MALE VOICE: Today is best day ever. Moving day! For who? Answer - the Boov. Who are the Boov? Answer - best species ever at running away. P.A.: All Boov settlers, please report to your assigned transport. You are allowed one carry-on. Excusing me. Sorries. Excusing me. Pardon the me, friend. Boov do not friend. Owpain! Uh-oh. Sorries. Who am I? I am Oh. I has been given this name by my many, many friends. Good morning! Oh! Hi, guys. BOTH: Oh. Hello. Oh. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! ALL: Oh! I am very excitement to make a new fresh start! We are all moving to best planet ever for to hiding. Our new home! Ooh! (LIGHTS CLUNK) (GASPS) Captain Smek! My fellow Boov! I has saved us again! (CLUNK!) Ow! Bit lower. No, no, no, stop! Uh, up a bit. Up a bit. Perfect. Walk away! Walk away! My fellow... My... ..fellow... ..Boov. Good news! (GASPS) Thanks to my leadership skills, cowering, running and pulling a skedaddle, we are safe from our enemy, the Gorg. (CROWD CHEERS) Ooh! Nasty! (GASPS) (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) Give Daddy some sugar! Oh! Captain Smek has saved us again! We are now arrived at the best hiding place yet in the Milky Way. And the Gorg are lactose-intolerant. Oh! Genius! They will never find us here. (CHEERING) Thank you! Best of yet - this planet is full of great stuff. Look at these delicious fruits! (AIR ESCAPES) That makes me feel so good. (GASPS) What fun at a party! Boov do not party. Also, this planet is inhabited. But do not worry. The native savages are simple and backwards. (BABY COOS) (ALL SHRIEK) Ohh! They are so ugly, they are cute! Everything you need to know about them can be found in these comprehensive pamphlets. Comprehensive pamphlet. Comprehensive pamphlet. They are lucky the Boov have come. Alright, Boov. Invade on three. One, two, three! SONG: # Ah-ooh # If you've got troubles, let 'em go # Let 'em soar so high... # Rejoice, humanspeople! The Boov are arrived! Now we are turning off your gravity temporarily so as to make your mandatory relocation easier - and more fun! So, what is up? You are! # Monday morning Shoot up like a rocket # Yeah, the sun is shining Keep it in my pocket # Got this golden feeling Never gonna stop # It just goes on and on # Keep on clapping Join the celebration # Turn the music louder... # Arggh! You'll never catch me! Oh! (YELPS) Enjoy you the frozen, sweetened bovine secretion as we take this short flight to Happy Humanstown. # Today I opened my eyes and now I'm so happy and free # I got my friends by my side, and that's all that matters to me # So come on, get up and join in, 'cause this is just what you need # Let's do it all day long # Today I opened my eyes and now I'm so happy and free # I got my friends by my side, and that's all that matters to me # So come on, get up... # This is so cool! Come on! OH: Fa-da! Humanspersons are happiness and joy forever in Happy Humanstown. Welcome to your new home. Wait, what? No! New home?! And rest of planet is for Boov. Win-win! # Ah-ooh # Don't let your worries get to you... # P.A.: Welcome, Boov settlers. All humans have been relocated. Your homes are now ready. Thanking you! (GASPS) Oh! (GASPS) This planet may be a bit of a fixing-it-upper, but that is OK. Boov are best at deciding what is useful and what is not. Ooh! Owpain! Step aside. Clean-up crew. ELECTRONIC VOICE: Useless. Ooh. (TOILET FLUSHES) Today, I starts a new life. With new friends. In a new home. (CHEERS) P.A.: Residents may now enter sector 179. That is me! And that is why today is best day ever! Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air. Able 2017 # So turn it up now! # (LIFT BELL DINGS) (GASPS) Arggh! Welcome home, neighbours! Boov do not have 'neighbours'. Oh, well, that is owing to the size and topography of our former planet. (SHOUTS) Hey! Can I borrowing a cup of sugar? (VOICE ECHOES) What?! But now our closer proximity can leads to friendship. (GROANS) Oh! You are all invited to my warming of house party. (ALL GROAN) Uh, say...five o'clock? Sure. Yes! (INHALES DEEPLY) (GIGGLES) Ooh! (EXHALES) Ew. Ooh! (SQUEAKS) (MIAOWS) (PURRS) WOMAN: Hey, Pig! Be careful up there! (LAUGHS) (CHUCKLES) I'm sorry, Pig. Mom's not here. It's just a video. (IN VIDEO) Hey, Mom. I think Pig wants to join us. (LAUGHS) It's not funny! (MIAOWS) Tip! (LAUGHS) Come on, Mom. It's just snow. I don't know anything about snow. We're from Barbados! We don't have snow! (LAUGHS) Whoa! (LAUGHS) Are you OK? I'm sending this to everyone. (RUMBLING) (MIAOWS) (GASPS) P.A. Sector 195 is ready for occupation. We can't wait for Mom, Pig. We gotta go. Right now! (JINGLING) (GASPS) Oh, no! Huh? (TWANG!) Ooh! (GRUNTS) Oh! (BEEP!) COMPUTER: Prepare for your dance attack! (DANCE MUSIC PLAYS) Oh! (GASPS) Oh! (LAUGHS) (MIAOWS) OK. Let's go find Mom. (MIAOWS) (TYRES SQUEAL) Hmm. (GASPS) Shhh. (LIFT BELL DINGS) Huh? OH: Neighbours! Hello! (GRUNTS) Please come in and... Hello? Hello? (SIGHS) And right. And left. Other left. (GASPS) Kyle! Right. No, left... Hello, friend Kyle. Oh! I am not your friend! Of course you are. We have had many enjoyable talks. No, we talk only because I'm not allowed to move! (LAUGHS) You are always saying the funny things. Perhaps you can say them at my warming of house party tonight. I will not. Parties