERE. DAMN IT! ALL RIGHT, WE GOT 'EM RIGHT WHERE WE WANT 'EM. YOU'RE SUCH A PUNK. WATCH YOUR MOUTH. I'LL TAKE IT IN. I LIKE YOU BETTER WHEN YOU WAS PUKING. WHO ARE WE? SHARKS! READY? BREAK! I FEEL LIKE THINGS ARE CHANGING, YOU KNOW? STAMPEDE. STAMPEDE, OFFENCE. SET! HUT! THINGS ARE OUT OF CONTROL. MAYBE I'M JUST OUT OF CONTROL. I'M SORRY FOR THE WAY THAT I'VE BEEN BEHAVING. IT'S ALL RIGHT. YEAH. OK, KEEP YOUR WITS. KEEP YOUR WITS ABOUT YOU. ROLL IT! ROLL IT! (WHISTLE) YES, YES, YES! (SNARLING) TIME-OUT. TUG: MIAMI CALLS TIME-OUT WITH 9 SECONDS REMAINING-- REFEREE: TIME-OUT--MIAMI. THAT'S THE LAST ONE. SOMETHING'S GOTTA BE WRONG. THEY HAD IT COLD. ALL RIGHT. SMART MOVE. YOU KNOW, THERE'S SOMETHING I'VE BEEN--I'VE BEEN DYING TO ASK YOU. REMEMBER THAT TIME YOU CAME TO MY PLACE, I MADE DINNER FOR YOU? YEAH, YEAH. DID YOU NOT LIKE THE JAMBALAYA? IT WAS THE WORST SHIT I EVER TASTED IN MY LIFE. WHY YOU THINK I'VE BEEN THROWING UP EVERY WEEK? YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT THAT. NO, YOU KNOW THAT. NOW GET THE HELL OUT THERE AND WIN THIS GAME. COMANCHE. TONY, WE GOT 9 SECONDS. IF HE'S STOPPED INBOUNDS, THE GAME'S OVER. THERE'S NO TIME-OUTS LEFT. THIS IS WHAT COACHING'S ALL ABOUT, NICK. HEY, NICK, YOU UP FOR IT? (LAUGHS) OK, SPREAD WEST HUSTLE. WEST HUSTLE, 60 COMANCHE. 60 COMANCHE. MAN HAS BALLS OF IRON. TONY'S THE MAN, BABY. WE IN THIS TOGETHER? DYNAMIC DUO, BABY. COME ON! ALL: READY? BREAK! ANNOUNCER: 9 SECONDS LEFT TO PLAY. WILLIE: SET! WATCH THE SANDBAG. RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT-- HUT! MOM, MOM, MOM! (PANTING) DON'T LET HIM GET OUT OF BOUNDS. OUT, OUT! MAN: YES! HE'S OUT OF BOUNDS ON THE 3. UNSELFISH, UNSELFISH! WAY TO GO, JULIAN. (GROANS) GET OFF ME, MAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO LOOK! HEY! HEY! YOU HEAR THAT? THAT'S 4 SECONDS. OHH. (WHISTLE) ANNOUNCER: TIME-OUT'S CALLED BY THE KNIGHTS. DALLAS 35, MIAMI 31. NOW, REMEMBER-- SEE IT BEFORE YOU DO IT. ALL RIGHT? JULIAN GAVE YOU THE SHOT. THEN MAKE THEM BELIEVE, WILLIE. ALL RIGHT. THIS TIME, NOW! ONE ON ONE, MAN ON MAN. WE DO IT TOGETHER, ALL RIGHT? (GRUNTS AND CHEERS) I KNOW YOU ALL DON'T WANT TO GO HOME, RIGHT? ALL RIGHT. IT AIN'T NO TOMORROW. READY? BREAK! TUG: 3 YARDS TO GO. 4 SECONDS. ONE PLAY. WE'VE BEEN IN TOO MANY OF THESE. YEAH. THIS ONE'S GONNA GET IT, COACH. 4 SECONDS. 4 SECONDS IS A LIFETIME! WE'RE A LIFETIME AWAY HERE! SET! RIFLE 22! (CHEERING) HUT! HIKE! (THUNDER) TUG: NO! I THINK HE LOST IT, INGO. I THINK HE LOST IT. WATCH OUT, WATCH OUT! TOUCHDOWN! OH, YEAH! ANNOUNCER: TOUCHDOWN MIAMI! (LAUGHING) TOUCHDOWN! TOUCHDOWN! (CHEERING) YES, YES, YES, YES! (LAUGHING) (CHEERING) NICE NIGHT. CAN'T GET OVER CAP. I LEARNED MORE WATCHING HIM IN THE FIRST HALF THAN I DID IN 5 SEASONS. NEXT WEEK I'M GONNA WIN IT JUST FOR HIM. (SIGH) WELL, GLAD TO SEE SUCCESS HASN'T GONE TO YOUR HEAD TOO MUCH, KID. OH, WHO, ME? STEAMIN' BEAMEN? NAH. THIS IS YOUR MOMENT, WILLIE. SAVOUR IT. BUT NEVER FORGET-- ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY, YOU'RE EITHER