1 www.able.co.nz Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air. Copyright Able 2011. All right, everyone! This is a stick-up. Don't anybody move. Now, empty that safe. RATTLES Hoo-hoo! Money, money, money. Stop it, you mean old potato! Quiet, Bo Peep, or your sheep get run over. Help! Baa. Help us! Oh, no, not my sheep. Somebody do something. WILD-WEST MUSIC MECHANIZED VOICE: 'Reach for the sky!' Oh, no. Sheriff Woody. I'm here to stop you, One-eyed Bart. D-oh! How'd you know it was me? Are you going to come quietly? You can't touch me. I brought my dog with a built-in force field. I brought my dinosaur who eats force-field dogs. Rrrr, rrr, rrr! Yipes! You're going to jail, Bart. Say goodbye to the wife and tater-tots. BABY GURGLES MUSIC: "You've Got A Friend In Me" by Randy Newman You saved the day again, Woody. 'You're my favourite deputy.' # You've got a friend in me # You've got a friend in me Let's wrangle up the cattle. Let's wrangle up the cattle. # When the road looks rough ahead # And you're miles and miles from your nice warm bed Round 'em up! Round 'em up! # Just remember what your old pal said # Boy, you've got a friend in me Yee-ha! # Yeah, you got a friend in me Hey, Cowboy! # Some other folks might be a little bit smarter than I am # Bigger and stronger too...maybe # Bigger and stronger too...maybe Come on, Woody. # But none of them will ever love you the way I do # It's me and you, boy # And as the years go by Whoa! # Our friendship will never die # You're gonna see, it's our destiny # You've got a friend in me # You've got a friend in me All right! # Yeah, you've got a friend in me # Yeah, you've got a friend in me Score! # You've got a friend in me. # # You've got a friend in me. # Wow! Cool! What do you think? What do you think? Oh, this looks great, Mom. OK, birthday boy. OK, birthday boy. We saw that at the store! Wow! Look at that! That's so... Oh, my gosh! Wow! Look at that! That's so... Oh, my gosh! I think that's going to be enough. Can we leave it up till we move? Sure. Go get Molly, they'll be here soon. Sure. Go get Molly, they'll be here soon. OK. It's party time, Woody. Yeeeeeee-ha! Howdy, little lady. MOLLY GURGLES AND CHUCKLES 'Somebody's poisoned the water hole.' Come on, Molly. Oh, you're getting heavy. See you later, Woody! Pull my string, the birthday party's today? OK, everybody! Coast is clear. MOTOR WHIRRS IT SQUEAKS Ages three and up, it's on my box. I'm not supposed to baby-sit Princess Drool. FRENZIED CHATTER SIREN Hey, Hamm, look. I'm Picasso. I don't get it. You uncultured swine! What are you looking at, you hockey puck? Have you seen Slinky? Sir. No, sir! Sir. No, sir! OK, thank you. At ease. Hey, Slinky?! Right here. I'm red this time. No, Slink... No, Slink... All right, you can be red. Not now. (I got some bad news.) BAD NEWS? Sssh! Just gather everyone up. Got it. Be happy! SLINKY LAUGHS Staff meeting, everybody! Snake, Robot, podium duty. Hey, Etch, draw! D'oh! Got me again! You've been working on it. Fastest knobs in the West. We've got a staff meeting. Come on. Now, where is that... Ah! Who moved my doodle pad over here? HE ROARS How're you doing, Rex? Were you scared? Tell me honestly. I was close to being scared. I was close to being scared. I'm going for fearsome but I just don't feel it. I'm just coming off as annoying. Ow! Hi, Bo. I wanted to thank you, Woody, for saving my flock. Oh, hey! It was, er, nothing. What'd you say I get someone to watch the sheep tonight? He-he-he-he! Oh, yeah, I... Remember, I'm just a couple of blocks away. Come on, smaller toys up front. < Woody, come on! CLEARS THROAT > Oh, thanks, Mike. FEEDBACK Whoa, step back. FEEDBACK Whoa, step back. For crying out loud! > HE BLOWS INTO MIKE Hello? Check. Is that better? Everybody hear me? Up on the shelf? Great. OK, first item today... Oh, yeah. Has everyone picked a moving buddy? Moving buddy? You can't be serious! Are we supposed to have one already? Are we supposed to have one already? Do we have to hold hands? You think this is a joke? It's one week before the move, I don't want toys left behind. A moving buddy. If you don't have one, get one! All right, next... Oh, yes! Tuesday's Plastic Corrosion Awareness meeting was a big success and I want to thank Mr Spell for putting that on for us. Thank you, Mr Spell. OK. Er, yes, one minor note here. Andy's birthday party has been moved to today. Next, we have... Next, we have... What do you mean? His birthday's next week. Is his mom loosing her marbles? Obviously, she wanted the party before the move. I'm not worried. I'm not worried. Woody's been Andy's favourite since kindergarten. Hey, come on, Potato Head, if Woody says it's all right, darn it, it's good enough for me. He's never steered us wrong. He's never steered us wrong. Every Christmas and birthday we go through this. But what if Andy gets a dinosaur? A mean one. I don't think I can take