are useless and take up valuable Boov time! Since you are at your busyness, I shall send an e-vite to you so you can join later during your leisure minute. Please do not send. I enjoy my leisure minute. I do not want... Fa-da! I have sent directions to my living space. Oh! RECORDING: Fa-da! I have sent directions to my living space. (ALL GASP, EXCLAIM) You sent directions to EVERYONE?! What?! Um... It is not my fault! Why for put 'send' button right next to 'send all'? It's just bad design. Your invite has been sent to entire galaxy! Uh-oh. "Uh-oh" is right! Our enemy, the Gorg, will receive it and... can use directions for to find us! CROWD: The Gorg?! (ALARM SOUNDS) (SCREAMS) (YELPS) OH: Fa-da! You have doomed our species! No, please. I did not mean to. I am sorries! You are arresting! No! I...I was just trying to invite you to my... (WHIMPERS) Security has been compromised! Arrest that Boov! Autopilot, I needs help! AUTOPILOT: Help is available in Paris at Boov Headquarters. No, Autopilot! Any place but Paris! You must takes me to a place with no Boovs. The only remaining spot on planet with no Boov is Antarctica. Group hug! (PENGUINS CHATTER) Ohhh! Yes! Antarctica is perfect! Take me there now! I am sorry. You are fugitive Boov. Initiating self-destruct. No! Do not initiate! I am not a fugitive! Arggh! (SHRIEKS) (SIGHS) Oh! (GASPS) No! Oh! (YELLS) (TYRES SCREECH) (GASPS) (GRUNTS) Arggh! Oh, no. (PIG HOWLS) (YELPS) Uh... (DOORBELL CHIMES) (PANTS) ('JINGLE BELLS' PLAYS QUIETLY) Whew! (MACHINE VIBRATES) (GIGGLES) (BOTH BELCH) (MIAOWS) (INHALES DEEPLY) Arggh! Arggh! (GRUNTS) Gotcha! Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha! Eugh! Whatfor are you did this? I am Boov, beloved by all humans! I know what you are. Oh, excellent! Can I come into the out now? No, you cannot "come into the out" now. You can never come into the out ever again. Uh...but I can. You are just having to take away the piece of wood. Well, then I will have to... have to... I will shoot forth the lasers from my eyeballs! You can do that? Yes. Well, if you shoot your eye lasers, then I'll have no choice but to... ..explode your head. You humans cannot to explode... We can too! We just don't much. It's considered rude. Then... Then I am granting you a truce. You are not to exploding heads and I will not do my devastating eye lasers. (SQUEALS) (PURRS) OK. Truce. So, can I come into the out now? No. This is what you get for stealing planets and abducting people. Oh, you are thinking a mistake. Boov do not steal and abduct. No, Boov liberate and befriend. (GIGGLES) (MOM LAUGHS) Guess who made this one! Hmm. This is so beautiful! (BOTH YELP) M-Mom! What's happening? I don't know, honey. (YELPS) (MIAOWS) Tip! It'll be OK! COMPUTER: Life form detected. Not human. Move along. CAPTAIN SMEK: Enjoy you the frozen, sweetened bovine secretion as we take this short flight to Happy Humanstown. Mom! It's all your fault. You stole my mom! Smell ya later, Boov. No, wait! Smell me now! I can to fixing your car. I seen you has broken it. I didn't break it. I'm a very good driver. It's...supposed to leak like that. (CAR ENGINE CRANKS) (SIGHS) (ENGINE CONTINUES CRANKING) (CAR DOOR SHUTS) (DOORBELL CHIMES) Can I come into the out now? I know the fugitive Boov has made yet another in a series of horrible, yet unintentionally humorous mistakes. But let me reassure you, the signal he broadcast is being handled. (CHUCKLES) We are definitely not doomed. And we're out. We are doomed! (ALL GASP) The Gorg are going to find us again! The maniac Boov has ruined everything! This is bad. And I really love this planet. Look at all the great stuff they've got. Like this! A headband! And for evening wear, you slide it down, you've got a beautiful spare tyre. I love it! Ooh! Very nice! Who would want to leave THIS behind? I have got to fix this. (GASPS) I know! Summon the Big Brain Boovs! The smarty-pants of all smarty-panty Booviness! Gentleboov, I want ideas. (ALL GRUNT) Oh! We could create an alternate reality with no Gorg in it, then go live there. Yes! I love it! How long would that take? Based on our current technology... ..1.7 million years. That's a lot of years, Toni. Moving on! We could lay on the ground... Yes! ..and make the Gorg think we are dead. Next! Ooh! Ooh! What if we logged into the fugitive Boov's email and cancelled his e-vite... Shush! Or we could log into the fugitive Boov's email and cancel his invitation, and, um... What was that? So the Gorg never receive it. ..so the Gorg never receive it! Now, type in the password and cancel that message! It was a good idea of me to make all passwords 'password'. It's so easy to remember. (BUZZER SOUNDS) (ALL EXCLAIM) It did not work! His password is...unique! No! (BREATHLESSLY) Unique? Boov are not...unique! (MOANS) Fetch me my inhaler! (GASPS) Boy, that works! His mistaking is leading the Gorg right to us. Show me his invite! (DANCE MUSIC) OH: You are all invited to a party! Just head to the Milky Way. Turn right at the Big Dipper. Third planet from the Sun. Look for my balloons! Party! Come if you like to have fun! My best friend Kyle will be there! Kyle! Kyle! Kyle! Come party! (SCREAMS) Kyle! He is NOT my friend! The internet does not lie! Oh! You know him, you can find him. I am putting you in