Captions were made with the support of NZ On Air. www.able.co.nz Copyright Able 2021 (MUSIC CONTINUES) (TCHAIKOVSKY'S 'DANCE OF THE SUGAR PLUM FAIRY') - SPEAKS TE REO MAORI: - Yes, love. - Oh, thank you. - So easy. - Yay! Kai time. - I know, I know. - Whoo-ooo! What've you got? - Oh, I need to be closer to the food. - There are times if I'm hungry and I know the staff are downstairs, I just can't eat by myself. I sort of` that manaaki in me, that I need to feed everybody else. But it's a way for me to catch up with everyone as well, see where everyone is at. - So, Fehi. - Yeah? - SPEAKS TE REO: - SPEAKS TE REO: - Ooh, you understand, eh? - Te reo Maori is part of my identity, so I like to feel that it's... normal to use te reo where we can. Yeah. And I don't want staff to feel uncomfortable (CLEARS THROAT) when speaking te reo Maori. They are` have every right to use their reo as well, be that Tongan or Samoan language ` we want to feel comfortable using all our languages. - So, my wife and I were thinking, um, about everything, and,... you know, with the Tongan culture and everything like that for her and` Well, for me especially, but for my` - Are you gonna get a gold tooth? - We were thinking of getting our gold teeth, like you. My Tongan heritage means the makeup of who I am, and it does add` you know, it adds lots of value to the person that I've become and also to my children and wife. Me and my wife. Yeah. - D'you want a gold tooth? Oh, wow. - Me and my wife. - You and your wife? - CHUCKLES: Look at her look. - I'm kinda nervous, cos him and I have been talking about this for a while, but I've never... said yes. I've come close, but I'm not sure if I really wanna go through it. If I do, it'll probably be right at the back. (LAUGHS) - (LAUGHTER) - Not loyal, eh, to the Tongan side? - You have to put it to the front, darling. - Oh. People usually use their own gold jewellery? - Yeah. So, this one is my auntie's` my late auntie's ring. - Aww. - Oh, wow. - So I've got` - It's so beautiful. - Mm. - So you can use your own gold. Traditionally, the gold was passed down through generations, so it represents family. - (CHUCKLING) - Look at all your gold. - You gonna get grillz, Francis? Your full mouth? - (LAUGHTER) - No. I just want one! - (SIGHS) This is so typical of Fehi. She's, of course, you know, Tongan at heart, so she's... probably just wanting... him` us to get our... niho done. - You should put 'F-T'. - No, F for Francis and K for Kaiora. - 'F-K'? - (LAUGHTER) - Forever. - Nah, but do you know what that's gonna look like? - People are gonna be like, 'F...K'? - No, just F. - (LAUGHTER) - OK. F. - I think Francis and Kaiora would look... perfect with a gold tooth. Just look at mine. (LAUGHS) (WHIMSICAL MUSIC) (TENTATIVE STRING MUSIC) - Today in our care, we're looking after Mr Dennis Te Whare, who was 64 years old, and he died of a stroke. Now, I've been doing this work for 15 years now, and sometimes I just can't quite get a handle on... on a tupapaku and their size, so I warn the family that we may need to swap caskets and upgrade him into a casket that's a little bit more spacious for him. So we want him to be in the casket like this, not like this, cos that's not resting in peace. Resting in peace is (SPEAKS TE REO). But out of the two, what are your thoughts? - Yeah, definitely the black one, yeah. - OK. And what that means is that if he can't, then we'll upgrade to this one. Kei te pai? We'll go into the dressing room. Yeah? Come through to the dressing room. Come in. Haere mai. - Oh, did he even get new boots and shoes? - (CHUCKLES) Yeah. - Faa, too good. Oh, Hush Puppies, even. - Oh, OK. Well, we'll just start with the socks first,... - OK, cool. - ...and then we'll put his pants on, and then we can put his shoes on after that. - The whanau have finished dressing Mr Te Whare, and so it's now time for us to place him into his casket. - I can see my husband assessing things. I don't see him in this situation often ` because he doesn't come across these situations often ` so he's now analysing what's before him. And he knows at the same time he's got to quickly think about this and move. - So, we're gonna come down into my arms. That's the one. - There we go. - Sit a little bit more... over to my side. So we place him into his casket, and upon doing so, we realise that the casket is just a fraction too small to make him look peaceful and restful. Darling? - Yes? - Can you take` uh, print another nameplate, a silver one, eh? - We do need to be transparent with the whanau, because in their mind, he's going into a mahogany casket, but now he's going into a different coloured casket with different coloured handles. There's lots of things that we need to consider, and we just have to address them in the most calm possible way. - I just wanted to show you he couldn't fit in the one that we chose. - Oh, yeah. - And this one's just right. - OK. - We've got it ready. - Oh. So I just wanted to show you beforehand. - Yeah, that's beautiful. Yeah. - And... - Aww, that's nice. Yep. - All right? So he's ready to be placed in now, so we'll place