rejection! No-one's getting replaced. This is Andy we're talking about. It doesn't matter how much we're played with. What matters is that we're here for Andy when he needs us, right? I hate to break up the meeting but...THEY'RE HERE! Guests at three o'clock! Stay calm, everyone! Hey! Er, meeting adjourned. Oh, boy, take a look at all those presents. Oh, boy, take a look at all those presents. I can't see a thing. We're garage-sale fodder for sure. We're garage-sale fodder for sure. Any dinosaur-shaped ones? They're all in boxes, you idiot. They're getting bigger! Wait, there's a nice little one over there. Aaaaaargh! We're doomed! We're doomed! All right! If I send out the troops, will you all calm down? Yes! Yes! We promise! Yes! Yes! We promise! OK! Save your batteries. That's using the old noodle. Establish a recon post downstairs. Code Red. You know what to do. Yes, sir! All right, men, you heard him. We are at Code Red. Recon plan Charlie. Execute! Let's move, move, move! CREAKING CHILDREN SHOUTING OK, everyone in the living room. It's time for the presents. All right, gangway. Gangway. And this is how we find out what is in those presents. OK! Who's hungry? Here come the chips. I've got cool ranch and barbecue. Ow! What in the...? Oh! I thought I told him to pick these up. Shouldn't they be there by now? Shouldn't they be there by now? These guys are professionals. They're the best. They're not lying down on the job. < Argh! Go on without me. Just go! A good soldier never leaves a man behind. CHILDREN SHOUTING OK, everybody, come on. Settle down, now, kids! Everybody, you sit in a circle. No, Andy, you sit in the middle. Good. And which present are you gonna open first? There they are. 'Come in, Mother Bird. This is Alpha Bravo.' This is it! Quiet, quiet! 'Andy's opening the first present.' Mrs Potato Head, Mrs Potato Head. Hey, I can dream, can't I? 'The bow's off. He's ripping the wrapping paper. It's a... It's... It's a... a lunch box. 'We've got a lunch box here.' A lunch box? Lunch box? 'OK, second present is... 'It's bed sheets.' Who invited that kid? Oh, only one left. 'OK, last present.' Last present! 'It's a big one. It's a... 'board game! Battleship.' TOYS CHEER Yeah. All right! Yeah. All right! Hey, watch it! Yeah. All right! Hey, watch it! Sorry, spudhead. Mission accomplished. Well done, men. Pack it up. I told you, nothing to worry about. I told you, nothing to worry about. I knew you were right. Never doubted you. Wait a minute. Oh, what do we have here? Turn that thing back on! 'Come in. Mom has pulled a present from the closet. Andy's opening it.' He's really excited about it, it's a huge package. A kid is in the way. A kid is in the way. CRACKLING It's a... CHEERING CRACKING It's a what? What is it?! Oh, no! You big lizard! We'll never know. Way to go, Rex(!) No, no! Turn them around! No, no! Turn them around! He's putting them in backwards. Plus is positive, minus is negative! Oh, let me! Let's go to my room, guys! Red alert! Andy is coming upstairs. Red alert! Andy is coming upstairs. There! 'Resume your positions.' Andy's coming! Everybody back to your places! Hurry! Where's my ear? Who's seen my ear? Out of my way! Here I come, here I come. Oh! CHILDREN SHOUT Hey, look! Its lasers light up. Take that, Zurgs! This is where the spaceship lands. And he does the karate-chop action! Come on down, guys! It's time for games! We got prizes! What is it? Can you see it? What's up there? What's up there? Woody, who's up there? WOODY COUGHS Woody? What are you doing under the bed? What are you doing under the bed? Er, nothing. I'm sure Andy was just a little excited. It's just a mistake. Well, that mistake is sitting in your spot, Woody. Have you been replaced? What did I tell you? No-one is getting replaced. Now, let's all be polite and give whatever it is up there a nice big Andy's room welcome! HE GULPS RESPIRATOR NOISE Buzz Lightyear to Star Command. Come in, Star Command. Star Command, come in. Do you read me? Why don't they answer? HE GASPS My ship! Blast! This'll take weeks to repair. Buzz Lightyear mission log, stardate 4072. My ship has run off course en route to Sector 12. I've landed on a strange planet. The impact awoke me from hypersleep. Terrain seems a bit unstable. No air read-out yet. There's no sign of intelligent life. Hello? Ho-yah! Aaaargh! Whoa, whoa, whoa! Did I frighten you? Didn't mean to. Sorry. Howdy! My name is Woody. And this is Andy's room. That's all I wanted to say. There has been a bit of a mix-up. This is my spot, the bed here. Law enforcement. I'm Buzz Lightyear, Space Ranger, Universe Protection Unit. My ship landed here by mistake. Universe Protection Unit. My ship landed here by mistake. Yes, it is a mistake, because the bed is my spot. I need to repair my turbo boosters. Have you discovered crystallic fusion? We got double As. Watch yourself! Halt! Who goes there?! Don't shoot! It's OK. Friends. Do you know these life forms? Yes. They're Andy's toys. Yes. They're Andy's toys. You're clear to come up. I am Buzz Lightyear. I come in peace. Oh, I'm so glad you're not a dinosaur! Thank you. Now, thank you all for your kind welcome. What's that button do? I'll show you. 