charge! But, Captain, it is not my job! I am only a mid-level traffic Boov! I admire your cowardice, Officer. Thank you. But I want every Boovcop on Planet Smekland searching this city. We need his password, or we will all be destroyed by the Gorg! Find him! That Boov has made his final mistake. Fa-da! You were supposed to fix it! What is this? I calls it 'Slushious'. (CAR PLAYS PARTY MUSIC) 'Slushious'?! It makes excellent fuel and comes in fun-to-say flavours. Grape Escape. Tangerine Twist. Busta Lime! (LAUGHS) Mom's gonna kill me. Now I am prepared to accept one of your traditional gestures of human gratitude. Actually, our tradition is to punch you in the nose. Hold still. No! Your gratitude is implied. (GASPS) You can drives first. (DOORBELL CHIMES) Then I can... Oh. You're not coming. I'm trying to HIDE from the Boov. I'm not bringing one with me. You'll just turn me in. No! I just needs a ride! I haves official Boov business out of in town. Me too. But... Arggh! But I fixes your car! So? I let you out of the freezer. We're even. (PARTY MUSIC PLAYS) Oh! Oh! Oh! (YELPS) What did you do to my car?! What dos you mean? It should to hover much better now. It's a car! It didn't hover at all before! How do you stop this thing?! (WHIMPERS) Oh! Oops. I have apparently reversing the proceed and anti-proceed controls. Yeah, I noticed. Stop is go. Go is stop. Wait! Whyfor you do this? Boovs and humans are friends! We're not friends. You kidnapped my mom! Who is Mimom? No, MY mom! What did I say? (CLANG!) (LAUGHS) (SHRIEKS) I knows how to find her. How? That information is at Boov Central Command. At the Great Antenna. What? In Paris! Now, let me to inside! Paris. Hmm. Then promise. What? Promise you'll help me find her or I'm leaving your Boov butt. I promise! But if you do not wish to be capturing, it must be now! (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) Fine! Get in. (SIGHS) Oui, oui, Pig! Paris, here we come! (GROANS) We're gonna find out where they put Mom. OK. I shall set the GPS to take us straight to the Paris. COMPUTER: Destination entered - Antarctica. Hey, what are you doing? Oh! How did that happen? Keep your Boov paws off my car! (DING!) Whoa! (MIAOWS) Your vehicle is infested. (CHUCKLES) It's not infested. He's my pet. His name is Pig. Don't touch him. (PURRS) Now he is vibrating. (GASPS) Is he going to explode?! No. He's just purring. Why do you haves this thing? Is it useful? Does it give meat or milk? What? Ew! No. You just have pets. For fun. And companionship. You has me for companion on the ship. Yeah, well, Pig is better. (CHIRPS) If cat is Pig, what is your name? (WHIRRING) (SIGHS) Gratuity Tucci. But my friends call me Tip. Tip. I said my FRIENDS. But we ARE friends. All humans and Boov. Captain Smek has decided. Captain Smek is an idiot. (GASPS) Untrue! Captain Smek is genius. And best at running away. Have you not heard the legend of the Shusher? Long ago, our enemy, the Gorg, invited the Boov to a peace meeting. (ICE CLINKS) (SCREAMS) But Smek wisely fled in terror. And he took a great trophy - the Shusher. Run away! (ROARS) TIP: (CHUCKLES) Why is it called the Shusher? Shush! Mmm. Whatever. Arggh! (HOWLS) Ugh! Huh? Huh? Aha! OH: Oooh! Aw. Oooh! Aw. Oooh! Aw. Oooh! Aw. Seriously? You guys had to ruin the Statue Of Liberty? Er, Statue of Smek. You will not get away with this. Arggh! Boov patrol! They are looking for you! (YELPS) Oh, no! Arggh! Whew! (GASPS) Oh, no! What's that? Ow! (WHIMPERS) Hey! Don't distract the driver! Whew! KYLE: Huh? Aha! Busta Lime. (LAUGHS) "Busta Lime"! (WHIMPERS) Owpain! Shh! (WHISPERS) Owpain. (SIGHS) Ooh! OK, pee break. Ooh. I too has to break pee. Or, as you calls it, the number one. We also has the number two. OK... And the number three. OK! It is a good thing I dos not have to go the number three. It would not be safe for you. Eugh! We only dos it once a year. I would not call it a holiday, but you dos need to take the day off. That's enough! (SCREAMS) Whoa! You can't come in here. This is the girls' room. (LOCKS DOOR) (CRUNCH!) Arggh! Do not eat the blue mints! (SPITS) Ohhh! Oh! Eugh! Thankfully, there is a large bowl of lemonade. (SLURP!) Ohhh! Do not drink the lemonade! Arggh! Ugh! Be out in a second. # We're going to Paris! # (GROWLS) # Going to see my mom! # Oui, oui, oui! (GIGGLES) Takes your time! (DOORBELL RINGS) (MIAOWS) Ant-arc-ti-ca. Here I come! Fugitive Boov! Huh? Whoa! Hold still for arresting! Best friend Kyle! I am not your friend! But I will be a hero Boov for getting your passw... Oh! Oh, yes! You has in nick-time saved us! (PUFFS ANGRILY) What is the purpose of your face? (GRUNTS) Owpain! You were gonna ditch me? No! Liar! I never lie! Yes, you do! And you know how I know? Well, actually... Because every time you lie, you turn green! I dos not! I... Poomp. Ah! (GROWLS) Open the door, you lying, frog-faced squishy toy! Stop! I need your... (GROANS) Oh! You promised to help me find my mom! Then I un-promise! That's not how it works! You have to help me get to Paris! I will not! Oh! Stop! I need to... Arggh! I must hide! I am speaking the English at you. Whyfor do you not understands me? Oh, I 'understands'. I just don't care. Freezing! Look out! Arggh! Oh, come on! Arggh! Stop! I need your password! (YELPS) No! Go! No, no! (BOOM!) All I wanted