GONNA WIN OR YOU'RE GONNA LOSE. "BUT CAN YOU WIN OR LOSE LIKE A MAN?" I GOT IT, COACH. YEAH. NEXT YEAR, I'M OUT OF HERE. I FIGURED. YEAH. I'M NOT THE RIGHT GUY FOR THIS TEAM ANY MORE. I WOULDN'T SAY ALL THAT. YOU KNOW, THERE WAS THIS GREAT QUARTERBACK IN THE SEVENTIES I KNEW. I MEAN, THIS GUY WAS ONE TOUGH SON OF A BITCH. HE FOUGHT FOR EVERY INCH HE EVER GOT. I MEAN, HE DIDN'T HAVE YOUR NATURAL SKILLS, THIS GUY, BUT HE COULD MAKE IT HAPPEN. HE COULD WIN, BUT THE GAME PASSED HIM BY. ANYWAY, I RAN INTO THIS GUY... ABOUT A FEW WEEKS AGO IN L.A. AND WE HAD A FEW BEERS, AND WE STARTED TALKING. YOU KNOW WHAT HE TOLD ME? NAH. HE SAID WHEN HE LOOKED BACK, HE DIDN'T REALLY MISS THE PANTHEON CUPS, OR THE GIRLS, OR EVEN THE GLORY. YOU KNOW WHAT HE MISSED? YOU KNOW WHAT HE MISSED? WHAT? WHAT HE MISSED WERE THOSE OTHER GUYS LOOKING BACK AT HIM IN THE HUDDLE. THOSE 11 GUYS, EVERY ONE OF THEM, SEEING THINGS THE SAME WAY. ALL OF THEM LOOKING DOWNFIELD, TOGETHER. THAT'S WHAT HE MISSED. I'M GONNA MISS YOU, AMIGO. NAH. YEAH. YEAH, YEAH. 'CAUSE, YOU KNOW, MY ARM HAS BEEN KILLING ME. I MET WITH THIS SPECIALIST AND HE SAID... IT'S OK, THEN. HEY, WE'RE ALL SCARED. YOU THINK IT'S EASY BEIN' A COACH. I'LL TRADE YOU THAT MICROPHONE... IS IT TRUE YOU'RE NOT COMIN' BACK TO THE SHARKS NEXT YEAR? I'M A TRIPLE-DECKER STRESS SANDWICH RIGHT NOW. WHY IS THAT, COACH? THE 32-13 LOSS TO SAN FRANCISCO? YOU'RE NOT EVEN CLOSE, JOHNNY. TRY FISHIN' SOMEPLACE ELSE. CHRISTINA: AND I WANT TO LIVE UP TO WHAT IT IS MY FATHER LEFT ME... A LEGACY... A FEELING OF A BOND WITH THIS TOWN... A FEELING THAT THIS IS OUR HOUSE, THE PAGNIACCI HOUSE. (CHEERING) AND WE HAVE GREAT CONFIDENCE THAT IN THE FINAL HOUR, OUR MAYOR WILL BE THERE FOR US. (APPLAUSE) (CHEERING) (WHISTLING) AND, TONY... KNOW THIS. WHEREVER YOU GO... YOU WILL ALWAYS BE... LOVED AND GREATLY RESPECTED. THANKS FOR HELPING ME UNDERSTAND AGAIN WHAT I'D FORGOTTEN. TONY D! (LAUGHS) (ENTHUSIASTIC CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) (LOUD WHISTLING) (WHISTLING) HE'S BEEN HERE 30 YEARS! EVEN THE DOGS ARE SAD, HE SAID. WELL... IT'S BEEN WAY TOO LONG... NOT TO WIN A BIG ONE. SAN FRANCISCO SURE TOOK CARE OF THAT FOR US, DIDN'T THEY? (LAUGHTER) UM... IN FOOTBALL, AS IN LIFE, THINGS CHANGE. SO...I GUESS IT'S TIME FOR ME TO GET THE HELL OUTTA THE WAY, TO BRING IN THE NEW. I LIKE NICK CROZIER. I THINK HE'S GONNA DO A GREAT JOB. NICK. (APPLAUSE AND CHEERING) BUT MOST OF ALL, I WANT TO THANK THE PEOPLE OF MIAMI... FOR THEIR SUPPORT THROUGH THE LAST 20-SOME ODD YEARS. GEE, IT JUST FLEW BY. IT'S REALLY MEANT A LOT TO ME. (CHUCKLES) MAN: YEAH. TONY: YEAH. IT MEANT EVERYTHING TO ME. I'VE HAD A GREAT, GREAT RIDE, BELIEVE ME. AND, UH... AND I'M GONNA MISS YOU. (APPLAUSE) HE'S AN ARROGANT SON OF A BITCH, BUT I'M GONNA MISS HIM. BUT, UH... IN THINKIN' ABOUT CHANGE... I DON'T KNOW, I FELT, UH... MAYBE IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO MAKE A CHANGE, TOO. AND IT WAS WILLIE BEAMEN TAUGHT ME HOW TO GIVE IT ANOTHER SHOT. SO, UH... STARTIN' TODAY... I'M GONNA TAKE OVER AS HEAD COACH FOR THAT NEW EXPANSION TEAM IN ALBUQUERQUE, NEW MEXICO-- THE AZTECS. WHY? "WHY," DO YOU SAY? 