'Buzz Lightyear to the rescue!' Oh! Woody's got a pull string. It sounds like a car ran over it. Not like this one. It's a quality sound system. Where are you from? Singapore? Hong Kong? No, I'm stationed up in the Gamma Quadrant of Sector Four. As a member of Universe Protection Unit of the Space Ranger Corps, I protect the galaxy from invasion from Evil Emperor Zurg, sworn enemy of the Galactic Alliance! Really? I'm from Playskool. Really? I'm from Playskool. And I'm from Mattel. Well, I'm not really from Mattel. I'm from a smaller company that... I'm from a smaller company that... You'd think they'd never seen a new toy. Sure, he's got more gadgets than a Swiss army knife. BEEPING Be careful. You don't want my laser to go off. Hey, a laser! Hey, a laser! How come YOU don't have a laser? It's a light bulb that blinks. What's with him? Laser envy. Enough! We're all very impressed with Andy's new toy. Enough! We're all very impressed with Andy's new toy. Toy? T-O-Y, toy. I think the word you're searching for is space ranger. The word I'm searching for I can't say in front of pre-school toys. You're getting tense. You're getting tense. Oh, Mr Lightyear, now, I'm curious. What does a space ranger actually do? He's not a space ranger! He doesn't fight evil or shoot lasers or fly! He's not a space ranger! He doesn't fight evil or shoot lasers or fly! Excuse me. THEY GASP THEY GASP Impressive wingspan. Very good. Oh, what? These are plastic. He can't fly. They are a terillium carbonic alloy and I can fly. No, you can't. No, you can't. Yes, I can. You can't. Can. Can't! Can't! I could fly around this room! OK, Mr Light Beer, prove it. All right, then, I will. Stand back, everyone! To infinity... and beyond. Can! THEY CHEER Wow! You flew magnificently. I've found my moving buddy. I've found my moving buddy. Thank you. Thank you all. That wasn't flying, that was falling with style. The dolls must go for that, can you teach me? Golly, Bob Howdy! Oh, shut up! In a couple of days everything will be just like it was. They'll see. I'm still Andy's favourite toy. # I was on top of the world, living high # It was right in my pocket Whoa! # I was living the life # Things were just the way they should be # When from out of the sky like a bomb # Comes some new punk in a rocket BEEPING # All of a sudden, some strange things are happening to me # All of a sudden, some strange things are happening to me Buzz Lightyear to the rescue! # Strange... things are happening to me # Strange...things Rrrah! # Strange... things are happening to me REX ROARS LIKE A DINOSAUR # Ain't no doubt about it # I had friends # Oh, lots of friends # Now all my friends are gone # And I'm doing the best I can to carry on # I had power # I was respected # But not any more # And I've lost the love of the one whom I adore # Let me tell you about it # Strange things are happening to me Ah! # Strange...things # Strange... things are happening to me # Ain't no doubt about it # Strange...things # Strange things... # Oh! Finally! Hey, who's got my hat? Look, I'm Woody. Howdy, howdy, howdy. Ha-ha, ha-ha-ha(!) Give me that. Lizard and Stretchy Dog, let me show you something. I've been accepted into your culture. Your chief, Andy, inscribed his name on me. Wow! With permanent ink too. I must get back to repairing my ship. Don't let it get to you, Woody. Don't let it get to you, Woody. What? I don't... What do you mean? I know Andy's excited about Buzz, but he'll always have a special place for you. Yeah, like the attic! Yeah, like the attic! All right, that's it! Unidirectional bonding strip. Mr Lightyear wants more tape. Listen, Light Snack. You stay away from Andy, he's mine. And no-one is taking him away from me. What are you talking about? Where's that bonding strip? And another thing, stop with this spaceman thing! It's getting on my nerves. You want to lodge a complaint? Oh, OK! Oh, well. So, you want to do it the hard way? Don't even think about it. Don't even think about it. Oh, yeah, tough guy? HE GASPS FOR AIR HE CHOKES HE SNIFFS The air isn't toxic. How dare you open my helmet on an uncharted planet? My eyeballs could've been sucked from their sockets. You actually think you're THE Buzz Lightyear? Oh, all this time I thought it was an act! Hey, guys, look! It's the real Buzz Lightyear(!) You're mocking me. You're mocking me. Oh, no, no. No, no, no. Look! An alien! Look! An alien! Where? WOODY LAUGHS DOG BARKS/ WOODY STOPS LAUGHING Yes! A BOY LAUGHS Whoa! Uh-oh. It's Sid. Don't move! > I thought he was at camp. I thought he was at camp. They kicked him out early. Oh, no, not Sid. Incoming! Incoming! DOG BARKS Who