was his password. (HUMS CHEERFULLY) This is not a sustainable friendship model. CAPTAIN SMEK: So. I assume by now we have apprehended the fugitive? Um... Anybody? You. The purple one. Not that purple. The other purple. The other purple. Not that purple. Not that purple. Not that purple. The other purple. That one. Yes, you! Oh! So, where is he? We do not know, sir. What? This is number one disaster! His message must not reach the Gorg. This planet was hard to find, and I will not abandon it! Someone fetch me my stress blankie! (SOBS) Oh! (LAUGHS) (BUBBLES POP) So soothing! Mmm! (HORN HONKS) Aha! Officer Kyle! Now, here is a Boov who knows how to do his job. Tell me, you have found the fugitive? Yes... Joyful exclamation! And... where is he? Well, uh...there is a tiny problem. (LAUGHS) (LAUGHS UNEASILY) Tiny. As long as it's tiny, who cares? (CHUCKLES) Well, before I got the password... ..I erased him. (POPS) OH'S MESSAGE: Come party! Come party! Come party! Come party! Come party! (WHIMPERS) (RIP!) OW! Quit it! Sorry. Look, Paris is danger for both of us. It crawls with Boov. Dos you have a plan for once we are get there? Hmm? Not really. But I have hope. Oh! You are bad at math. Excuse me? I got an A in geometry. I am only saying, Boov are superior in this way. If probability for success falls below 50%... ..Boov give up. You do not. Exactly! Enough with the ripping! (CHUCKLES) OK, OK. Tell you what. Let's have some tuneage. # Come on I wanna dance in the dark # Come... # (CACOPHONOUS NOISE) Ooh! What is that?! Boov song. (MIAOWS) It is called Motionless And Obedient. Very big hit. No, no, no, no, no! Not in my car. Driver gets to pick. # I wanna run wild in the middle of the night... # This is not even music. This is just noise. # Bodies glowing in the night # Nothing in between our skins but the rhythm # Make sure that your heartbeat beats with the rhythm... # Arggh! Involuntary physical response! You have tricked me into listening to a debilitating sonic weapon! You know, if you want humans to not hate you, you could start by liking some of our stuff. (WAILS) # And never stop # We're gonna light up the night... # Confusion! What is happening to my body? It's called dancing! Boov do not dancing! (LAUGHS) I can tell. But you're getting the hang of it. How long before this kills me?! I am not in control of my own extremities! That's it. Work it! I do not want it to work! Hey, you know what? 'Boov' rhymes with 'groove'. Shake your Boov thang! Arggh! It is shaking in a most undignified way! (LAUGHS) Oh, no! My hands are in the air like I just do not care! (LAUGHS) This is not how a Boov behaves! I am overheated with shame! I must cool my core! (DOORBELL CHIMES) Wait! What are you doing? I will returning! We were having fun! Oh! Oh? # Ooh, ooh, ooh Dancing in the dark... # TIP: (ON VIDEO) Come on, Mom. It's just snow! MOM: I don't know anything about snow. (TIP LAUGHS) Our first snow! Oh, whoa! (BOTH LAUGH) Are you OK? (LAUGHS) I'm sending this to... (GASPS) My temperature is back to happiness! And to show I do not hold against you any grudgement... (SPITS) ..I have brought you delicious snacking. Fa-da! Chewy plastic rings! (GRUNTS ANGRILY) Arggh! I really do not enjoy your human gratitude customs. Where have you been? You were gone forever! That is not accurate. 'Forever' is... I thought you were dead! Or hurt! Or...I don't know. But you cannot just leave someone alone like that! Put yourself in my shoes. How could I wears your shoes? My pods are too small. It's an expression. It means try to feel how someone else feels. (SIGHS) I'm just a kid. I'm not supposed to be by myself all the time. This is... this is child endangerment. Which is a crime, by the way. But when I founded you, you were already alone. So I thinks it is normal for you. When Boov are young, we are kept in the warming oven. Is this normal for humanspersons? Well, usually we don't cross the Atlantic by ourselves until we're 16. No! None of this is normal! Don't you get it? You ruined everything! I was finally happy here...there, where I lived with my mom. Do you know how hard it was for me to fit in? How long that took? Seventh-grade girls are mean! Yes, I sees that! I did not realise! We will resume the finding of Mimom. (GROANS) Stop saying that! She's just MY mom. Not yours. Mine. How do you not understand this? How would you feel if some horrible aliens took your mother from you? That could not to happen. Boov are not having mimoms. Boov don't have families. Huh. No wonder you take things and don't care about anybody else. So, your mimom... ..is a very important humansperson to you. More important than others. To not belong with her... causes you being sad. But recent moments ago, you are kicking on me and yelling. Which is seeming more to be mad than sad. Well, sometimes it's both. So... ..you are sad-mad. (PIG PURRS) Hmm. Humans are more complicated than it said in the pamphlet. I vacuumed here as fast as I could. Whoa! Whatfor is your plan for figuring out the dumb Boov's password? (ALL WHIMPER) I got nothing! Oh, please, come on! I need ideas! You! The purple one! (ALL WHIMPER) Oh, come on! So? Uh, we...we could type in random numbers and letters? I like it! Oh! (CHUCKLES) Get those big brains plugged in and working! Away! You know what the