him in. - D'you wanna know something, though? I actually wanted this colour. (LAUGHS) - There we go. - I actually wanted this colour. - You wanted the lighter colour? - But I went with what my, um` - Brother. - But I actually wanted this colour. (LAUGHS) - Well, you got your colour. - Yay. - Yeah. So, it was the same on the inside, but it's just the colour's changed, OK? - Cool. Oh, that's awesome. - 10 more minutes and we'll bring you to see him. - Oh, beautiful. Thank you. - Nga mihi. Kei te pai. - Thank you. - And was she OK? - Oh, it's just one of those things ` I'm never, ever gonna squash anyone in a casket. They'll probably haunt me. - SOFTLY: OK, matua. We're gonna make this work for you. - Ah, look at that. - (CHUCKLES) - Look at that. The proof is in the pudding. Mr Te Whare looks beautifully rested in his casket. The family are pleased. - He looks comfortable, eh? I like the way that they've` - Fits good. - Yeah. It's so nice. (SNIFFLES) Man, he's happy, eh? - Yeah, he's tau. He'll just sink in more now. (GENTLE MUSIC) - (KISSES) - We are now transferring Mr Te Whare home, where he will lay in state for two nights, and Francis will be the funeral director; he will oversee this with the whanau. - Lifting. - Take your time. - (WOMAN CALLS KARANGA) (POIGNANT MUSIC) - SPEAKS TE REO MAORI: - The first part of the journey is done, and Mr Te Whare lays peacefully in his home, surrounded by his whanau. - (WHANAU SINGS WAIATA) - Step up. - Step sideways ` - that little step before the big one... - ...into that new office,... - ...new career,... - ...new mindset,... - ...because you can do it. - Tautoko. - So make tracks. * (TENTATIVE STRING MUSIC) - I am now designing my tissue box, and I'm really excited. At the same time, I'm unsure how to do that by myself, so I'm searching around who I can go to help me design this package. Because it needs to look elegant. It needs to... look the Tipene Funerals part. - We can do customised design for your own company. I could put 'Tipene Funerals' on this box? - Yeah, whatever you want that you can put on the box. - Well, I think my husband would appreciate that. - (LAUGHS) - Do you do toilet paper in this...? - Yeah. - Oh my gosh. - Everything, yeah. - So I could buy lots and sell them? Oh my goodness. - You can resell as well. That is expanding your` - I feel like I've got another business on the side. I'm absolutely excited about branching out with these` with the tissue branding, and eventually I'd like to have my own toilet paper branding. Tipene Tissues and Tipene Toilet Tissues. One for upstairs and one for downstairs. (WHIMSICAL MUSIC) (SOMBRE MUSIC) - Today in our care, we have a 3-month-old baby. It's the most unnatural thing to look after a pepi, especially being a parent ` you wanna go before your children and let them bury you. - It's always a soft spot for me. But I just take them under my wing and treat them like my own and try and get them back to their families as quick as I can. Let's get you home, eh, brother? I can't do it quickly. I usually go outside and have a coffee and have some time out, but, um... Clear my head, sometimes shed a little tear. - Embalmers can become desensitised to death when embalming all the time, but Jay needs to take time out for himself to regather his thoughts, especially when it comes to babies. It's important that he has time out to clear his mind and his hinengaro. - But at the end of the day, we're only human. Rest in peace, bubba. - SPEAKS TE REO MAORI: (WHIMSICAL MUSIC) - (PLAYS UPBEAT MELODY) - As a funeral director and the company director, I've seen many, many deceased people, tupapaku, and so it was a timely reminder that it's important to spend time with the ones I love the most. Sometimes that might mean just having a jam and having a sing-song and creating a memory that hopefully will last forever. What song do you know, son? - Just go with the flow. - Nikora's now in a space where he loves to just jam with any instrument. - He's got a good ear, but I want him to learn some of our old songs and then, you know, create his repertoire of waiata, the old waiata being his platform to start from. Tutira mai. - FRANCIS, KAIORA: # Tutira mai nga iwi. - Are you singing? - # ALL: Tatou, tatou e. # Tutira mai nga iwi. - Tatou, tatou. - # Tatou, tatou e. - 'These moments, I find, are precious times without ourselves.' - # ...me te aroha... - Cos hardly ever do we get moments like these with each other, especially being at mahi. - # ...tatou e. # (WHIMSICAL MUSIC) (TENTATIVE STRING MUSIC) - Oh, wow. CHUCKLES: Oh, yuss! I'll let it boil for a bit. Me and fish heads, we go way back. Like, way back. Me and kina` Me and kai moana, we just... we have a true relationship. Mmm. These are beautiful. Mmm. - My wife loves fish heads and kina. Um, I need to make sure when she's eating the kina that they're fresh. If they're not fresh, then, oh, gets, you know... Uh, yeah. A lot of gas is released throughout the night. - I'm having kina. - Oh, that smells strong. - Yes. And I'm eating all of it. I dunno who` - Ooh. Ooh! Seafood. - The fish head smell goes right through the furniture and the carpet, and the smell` and it's quite smelly. - I know my kids and him, they're going to complain cos of the smell, but,... oh, look, too bad. Mum wants to have a kai. Ooh, get on my plate. Yes! Kia ora. At mahi, though? Ohh, it's a big no-no. You're not allowed to, like, have any stink, smell whatsoever, so while he's gone, I'm gonna cook these fish heads up, and I'm gonna have a good kai without him complaining. Honestly, people don't believe that I can eat all of this, but you just watch me eat it all. - I was brought up around it, so I've seen it all, but I just never had the guts to taste it. But, you know, I do actually watch her eat the fish heads and I think, 'I wish` I hope one of my kids follow in her footsteps.' - Mmm. (SUCKS) - When she sits down and eats those fish heads and... (IMITATES SUCKING) and sucks and does all that gestures, it actually is` looks beautiful. I wish I could eat it. So, um, she's in her happy space eating the fish heads and kina, and I'm happy... watching her be happy. - (SUCKS) Mmm. They're beautiful. So good. * - Honestly, I'm so excited about all of this. (LIGHT-HEARTED ORCHESTRAL MUSIC) - I have a selection of tissue boxes, and now I'm placing them around the funeral home. Who's that there? Is that you, Vanessa? Hi. Come and have a look. - Oh my gosh! They're signature tissue boxes. (LAUGHS) - I know, right? - That is so cool. - I think it'll go with this colour scheme in here too. We can put it over here, look. - So when you set people down, 'Have a tissue.' - 'Here's a tissue. Have a tangi.' - (LAUGHS) - 'You want a tangi?' - 'D'you know what? Here, take the box.' - 'Here we go. Take the box!' So, yes. - How do you think he'll react? Yeah, that's a good question. Yes. (SIGHS) It's hard to say with my husband. I don't know. I'm unsure how he's` how he... is going to react. But I do know if I love the tissue paper, then he should love the tissue paper too. So... I'm hoping that if the design doesn't win him, the tissue paper will. Hi. - Hi. - How are you? - Very good. - I've been working on a little project. I've been taking time out to design our own tissue box. What do you think? - Beautiful. - (LAUGHS) Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. There's` There's a test here. So I want you` Oh! You were supposed to try this one first. - Oh, OK. - All right. Now try that tissue. - Ohh. - I know, right? - I'm trying to cry so I can wipe my eyes. (SNIFFLES) - (LAUGHS) Have a tangi. Exactly. - Yeah, I'm crying. - OK. (CHUCKLES) - There's some tears. (GASPS) Fantastic. I needed to give the tissues the test, so I gave some tears, wiped them, and they were absorbing like a sponge. Top. - Yeah, it was almost like, um,... watching him, um, apply for an acting scene. You know? And he's, like, really forcing it out of his eyes. Like... And I was wondering if he was gonna get there or not. Somehow he did, eh. You know, he just grabs the tissue, and he's just like, 'Yep, it's working.' LAUGHS: Oh, bruv. Really? - At the end of the day, people wipe their eyes and their hupe and their roimata, and so it's so important... - Exactly. - ...to be able to encapture in a beautiful tissue. - We were` - (GASPS) And there's another brand? - So, these are the boxes that we have` - All these years, we've been using this, and it's like sandpaper. - In all honesty, I could probably say right now... (SIGHS) he loves the paper more than he does the design. Yes? - Yeah. So next time I wanna cry over spilt milk... - Are you blown away? - Oh! Am I ever. - (LAUGHS) - I gotta blow my nose, I'm so blown away. Oh my goodness. (BLOWS) - Oh, thank you. (WHIMSICAL MUSIC) (SOMBRE MUSIC) So we're at the final day of Mr Te Whare's tangihanga, and the family have put on a beautiful hakari, or a banquet ` a kai fit for a king. But this is the way to go, eh? Hakari first, eh? - Mm, mm. Beautiful. - (LAUGHTER, CHATTER) - Everybody can disperse from the urupa. - That's right. That's right. Following the hakari, we'll have a short service inside the house. - (BELL TOLLS) - SPEAKS TE REO MAORI: - (ALL SING WAIATA) - (WOMAN, MAN CALL KARANGA) - We're now leaving Mr Te Whare's home to drive an hour south to the marae at Mangatangi to lay one last time where his ancestors lay before him. - (WOMAN CALLS KARANGA) (SOLEMN MUSIC) - The best tributes will be spoken by the top orators of the tribe, and the best songs will be sung, and those will all go with Mr Te Whare on his final journey. - CALLS IN TE REO MAORI: - It has been eight years since Mr Te Whare's late wife, Aroha, has passed away, and so it is our belief that they're now together in spirit, which is lovely, because Mr Te Whare loved her to the hill. - (MAN CALLS KARANGA) - We've arrived to the final destination, to the Waikarakia Urupa. - (KARANGA CONTINUES) - Upon our arrival, all emotions are on display. - Haramai te toki! Haumi e! Hui e! - ALL: Taike e! - This is the final time ` this is finality for the family as they commit his body to the earth, back to Papatuanuku. (GENTLE MUSIC) SPEAKS TE REO MAORI: Captions were made with the support of NZ On Air.