is it is time? I can't tell. Where's Lenny? Here. I can't bear to watch one of these again. Just stay where you are! > Just stay where you are! > Oh, no, it's a Combat Carl. What's going on? Nothing that concerns spacemen. Nothing that concerns spacemen. I'd better take a look anyway. Why is that soldier strapped to an explosive device? Why is that soldier strapped to an explosive device? That's why - Sid. Sure is a hairy fellow. No, no. That's Scud, you idiot. That is Sid. HE LAUGHS MANIACALLY You mean that happy child? That ain't no happy child. That ain't no happy child. He tortures toys, just for fun! Well, we've got to do something. What are you doing? What are you doing? I'm gonna teach him a lesson. Yeah, sure, go ahead. Melt him with your scary laser. Yeah, sure, go ahead. Melt him with your scary laser. Be careful with that. It's extremely dangerous. He's lighting it! Hit the dirt! Look out! BANG! Yes! He's gone! He's history. SID LAUGHS I could've stopped him. Buzz, I would love to see you try. 'Course, I'd love to see you as a crater. The sooner we move, the better. m To infinity and beyond! Oh, all this packing makes me hungry. What would you say to dinner at, oh, Pizza Planet? Pizza Planet? Oh, cool! Go wash your hands, I'll get Molly ready. Can I bring some toys? You can bring one toy. You can bring one toy. Just one? One toy? Will Andy pick me? Will Andy pick me? SLOSHING Don't count on it?! Oh! Yargh! HE HUMS Buzz! Oh! Buzz! Buzz, thank goodness! We've got trouble! Where? Down there! Just there, a helpless toy. It's trapped, Buzz. It's trapped, Buzz. Then, we've no time to lose. ENGINE WHIRRS I don't see it. I don't see it. He's there, keep looking! What kind of toy? HE GASPS Whooooooa! Buzz! Buzz! Buzz! I don't see him in the drive. I think he bounced into Sid's yard. Oh, Buzz! CAR HORN Hey, everyone, RC's trying to say something. What is it, boy? He says that this was no accident. He says that this was no accident. What do you mean? I mean Humpty Dumpty was pushed... by Woody! You don't think I meant to knock Buzz out the window, do you, Potato Head? It's Mr Potato Head to you, you murderer. Now, it was an accident, guys. Come on, now, you gotta believe me. We believe you, Woody. Right, Rex? Yeah, no. I don't like confrontations. Where is your honour? You are a disgrace! You don't deserve... Hey! Couldn't handle Buzz cutting in on you? Didn't like the fact that Buzz might be Andy's favourite toy? So, you got rid of him. What if Andy starts playing with me more? You gonna push me out? You gonna push me out? Don't give him the chance. There he is, men! There he is, men! Let's string him up by his pull string. I got dibs on his hat. I got dibs on his hat. Would you boys stop it? I can explain everything! Andy, come on! Andy, come on! OK. I've just got to get Buzz. Retreat! Do you know where Buzz is? I haven't seen him. Psst! > Andy, I'm heading out the door! I can't find him. I can't find him. Just grab some other toy. Come on! OK. I couldn't find my Buzz. I know I left him there. I'm sure he's around. You'll find him. ENGINE STARTS CHATTERING It's too short. We need more monkeys. There aren't any more! That's the whole barrel. Buzz, the monkeys aren't working! We're formulating another plan. Stay calm! Oh, where could he be? Can I help pump the gas? Can I help pump the gas? Sure! I'll even let you drive... when you're 16. Hyuk, hyuk! Funny, Mom. Oh, great. How am I gonna convince those guys it was an accident? Buzz! Buzz! Ha! You're alive! This is great. Oh! I'm saved! Andy'll find you here. He'll take us back to the room and you can tell everyone that this was all just a big mistake. Huh? Right...? Buddy? Even though you tried to terminate me, revenge is not an idea we promote on my planet. Oh, good. But we're not on my planet. Are we? No. Ooh! STRUGGLING NOISES AND BEEPING Aaaaah! Ouf! OK, come on! You want a piece of me? Argh! 'Buzz Lightyear to the rescue!' Next stop? Next stop? Pizza Planet! Yeah! HE GASPS Andy! Doesn't he realise I'm not there? HE GASPS I'm lost! Oh, I'm a lost toy. WOODY SOBS Buzz Lightyear, mission log. The sheriff and I seem to be at a huge refuelling station. You! TRUCK HORN BLASTS According to my nava-computer... According to my nava-computer... Shut up! Just shut up, you idiot! This is no time to panic. This is no time to panic. It IS the time to panic. I'm lost, Andy is gone, they move house in two days and it's your fault! My fault? You pushed me out the window. You pushed me out the window. Oh, yeah? Well, if you hadn't taken away everything that was important to me. Because of you, the security of the entire universe is in jeopardy. Because of you, the security of the entire universe is in jeopardy. What?! What are you talking about? At the edge of the galaxy, Emperor Zurg is building a weapon with the capacity to annihilate a planet. I alone have information about this weapon's weakness. YOU