Gorg will do if they find us. Chomp, chomp, chomp! (ALL SCREAM) OH: And that is why we keep running away. Whoa. Why do these Gorg hate you so much? Because they are Gorg. We calls Gorg 'the takers'. Because if you has something, they takes it. Like, if you has a sandwich. Or a planet... No, no, I...I get it. But...they're not coming to THIS planet, right? Oh, no, no, no, no. Not to worry. The Big Brain Boov will to fix my mistake. But I will still be very punished. We has a rule. Nine mistakes and you are out. And how many mistakes do you have? 62. Hmm. (WHIMPERS) You know, when I'm stressed out, my mom tells me jokes. Boov do not do telling jokes. Oh, it's not that hard. I'll teach you. Knock, knock. Y-you would say, "Who's there?" You are there. No, just ask me. Well, who is there? Now I say, "The interrupting cow." Now you say, "The interrupting cow who?" Let's just do it. Knock, knock. Oh, uh, who is there? The interrupting cow. The interrupting cow... Moo! (LAUGHS) Well, no, you did not let me finish my response. I was to say, "The interrupting co..." Moo! (LAUGHS) Oh, now, you did it again. (GASPS) Oh! That is the joke! The cow is to being an interrupting cow, and therefore interrupts me! I know. That's why it's funny. Moo! Let me fi... Moo! That's enough. I'm the interrupting cow! Knock it off! Moo! Oh! Don't make me get out more tape! Moo! (ACCORDIONS HUM) (GASPS) So many Boovs! I said this was dumbness. I said I am doomed. But dos you listen? No! Oh, that's enough. You are driving me to the crazy! It is never too late to run away. That is the Boov motto. Yes, but we're not doing that. I have a plan. Is your plan to run away? Because other-way-wise, it is stupid! All we have to do is sneak into the city, get into the Great Antenna, use it to find my mom and then sneak out again - see? But...but it still will not work. Because my face is known. If I am seen by any Boov, I am 100% popular for being arrested. Aha! What if I could fix that? (GULPS) SONG: # La la la la # La la la la # La la la la # La la la la... # Hold still. (WHIMPERS) First, a little beauty mark. Hey. Letting me see. Whoa. Whoa! Not yet. Give to me, give to me! Give me that mirror! (GASPS, SQUEALS) It is like looking at a completed stranger! No, I'm not done. It's not even... You are a worker of miraculous transformation! Who is this Boov? I do not know! (SHRIEKS EXCITEDLY) Alright, Oh. Whoa! Ow! Owpain! # Like I'm the only one that you'll ever love # Like I'm the only one who knows your heart... # (WHIMPERS NERVOUSLY) (CHUCKLES) COMPUTER: Express elevator departing. Whoa! This is uber freaky. (CHUCKLES) THESE are the smartest Boov you have? Shh-shh-shh! You must be very quiet. You do not want to break their concentra... (SCREAMS) OH'S MESSAGE: Come party! Come party! Oh, what is it? I thought the Big Brain Boovs would have stopped my invitation by now. But they have still not figured out my password. How is this possible?! Wait a minute. Does this mean those horrible monster Gorg thingies will come to Earth? To Smekland, yes! And what happens then? Th-th... Then... ..there will be no finding of Mimom! (GASPS) Then you've got to fix this! Yes. Hurry! Uh, by to the way, is your skull flexible? What?! Never mind. It will be probably OK. Hold still. Whoa! Wow! (GASPS) 30 seconds to doom! I shall input my password. It is... .."My name is Oh and Captain Smek is great and anyone who does not think that is a poomp...1." (CHUCKLES) Wonder why no-one guessed that. I do not know! (GASPS) It didn't work? Impossible! That is password! That is p... Oh, no. Caps lock. Come on, come on, come on, come on! Come party! Come party! Come party! Come party! Come party! Come party! Huh? Come party... (GRUNTS) Yes! (GIGGLES) Yay! (ALL CHEER) Fa-da! It has worked. It worked! Oh! You did it, Oh! Oh! Oh! (SIGHS) That was closeness. OK. On your feet. You still have to find my mom. Oh, that is simplicity. We shall now searching on... Lucy. Lucy Tucci. "Lucy Tucci". Australia. Observe Mimom. That's not funny. This is not your mimom? Are you kidding? That's not her! Sure? (GASPS) I know, I know, OK? You've been saying that for two weeks. Please! She has big green eyes and beautiful brown skin. Mom. So tell me where she is. Or find me a Boov who can. Please. Oh! Gratuity Tucci looks just like tiny Mimom! Huh? Gratuity Tucci? Whyfor... Thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you! (LAUGHS) I can't believe it! My mom's in Australia! And I has cancelled my e-vite. I can finally come out of the hiding. Yes! (LAUGHS) Uh-oh. Well, well, well. (GASPS) Hello? Hold my crown. And be very careful. It's the only one. (CLEARS THROAT) Well, well, well. Did you really think you could escape? Escape? No, no, no! You see, I was just coming to tell you... Despite your elaborate disguise, the computer recognised you as... ..the fugitive Boov! (ALL GASP) Whoa! But he's a hero Boov now. Yes! I has fixed my mistake! Yes, but before that, you has made your mistake. But I... And many mistakes before that. Wait. I have not... Many, many, many, many! Actually... MANY mistakes before that. So I still has to erase you. Why? You cannot guarantee you would not make a mistake again. But I would not. But you might. But I would not. But you might. But I would not. We could go round and round. Let's