1 (DYNAMIC MUSIC) I am the police, and I'm here to arrest you. You've broken the law. I did not write the law, I may even disagree with the law, but I will enforce it. No matter how you plead, cajole, beg or attempt to stir my sympathies, nothing you do will stop me from placing you in a steel cage with grey bars. If you run away, I will chase you. If you fight me, I will fight back. If you shoot at me, I will shoot back. By law, I am unable to walk away. I'm a consequence. I'm the unpaid bill. I am fate with a badge and a gun. Behind my badge is a heart like yours. I bleed, I think, I love. And yes, I can be killed. And although I am but one man, I have thousands of brothers and sisters who are the same as me. They will lay down their lives for me, and I them. We stand watch together ` a thin blue line protecting the prey from the predators, the good from the bad. We are the police. (SIREN WAILS) (TYRES SCREECH) DISPATCH: 13-X-ray-39 is in pursuit of a Code 37 vehicle west on... Go ahead, motherfucker. Try to run, try to run, you son of a bitch. on, hold on, hold on. Eastbound through the alley at 20-hundred block from Cooper. DISPATCHER: Eastbound through the alley at 20-hundred block from Cooper. Oh, shit! Come around, come around, dude, come around. Come around. Move, move, move. Get the fuck around, dude. (OVER SPEAKER): Pull to the right. Pull to the right. Bro, he's not gonna pull to the right. You stupid motherfucker! Man, he almost lost it. Hit him, man. Hit him, hit him! - (TYRES SCREECH) - Got him! (GUNFIRE) Fuck you! (SHELLS CLINK ON GROUND) (DOGS BARK IN DISTANCE) - You good?! - Good, good, good! This fucker's down. I'm gonna hook 'em. (DOGS BARK) (SIRENS APPROACHING) (HELICOPTER APPROACHING) (INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER) (TYRES SCREECH) Holy shit. (BANGS LOCKERS) All right, this is my day job. Uh, some of you ` Sorry, bro, I'm recording. This is my day job. Uh, some of you might know me as Brian, or, uh, Taylor. But here, I am Police Officer Two Brian Taylor. This is where the forces of good prepare to fight the... forces of evil. This is my partner, Officer Zavala. - I'm in my chones, dude. - I know, dude. Come on. - I'm in my chones. No, no, no, no. - Come on, man. - I'm good, bro. - We work precinct patrol here at Newton, one of the toughest divisions in the LAPD. Shootin' Newton, baby, that's right. Lucky 13. This is the department-issue sidearm. Glock 19. Spyderco tactical knife. And this little thing can break windows here. (CHUCKLES) Two Smith & Wesson handcuffs. Can of OC spray. Pepper spray. Two extra mags. What else? That's my name tag here. Um, you can see my partner's dirty locker. Yours is like a woman. Look at this. What is this, Pottery Barn? Hey, are you gonna shut the fuck up and get ready for roll call? Dude, don't swear, man. I have to edit that out when you swear. Oh, fuck. Oh, shit, dude. Fuck, man. Sh` OK, now in Spanish. (CURSES IN SPANISH) Oh, hey. You kids having fun? Oh, look, it's Officer Van Hauser. Officer Three Van Hauser. Considered unpromotable by the department. (WHISPERS): And the angriest fucking cop in the world. (SNICKERS) - Taylor, I'm gonna tell Sarge that you're taping in here. - What'd you say? I'm gonna tell Sarge that you're taping in here. Oh. Yeah. Well, it's not really called taping any more. It uses flash cards, but it's not really a... Don't worry about it. - What? It's OK. - Goddamn it. Pull up, pull up. - Like that. - Mm-hmm. So am I recording you? Yes, dude, and I'm recording you. Oh, that's so cool, man. See that thing there? - Yeah. - That is the lens right there. It's just like that on that, this right here. - Hey, guys, quiet down! - (PEOPLE CHATTER) It's not me. There's no woman in her life... All right, let's settle down, let's settle down. Captain is here. He'd like to say a few words. Let's quiet down. Thank you, Sergeant. Good afternoon. - Good afternoon. - Put it down. I'd like to welcome back Zavala and Taylor. DA cleared these guys in last month's shooting. a good shooting. I know first-hand what you guys went through. It's an unpleasant experience being under that much scrutiny. But you need to remember something. An on-the-job shooting is still considered a homicide. It's never an easy ride. If you do the right thing, I will always have your back. Do the wrong thing and cross me, I will personally throw you under the bus. - Am I clear? - ALL: Yes, sir. - Taylor, am I clear? - Yes, sir. - Sergeant, am I clear? - Yes, sir. - Have a nice day. - Thank you, Captain. - That shit smells like ass. - Hey, hey, hey. Quiet down! See this? It's a ticket book. Inside are things called tickets. - Son of a bitch! - Hmm. You can do things like stop motorists and cut citations for speeding or going through a light. You all need to write. Sir, we cut citations every watch. I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to these two idiots. - My partner has a question. - Yes? I don't really know how to write. (SIGHS) Uh, but I do sign and draw pictures. Seriously, you don't start writing, Captain's gonna shit on my head, and in turn, I'm gonna shit on your head. - Hmm. - Mm-hmm. And I promise you, you guys are gonna be separated. - Do it, Sarge. - Orozco and Davis ` X25. Peterson and Washington ` X41. Zavala and Taylor, you got X13. William and Cho ` X8. Almeida and Greene ` X21. Van Hauser and Sook ` X4. TAYLOR: Yeah, Sarge? That's not our area. - That's not your area? - No, we work 9. - Oh, I'm sorry, fellas. - You know that, Sarge. Oh, no, you're right. You're on X13. Sorry, fellas, this isn't Monopoly. You don't get to choose your real estate. Now go. Get out. (OFFICERS CHATTER) - Zavala, try not to, uh, kill anybody before the end of the watch. - Really, Sarge? Sarge, if we kill someone in X13, can we go back to X9? VAN HAUSER: Today is a brand-new day. Get the shop, gas the shop, wash the shop. Make sure day watch didn't leave behind any surprises for us. Look for guns, drugs, puke. - Pay attention, boot. - Bye! - Hurry up! - Yes, sir. How you doing, Van Hauser? Warned you about that shit. Where you running with that piece, boot? What? Why you so scared? - Go, go, go. Jesus Christ. - Go on, man. Shit! It's like it's day one. - Boot, slow down with that piece. - Slow down! Orozco, have you been working out? Yeah, with your mom. Why are you shooting everything? It's for his class. I thought you were studying law. Pre-law. I need an art elective. I'm taking filmmaking. Well, get my good side, eh? You don't have a good side. Listen, you know they can subpoena that shit if something goes sideways, right? - Think twice. - Two words ` erase button! Two words - just cos you guys think you're these big ghetto gunfighters now don't mean you can be dropping your calls. That was at least two dozen words. Yeah, well, I barely got a GED, so what do you expect, white boy? Unbelievable. Saddle up, ladies. We're sick of holding up your end. ZAVALA: Admit it, you'd hit that shit. - What, Orozco? - Yeah. With a cinder block. Check the roof, boot. Where's your shop? I got Red Bull, Monster and, uh... They all say 13. Check the roofs. - Thank you, ma'am. - Faster, boot, let's go. - Get in the car! - Yes, sir. - Then I got you some Kombucha cos I know you like that stuff. - Fuck that shit! - (LAUGHS) - What is that? # Rolling Stones of the rap game, not bragging. # Lips bigger than Jagger, not sagging. # Spell it backwards, I'm 'a leave it at that. # That ain't got nothing to do with rap. # Check the facts, expose those cats # who pose as heroes, take advantage of blacks. # Your government's gangster, so cut the crap. # A war going on, so where y'all at?. # Fight the power comes great responsibility. # Eff the police, but who's stopping you from killing me? # Disasters, fiascos over a loop by PE. # If it's 'I' instead of 'we,' believing TV. # Spitting riches, bitches, this new thing about snitches. # Watch them asses move as the masses switches. # System dissed them but barely missed her. # My sole intention to save my brothers and sisters. # Hard, get up # Just like that. # Hard, get up # Just like that. # Hard, get up # Just like that. # Hard, get up # Just like that. # Dude, it's good to be back, man. Old lady was driving me crazy at the casa, like, making me do shit. Oh, no. She dared to ask for your help around the house (?) That's incredible. Outrageous (!) Hey, just cos I look like the dudes from Home Depot doesn't mean I do the shit the Home Depot dudes do. I would never profile you as a man who helped his wife with chores. Shut up. Dude, I'm your homey, OK? I would never, ever do that. (SNICKERS) - Oh, bro. - Hmm? Her brother was always coming over during the day to swim. Every day. I hate everything about him. He smells like weed sometimes. Like he's got, like, a prescription. And Gabi's like, 'No, it's all good.' I was like, 'Whatever. Get him the hell out of here.' I swear to God, I'm filling in that pool with cement. Not personally, cos you'll hire a Home Depot dude for that task. Fuck you. (RADIO BEEPS) DISPATCHER: 13, X13, a 4-15 man at 9742 Maple. Code two incident, 4562. Already 13-13. 