are responsible for delaying my rendezvous with Star Command! YOU...ARE...A...TOY! You aren't the real Buzz Lightyear, you're an action figure! You are a child's plaything! You are a sad, strange little man and you have my pity. Farewell. Oh, yeah? Well, good riddance, you loony! Rendezvous with Star Command(!) < Hey! Gas, dude! Pizza Planet? Andy! Oh, no. I can't show my face in that room without Buzz. Buzz! Buzz, come back! Buzz! Buzz, come back! Go away. No, you gotta come back, I... I found a spaceship! It's a spaceship, Buzz. < Come on, man, hurry up. The pizzas are getting cold. < Cutting Boulevard? < Cutting Boulevard? < Yeah. Which way? You're sure this space freighter will return to its port of origin? You're sure this space freighter will return to its port of origin? Uh-huh. And when we get there, we can find a way to transport you home. Let's climb aboard. Let's climb aboard. No, no, wait! Buzz, Buzz! Let's get in the back. Let's get in the back. No, there are no restraining harnesses in the cargo area. We'll be safer in the cockpit. Buzz! Buzz! Buzz! Buzz! Two lefts and a right, huh? Thanks for the directions. Yeah. Buzz! ENGINE STARTS Argh! m It's safer in the cockpit. What an idiot! Argh! Oof! Whoa! Argh! TANNOY: 'Next shuttle liftoff scheduled for T minus 30 minutes and counting.' ROBOT VOICE: 'You are clear to enter. Welcome to Pizza Planet.' 'The white zone is...' Sheriff? Sheriff? There you are. The entrance is guarded. We need a way to get inside. Great idea, Woody. I like your thinking. 'You are clear to enter. Welcome to Pizza Planet.' Now! Quickly, the airlock is closing. 'Jones, party of five, your shuttle is now boarding at launch base 12.' Ow! Watch where you're going! Ow! Watch where you're going! Sorry. Ah! 'Ten, nine, eight, seven, six... 'five, four, three, two, one.' What a spaceport. Good work, Woody. ZAPPING Mom, can I play Black Hole? Please! Andy! We need a ship for Sector 12. No, Buzz! This way. I just saw a special ship. I just saw a special ship. You mean it has hyperdrive? Hyperactive hyperdrive. And astro...er, turf. Where is it? I don't see... Where is it? I don't see... Come on. That's it. Spaceship! All right, Buzz, get ready. And... ..the universe explodes. OK, we'll jump in the basket. Buzz! Oh! No! This cannot be happening to me. HE GASPS SQUEAKING A stranger. From the outside. ALL: Ohhh! ALL: Ohhh! Greetings! I am Buzz Lightyear. I come in peace. THEY MURMUR 'Re-energise yourself with a slice of pepperoni, 'now boarding at counter three.' This is an emergency. I need to take your vessel. Who's in charge here? ALL: The claw. The claw chooses who goes and who stays. This is ludicrous. This is ludicrous. Hey, you got a brain in there? Take that! Take that! BEEPING Oh, no! Sid! Get down! COINS CLINK What's got into you? What's got into you? You climbed in here. What's got into you? You climbed in here. Shh! The claw. It moves. SQUEAKING I have been chosen. Farewell, my friends. I go on to a better place. Got you! A Buzz Lightyear? No way! COINS DROP Yes! Buzz! No! Hey! He has been chosen. He must go. What are you doing? Stop it! Stop it, you zealots! All right! Double prizes! Let's go home and play. HE CHUCKLES I can see your dwelling from here. You're almost home. You're almost home. Nirvana is coming. Be quiet! You don't get it, do you? Once we go into Sid's house, we won't come out. DOG BARKS DOG BARKS Whoa, Scud! Hey, boy. Sit! Good boy. I got something for you, boy. Freeze! Ready, set, now! Ready, set, now! SQUEAKING GROWLING Hannah! HEY, HANNAH! What? Did I get my package? I don't know. What do you mean? I don't know. Oh, no, Hannah! Oh, no, Hannah! What? Janie's sick. No, she's not! I'll have to perform one of my operations. No, not Sid's room! No, not Sid's room! Sid, give her back! Sid! Sid! Oh, no. We have a sick patient here, nurse. Prepare the OR, stat! Patient is prepped. No-one's attempted a double-bypass brain transplant before. Now for the tricky part. Pliers. Pliers. He never went to medical school. CREAKING CREAKING Doctor, you've done it! Hannah! Janie's all better now. Hannah! Janie's all better now. SHE SCREAMS Mom! Mom! She's lying! Whatever she says, it's not true! Ah! We are gonna die. I'm outta here! Locked. There's got to be another way out. There's got to be another way out. RUMBLING WHOOSH! Er, Buzz, was that you? CREAKING Hey, hi there, little fellow. Come out. Do you know a way out of here? Come out. Do you know a way out of here? CREAKING HE GASPS CREAKING CLICKING Ah! HE GASPS MUSIC: "Pop Goes The Weasel" Whaargh! B-B-B-B-Buzz! They're cannibals. They're cannibals. Ah! Mayday! Mayday! Come in, Star Command! Send reinforcements. Star Command, do you copy? I've set my laser from stun to kill. Great(!) If anyone attacks us, we can blink 'em to death. RUSTLING Hey, guys, I think I found him. Buzz, is that you? MIAOW! Whiskers, get out of here? You're interfering with the search and rescue! HE GASPS Look, they're home. Mom, have you seen Woody? Where did you leave him? Right here in the van. You're not looking hard enough. He's not here, Mom. Woody's gone. SHE GASPS Woody's gone? Yeah, boy, the weasel ran away. Huh? I told you he was guilty. Who would've thought he was capable of such atrocities? Oh, Slink, I hope he's OK. Oh, a survivor! Where's the rebel base? Talk! I can see your will is strong. Well, we have ways of making you talk. Where are your rebel friends now? Sid, your Pop Tarts are ready! > Sid, your Pop Tarts are ready! > All right! Aaaargh! HISSING AND BUBBLING I'm proud of you. A lesser man would've talked under such torture. I sure hope this isn't permanent. I sure hope this isn't permanent. Still no word from Star Command. We're not far... The door! It's open! We're free! What's out there? I'll tell you... Ahhh! They're gonna eat us, Buzz! Do something! Do something! Shield your eyes. BEEPING It's not working. I recharged it. It's not working. I recharged it. You idiot, you're a toy! Use your karate chop. Get away! Get away! Hey, how're you doing that? Stop it. Back, you savages! Woody, stop it! Woody, stop it! Sorry, dinner's cancelled. There's no place like home! There's no place like home. Ah! SCUD SNORES Another stunt like that, cowboy, you're gonna get us killed. Another stunt like that, cowboy, you're gonna get us killed. Don't tell me what to do. Sssh! 'Yee-ha! Giddy up, partner! 'We gotta get this wagon train moving!' GROWLING Split up! SCUD GROWLS SNORING TV: 'Come in, Buzz Lightyear. This is Star Command.' Star Command. Star Command. 'Buzz Lightyear responding. Read you loud and clear. 'Earth needs help. On the way! 'Buzz Lightyear, the world's greatest superhero, 'now the world's greatest toy! He has it all! 'Wrist communicator! Buzz Lightyear. 'Karate-chop action! 'Pulsating laser light. 'Voice simulator! 'Voice simulator! 'A secret mission in space. 'A secret mission in space. 'And best of all, high-pressure space wings! 'To infinity and beyond! 'Get your Buzz Lightyear action figure and save a galaxy near you! 'Available at all Al's Toy Barn outlets.' MUSIC: "I Will Go Sailing No More" by Randy Newman # Out among the stars I sit # Way beyond the moon # In my silver ship I sailed # A dream that ended too soon # Now I know exactly # Who I am and what I'm here for WOODY: 'You are a toy! You can't fly!' # And I will go sailing # No more # But, no, it can't be true # I could fly if I wanted to # Like a bird in the sky # If I believed I could fly # Why, I'd fly... To infinity and beyond! # Clearly... # I will go sailing # No more. # Mom! Mom, have you seen my Sally doll? What dear? What was that? Never mind! RATTLING Oh! Ouf! Buzz, the coast is clear. Buzz, where are you? 'A secret mission in space. Let's go.' Really? That is so interesting. Would you like some tea, Mrs Nesbitt? Buzz! It's so nice you could join us on such late notice. Oh, no. Oh, no. What a lovely hat, Mrs Nesbitt. It goes quite well with your head. Hannah?! Oh, Hannah? Mom? Please excuse me, ladies. I'll be right back. What is it, Mom? Mom, where are you? Buzz! Hey, Buzz, are you OK? Gone! It's all gone. All gone. Bye-bye, see ya! What happened to you? One minute you're defending the whole galaxy, and you find yourself drinking Darjeeling with Marie Antoinette and her sister. I think you've had enough tea for today. Let's get you out of here, Buzz. Let's get you out of here, Buzz. Don't you get it?! You see the hat? I'm Mrs Nesbitt. Snap out of it, Buzz! CALMLY: I-I'm sorry. You're right. I'm just a little depressed. I-I can get through this. Oh, I'm a sham! Sssh! Sssh! I can't even fly out of the window. Did the hat look good? Tell me it looked good. The apron is a bit much. The apron is a bit much. Out the window. Buzz, you're a genius! Come on, this way. Years of academy training wasted! B3. Miss. G6. Oh, you sunk it! Are you peeking? Quit your whining and pay up. Not the ear, give me the nose. Quit your whining and pay up. Not the ear, give me the nose. How about three out of five? Hey, guys! Guys! Hey! Woody! In the psycho's bedroom. Hi! It's Woody! It's Woody! You're kidding! We're gonna get out of here, Buzz. Buzz? HE MAKES AIRPLANE NOISES P-P-Pfffft! Woody! Oh, boy, am I glad to see you guys! I knew you'd be back. What are you doing? It's a long story, I'll explain later. Catch this! I got it, Woody. He got it, Woody! Good, now tie it onto something! Wait! How about we don't? Potato Head! Potato Head! Have you forgotten what he did to Buzz? Now you want to let him back over? Now you want to let him back over? No, no, no! You got it all wrong! Buzz is fine. Buzz is right here, he's with me. You are a liar! You are a liar! Buzz come over here. Tell the nice toys that you're not dead. Just a sec. Buzz, will you get up here and give me a hand? Ha-ha! That's very funny, Buzz. This is serious! Woody, where'd you