do it again! But I would not. But you might. But I would not. I love this! But I would not! Arggh! Bored now. But I would... Shush! Erase him! (WHIMPERS) Drop the bubble guns! Or I will mess with this... ..gravity...thingy. She's bluffing. She could not possibly reach the gravity thingy. Whoa! Curse you and your tippy-toe tallness! Huh. But no problem. Boov technology is far too complicated for simple humansgirl to figure out. Excuse me? Uh...um... This humansgirl got an A in geometry. (YELPS) She figured it out! Run for my life! Out of my way! I am captain! Whoa! (ALL SCREAM) Hmm? (GRUNTS) Grab on! Oh, no! I can't hold you! You weigh, like, a thousand pounds! Ha ha ha! Let go. What?! Trust me! Whoa! Oh! Oh! (CHUCKLES) Sorry. It is my duty to run away first. Poomp. What are you waiting for? I cannot touch. It will not work if I drive it. Oh! Fine. I'll drive. Owpain! You are terrible driver! Oh! Whoa! (BOTH GIGGLE) Arggh! (EXCLAIMS) Ohh! Ooh! (WHIMPERS) Whoa! Come on! Ohhh! Come on, come on! Bon appetit. Oh, no, you don't! I am not paying for that. (BOTH LAUGH) Arggh! Whew! (SCREAMS) Whoa! Oof! Oh! Arggh! Come on, you stupid horse! Ow! (GROANS) Whew! That was cl... (PURRS) Aha! This time, I've got you, and you cannot escape! COMPUTER: Fugitive Boov detected. I was wrong. Arggh! Ooh. Jump! Oh, no! Oh! Arggh! Whoa. Look! I has found our car. Pig! I do not know whyfor you brought that. We already hads food in the car. It's not food. It's art. Oh. (DOORBELL RINGS) Then it is bad. Stars do not look like that. It's not about how they look. It's...about how they feel. They feel hot. (LAUGHS) OK, math whiz, how long till we get to Australia? 17.9348 hours. And then Gratuity Tucci will see Mimom. (LAUGHS) Whoa! Hear that, Pig? I can't wait to tell Mom I actually went to Paris! Which, you know, she always wanted to do. Hey, maybe we could both come back here. We do have a flying car now. How do you say 'cat' in French? (MIAOWS) Oh, I think it's 'chat'. (GIGGLES) Hmm. What is the purpose of your face? I... ..has confusion. I do not wish to be erased. But maybe Captain Smek is right. It is possible I will continue making hilarious mistakes. (CHUCKLES) Probably. That is not making me feel better. Nobody's perfect. You know, my mom says your mistakes are what make you human. That is not what makes you Boov. (CHUCKLES) Gratuity Tucci... ..before we came, Captain Smek telled us that the humans needed us, that the humans were just like the animals, and that we could, to make them better, teach to them. We were told the humans were simple and backwards. It... It is what we thought. But I am thinking now... ..that we were thinking wrong. And that Captain Smek is the wrongest. I am thinking the Boov should never have come to Smekland. Uh...to Earthland. So I am saying... the sorry to you, Gratuity Tucci. Call me Tip. It was a new home, a new country. I tried to make friends at school, but I was, like, this nerd from Barbados. But you dids to get an A in geometry. (CHUCKLES) Yeah, I did. I know when the other Boovs said "Oh", they were not happy to see me. The true is, among Boov, I do not fit in. I fit out. She is so amazing. (GASPS) She saved up everything she had so we could move and things would be better for us. Oh! I cannot wait to meet Mimom! (BOTH LAUGH HYSTERICALLY) "My name is Captain Smek! Shush, shush, shush!" "Boov technology is FAR too complicated for simple humansgirl to figure out." (BOTH LAUGH) SONG: # Like the rainfall # Like a cannonball # I wish I could take your heart # Keep it in a cardboard box # So when it gets hard You'll never be far # And your love won't be lost # And as the bridges fall apart # I'll still find a way to cross # And even if you are Lost among the stars # Your love won't go off # When I try to hide from your love # I can't deny it # Oh, baby, maybe # It's just my calling # But I keep falling # I keep falling for you # Like the rainfall # Like a cannonball # Ooh-ooh-ooh # Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh # Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh # Like a cannonball... # (SNORING) (SHRIEKS) (GASPS) Arggh! (MIAOWS) How did they find us?! I do not know! (GASPS) Oh! (MIAOWS) (BOTH WHIMPER) Wait. They're not attacking. Because they are running away. Why are they running away? There can only be one reason. (KLAXON SOUNDS) Gorg. This makes no sense. I stopped the message. Arggh! Gorg cannot to finding us. Then how did they? There must be some other reason! Arggh! Whoa! Oh! Behind us! Engage weapons system. We have a weapons system?! Go, Burrito Torpedo! BOTH: Yes! We've been hit! We're losing Grape Escape! We lost Tangerine Twist! If we lose Busta Lime, I cannot control! Click and ticket. We are to crash! Oh! (ALL SCREAM) (THUMP!) (BOTH GRUNT) (ENGINE SPLUTTERS) No, no, no, no, no! Slushious, no! (GROANS) Don't just stand there! Help! Come on! Come on, come on, come on! Slushious! No! She's gone. We are doomed. Now we'll never make it to Australia. I will now sing the Boov death song. (CLEARS THROAT) (WAILS) (GASPS) A Gorg ship! It is rude to interrupt the death song. Maybe you could take the parts from it to fix our car. I cannot. Those are Gorg parts. They are metric. We're not getting this close and giving up. Come on! No! Always with the running towards