13 X-ray-13, Roger. Show us en route. - X13, Roger. - First customer of the day. I hope they enjoy our police service. (LAUGHS) # So it's time to leave you a preview. # So you, too, can review what we do. # 20 years in this business, how you sell soul... # - Suck my dick! That motherfucker's a lying-ass bitch. - Yo, yo! - Fuck him! Fuck you, too! - Hey, hey, hey. Shut your fucking` You touch me, I will fucking shoot you. You stay where you are. I don't give a fuck about both of you motherfuckers. I'm ready to die today. - Fuck y'all. - This can go one of several ways right now. It is all about your attitude. Fuck you. I got my mail! I helped him! I helped him give me my mail! Now I'm getting tired of this shit. - All right. - I'm not playing with y'all. Sir, if you've been drinking, you need to stay the fuck inside and not intimidate the mailman. - That's it. - Fuck you! You need to shut the fuck up! Cos without that badge and gun, you ain't shit! - Yeah? - You're less than motherfucking nothing! - You motherfucking border-hopping, donkey-riding Mexican motherfucker! - Whoa, whoa, whoa. - Is that so? You want to find out what I'm about? - Show me! - Fuck. - Let's settle this right here like grown men, motherfucker! - Not again, man. - What you say? You want to take a fade? - You want to fight me? - Yeah, I want to fight you. Let's go, bro. I whup your punk ass, you gonna get the fuck up out my crib? Hell, no! But you called me out, bro. Now I'm calling you out. What's up? You whup my ass, I'll put them motherfucking handcuffs on my motherfucking self. That's on the set. - Door. - It's gonna be a pleasure beating your bitch ass. - It's my fucking fantasy. - Talking, kid. You don't know who the fuck you think you fucking with. I love this shit, to beat a motherfucking punk-ass police ass like yours. - Keep talking, bro. - Get this shit popping, motherfucker. (BOTH GRUNT) Oh, shit. This shit's crazy. Fucking kick his ass. Come on, come on, Z! - Fucking...! - Z! Yo, Z, Z, Z, Z. Now get the fuck up. You like that? Ain't no wrestling match. You all right, you all right, you all right? You all right? Come on. (BOTH PANT) Oh, shit! (BOTH GRUNT) Come on, man! That's what happens when you fuck with the police. (GROANING, YELLING) Yeah, come on. Take him, take him, take him, take him, take him. Fuck you! Border-hopping motherfucker! - Fuck! - Whew. (PANTING) Yeah, you fucker. Fuckin' did this shit. Fuckin' put him on the fuckin' ground. You all right? Give me those. (PANTS) # Hey, love. # Hey, love... # Take off that frown. # You're in love. # Whassup, putos? It's big bad Ricky from the Curbside Gang Locos. - You ready for this shit? - Fuck yeah. I was born to fucking do this shit. - Right? - Show these motherfuckers whose barrio this is. Don't turn the light, stupid. You're gonna get us pulled over, La. Fuck that shit. I got to fucking be at work. You better not bust out wasting my motherfucking time, homey. I'm 'a tell you that shit right now. Hey, La La, when you gonna fuck the homeboy? - I'm not fucking the homeboy, dawg. - Yeah, right. Shit. What I look like, the little fucking paisa hoochies you guys fucking kick it with? What you packing, baby? I'm packing a motherfucking 30-round clip for these slob-ass niggas. - This is it right here, man. - Slow down. - This is the street, La. - This is it, this is it. All right, Wicked, you're gonna jump and get the party started. Got it? - I got you, baby. I got you. - Listen to the homey. All right, put your fucking face on. Let's go. - Get your shit ready. - Fucking puto. Now put that fucking shit away, man! Make sure your fucking shit is good to go. What the fuck do I got to fucking tell you, man?! I don't want to fucking have to baby you, man! Get ready, holmes, get ready. - Put your fucking face on! - All right, man. Fuck. - You guys ready? - I'm ready, I'm ready. - All right. - (RAP MUSIC PLAYS) - On some real shit, dawg, I'm-a have to holla at you, B. Niggas keep on talking about you got your ass whupped by a motherfucking little punk-ass one time. Nah, blood, these niggas is hating. Let me tell you something. Me and the cop got down, right? The motherfucker took off his badge, dropped his gun. I mean, he kept it gangsta. We straight-up squabbled, head up. They still took you to the bounty though, huh? Yeah, but for disorderly conduct. Not for squabbling with the police, you feel me? Blood, you fought a cop and they didn't put no assaulting a peace officer on you? Listen to me, my nigga. I'm trying to tell y'all. They really showed me love, to keep it G. I'm a two-time felon, right? Y'all know that, right? Could've struck me out and gave me life for fighting that cop, you feel me? I got right out. It wasn't shit. All right, but we heard you got your ass beat, blood. Blood, you better shut the fuck up, CK. I'll run this fucking fork up in your ass, I swear to God. Let me tell you something. Win, lose or draw ` long as you squabble and get down, that's gangsta. - You understand what I'm saying? - Yeah. I mean, that Mexican cop might be acting bull with you, Tre, but he's still out there killing niggas. - Straight out. - No, no, no, no, no. Listen to me, all y'all. This whole fucking thing is like changing of the guard. Back in the day, all these neighbourhoods used to be black. And what are they now? - Mexicans. - Exactly. Used to be chicken stands on the corner, now they're fucking taco stands on every corner. On some real shit, if we don't come together, we're gonna be some extinct niggas pretty soon. (SHOUTING) (SCREAMING, SHOUTING) - Go, go, go, go! - (SHOUTING, WHOOPING) - (TYRES SCREECH) - Damn! - Shit! - Goddamn! - Fucker! Get CK, blood! - Bloods done got the homey. - Get CK! Fuck! - (TYRES SCREECH) - Ah! - Fuck yeah! We got those putos! We got them! - Yeah! - Real shit, motherfuckers! - Fuck. - Fucking lit them up, dawg. Show them putos whose neighbourhood this fucker is. Shit. Fucking proud of you, man. That's what I'm fucking telling you. Good, good. That was fucking good, man. That's what I'm fucking telling you. Fucking proud of you. Fucking did it, man. That's what I'm fucking talking about, man. I'm fucking proud of you, man. I'm fucking proud of you, man. You're a fucking man. Right? - Right, homey. - Right? - Right. - All right, then. All right, then. No fucking fear, man. No fucking fear. That's how we fucking do it, man. That's how we fucking do it, man. Call the motherfucking ambulance, blood! They got TK! Somebody call the fucking ambulance! - Hold on, dawg. Hold on. - Them bitch-ass sewer rats was Curbside! They served us, blood. Curbside just served us. Curbside's banging all over the corner. Look. Peanut, you got that chopper, blood? Let's go hit these punk assholes. 2 So, this is what we believe to be the Code 37 vehicle used in the drive-by last night. Curbside Gang's at it again, bro. Fits the description, it comes back as stolen. Curbside likes these vehicles because they blend in, you can put a lot of people in them. This door slides back, and the gang members open fire. The victim was a male black from a Blood set basically been at war with this Hispanic gang over control of narcotic sales. - Partner. - Yeah. - What up? - Check this out. Oh, shit. Those are shell casings. Detectives told us that three different weapons were used, and we're seeing at least two kinds of shells, so... - Shit. - (CLEARS THROAT) - What's up? Those are the homicide detectives working the case. - What the hell is this? - What? - Candid Camera? - Uh, no, sir. It's just a project I'm working on. - Yeah? - Yeah. - Well, I don't want to see that. - There are .45 and 9mm shell casings inside. How do you know that? - Did you touch them? - No, sir. - Did you fuck up my vehicle? - No, sir. Sir, sir, we found it, we called you. Well, the big dogs are here now, so set up some yellow tape and stay on the other side of it. Dude, it's been two hours. We're still waiting for the detectives to release the scene so we can go back on patrol. Comfortable footwear. Policing's all about comfortable footwear. Officer Van Hauser, good evening. Sarge said I should relieve you guys. You can go back to being the street gods that you are. I'm down with that. Hey, hey! On the street. Watch the street. Make sure no assholes come up here and kill us. Yes, sir. Fucking Christ. Officer Van Hauser. Have you made a difference today? You know, I see you guys out here. You're being good little company men, aren't you? You're doing the Lord's work. You're making a difference, as you call it. It's all fun and games to you. You get to run and jump and fight and shoot. One day ` mark my words ` one day, the LAPD is going to bend you over your black-and-white and they are going to fuck you up the ass. They are going to fuck you so long and so hard you're going to want to eat your gun just to make it stop, and if... if you don't eat your gun and the fucking somehow magically stops, they're going to give you freeway therapy. You're going to end up doing west-end Valley day watch, spending two hours every day on the fucking freeway just thinking about the fucking that they gave you. Bad guys attack from up front. Department comes in from the rear. Watch your six. ZAVALA: I'm ready. This may say 'Purell,' but it's really K-Y. Officer Zavala. That's funny. You kids have fun out there. The LAPD's got a big fucking cock. You got a big heart. TAYLOR: Thank you for sharing that. Can't wait to get it up the ass. Dude, are you going to hook up with a Mexican girl? Quit trying to hook me up with one, dude. - Dude, it'd be great if you did, man. - I get it, man. Shit. Sweet brown sugar. You should marry one of my cousins. If they're anything like you, I wouldn't be able to stand a fucking hour with them. (LAUGHS) Waking up in the morning, they'll be like, 'Hey, can I tell you a story?' - I know. - 'Here's a story about this and a story about that.' But, dude, all you got to do is ` 'Uh-huh, uh-huh. Yeah, uh-huh, yeah.' 'You want to come to my cousin's quinceanera? 'My daughter's quinceanera? My brother's quinceanera?' Yeah. - 'My sister's quinceanera?' - There's always something happening, though, bro. It's better than, like, 'Hey, do you know the new kind of flavoured coffee I have? - Oh, really? - 'Do you like this kind of coffee?' - Shut the fuck up. - 'The baristas are excellent.' You like fucking coffee, dude. Don't give me that shit. I like fucking good Starbucks coffee. Whatever. I'll let you lay into me. Lay into me, dude. Fine. - (RADIO BEEPS) - DISPATCH: 13, X13, missing juveniles. 2717 Jefferson. Code ten for the 5755 and a 1327. TAYLOR: 13 X-ray-13. We're gonna be code six on the missing juvenile. (BANGING ON DOOR) Can't see dick. Hi. Yeah, we got a call about some missing children. Yes, yes, my babies are gone. - I... - My babies are gone. Let us in, we can talk. We can have a conversation about this, all right? Oh, OK. OK. Yeah, my babies are gone. They've been missing all night, and I've been here... Ma'am, why don't you step over here for a second, OK? Just step over here for a second. - Sir, let me see your hands. - How many children are missing? Oh, oh, two, two, two, two. A-A-A boy and a girl. Ma'am, what are the ages of the children that are missing? - One is... one is... one is 1... - All right. - ...and the other be 3. - Sir! - WOMAN: But somebody took them. Let me see your hands, please. Let me see your hands. - All right, OK, OK, ma'am, how... - Put your hands behind your head. - All right, all right! Hands behind your head! Listen, man, Officer, we're good here. Listen, don't say anything to them, man. Don't say... - What did you say? - TAYLOR: I'm going to check the house, OK? Listen to me, Officer. Please listen to me. I'm trying to tell you... - The kids are with their grandma. - Sit the fuck down! - WOMAN: I've been looking. - TAYLOR: I understand. I'm gonna check the house. Sometimes children can hide. They can hide under a bed or in a closet, OK? You can talk to my partner. You're wasting time. The kids are not here. - Ma'am! - If you can please go outside and get my kids right now. You're wasting time! Stop, don't push me! - My babies are missing! - Sit down. Sit... MAN: Officer, let me see some type of warrant. ZAVALA: We don't need a warrant. She let us in. MAN: Why the fuck did you say they could come in, huh? Why the fuck did you say they could come in? - MAN: Officer, can I get a - cigarette? - ZAVALA: Not right now, brother. Hey, I'm trying to tell you, man, the kids are with their grandma, man, OK? I heard you. They're with their grandma. Would you please listen to me, Officer? Officer, let me see some type of warrant, man. Why the hell did you let them in here? Listen to me, you fucking bitch. I will kill you! I will kill you, motherfucker! Get the fuck off of me! What the fuck's happening? - Wait a minute! Wait a minute! - Do you hear what I said to you? You just let me know how clear I have to make myself to you! Why don't you open your fucking mouth and tell me how clear I have to make myself to you! Partner, partner, get off him. Brian, what's up? You OK, partner? What's happening, Brian? MAN: You dumbass smoking bitch! Huh? Go ahead! - I found the kids. - MAN: Go ahead, you fucking crackhead! (CRYING) OK. Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. It's OK. It's OK. You're OK now. You're OK. Shh, shh, shh. - Oh, shit. - (CRYING) Shh. It's OK. It's OK, sweetie. All right. Stay still. All right, you're OK now. You're OK. (BABY CRIES LOUDLY) Hey, come here. You OK? OK, you gonna take care of your sister? (SIGHS) Fucking kids. (LIVELY BLUES MUSIC) (PANTS) - (CHUCKLES) - ZAVALA: It's so funny. (LAUGHS) It's so funny to text. Who you texting? That same bitch? Dude, yeah. She's smart, man. She's, like, the first girl I can actually have a conversation with. You know, she has a Master of Sciences in fluid hydraulics. - Fluid hydraulics? - Yes. I wouldn't brag about that, dude ` that she has a Master's degree in fluid hydraulics. I date all these girls, man. They're smokin' hot. Yeah, your little fucking badge bunnies. I get laid without a badge, thank you very much. Cos you were in the Marines. Don't ask, don't tell. There's a pattern ` an MO here. First date is dinner and a respectful kiss. Second date is dinner, full carnal knowledge. And the third date's dinner and uncomfortable silences when I try and discuss anything of merit. Then it's two or three booty calls, and it's on to the next. OK. I went to prom, and I got married a week later, and I ain't tapped anybody but Old Faithful for, like, eight years, so... I don't know what you're tripping about, dude. OK, will you look at me real quick? - Uh-huh. - OK. Ready? OK. I want somebody to talk to, not just sleep with. Do you fucking understand what I'm saying? Oh, yeah. Jesus, dude. White people get hung up on this fucking soul mate bullshit. Just hook up with a chick that can cook and wants kids, some bitch that's down for you, that won't fuck your friends, and you're straight. Dude, you're the smartest motherfucker I know. You're not going to find some chick that's as smart as you. Ooh. (CHUCKLES) Really, dude? - Yeah. What? - Really? I'm sorry that the perfect girl wasn't dropped in front of me when I was 18 years old. Do you talk to Gabi? Do you even have discussions with the girl? Do you want me to translate that into fucking His... Spanish? Into Hispanic? Whatever the fuck it is. Yeah, bro. What do you think, we're mutes and we just... (MUMBLES) ...like, sign to each other? Yeah, we talk, stupid. Gabi's a trip. You know she's a trip, bro. You should hear the shit that comes out of her mouth. You know what, she would be great on Jeopardy! - She's way smarter than I am. - All right. So you see what I'm talking about. That's all I want, man. I know you want a chick like my girl, but I'll kill you if you touch her. Aah! Fuck, I'm gonna kill you, dude. Shut up, man. (SIGHS) What's this chick's name, dude? You don't deserve to fucking know her name. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Dude! Fuck that. Janet. - Did you run her? - Yes. She's clean. She's kind of the complete package, man. It's like... (INHALES DEEPLY) - We're going out again. - Well, Saturday's my little sister's quinceanera. You should roll through with Janet from another planet. Dude, this shit's going to be hard-core Mexican, though, bro. You know how my familia rolls. (LAUGHS (DANCE MUSIC PLAYS) Hey. Mija. - What's up? - Come here, baby girl. To Jim Jones, baby. Come on. Hey, baby, tell me something. - You ever fucked on heroin? - Yeah, right. I can fuck forever on that shit. - Ew. - I want your pussy... - Ew. - Get the fuck over here. Fuck that fool. He's crazy. He's trippin'. You're my fucking lady. Don't buy his shit. You see this shit right here? This fucking money ` it's real shit. What would you like? Que quieres, mami? Now come here, OK? 3 DISPATCH: ...12-07 party. 3645 Trinity Street. Incident 38-90 and already 13-76. (INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER CONTINUES) - X13, we're gonna be code six on the party call. - DISPATCH: X13, roger. (DANCE MUSIC PLAYS IN DISTANCE) Yo, put that shit away. Put that down, bro. What's the occasion? Can you, uh, turn down the music? (MUSIC STOPS) Have some respect, La La. Don't light up in front of us. Why don't you take a hit, mija? It'll chill you out. It'll be like back in the days. - Remember? - No, I don't remember shit. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about, ese. Put it out. You know you want this, pig. I wouldn't fucking touch that if you were the last bitch on Earth. - Fuck you. - No, fuck you. Why don't you take a seat? Lock it up, Orozco. You look in the mirror, you're just a common fucking gangster bitch like all the rest. Why don't you sit your ass down? Why don't you do what the fuck they tell you, puppet? - Want me to make you? - Lock it up, partner. You know what? - I'll fucking sit down now. - Thank you. Thank you very much. So, Mr Big Evil... why do they call you Big Evil? Cos... ...my evil's big. (TENSE MUSIC) Hey, turn down the music, cos we got a noise complaint or some shit. (APPLAUSE, 'CHICKEN DANCE' PLAYS) (HUMS ALONG TO MUSIC) Need to go faster. I am nailing this. Faster! (LAUGHTER) Come on, baby! - Hey, bro. - Hey. - Hi, baby. - TAYLOR: Cindy, what's up? - I want to introduce you to Janet. - Hi. It's so nice to meet you. Happy birthday. - Thank you. Thank you. - You look beautiful. - Pick up your dress so you don't step on it. - Yeah? - You look beautiful. Bye. - I got to go, all right? Bye. - All grown up. - He spoils her. - I'm going to give you the lowdown. So... - I'm listening. - I'm listening. - Everybody here is pretty much family, like, somehow. They're all Mexican family. (SPEAKS SPANISH) You got cousins, and you got aunts and uncles just like everybody else, and then cousins' cousins. And then you have Brian. - (LAUGHTER) - If you stick around, you're going to see somebody throw up, couple fights. It's fun. It's fun. Enough. Enough. Enough. I'm sorry. Well, I'm Irish, so it's the same thing. Um, big families, and nobody ever gets divorced. - And they all wear purple. - Well, less purple, but just-just... just as much beer. - She's funny. - We get way too drunk and get in fistfights. Yeah, same here. But, you know, you mess with one person, you have the whole family after you. - Well, that's the way to do it. - There you go. - You just described Mexican people. - Can I feel it? Yeah, no, he's actually kicking a lot right now. Here. And I think his feet are right there. Did you feel it? (laughing): Wow. Oh, my God. I like her, Brian. - Buddy. - JANET: Um, how long have you known Brian? GABI: Three years. He and Mike went to the academy together, so... # You'll come apart and you'll go black. # Some kind of night into your darkness. # Colours your eyes with what's not there. # Fade into you. # I think it's strange # you never knew... # (MUSIC FADES) JANET: Brian, it's you. Oh, weird. Hi. Um... (chuckles) Gonna try not to wake you up. (SIGHS) I can't believe that I stayed over. This... This is interesting. I have never shot one before. Uh, maybe that could be our next date. I did go through your wallet. I'm... I'm sorry. I am naturally curious. I hope that's OK. Got to love a guy who has a picture of his mom in his wallet. Um... this? Yeah, uh, Kristen, Mia, Raquel, et cetera, et cetera. Um, you won't... you won't be needing this any more. You were drooling. (BREATHES HEAVILY) ZAVALA: What are we looking for again? TAYLOR: All the food groups ` dope, money and guns. The ghetto will provide, bro. Fucking Sarge. Sarge. We're staking out Curbside. They're gonna spot your unit. What, you think they don't know you're here? Van Hauser wants to file a complaint on you, Taylor. Oh, the USS Van Hauser? The LAPD's stealthiest submarine who only surfaces at the end of watch? He said you were videotaping him. What did I tell you about that shit? Why is he such a bitter dude? If he hates pushing the black and white so much, why doesn't he just leave his badge on the watch commander's desk and go home and eat a bowl of dicks? SARGE: Have some empathy for this man. And, Taylor, I got to put in my log that I verbally counselled you about this fucking camera. What? I was documenting a crime scene. Have a good day, ladies. - Yeah. - Take it easy. Yo, is that Big Evil's mom right there? His mom? Yeah, that's Mrs Evil. Who's the cowboy? I don't know. He's got money; look at his truck. I'm gonna run him. You want to jam this fool? Yes, I do. Plate's clean. Shit. What's our PC? Oh, it's that stupid CD hanging from his rear-view mirror obstructing his vision. (CHUCKLES) - Let's do this. - All right. (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC) Come on, fucker. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Light him up. 13 X-ray-13, we're code six... - (SIREN WHOOPS) - ...on three-nine street east of Wall. Licence plate ` four-boy-one-seven-three-two. Grey Dodge pickup. DISPATCHER: 13, X13, Roger. - Code six... - Get this fucker. (MUFFLED MARIACHI MUSIC PLAYS INSIDE CAR) Hablas Ingles o Espanol? TAYLOR: Gun! Suelta la pistola! Get the fuck out the car! Get the fuck out the car! (SIRENS APPROACH) You good, partner? I'm good. (SPEAKS SPANISH) (INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER) (TYRES SCREECH) You OK? 13 X-ray-13, show code four. Transport this son of a bitch. Yeah, no problem. Hablas Ingles? (CONVERSING IN SPANISH) Cabron. Check out this motherfucker's burner, bro. Holy shit. Dude, it's got more bling than the old lady's wedding ring. (SPEAKS SPANISH) Sure you don't got any holes in you? I'm good, bro. Toss the truck. OROZCO: Hey, who was he shooting at? What? - Who was he shooting at? - Me. That's fucked up, man. (MUSIC STOPS) PILOT: Uh, airlift, show us responding. Fucking... soup. - Woo-hoo! - What's up? Yo, that's big money right there, bro. Shit. Oh, shit. What the fuck is it? Homeboy's a player, dude. We got a surprise for you. Liberace's AK. What? (LAUGHS) Holy shit. 4 TAYLOR: Here we have two of the major food groups ` money and guns. This is the lifeblood of our organisation ` paperwork. The way red corpuscles carry oxygen to the body, paperwork carries information through the department. What are corpuscles? Evening, guys. - Evening. How you doing, Captain? - Sir. - So this is it? These are the guns you took off the cowboy? - Yes, sir. Mind if I pick them up? - Fancy. - That's some nice hardware. Hey, I heard he took a shot at you. - You OK? - Yeah, I'm fine. - Good? - He's good. Liberace's AK. Looks like Liberace's AK. Keep the good work, guys. I really appreciate it. Carry on. - Thank you. - Thank you. Good evening, sir. - Goodnight, Van Hauser. - Evening, sir. - Why do you get nervous? - Women want him, men want to be him, man, he's just... Yeah, I know, but you want him. Dude, I'm not gay, but I'd go down on him if he asked. Sometimes I don't know when you're kidding. And I have to know when you're kidding. - I'm not kidding. - I got to know when you're kidding. - I'm not kidding. (LAUGHS) Oh. Dude, I got to go. Taking Janet to the Philharmonic. Enjoy your white people shit. Oh, thanks. I'll bring you back a burrito. No problem. (CAM'RON'S 'HEY MA' PLAYS) - # Hey, ma - # What's up? - # Let's slide. - # All right. - # All right. # And we gon' get it on tonight. - # You smoke. - # I smoke. - # I drink. - # Me too. # Well, good, cos we gon' get high tonight. - # Got drops. - # Got coupes. - # Got trucks. - # Got jeeps. # All right, cos we gon' take a ride tonight. - # So, ma. - # What's up? - # Let's slide. - # All right. - # All right. # And we gon' get it on tonight. # You're the best. - Yeah. - (LAUGHS) TAYLOR: One more time. (MUSIC FADES) Oh, dude, stop, stop, man. Fuck. (YAWNS) What are you gonna say to the taxpayers when you crash the fucking car? Drink... more... coffee. Dude, I'm on my ninth fucking Red Bull. Bup, we got a fire. - Where? - Over there. 13 X-ray 13, code six on a structure fire. - What's that address...? - 1002. 1002 Sixth Street. Go ahead and send RA and fire. DISPATCHER: 13 X13. Roger on the RA. (TYRES SCREECH) My babies! My babies are in there! - Where? Where? - Are they safe? All right, ma'am. Z, no! Yo, yo, yo, Z. Z, wait for Fire, bro! Fuck! - (COUGHING) - Kids' room! Shit. (COUGHING) Dude, the kids' room! Come on! Come here. (COUGHING) (KIDS CRYING) Hey, come here, come here. Don't be scared. Go with him, go with him. Come here, come here. Come here, come here. Wrap your arms around me. Wrap your legs around me. There you go. - You got it. There you go. - Go, go. I'm going down, Z. Come on, come on, come on. Wrap your legs ` come on. - OK. - There you go. Z, you all right? - I'm good, I'm good. - Come on! - Go, go, go, go, man! - I'm going, man! Fuck! Come on, put your head, put your head right here! Come on... come on... Let's go, let's go! Come down! Coming, man. (COUGHING) Where's my baby girl?! Where is she? - What? - Wait, wait. - Wait, lady. - (SOBBING) You got more kids? My girl! She's 2! Oh, shit. Yo, Z, Z! No! Come on! Go, go, go, go, go! - Fuck, it's hot! - (GRUNTING) (coughing) Come on, baby. Come on, come here. (UNSETTLING MUSIC) - Cover her face! Put that blanket around her face! - I got her, I got her. - (VOICES ECHO DISTANTLY) - I can't breathe, bro! (COUGHING) Come on, go, go, go! I can't see, man! Where you at?! On the right! I can't see you! I'm right here! (WOOD CREAKS) Come on! I got her. - (WOOD CREAKS) - Come on, dude! (COUGHING) Stay still. Stay still. Ah, dude! Come on, come on. (COUGHING LOUDLY) Fuck! You got it, man. (SOBBING) Fuck, I can't see out my... (RETCHES) (PANTING) (COUGHING) - Where's Z, dude? - I'm right here, dude! Z, right, we'll check you out. Sit down right here. Sit down here. Check you guys out. Can you open your eyes? - You all right, bro? - Z... - Give me a bottle of water. (GROANS) Get the fuck away, man! I'm right here. I'm right here. I'm here. Get away, get away, bro. I'm right here, dude. Get away, dude. I'm right here. Shut up, shut up, shut up. Can't fucking feel nothing. Shut up, shut up! We're good, we're good. Bro, shut up. (DRAMATIC MUSIC) For their selfless actions and exemplary service to the citizens of the city, the Medal of Valor is presented to Officer Brian Taylor. Officer Miguel Zavala. (MUSIC FADES) - (ELECTRONIC DOORBELL CHIMES) - What's up, Sandra? Hi, Brian. You feel like a hero? What? You feel like a hero? No. Man, me neither. What's a hero feel like? I don't know, man. (SIGHS) Did I tell you that me and, uh, Gabi got into a huge fight over the fire? No, you didn't tell me that. She was... She's like, 'You're gonna die for someone else's kid when ours hasn't even been born yet.' She's like, 'You're not a fireman.' - Janet said the same thing. - Yeah? Um, I don't think I can go in another burning building. I only went in cos you did. Just... put that shit out there. All right, dickhead, what is it? You remember that cowboy with the blinged-out AK? Yeah, he's probably my cousin. I cross-crossed the numbers on his cell, couple addresses come up in our basic area. - You're not a detective. - That guy is something. He's into something. Oh, really? You think? Dude, DA didn't buy the ADW; only filed a weapons beef. Gang Unit says they'll get to him, but they're too busy or some shit. And Narco's not interested cos we didn't find dope. Yeah, but you're not a detective. - You're not a fireman. - Fuck you. Follow me into the house, dude. I said you're not a detective. - I want to be a detective. - You want to be? Follow me into the house, dude. Follow me into the house. Follow me into the house, dude! 5 (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC) 13 X-ray-13, we're code six at 9318 53 Street. DISPATCHER: 13 X13, Roger. (DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE) (FLIES BUZZ) The fuck? What the fuck? This is weird. (SCREAMING INSIDE) 13 X-ray-13, you need to send us additional unit. DISPATCHER: 13, X13 is requesting two additional units for a building search. 100 26 Street. (MARIACHI MUSIC PLAYING) Policia! Abre la puerta! Policia! MAN: It's OK. It's OK. - Abre la puerta, cabron. - It's OK. Goodbye. - (SPEAKS SPANISH) - Fuck this guy! (SHOUTS IN SPANISH) ...motherfucker! Fuck that shit. - (MAN CURSES IN SPANISH) - TAYLOR: I know what that means. - (HANDCUFFS CLICK) - TAYLOR: Shut the fuck up, man! - Spread your legs. - Abrir las piernas. Spread your fucking legs. Put your fuckin' head back. Head back. Gun, partner. Oh, yeah? (SPEAKS SPANISH) Callate, cabron. Get your fucking head back. - Another gun, partner. - Two, huh? Wads of cash. All right, tell him to get on his knees. A la rodillas. A la rodillas, cabron! Fucking get the fuck over here. 13, X-ray-13, we got one in custody. DISPATCHER: 13, X13, Roger. All right, we're good. All right. What we got? (BABY CRYING) Check it out, partner. I got this motherfucker. (SPEAKS SPANISH) Oh my God. - Take my buddy. - What the fuck, Zavala? - Take him. Vamos. Vamos! I don't know, dude... - I'm gonna go outside. - Yo, Z, you good? - I'm good, bro. - Z? - I'm good! What the fuck? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Federal agents. - Whoa, whoa, all right. Who's in charge here? Are you in charge? - Whoa, what the fuck? - I need to know who's in charge here. Is this man under arrest? - Yes, sir. - What are the charges against this man? - It's off, it's off. Fucking camera's off, man. You guys fucked up. Just lost a POI because of you guys. - Are we clear in there? - Clear. What the fuck, bro? - Where did we fuck up? - I don't fucking know, dude. - Who the fuck is this guy? - I don't fucking know. (TENSE MUSIC) Dude, I just want to fucking talk to this guy, dude. - Let's just get out of here. - I want to fucking talk to him just for a second. - Come on, let's go. - Go ahead. Sir. And, like, I don't want to cause any trouble here, but we just fucking ` we rolled up here, I don't know what's going on. This is the second cowboy like this we've run into in a week. Watch out for these guys. They operate by a different set of rules. You know, I'm just a ghetto street cop. You got to give me something here. We've got indicators he's a runner for the Sinaloa cartel. Yeah, well, we ran him; he came up clean, dude. You guys don't have the proper clearance for any of this information, but I'm gonna throw you a bone. Cartels are operating here, we're on it. - Be careful. - What does that mean, though? It means you and your homeboy need to power down. You just tugged on the tail of a snake. It's gonna turn around and bite you back. - I'm throwing you a bone here. - I'm gonna turn... Be grateful for what I'm giving you. I've given you a warning. - Lay low. - All right, dude. - The fuck? - Can I get your name for my log? - Negative. Move along. (CHUCKLES) Yeah, all right. Sir? You know that there's 5-year-old kids in there? - All right, dude, Z. - For six months? Goodbye. Get off the crime scene and go home. - Bye. - Have a nice night. - Yep. - Fucking Feds. - Z, what the fuck, man? Fuck them. # Wake up, son of mine. # Momma got something to tell you. # Change has come. # I didn't think that shit came over here, bro. Kids, women ` you see that fucking toilet? Filled up with shit? Dude, we had no fucking business being there. We didn't even have a call there. Dude, I don't know what we were fucking rolling up on! You think I knew what we were rolling up on?! # Hang on, son of mine. # A storm is blowing up your horizon. # Human trafficking. # Change has come. # Keep your dignity. # Take the high road. # Take it like a man. # (BABY COOS) Look, he's so cute. You did so good, baby. I love his smile. (chuckling) Just hold his head a little bit. I am. He's fine. No, you got to hold... You got... Baby, you got to hold him like this. Like a football. I know how to hold a baby. - Babe, please. - Like that. Like that. - TAYLOR: Hey. - JANET: Hi. Oh, hey, partner. What's up? - Come here, dude. - Aw. Look who's here. How's Mama doing? Mama's tired. Thank you. Just like baby. Mama wants to choke Daddy. Oh, come on, babe. Did you name him Brian? Oh, sorry, bro. He's a junior. I named him after his daddy. TAYLOR: So, what's his name? Fuck you, dude. Can I hold him? Yeah. So sweet. - You're so gone, bro. - Mm-hmm. (PEACEFUL GUITAR MUSIC) ZAVALA: Hey, baby. What are you wearing? I can say it. What are you wearing? I don't care. You still look good. Yeah, Brian's right here. OK. All right. All right. OK. I love you. Bye. You didn't say hi, man. She was pissed, dude. - How'd you know you were going to marry Gabi? - She told me. I was just some stoner working at my uncle's muffler shop, and one day, she grabbed me by the shoulders and says, 'We're getting married, and you're joining the department 'because you can make a lot of money without a college degree,' and I was like, 'Fuck, yeah.' I mean, you love` You guys, like, never fight. You're happy together. She's my bitch, for sure, dude. I'm just telling you the way it went down. I popped her cherry in high school. She's never been with anybody else. I've never wanted to be with anybody else. You know, it's easy. Things are getting super serious with Janet and me. What, you just found that out? You read that in the paper or something? Homegirl owns your ass, dude. Dude, she wants to move in. She's always over, you know? Why spend the money on two apartments? It's not about the money. No, no, her parents are so traditional, dude. - Oh, yeah? - They will go ballistic. But at least we can tell them we're engaged. Oh, whoa, hold up, bro. Don't play with that shit. Don't ask a broad to marry you because her folks are old-school. - No, dude, you don't understand, man. - No, dude, you don't do that shit. Think about it, man. Dude, after you think about it, think about it again. Jesus. Marriage is forever ` just realise that. It's a promise before God. My grandma was really deep, dude. She's seen it all. You know what I'm saying? When me and Gabi got engaged, bro, she asked me one thing. Do you want to hear it? Fine. Let's hear it. She said, 'Can you live without her?' And if the answer is yes, man up and forget her. Don't string her along. Think about it, bro. I did. FEMALE OFFICER: 13 X43. Officer needs help. - Where? - DISPATCH: Units stand by. X43. Officer needs help. 13, X43. What's your location? - FEMALE OFFICER: I don't know. - What? - That's Van Hauser's car. - Come on, boot! Just book it south. Go, go, go. Find a street sign. Put it out. - I don't see any! - Oh, pendeja. Is there a number on a house? A building number? The house is 3177. Sir, back up! (SCREAMS) Holy shit. Bro, hook a left on Maple. 13, X-ray-13. Show us responding. (SIREN WAILS) (INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER) Right there. Right there. Bro, right there. Go. 13 X-ray-13. Show us code six at Compton and 3-1 Street. - Who is that? Who is that? - Taylor and Zavala. 13, X13. Send me an airship to set up a perimeter. - Oh, shit. - Taylor, would you, uh, call for a rescue? Don't move. Do not move. What'd he look like? - Where'd he go? - Northbound through the houses. He's a Hispanic male, blue chequered shirt. Zero head. He's a parolee. He's fucking huge. 13, X13. Suspected headed northbound. Heavyset male Hispanic, shaved head. Weapon used was a knife ` KMA. Let's go, Z. Let's do this shit. Careful, man. On your left. He's fucking huge. - It's clear over here. - Crossing. - The windows? - I got left. I got right. Push, push, push, push, push, push, push, push, push. Push, push, push. You're on my elbow. You call it out. You call it out if you see it. Dude, I see him ` on the left, on the left. Ready? Go, go, split. - (WOMAN SCREAMING) - MAN: Fuck you! - Bitch. Fucking whore. Try to fuck with me? Fuck you! Get the fuck off her, or I will blow your fucking head off! - I'm done. I ain't resisting. - Yo! Don't fucking look at me! - I ain't resisting, sir. - Shut the fuck up! Get up! Put your hands over your head! Get up! Put your hands over your head. Back up towards me till I tell you to stop. Move. Move. Move. Move. Stop! Get on your fucking knees and cross your goddamn feet together. You hear me? Cross your legs. If I hear a fucking word out of you, I will blow you out of your fucking socks. Book him, Z. 13 X-ray-13. Show a code four. Suspect's in custody. - You good, Z? - I'm good. Are you good? - Goddamn it. - (WHEEZING) You're gonna be all right. You're gonna be all right. You're gonna be all right. You're gonna be all right. Fuck, man, her face is all fucking broken in. 13, X-ray-13. Requesting an additional RA. DISPATCH: 13, X13. Roger on the R.A. You're gonna be all right. We're here for you, all right? ZAVALA: Dude, we got the cavalry coming. That motherfucker's going to pay for what he did. You hear me? Boot? You hear me, boot? - Don't call her boot, bro. - I don't know what her fucking name is! - Is there a tag anywhere? Do you see her tag? - No. (SIRENS WAILING, HELICOPTER WHIRRING) You hear me? She's nodding, dude. She's nodding. She heard me. You're gonna be OK, all right? Do you hear me? It's all good. It's all good. 6 (GRUNTING) You're going to be OK, brother. Fucking cut my vest off. Goddamn it, Taylor. I tell you one fucking thing. Fucking cut my vest off. - All right, brother, we got your back. - Jesus Christ. - Goddamn it. - Got your back, brother, all right? You're good, bro. Got your back. Cut my fucking vest, man. They cut my fucking vest. What's up? You OK? - SARGE: Taylor. - I'm really tired, dude. Why didn't you shoot that son of a bitch, man? You had him dead to rights. I just didn't feel like killing anyone tonight, Sarge. You feel like writing this up? Press is going to want clean paper. - Make sure all the logs match. - ZAVALA: Sarge, you see that? Van Hauser had a fucking Ginsu sticking out of his eye. His eye was cut in half. The lens was hanging off. He's not coming back. - Rookie, too. - What? - She ain't coming back. - She gave me this to give to the watch commander. - On the spot? - Yeah. - Oh, well. - She wouldn't have made probation anyway. - Hell, no. What, because her daddy's not a captain? You know she wasn't cut out for this shit. - Why is that? - The evidence. She almost got Van Hauser killed. You guys are cold, man. You got cold, dead eyes. - You know that? - Yeah, both of us. Yeah, both of you. You have a soul? Yes. Yes. We just leave it at home. Yo, we gonna sit around yapping, or are we gonna get this done? Dude, you guys saved that rookie's life. That was one big fucking fat ese. Can we clear the scene? Division's fucking falling apart over here. We good? You good? - Good, good, good? - We're all good. - Yes? Go back to work. Goodnight, ladies. Ladies and gentlemen, introducing Officer and Mrs Taylor. (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) (SLOW POP MUSIC PLAYS) MAN: Go, Brian! Yeah? (WHOOPING, WHISTLING, APPLAUSE) (SALT N PEPA'S 'PUSH IT' PLAYS) # Ooh, baby, baby. # Baby, baby. # Ooh, baby, baby. # B-Baby, baby # Ooh, baby. # Ah, push it! # Ah, push it! # Ah, push it! (CHEERING, APPLAUSE) # Where am I to go now that I've gone too far? # Help, I'm stepping into the Twilight Zone. # This place is a madhouse, feels like being cloned. # My beacon's been moved under moon and star. # Where am I to go now that I've gone too far? # Soon you will come to know, when the bullet hits the bone. # Soon you will come to know, # when the bullet hits the bone. # - (WHISTLING) - (GLASS CLINKS) TAYLOR: Fuck. All right. Janet,... you got a lot of heart hooking up with a cop, cos it takes a strong person. And I see, like, a lot of cops' wives in here. They're all nodding their heads. You got to take care of her, bro. Cos I'm her big brother now. And every cop in here, we're all her family now, too. (APPLAUSE) I'm-a cry, baby. Shut up. And, Janet, we're all hoping that you can make a man out of Brian, because we've all given up. - (LAUGHTER) - So here we go. To Brian and Janet. - Cheers. - (APPLAUSE) (CHUCKLES) ZAVALA: Can I ask you something? Why the fuck did you get married in your dress blues? If you worked at Best Buy, would you wear that fucking stupid polo shirt? SARGE: I like that polo shirt. I'm representing, man. You know I love you, man? Oh, Jesus. Here they go again. I love you, too, bro. I would lay down my life for you, dude. - SARGE: Why don't you guys get married to each other? - 'I love you, man.' - Get married to each other. - All right, shut the... shut up. Shut up. Everybody take a shot. Have a shot. Have a shot. Arriba! (CHANTING IN SPANISH) Salud, bitches! Ah! My boy, Garcia, he's a fucking beast, man. All right? I see this motherfucker knock an asshole out with one punch. Yoked assholes, man. Yoked assholes. From the joint, when they had weight piles. You know what I'm talking about? You don't know what I'm talking about. You're fucking 12 years old. Cops like him... like soldiers. He took a bullet for me. My bullet, man. He took my bullet. He took my bullet. That's what he was. That's what he was to me. It should have been me. Cos he was a good guy. I was shit. Fuck it, man. GABI: Give me a kiss. You'll learn this. You'll learn. Marriage is really basic. Right? There's just, like, a couple guidelines. One, you got to give it up all the time. Oh...? - All the time. - You love that. - I mean, I don't think... I don't hate that idea. - ZAVALA: It's not a bad thing. It's not a bad idea. No, seriously, girls throw it at cops. - Throw what? What exactly? - Their pussy ` girls throw it. So you can't give him an excuse, girlfriend. You cannot give him an excuse. I've actually seen that before. It's called... it's called assault on a peace officer. - Are you ready? - JANET: Yeah. - Be a freak. - Boom, part two. - Try new things. Like... - JANET: What? - You know, the gooch. - The what? - No, no, no, no, no. - The gooch? - Uh, Texas twister. - No. No, that's something that's made up. The Internet made that up. - You want to know what Mike's like? - No! No! No! (RAPID BABBLING) - Babe, I love you so much. - TAYLOR: Gabi! Gabi! - The Western, you know? Open to explore. Right? - Gabi, it's our wedding! - Cup him, suck him. - This is way too much, baby. - Cup him and suck him. What? What the f...? Gabi. Gabi. - Venture off a little bit more. - No, no, no. - Venture off? - Oh, shit! - They swear they don't like it, but... - Dude, really? I'm happy, man. I'm happy, brother. Janet's dope, dude. You're my brother and everything, dude, but you're a piece of shit. She know that? Yeah, she knows who I am. But we can't get into something with somebody we love. She knows who I am. Yeah, I know who you are. You're a piece of shit. If you break her heart, I'm going to fuck you up. That's good to know. If anything happened to you, I would take care of your kids. If you had any. And I would take care of her. I will take care of Janet. 7 DISPATCH: 13-A-41. Vicious animal. Trinity and Jefferson. Large pit bull running up and down... What's in the stack? Anything good? Let's see here. Uh... Business dispute. Request police mediation. One neighbour threw a cup of water on the other neighbour's window. Yeah, we're not buying that. 390 male, intoxicated person outside a liquor store. Get the fuck out of here. There's a drunk man outside the liquor store? Welfare check ` woman requests PD contact her elderly mother. - Yeah, buy that one. - You serious? Yeah, if we buy a couple of these, maybe they'll send us a code three call. All right, cool. I'll hit her up for the next hot shot. On this episode, we're rolling to a call. A woman called the station to check on her elderly mother, so we're going to go. Yeah, these are the calls most agencies deal with, you know. Not every call's a foot pursuit or a car chase. Some guys in other agencies have never even drawn their weapon or been in a gunfight. Yeah, but here, that's just half your shift. In the South End, we will get involved in more capers in one deployment period than most cops see their entire career. Hell, yeah. (BANGS ON DOOR) Mrs Williams! Mrs Williams, police officers! Run around the back, check it out. All right, here we go. TAYLOR: Just gonna wait for my partner. He's gonna check the back, see if she's around the back over there. Oftentimes, a lot of these people, they're very old people ` they can't hear us, you know. They can't hear the, uh... they can't hear the, uh, - hearing aids, you know, so, um... - ZAVALA: Nothing. All right, so, uh, the owner of this house is actually the daughter of the woman who lives in it, so she gave us permission for the welfare check, so we're going to... we're going to boot the door. Officer Zavala specialises in booting doors. - I kick doors down. - There you go. I kick doors down. Say it in English now, bro. - I kick doors down. - Wait, did you check if it was unlocked? Ladies and gentlemen, always a good idea to make sure the door is locked before you boot it. - Are you going to cut that out? - Yeah. Sorry. It was always locked. Clearly, my, uh, partner always knew that. Ah, man... You know what's going to happen, right? - What? - She's going to roll through, coming, you know, from church or the store or whatever, and then she's going to see property damage, and what's going to happen? What's going to happen? We're going to be the bad guy. (GRUNTS) Oh, shit. - We got a dead body, man. - Whew! Policia! Policia! - What have we got? Squatters? - Yeah, eses been kicking it back here for sure. Policia! LAPD. Let's roll through. (FLOORBOARDS CREAK) - You good? - Clear. - (SIGHS) That is wrong. - Dude, I said it was clear. All right. Just filming it, man. Oh, I found her, dude. What's up? (GROANING) (FLIES BUZZING) 13 X-ray-13. We need a supervisor and two additional units at our location. An RA for an elderly female, approximately 70 years old. Not conscious, not breathing. WOMAN (over radio): 13 X13's requesting two additional units and a supervisor. 5171 Maple, incident 1467, already 13-51. What, is she... Grandma praying to the dope gods or some shit? Dude, that's not a fucking grandma. (HOLLOW TAPPING) - Don't fucking play on it. - No, look. Hollow. Somebody's opened it before, dude. That's what that means. Take that shit out. - You can't pull it out yourself? - Dude, just fucking pull it out, bro. Party time. Uh, Z. Z. Dude, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. (WHISPERING): You see that pot? Yeah. - Shit's still steaming. - Oh, shit. - We're going in. Ready? - Go ahead. Brian. Brian. (GROANS) What is that, dude? Is that a body in there? Yeah, there's bodies in there, dude. Thanks for the fucking update. (RETCHES) Fuck, man. Is it clear, dude? - (FLIES BUZZ) - Clear. What does it say, dude? What's that shit say? 'Keep bringing them. Ha ha ha.' (RETCHES) Fuck! Come on. Get your shit together, dude. Pull your shit together, man. (RETCHES) Let's get the fuck out of here. Let's get out of here. Fuck! Sick motherfucker, man. Who'd do shit like that? (UNSETTLING MUSIC) What is that shit, dude? I don't fucking know, dude. I've never seen that kind of shit. - You have those fucking... you have hand sanitizer, bro? - No, I don't. I'm Serene Branson on the scene in South Los Angeles at one of the largest narcotics seizures this year. In addition to the drugs, officials are telling us there was a very gruesome discovery ` an unknown number of bodies showing evidence of torture. A police official familiar with the investigation denied rumours Mexican drug cartels are responsible for the murders. DISPATCH: Need units information only in a 390 man in a vehicle... Gabi wants to know if you and Janet want to roll to the Dodgers game with us tonight. Oh, dude, we're going to Santa Barbara. All right, fuck you, then, dude. I'll sell that shit online or something. (CHUCKLES) Oh, there's Tre right here. What's up, Tre? What's up back? What you doing? Doing what I do. You know what I'm saying? Same shit, different day. Ain't shit changed. What's up with y'all? Slow motion. You know that little incident you and I had? You kept it G. You didn't snitch on me. And I respect that. So check this out. - My people just got out of Folsom Prison from up north. - Oh, yeah? - Word is you got a hit on y'all, man. Y'all been green-lit. - TAYLOR: Hey, come on, man. We're cops. Everybody wants to kill us, Tre. Hey, I'm just telling you what they're saying, man. ZAVALA: No, you know what? We appreciate the info, man, but... this don't mean you get a pass if we catch you slipping. I ain't looking for no fucking pass. I do what I do. You know what I'm saying? ZAVALA: I have to say it, though. You know how it is. All right, what you doing this weekend, Tre? - You like the Dodgers? - You gonna slide a nigga some tickets or something? - Hey, man, have a good weekend. - You like the Dodgers? - What's up with it? Yeah. - Have a good weekend, kid. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Slide me some tickets. - Shut the fuck up! - (TAYLOR LAUGHS) Dude, did you fuck with my...? Come on, man. Did you fuck with my shit? I don't fuck with your shit. - Damn it, Mike. Come on, man. - Dude, don't be a little bitch about it, dude. I didn't fuck with your shit, dude. You fucked with my shit. It was in totally different order. Why do you have an investigation report on here, dude? I don't have an investigation report. It's your handwriting. Don't be an idiot. It's all... this is fucked-up, man. Did you drop it or something? Dude, there's three types of pages... Man, it's all out of order, man. It's all fucking out of order! Ah, it's a pain in the ass. I'm sorry, partner. Wait till they hit a small street. At a stop sign, you fucking tap the bumper. We're gonna get out and blast. LA LA: Fuck, no. What do you mean, no? We should get them when they go to lunch at that Chinese place. That Chinese place is crawling with cops. We got to get these fuckers when they're alone. We can fucking follow their asses home and hit them there. White boy's in fucking Simi Valley. The other fucking fool's in San Gabriel. We got to get these fuckers at the same time! E, this is one time, homey, not a bunch of fucking niggas. Motherfucker! These fuckers are straight from the fucking street, homeboy! You stop fucking around! You get in the fucking car, you want to fucking hang with the fucking carnales, now you fucking pay the fucking price of fucking admission, homeboy! I'll fucking kill this fucking bitch, all right? You shut the fuck up! Come on, Big E. Come on, homey. I'll fucking kill you, motherfucker! Don't you fucking disrespect! Got this shit. Fuck, man. I don't know where the fucking rubber band is, either, dude. Don't blame me for the rubber band, dude. You just took the rubber band off. If you hadn't have fucking put everything out of order, dude, then the rubber band wouldn't be out in the... Look, dude, it's the butterfly effect, OK? Do you know what the butterfly effect is? - Nope. - It's the butterfly effect. - Look it up. - Just cos you say it twice doesn't mean that I get it the second time. Look it up, dude. This is fucking stupid. Those motherfuckers got bulletproof vests. We need to him them with some AK's. - Don't fucking back out, La La! - Fuck you! Fuck you! When the fuck have I ever backed out from shit? Huh? - Huh? - Get that fucking camera out of my face! I'm just saying, we just can't fuck this shit up. I don't give a fuck, man. You know me. I'll do the motherfucking time. I just don't want the big homeys fucking whacking me ` fucking whacking me ` for fucking up. We need a fucking plan, and you fucking know it, homey. Think about it. That's all I'm saying. Fucking head back. - (SIGHS) - I'll get some fucking big guns from the border brothers. 8 (SNICKERS) Never fall asleep in a room full of cops. - (LAUGHTER) - What? Zavala, that shit ain't even fucking funny! Just cos you won the fucking award doesn't give you licence to be a fucking asshole! - You got shit on your face, man. - Hey, hey, hey. - Fuck you! What, are we in the third fucking grade? Keep it up, it's going to earn you a risk management case. Give me this fucking camera. I'm serious, man. This department's built you up. They will fucking tear you down. Laugh! You can laugh, you fucking idiot. Who left their shaving cream on the table? How was Santa Barbara? Awesome. Janet's pregnant. What?! Get out of here, bro! Are you serious? Already? She's not even Mexican. Yeah, she's going for the ultrasound tomorrow, but three of those little piss stick things... - Yeah, yeah, EPTs, yeah. - Positive, positive, positive. Whoa, dude. Congrats, bro. Congrats. That's when we fucking graduate. We fucking get the upgrade right now. Not fucking gonna be little fucking paisas no fucking more. Right? That's what we're gonna fucking do, OK? You want to come into our fucking hood and fucking talk shit to us? - You fucking do this shit right. - They don't fucking respect us. Fuck, yeah. You guys want to fucking collect? You guys got to fucking put up! This time, we're gonna fucking do it right. Fucking guys have some fucking balls! Hey, trip, though, E, after we get these motherfuckers, you know, it's gonna be a little hot. It's gonna be a little hot in the hood, though. - Right that, La? Hey, La? - BIG EVIL: We're gonna get the fuck out of here after that. I'm gonna fucking take you guys to fucking Vegas. You guys fucking do this shit right, I'm gonna treat you right. But if we don't fucking do this, we can never fucking come back. That's the fucking thing. Wouldn't it be crazy if our kids were pushing a black-and-white together one day? Screw that. I want my kid to have an honest job ` like a politician. (BOTH LAUGH) (HORN HONKS) - Whoa. - Oh, idiot. Light him up. (SIREN WHOOPS) He's running. 13, X-ray-13. We're going to be following a possible code 37 vehicle, northbound Hooper from 4-2 Street. Grey Toyota minivan, license plate number 6-Queen-4-9-9-7-3. Requesting backup, airship and a supervisor. - (TYRES SQUEAL) - Yeah, you're clear right. Go. Go, go, go, go, go. Fuck, yeah. You got this motherfucker. You got this motherfucker. Come on, Z. Come on, Z. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! - ZAVALA: Fuck! - TAYLOR: Go. Get the fuck out of the car. Go, go, go! TAYLOR: Mike, come on! Let's go, let's go, let's go! DISPATCH: X13, what's your location? 13 X-ray-13. Suspect running on foot. Male Hispanic, dark clothing. - (RAPID GUNFIRE) - Shit! - (INDISTINCT RADIO TRANSMISSION) - (GRUNTING) Fucking missed, stupid! - Fuck! - Go. Go, go, go, go! - Through here! Through here! - Fuck! Move! - Tell her to get down, bro. - (SPEAKING SPANISH) - (WOMAN SHOUTING IN SPANISH) - Fuck. Shit, dude. No dice, man. We're fucking trapped. - Dude, call Dispatch. - My fucking hand, man. - What's up, bud? You got hit? Did you get hit? - Shit. Fucking call Dispatch. I got no signal! Fuck! Fuck. I don't... (SPEAKING SPANISH) - Fuckers. - (WOMAN SHOUTS IN SPANISH) - Shut up! - ZAVALA: This is 13, X13! - Come on in the fucking door. - Come on. - Officers need help! - (WOMAN SHOUTS IN SPANISH) - Callate! Multiple suspects with automatic weapons. We're barricaded in... in an apartment building. (WOMAN SHOUTING IN SPANISH, BABY CRYING) Shit! Shit! Tell that bitch to shut the fuck up, man! (speaking Spanish) Tell her to be quiet, Z! 25022 Hooper Place, apartment three. Those motherfuckers are in there. We're all good. We're all good, bro. They're sending the cavalry. They're sending the whole fucking... (RAPID GUNFIRE) Ah, fuck! Oh, fuck! Oh, fuck! Fuck! - (GUNFIRE STOPS) - BIG EVIL: Reload. - Partner! - (BABY CRYING) - Dude. - Partner! - Bro, you all good? - (COUGHS) Yeah. - Was it Big Evil and the army? We can't hold them off. We got to lay out our base of fire and pivot. What the fuck does that mean, dude? We're shooting our way out of here, bro. - Can these fools get out? - No, we got these motherfuckers, homey. Fools ain't going nowhere. - Z, look at me, all right? - Look at me. - OK. On three, dude. You're going to empty your mag and run. - OK. OK. - You ready? One. Two. Three. (GUNSHOTS) (SOBBING) Go! Move, move, move! To the door, Z! To the door! Move, Z! Go! Go! Move, man, move, move, move. (DOGS BARK IN DISTANCE) Over the fence, man. You see the fence? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Go, go, go, go! - Z. - There's a wall. - Wall. Go. Got me? Got you. - Ready? - Hop over, bud. Go, go, go. - (GUNSHOT) - Argh! They're everywhere. Z... Z! Move! - Move! - Take the left. (DOGS BARKING) I think we killed that guy. Good. (CHUCKLES) Just the dogs. Just the dogs. Where's the fucking cavalry, man? I don't know! (DOGS BARKING) - Partner? - What? This sucks! Who's that? Us? Is that PD? - (TYRES SCREECH) - Slow, slow, slow, slow. - (AUTOMATIC GUNFIRE) - Z, gun! Hit 'em! (TYRES SCREECH) MAN: Curbside gang, putos! (GASPS) (GRUNTS) I lit that asshole up, man! - Brian! - (GASPING) Bro. Ah, dude. Is it bad? Fuck. - Wait, wait, let me see, let me see. - (COUGHS) Fuck, dude. (COUGHS) It's bad, it's bad. You know what? But I've seen guys way worse make it. (GROANS) Dude, what are you fucking doing, man? - Hold on. - Don't you do that to me! - Just let me get up! - Stay the fuck down! - I need to put pressure on your wound. - (WHEEZES) Where the fuck is everybody?! (DOG BARKS) - I don't want to die here. - You're not gonna die here. You're not gonna die. God loves cops. I fucked up, dude. I fucked up, man. Don't tell Janet I fucked up. (COUGHS) - (WHIMPERS) - I'm gonna stay right here, dude. I'm gonna stay right here, OK? - (SOBS) - It's OK. It's OK. Dude, dude. It's OK. It's OK to do it right now, man. I fucking love you, bro! (COUGHS) Officer down! I need some fucking help! I need some fucking help! Please don't go right now. (SOBBING): Telling you, bro, don't fucking go right now. Don't go right now! No. What the fuck? Checkmate, puto. (ALL LAUGH) Rest in piss, bitch. (SPITS) Got you, motherfuckers. - Happy fucking ending, homey. - Hell, yeah. Celebration time. Look at the streets of L.A. (SIRENS APPROACHING) - (TYRES SCREECH) - Oh, shit! Fuck! - Aw, hell no. - Shit! Fuck, man! LAPD! Drop the guns! Drop 'em! Curbside gang, putos! Fuck you! (ANGRY METAL MUSIC) Cease fire! Cease fire! OFFICER: Shots fired, shots fired. Units, be advised. Shots fired. X76, shots fired, shots fired. Codes show code four. Suspects are in custody. (WHISTLES) Damn. Two male Hispanics, two female Hispanics suffering from multiple gunshot wounds. Also gonna need additional supervisors and units at my location. DISPATCHER: X76 is requesting additional units and supervisors in the south alley east of Broadway, north of 401. Where the fuck is Taylor and Zavala?! DISPATCHER: Is there a code four at X13's location? OFFICER: 13, L10, the original help call was for X13. Do we have a code four on X13? (SIRENS WAIL IN DISTANCE) 13, L10, do I have all my people accounted for? DISPATCHER: X13, come in. Air 11 over. Unit, come in. We're unable to locate 13 X13. They're last location was... Shit! Fuck! Goddamn it. It's them. Mike! Mike! Shit! Shit! Brian. Brian! Goddamn it. Fucking A. (BAGPIPES SKIRL) (CLANN AN DRUMMA'S 'SERGEANT MACKENZIE') # Lay me down # in the cold, cold ground # where afore # many more have gone. # Lay me down # in the cold, cold ground # where afore # many more have gone. # Uniform personnel, attention! (BREATHES HEAVILY) (SOBBING SOFTLY) (SNIFFLES) (WHISPERING): I'll help you up. Shit. (BREATHES HEAVILY) Uh... He was my-my brother. (BREATHES HEAVILY) (POIGNANT PIANO MUSIC) (DRAMATIC MUSIC) Yo, if your kid was a girl, would you let her be a cop? Bro, would I want my daughter packing a burner so she could protect herself from the assholes of the world? Hell, yeah. I want to have a daughter, man. That'd be so cool. - Just don't let her date cops. - She's not dating anyone. - OK. - Ever. - (LAUGHS) All right. Did I ever tell you about the first time I spent the night with Gabi? I don't want to hear that, dude. Dude, I got a hell of a big family, right? - Z, fuck, dude. - Wait, wait, wait, wait. I got a hella big family, bro. Someone's always at my house, right? But one time, Gabi's parents bounced to Ensenada and her brother crashed at his girlfriend's, - so I spent the night at her house. - Hmm. And this was gonna be the night, dude. - Hmm. - It was gonna be the night. - Do you know what I'm saying? - No. What are you talking about? - Well, I'll tell you what I'm talking about. - OK, cool. So, we're in her parents' bed, right? And it's on. It's about to go down. - I'm taking off her chones- - Chones? What? - Her skivvies, dawg. Come on, bro. - Oh, right. And I'm like, 'Finally,' right? 'Fucking finally!' But then we hear this noise. Dude, someone's in the pad. So I hide underneath the bed, and then I hear people coming up. And it's her parents. - This is the second floor, bro. - What? - I got nowhere to go. Homegirl's trying to distract them, but it ain't happening, right? Then the footsteps grow louder. Louder and louder. - Then the door opens. Oh, my God, bro, I'm naked underneath the bed. - (LAUGHS) And then all I could see is little footsteps. I see his hairy feet and I see her nails all painted. And, like, they're yapping, they're doing their thing. And they crash. And this is the part that I never told Gabi. I hear a little smoochy smooch and I hear some shit. And I'm, like, praying, please no. And they did it, bro. - What? What?! - They got down, dude! Oh! I'm talking Gabi's parents fucking, dude! - All right, I got it. - No! That shit was so traumatic, man. It must have been a little uncomfortable around her folks after that. Yeah, bro, cos her father is a freak. Dude, I guess when you been married that long, you got to mix it up a little bit. I tried rolling like that with Gabi, and she was like, 'Hell, no, you're not touching me there.' (BOTH LAUGHING) Makes me fucking uncomfortable, man. I know, I know. You know why? Cos you're a freak, too. - Don't go there, bro. Just don't go... - (LAUGHING) Oh, I fucking can't breathe, dude! Holy shit. DISPATCHER: Any Newton unit, 211 just occurred... (LAUGHTER CONTINUES) Oh, fuck. (SIGHS) - Let's go fight crime or some shit. - OK. (BOTH LAUGH) (BOTH SIGH) (TAYLOR LAUGHS) TAYLOR: Whew! www.able.co.nz Captions were made with the support of NZ On Air. Able 2017