go? Woody, where'd you go? He's lying. Buzz ain't there. Oh, hi! Buzz, why don't you say hello to the guys over there? Hiya, fellas! To infinity and beyond! Hey, look, it's Buzz! Hey, Buzz! Let's show them our secret best friends' handshake. Gimme five, man! Something's screwy here. So you see, we're friends now, aren't we? You bet! Gimme a hug. Boy, I love you, too. See, it is Buzz. Now give back the lights. See, it is Buzz. Now give back the lights. Wait just a minute. What are you trying to pull? Nothing. SCREAMING AND GASPING HE RETCHES HE RETCHES Disgusting! Murderer! No, no, no! You murderer! It's not what you think! It's not what you think! I hope Sid pulls your voice box out! No, no! No, don't leave! You gotta help us, please! Let's get out of here. Let's get out of here. Go back to your lives, citizens. Come back! Slink! Slink, please! Please listen to me! No! No! No, come back! HE SOBS: Sli-i-inky. TINKLING Buzz! Go away, you disgusting freaks! Ahhh! All right, back! Back, you cannibals! Noooo! Ouf! He is still alive, you're not gonna get him! No, you don't! Hey. Hey, they fixed you. B-B-But they're cannibals. We saw them eat those other toys. QUACK! Er, sorry. I-I-I thought that you were gonna, you know, eat my friend. Hey, no, no. Wait! Hey! What's wrong? < Sid! Not now, Mom, I'm busy! Not now, Mom, I'm busy! Sid! Buzz, come on get up! And use your legs. Fine, let Sid trash you! But don't blame me! It came! It finally came! The Big One. "Extremely dangerous. "Keep out of reach of children." Cool! What am I gonna blow? Man! Hey, where's that wimpy cowboy doll? BEEPING Yes. I've always wanted to put a spaceman into orbit. HE CHUCKLES Yes. THUNDER THUNDER Oh, no! Ah, man! Sid Phillips reporting. Launch of the shuttle has been delayed due to adverse weather conditions. Tomorrow's forecast - sunny. Sweet dreams. I looked everywhere, honey, but all I could find was your hat. But what if we leave them behind? But what if we leave them behind? Don't worry, honey. I'm sure we'll find Woody and Buzz before we leave tomorrow. I need air! Will you quit moving around? Will you quit moving around? I'm sorry. It's just, I get so nervous before I travel. How did I get stuck with you as a moving buddy? How did I get stuck with you as a moving buddy? Everyone else was picked. Oh, Woody. If only you could see how much Andy misses you. THUNDER HE SNORES HE GROANS Psst! Pst! Buzz! Hey! Get over here and see if you can get this toolbox off me. Oh, come on, Buzz, I... Buzz, I can't do this without you. I need your help. I can't help. I can't help anyone. I can't help anyone. What? Sure you can. I'll get that rocket off you and we'll make a break for Andy's house. Andy's or Sid's, what's the difference? You've had a big fall, you must not be thinking clearly. No, for the first time I am thinking clearly. You were right all along. I'm not a space ranger, I'm just a toy. A stupid insignificant toy. Whoa! Being a toy is a lot better than being a space ranger. Yeah, right(!) No, it is. That kid thinks you are the greatest. And it's not because you're a space ranger, pal, it's because you're a toy. You are his toy. But why would Andy want me? Why would Andy want you? Look at you! You're a Buzz Lightyear! Any other toy would give up his moving parts just to be you. You've got wings, you glow in the dark, you talk! Your helmet does that... that whoosh thing. You are a cool toy! As a matter of fact, you're too cool. What chance does a toy like me have against a Buzz Lightyear action figure? All I can do is... 'There's a snake in my boots.' Why would Andy ever wanna play with me when he's got you? I'm the one that should be strapped to that rocket. Listen, Buzz, forget about me. You should get out of here while you can. SCRAPING Buzz! What're you doing? There's a kid in that house who needs us. Now, let's get you out. Yes, sir! Come on, Buzz, we can do it! HE GROANS Woody, it's the moving van. We gotta get outta here now. THEY GROAN Come on. All right. Buzz! Hey, I'm out! Almost there. I want to ride the pony. HE SNORES Whew! Woody! Woody, are you all right? Woody! Woody, are you all right? RATTLING Oh, I'm fine. I'm OK. ALARM RINGS Oh, yeah! Time for liftoff. Whoo-hoo! To infinity and beyooooond! Whoo-hoo! SCUD GROWLS Ah! Ah! Back! Back! Down, down! IT BARKS OK, what do I do? Come on, think. TINKLING Guys! No, no, no, wait! Listen, there's a good toy down there. And he's gonna be blown to bits, all because of me. We gotta save him. B-But I need your help. SQUEAKING Please. He's my friend. And he's the only one I've got. IT TAPS QUACKING Thank you. OK, I think I know what to do. We're going to have to break a few rules, but if it works, it'll help everybody. Houston to Mission Control. Come in, Control. Launch pad is being constructed. Listen up. I need Pump Boy here, Ducky here. Legs? You're with Ducky. Rollerbob and I don't move till we get the signal. Clear? OK, let's move! IT BARKS BARKING IT QUACKS Wind the frog. GROWLING Wait for the signal. BELL RINGS Go! All right, let's go. I'll get it. Now! I'm coming, I'm coming. I'm coming, I'm coming. BARKING Oh! Scud! SCUD BARKS Stupid dog! Lean back! Control, is the launch pad construction complete? Roger. BANGING We are currently obtaining the ignition sticks. Stand by. Let's go. Mom, where are the matches? Oh, never mind! Woody, help me out of this. Shh! What? It's OK. Everything's under control. Woody, what're you doing? Houston? All systems are go. Requesting permission to launch. Hey, how'd you get out here? Oh well. You and I can have a cookout later. Houston, do we have permission to launch? Roger, permission granted. You are confirmed at T minus 10 seconds. And counting. 10, nine, eight, seven... six, five, four... three, two, one! 'Reach for the sky.' Huh? 'This town ain't big enough for the two of us.' What? 'Somebody's poisoned the water hole!' It's busted. It's busted. 'Who are you calling busted, buster? That's right. 'I'm talking to you, Sid Phillips.' Huh? Huh? 'We don't like being blown up or ripped apart.' We? We? 'That's right, your toys.' Mama! Mama! Mama! Mama! HE GASPS SQUEAKING CROAKING HE SCREAMS Ah! Mama! 'From now on, you must take good care of your toys 'because if you don't, we'll find out, Sid. 'We toys can see everything.' So play nice. HE SCREAMS Ha-ha! We did it! We did it! Yes! The toys! The toys are alive! Nice dolly. Aaaaah! What's wrong, Sid? Don't you want to play with Sally? Nice work, fellas. Good job. Coming out of the ground was a stroke of genius. Woody. Thanks. CAR HORN BEEPS Everybody say, "Bye, house!" Everybody say, "Bye, house!" Woody, the van! We gotta run. Thanks, guys! ENGINE STARTS Quick! Quick! Hey! I'll catch up! LORRY ENGINE BOTH: Ah! Come on! IT GROWLS You can do it! I got it. I made it. I got it. I made it. BARKING Ahhhhh! Get away, you stupid dog! Down! Down! Hold on, Woody! I can't do it! Take care of Andy for me! No! SCUD YELPS Buzz! SCUD GROWLS SCUD GROWLS AND BARKS Are we there already? Are we there already? Woody! How did you get here? What happened? What's going on? What's going on? What's he taking? A-ha! There you are! What's he doing? Ahhh! He's at it again! HORN BEEPS Ha-ha-ha! Get him! Ah! Ah! No! No! No, no! Wait! Whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Pig pile! Ahhhhh! CAR HORNS BEEP/ PEOPLE SHOUT HE SIGHS No! Wait! Buzz is out there! We gotta help him! Toss him overboard! No, no, no, wait!! Ah! Hooray! So long, Woody! Oh! Ohhhhh! Woody! Oh! Well, thanks for the ride. Look o-o-out! Now let's catch up to that truck. CHEERING AND LAUGHTER Guys! Guys, Woody's riding RC and Buzz is with him! What? It is Buzz! Woody was telling the truth! What have we done? What have we done? Great! Now I have guilt. We're almost there! Rocky, the ramp! Rocky, the ramp! HE GRUNTS Look out! Quick, hold onto my tail! That a boy, Slink! Oh, Woody! Woody, speed up! Speed up! The batteries, they're running out. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Aaahh! STEREO:: # Hakuna Matata # What a wonderful phrase. # Aaaaaah! I can't hold on much longer. I can't hold on much longer. Slink, hang on! Aaaahhh! Ouch! Great! Woody, the rocket! Woody, the rocket! The match! Yes! Thank you, Sid. No! No, no! No! HE SOBS: Noooo! Oh, nooooo. No, no, no. No, no, no, no. No! Woody, what are you doing? Hold still, Buzz. Ha-ha! You did it! Next stop Andy! Next stop Andy! Wait a minute. I just lit a rocket. Rockets explode! I should've held on longer. Look! It's Woody and Buzz coming up fast! Woody! Take cover! This is the part where we blow up! Not today. Ahhh! Hey, Buzz, you're flying! This isn't flying. This is falling with style. Ha-ha-ha! To infinity and beyond! Er...Buzz? We missed the truck. We missed the truck. We're not aiming for the truck. Hey, wow! What? What is it? Woody! Buzz! You found them. Where were they? You found them. Where were they? Here in the car! See? What'd I tell you? Right where you left them. SLEIGH BELLS Which one can I open first? Which one can I open first? Let's let Molly open one. 'Frankincense, come in.' Heads up! It's show time! It's show time! Oh, it's time! Ah! There must be a less painful way to get my attention. Merry Christmas, Sheriff. Say, isn't that mistletoe? Uh-huh. Maybe Andy'll get another dinosaur. Like a leaf-eater and I can play the dominant predator. Quiet! 'Molly's first present is... 'Mrs Potato Head. Repeat, a Mrs Potato Head.' Way to go, Idaho! Way to go, Idaho! Gee, I'd better shave. 'Come in, Frankincense. 'Andy is now opening his first present.' 'It's...' CRACKLING Buzz Lightyear, you are not worried, are you? Buzz Lightyear, you are not worried, are you? Me? No, no. No, no, no, no, no. 'It's a large box. It's, it's...' Are you? Now, Buzz, what could Andy possibly get that is worse than you? Oh, what is it? What is it? BARKING Wow, a puppy! Ha!