danger! Stop being such a Boov. It's our only chance! Come on! No, no... (GROWLS) (SPLUTTERS) This has low probability of success! Let's go. Wait! For what? For you to change your mind. (SIGHS) Come on! (WHIMPERS) (ROARS) There's no pilot. It is just a drone! Whew! (SIGHS) Ooh! That could have been badness. But we are not safety. Gorg mother ship will be here soon enough. (GRUNTS) Can you use any of this? Broken. Useless. Likely to cause thermonuclear fission. Um... (SHRIEKS EXCITEDLY) Uh...wh-wh-wh-what is it? (LAUGHS) It is Gorg super-chip! (SQUEALS) Why is it called a super-chip? It is mostly marketing. But it is key, for the Gorg are having machines that are stronger and better at everything, so we can never fight them with equaltude. Can we use it to fix Slushious? Yes, yes! The Slushious will fly again. Yes! (LAUGHS) (SHRIEKS) Mm-hm. It was low probability of success. Some Boov you are! Mmm. (GASPS) Quickly. We must fix the Slushious and find Mimom. MY mom! That is the thing I said. I knew this would all work out! BOTH: Whoa! You were awesome! We're gonna find my mom, you're gonna show everybody the super-chip and be a big hero, and even Captain Smek will have to... Whoa. That's a lot of people. (CHEERING) Bye, Boov! Get lost! (ALL SHOUT) TIP: Wow. You guys really ARE good at running away. Yes. Yes, we are. (GASPS) (MIAOWS) Look over there! That's where we saw my mom! BOOV: Hurry up! It is the last ship! It's OK, Pig. I'll be back with Mom. (PIG MIAOWS) We're almost there! Over here. What? Hurry! I don't understand. She's in there? Yes. Tell me the truth. There is no time. You can come with me. You will be safety. My mom's not on that ship, is she? You promised to help me find her and you're leaving?! You lied to me. No! A lie is a bad thing. I did a thing so you can live. Well, I'm not going. My mom is here. You will never find her. It is 100%. Staying now does not make hope. Gorg mother ship will be here soon. It destroys planets! We must run away now! No! It is true. Humanspersons cannot even understand simple, simple things. I am saving you! I am being your friend! No, you're just running away. You don't leave your family. But you can't understand that because you're just a Boov! You've NEVER been my friend. (GASPS) Wait! COMPUTER: Final escape pod departing. (GRUNTS) (GASPS) Oh! Agh! (CROWD SHOUTS) (PANTS NERVOUSLY) (GASPS) (SIREN SOUNDS) Oh, I hate upon the Gorg! They're always finding us! The Gorg mother ship! (ALL GASP) We are doomed! Run away! Make a path! I'm holding a baby! It is the fugitive Boov! He is running towards the danger! Stop him! (GROWLS) Whoa! Undo! (EXCLAIMS) Whoa! Captain! We are achieving new highest speeds! Huh! What has you done? What is that thing? It is Gorg super-chip. What? Gorg drone crashed, and I ran to it and I found the chip. Enough! You ran TO a Gorg? (GASPS) He runs TOWARDS the danger? What kind of Boov is he? He is like a...a Superboov! No, no, no. He is not a 'Superboov'. There is only one Superboov on this ship, and you know who it is. You're looking at him. I invented running away! And look at this. I have the Shusher. I am your captain. But you are not good captain. Wha...?! You telled us these things, and we all believed them. I believed them. But...then I met a humansperson. And she is not like you said. Eh... She is...brave and smart... ..and cares about other humanspersons in a way that we Boov do not even care about each other. (ALL MURMUR) She even cares about me. And I've done very little to earn that. The Boov may be superior in many ways... Mmm. Yeah. ..but not in the ways that I now thinks are most important. Oh, big deal! I have had enough. Shush! (GASPS) That is enough shushing. How dare you shush a shushing?! Oh is right. We need a new captain. I thinks it should be Oh! Me? No! No! He cannot be captain. I have the Shusher. I am captain! Not anymore! No! He will not know how to operate it! It is very complicated. Heavy on one end, light on the other... Shush! Booyah! Whoo! No. I am not a leader Boov. I makes far too many mistakes. You are not the only Boov who makes mistakes. For examples, my mistake is... not being your friend. All hail Captain Oh! (ALL CHEER) I saw who did that! Arggh! I hold grudges, you know! (GRUNTS) (SOBS) Our new leader! Thanks to you, Oh! (ALL CHEER) Hooray for Captain Oh! Hey, nice job! Yay, Oh! Oh, you're the best! Want me to host party, Oh? SONG: # I still remember # When things were broken # But put together # The cracks will close in # I still remember # When time was frozen # What seemed forever # Was just a moment # Hurry up, hurry up # There's no more waiting # We're still worth saving # Feel the light # Shining in the dark of night # Remember what we forgot I know it's a long shot # But we're bringing it all back We're bringing it all back # Feel the light # Shining like the stars tonight # Remember what we forgot I know it's a long shot # But we're bringing it all back We're bringing it all back # Feel the light # Shining in the dark of night # Remember what we forgot I know it's a long shot # Here we go, here we go # Feel better now, feel better now # Here we go, here we go # It's better now Feel better now. # (KNOCKING) Go away. OH: No, you are supposed to be saying, "Who is there?" Then I am to be saying... (GASPS) Oh? .."Moo!" Oh! (BOTH LAUGH) (PIG CHIRPS) I can't believe it! But I saw your ship leave! Oh! But you came back! What are you doing here? (PURRS) It is where I belongs. You and Pigcat are my friends. Oh, and alsos, too - I gave you a promise. (GENTLE MUSIC) # Hurry up, hurry up # There's no more waiting # We're still worth saving # Feel the light # Shining in the dark of night # Remember what we forgot I know it's a long shot # But we're bringing it all back We're bringing it all back # Feel the light # Shining like the stars tonight # Remember what we forgot I know it's a long shot # But we're bringing it all back We're bringing it all back # Here I go, here I go # Feel better now, feel better now # Here we go, here we go # It's better now Feel better now. # Oh, Tippy. My beautiful girl. I've been looking everywhere, Mom. (SOBS) I was so scared we'd never see each other again. Oh, Mom, I never would have stopped looking until I found you. Oh! (BOTH SOB) (GASPS) They are still looking. (GASPS) Gorg are not the takers. Boov are! W-we must demonstrate our affections later. Uh, there is still one problem. Um, excuse me, what is that? That is Gorg mother ship. It is here to destroy the planet. It's going to destroy the planet?! Yes. But I haves a plan. (ALL YELP) Oh? (CENTRAL LOCKING CHIRPS) What are you doing? I am sorry. Tip cannot come into the out now. I am fixing my mistake. Huh? Oh! You can't do this on your own! Maybe not. But I haves hope. (GRUNTS) No! Stop! No! No, no, no, please don't do this by yourself! (MIAOWS) No! Don't! No, no, no! Oh! Stop! Look! Hey! Gorg! Oh, it is useless to yell. GORG! They're not gonna see him. It's not gonna work! Merry Christmas. Now?! Just open it! Oh! Thank you, sweetheart, but... What...what are you doing?! Distracting the driver. (EXCLAIMS) (EXCLAIMS) (GRUNTS) (GEARS CRASH) (CHEERS) It worked! The ship's stopping! It's not gonna stop in time! Stop faster! He's got to get out of there! (GRUNTS) Mom, help me with this thing! Whoa! Oh! Oh! Oh! Run! Tip! Stop! Tip! (MELANCHOLY MUSIC) SONG: # The earth could quake to ruins # We could drift off in our sleep # I know we hate to think about it # But it's as real as you and me # It's as real # As you and me # The ocean crush the shore # And take us down forevermore... # Mom! (BOTH SOB) # I know we hate to think about it # But it's as real... # (REVERSING BEEPS) # If I should go # Hold my hand... # Oh! # If I should leave... # You're alive! But you scared me so bad! YOU were scared? I almost made a number three. Not too hard! It is still a possibility. (CLUNKING) But it's hard to let it go. All right, so, this is Tim. 34-year-old male. RTC. Multi-vehicle... VOICES OVERLAP I think about the car crash a lot. I know he caused it and I reacted the best way possible. But it's hard to let it go. SOMBRE MUSIC When I asked what had happened to him, the doctors said he really wore the impact ` any more and things would've been much worse. They said he was lucky ` lucky I wasn't going any faster. Thank you. SOMBRE MUSIC CONTINUES It's OK. MUSIC CONTINUES (HEAVY FOOTSTEPS APPROACH) (GASPS) (GASPS) (SPEAKS STRANGE LANGUAGE) (REPLIES) (SPEAKS) What was all that? Not all Gorg-speak has humans words. But it turns out Gorg was not here because of my invitation - though Gorg would have been happy to attend. Gorg was here because Gorg was tracking the rock. What was in that thing? Gorg family. It is entire next generation. All of them? All of them. No wonder they've been chasing you. Oh, not they. He. Apparently, that Gorg is last Gorg. That is why rock was so important. Without it, he was alonely and would some day be extinctly. Which made Gorg cranky and irrational and physically violent. He was just like humansgirl. He was... sad-mad. (CHEERING) Thanking you. Thanking YOU! High hand touching. Yeah, give it here! High hand touching! Up high! You are too slow. (LAUGHS) High hand touching! Oh, now, that hurt. (MIAOWS) (LIVELY CHATTER) Pigcat! (MIAOWS) (LAUGHS) Hey, Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Hello, friend Kyle. You know, I have that same colour... Hi, Mimom. (CHUCKLES) Hi, Oh. Awesome party, Oh! Parties are so much more fun when other people show up. (LAUGHS) Is it time to pick it up a level? Yes! (GIGGLES) This is gonna be sweet! Drop it like it has a high temperature! SONG: # Come on # I wanna dance in the dark... # Uh...what? # Come on We gonna light up the night # Come on I wanna dance in the dark # Come on We gonna light up the night... # Oh, no! Whoa! # I wanna dance in the dark... # What is happening to my body?! # We gonna light up the night Like shooting stars... # Oh! Oh! Uh-oh! BOTH: Shake your Boov thang! My hands are in the air like I just do not care! (LAUGHS) # I wanna dance in the dark And never stop... # OH: I has a new start in a new home with new friends. And now every day is best day ever! # Ooh, ooh, ooh Dancing in the dark # I wanna dance in the dark (SCRATCH MUSIC PLAYS) # We gonna light up the night # I wanna dance in the dark And never stop # We gonna light up the night Like shooting stars # Whenever you hear the sound... # OH: You are all invited to a party, party, party! Just head to the Milky Way. Turn right at the Big Dipper. Third planet from the Sun. Look for my balloons! Come party! OK, everybody, smile!