'CAUSE THEY'RE GIVIN' ME FULL MANAGEMENT CONTROL. BUT HOPING NOT TO MAKE A COMPLETE FOOL OF MYSELF OUT THERE, I JUST SIGNED WILLIE BEAMEN AS MY STARTING QUARTERBACK AND FRANCHISE PLAYER FOR THE AZTECS. SO, UH... SO, MS. P... I'M LOOKIN' FORWARD TO SEEIN' YOU NEXT SEASON ACROSS THOSE SIDELINES. MAN: HOW CAN HE DO THAT? (CHATTER) SO LONG... AU REVOIR... SEE YOU WHEN THE CLOUDS COME HOME. (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) ESPECIALLY YOU, BABY. SMOKIN' CIGARS ON ME NOW, ARE YA? GOTCHA! MAN: THOUGHT WE HAD HIM TIED UP. ` SACRIFICE ` ` DON'T GIVE UP THE FIGHT ` ` EVERYTHING'LL BE ALL RIGHT ` ` ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` ` 'PENDS ON YOU ` ` IF YOU WIN OR LOSE ` ` YOU KNOW YOU GOTTA PAY SOME DUES ` ` ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` (THUNDER) ` SACRIFICE ` ` DON'T GIVE UP THE FIGHT ` ` EVERYTHING'LL BE ALL RIGHT ` ` ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` ` DEPENDS ON YOU ` ` IF YA WIN OR LOSE ` ` YOU KNOW YOU GOTTA PAY SOME DUES ` ` ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` WILLIE: ALL RIGHT, LITTLE MAN. WHAT'S UP, MAN? WHAT'S YOUR NAME? ` SACRIFICE ` WILLIE: HEY, WHAT UP, NOW? WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S UP? ` EVERYTHING'LL BE ALL RIGHT ` WILLIE: HEY, HOW Y'ALL FEELIN'? ` DEPENDS ON YOU ` WILLIE: ALL RIGHT, NOW. Y'ALL BE LOOKIN' OUT FOR THE GAME, NOW. ALL RIGHT. ` YOU KNOW YOU GOTTA PAY SOME DUES ` ` ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` ` DO WHAT I GOT TO DO ` ` EVEN IF I BREAK THE RULES ` ` OH, OH ` ` SHIT, WHO YOU TRYIN' TO FOOL? ` ` LONELY, LONELY ` ` OH, YEAH ` ` WELL, WELL ` ` AND THEN I'LL RISE TO THE TOP ` ` BUT IT DON'T MATTER ` ` OH, YEAH ` ` ...DISASTER ` ` OH, OH, OH ` ` SACRIFICE ` TUG: AND WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY FOR FOOTBALL IT IS HERE IN SOUTHERN FLORIDA. ` EVERYTHING'LL BE ALL RIGHT ` ` ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` ` DEPENDS ON YOU ` ` IF YOU WIN OR LOSE ` ` YOU KNOW YOU GOTTA PAY SOME DUES ` ` ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` ` WHEN YOU WIN ` ` WELL, YA THIRST AGAIN ` ` WISH THAT DAY WOULD NEVER END ` ` ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` (CROWD CHEERING) ` TO MAKE IT THROUGH ` ` DO WHAT YOU GOT TO DO ` ` NO MATTER IF YOU WIN OR LOSE ` ` ON ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` (CHEERING) ` WHEN YOU WIN ` ` YOU THIRST AGAIN ` ` WISH THIS DAY WOULD NEVER END ` ` ANY GIVEN SUNDAY ` MAN: ARE YOU WITH ME? (MAN SPEAKING IN INDIAN DIALECT) OVER THE WHOLE EARTH, THEY ARE COMING. THE BUFFALO ARE COMING. THE BUFFALO ARE COMING. THE WHOLE WORLD IS COMING. THE NATION IS COMING. THE NATION IS COMING. (MAN SPEAKING IN INDIAN DIALECT) ` WE SHALL LIVE AGAIN ` ` LA LA ` ` WE SHALL LIVE AGAIN ` ` LA LA ` ` WE SHALL LIVE AGAIN ` ` LA LA ` ` WE SHALL LIVE AGAIN ` CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE