COME ON, LET'S GO SKIING. UH, I WANT TO, BUT... BUT WHAT? WHAT'S HOLDING YOU BACK? (BABY CRYING) WYATT? HE MUST BE PRETTY SPECIAL... FOR YOU TO GIVE UP EVERYTHING. WYATT: MAMA! WYATT: MAMA! IT'S OK. IT'S OK, IT'S OK, IT'S OK. SENTIO ALIQUOS TOGATOS CONTRA ME CONSPIRARE. AT LAST, WE HAVE FOUND HIM. (FOOTSTEPS) I THINK SHE'S UPSTAIRS. OW! I JUST GOT A NECK SPASM. DON'T DROP THE BAG. SHE'LL HEAR YOU. THANKS FOR YOUR CONCERN. ARE YOU OK? YEAH. IT JUST, SOMETIMES IT FLARES UP UNDER STRESS. OH, WOW. WITH WHAT YOU GUYS DO, I'M SURPRISED IT DOESN'T FLARE UP ALL THE TIME. IT'S NOT THE DEMONS, IT'S THIS BIRTHDAY STUFF. ESPECIALLY PIPER'S. I ALWAYS SCREW UP THE SURPRISE. I'LL TAKE THESE TO THE KITCHEN. PHOEBE: OH, THANKS. PLUS I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M GONNA GET HER, AND OBVIOUSLY TIME IS RUNNING OUT. PAIGE, I TOLD YOU YOU COULD COME IN ON THE DINNER WITH ME. I DON'T MIND. I APPRECIATE THAT, BUT I DON'T WANT TO JUMP ON YOUR BANDWAGON. I'M GONNA DO MY OWN THING. WELL, BEING A MOM, I CAN TELL YOU THAT A NICE, NORMAL DINNER WITH FRIENDS AND FAMILY IS THE PERFECT GIFT. ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU GUYS DON'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE. NO, THE PERFECT GIFT ACTUALLY DOESN'T EXIST ANYMORE. DO TELL? HEY, DO THESE GO? UH, NO. GRAB THOSE 2. OK. IT'S A CHARM BRACELET... THAT MOM GAVE PIPER AND PIPER LOVED IT, BUT THEN PRUE LOST IT. WHY DON'T WE JUST CAST A-- A LOST-AND-FOUND SPELL? I TRIED. IT DIDN'T WORK. IS JASON COMING TO THE PARTY? NO. HE'S IN SOME FARAWAY LAND, LIKE ZIMBABWE OR SOMETHING. MUST BE FUN. YOU GUYS TRAVEL ALL OVER THE WORLD TOGETHER. YEAH. IT'S--IT'S NICE. I JUST-- I REALLY MISS HOME. I'M HAPPY TO BE HERE RIGHT NOW. WHAT ABOUT YOUR BEAU? IS HE COMING? RICHARD? NO. HE'S, UH, KIND OF GOT A BIT OF A PROBLEM WITH MAGIC. OR IT HAS A PROBLEM WITH HIM. DARRYL: HE DOESN'T LIKE IT? NO. MAGIC JUST DOESN'T LIKE HIM. IT'S A LONG STORY. SO IT'S JUST US, THEN? UH, WHAT ABOUT LEO? YEAH, WE KIND OF THOUGHT THAT THAT WAS INAPPROPRIATE. (DOOR CLOSES UPSTAIRS, FOOTSTEPS) THAT'S HER. OUT! OUT! HURRY! HURRY! WE'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW. GO! PAIGE, THE GROCERIES. HEY. HOW'S THAT SURPRISE PARTY GOING? OOH. WHAT DO YOU MEAN, SURPRISE PARTY? THERE'S NO SURPRISE PARTY. JUST DO ME A FAVOUR AND DON'T INVITE GREG OR ANY OTHER GUYS, FOR THAT MATTER, BECAUSE I'M DONE WITH THEM. I'M SORRY? IT'S KIND OF AN EPIPHANY I HAD, UM, RIGHT AFTER I VANQUISHED A DEMON IN WYATT'S ROOM. WAIT. EXCUSE ME? YOU KNOW, AN EPIPHANY. A REVELATION. I KNOW ABOUT THE EPIPHANY. WHAT DO YOU MEAN, A DEMON? PAIGE: OK, WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL US? WELL, I DIDN'T WANT TO BOTHER YOU. IT'S NO BIG DEAL. I BLEW HIM UP. HE'S GONE. OK, DO YOU KNOW THAT EVERY TIME YOU SAY THAT THEY COME BACK WITH A VENGEANCE? KISS OF DEATH. IT DOESN'T MATTER, BECAUSE I'M ON IT FULL-TIME NOW. I'M ACTUALLY THINKING OF SELLING THE CLUB, 'CAUSE I HAVE A NEW MISSION IN LIFE, AND IT'S ALL BECOME VERY CLEAR TO ME. WOULD YOU CARE TO ELABORATE? DO YOU GUYS KNOW THAT WYATT CALLED ME MAMA? HE DID? OH, HIS FIRST WORD. RIGHT AFTER HE WAS ATTACKED. I DON'T THINK I'M GONNA BE PUTTING THAT IN HIS BABY BOOK. OK, BACK TO GIVING UP GUYS... IT'S KIND OF FREEING, ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW, NOT HAVING TO PLAY THE DATING GAME. IT WAS JUST A BIG WASTE OF TIME FOR ME ANYWAY. I MEAN, I GAVE IT MY BEST SHOT, I DID, BUT IT JUST DIDN'T WORK OUT FOR ME. OK, THAT IS COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS. YOU'VE BEEN SINGLE FOR 6 MONTHS. NO, THAT'S FATE. IT'S MY FATE, AND I ACCEPT IT. APPARENTLY, YOU ONLY GET ONE SOULMATE IN A LIFETIME, SO I GUESS LEO WAS MINE. AND NOW I'M READY TO DEVOTE MY LIFE TO PROTECTING AND RAISING WYATT. WELL, WHAT ABOUT SEX? WELL, YOU KNOW, I'M THE MOTHER OF ONE OF THE MOST MAGICAL CREATURES EVER. SEX RATHER PALES IN COMPARISON, DON'T YOU THINK? SHE DOESN'T NEED A PARTY, SHE NEEDS AN INTERVENTION. (SIGHS) (THUNDER) HE LED US LONG AGO. AND ONCE HE RETURNS, HE WILL LEAD US AGAIN AND WILL REWARD YOU FOR YOUR UNWAVERING FAITH. ACOLYTES: DENADO Y SENTIO. HELP US TO CLEANSE HIM OF THE POISON THAT HAS CORRUPTED HIM. TURN HIM THAT HE MIGHT LOWER HIS GUARD, SO THAT WE MAY RETURN HIM TO THE FOLD, TO HIS DESTINY. AAH! AAH! OK, PIPER COULDN'T FIND THE DEMON IN THE BOOK. ANY LUCK UP HERE? PAIGE: UH, ACTUALLY, I'M WORKING ON SOMETHING ELSE. A VANQUISHING POTION? NO. A BIRTHDAY PRESENT. A BIRTHDAY PRESENT. PAIGE, YOU'RE NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO FIND THE CHARM BRACELET. TRUST ME. THIS WILL BE EVEN BETTER. THE PERFECT GIFT. OK, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I FIGURE PIPER HAS NO LOVE IN HER LIFE RIGHT NOW, SO I THINK SHE NEEDS A LITTLE LOVE BACK IN HER LIFE. OK, SO YOU'RE MAKING A LOVE POTION? NO. I'M MAKING A LOVE MACHINE. I AM MAKING THE PERFECT MAN. WAIT. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? ARE YOU--ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? NO. I DON'T THINK I AM. LISTEN. WE'VE CONJURED MAGICAL BEINGS BEFORE, SO, YOU KNOW, HEY, WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL? THE BIG DEAL IS THEY ALWAYS COME BACK TO BITE US IN THE ASS. NO, NO, NO, NO. THIS ONE WON'T. HE'S JUST GONNA BE AROUND FOR HER BIRTHDAY FROM MIDNIGHT TO MIDNIGHT. PAIGE, WE CAN'T JUST CONJURE UP A SEX TOY. LISTEN. I FIGURE MAGIC OWES PIPER. IT HAS TAKEN AWAY THE LOVE OF HER LIFE, AND NOW IT'S THREATENING TO TAKE AWAY LOVE FROM THE REST OF HER LIFE. LOOK, I GET WYATT IS SUPER IMPORTANT, ALL RIGHT? I DO GET THAT. BUT--HEH--I THINK THIS COULD BE FOR THE GREATER GOOD. MM-HMM. OK, LET'S WRITE DOWN SOME QUALITIES. QUALITIES? WHAT DO YOU MEAN, QUALITIES? YOU KNOW, QUALITIES FOR THE PERFECT MAN. OH, OK. WELL, I THINK SHE WOULD WANT SOMEONE THAT, UM, LIVES NEARBY, YOU KNOW, AND DOESN'T TRAVEL A LOT. YEAH, WELL, I WOULD WRITE DOWN SOMETHING ABOUT SOMEBODY WHO I COULD DO MAGIC IN FRONT OF, BUT THESE ARE QUALITIES THAT YOU AND I WOULD WANT, NOT QUALITIES THAT PIPER WOULD NECESSARILY WANT. RIGHT. OK, UM... I THINK SHE WANTS, YOU KNOW, A STRONG MAN, BUT SOMEONE THAT'S NOT AFRAID TO SHOW HIS SENSITIVE SIDE. SENSITIVE, BUT NOT A WUSS BAG. YEAH, AND SOMEONE THAT IS A GOOD LISTENER. OK. GOOD COOK. HANDY AROUND THE HOUSE. GOOD WITH KIDS. GETS THE WHOLE "NORMAL LIFE" THING. HAS A REALLY BIG... PAIGE. UH! IS THIS THE PERFECT GUY OR WHAT? ALL RIGHT. THROW IT IN. (CAULDRON BUBBLING) HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PROTECT WYATT IF YOU DON'T TELL ME WHEN A DEMON ATTACKS HIM TILL HOURS LATER? BECAUSE, CHRIS, I'M TAKING CARE OF IT. THAT'S FINE, BUT WHAT HAPPENS IF THIS DEMON WAS THE ONE? THE ONE WHO WAS AFTER WYATT? THE REASON WHY I CAME BACK? WELL, THEN YOU'RE IN LUCK BECAUSE I BLEW HIM UP. NOT TO MENTION-- HOW MANY DEMONS HAVE YOU SAID THAT ABOUT SO FAR? PIPER, I'VE JUST GOT WYATT'S BEST INTEREST IN MIND. SO DO I. DEMON'S NOT IN HERE. WHAT'S IT LOOK LIKE? TALL, ROBED, WITH A METAL ROD THINGY. REALLY? WELL, THAT NARROWS IT DOWN. IF ANOTHER ONE SHOWS UP, I'LL BE HERE. THAT'S JUST MY POINT, PIPER. WHAT IF YOU'RE NOT HERE? WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU'RE ON A DATE WITH THE FIREMAN OR WHOEVER ELSE YOU'RE SEEING THIS WEEK? LOOK, CHRIS, I DON'T WANT TO GO INTO IT, BUT I'M NOT GONNA BE OUT ON A DATE WITH THE FIREMAN OR ANYBODY ELSE FOR THAT MATTER ANYTIME SOON SO THAT I CAN FOCUS MORE ON WYATT. W-WHAT? DID I STUTTER? PIPER, YOU CAN'T GIVE UP ON LOVE... EVER. WHY NOT? BECAUSE YOU JUST CAN'T, THAT'S WHY. IT'S NOT NATURAL. LOOK, ALL I'M SAYING IS YOU DON'T HAVE TO MAKE THAT TYPE OF SACRIFICE TO PROTECT WYATT. THAT'S WHY I'M HERE. WELL, YOU WEREN'T HERE EARLIER, WERE YOU? LOOK, THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS RIGHT NOW IS WHAT'S BEST FOR WYATT. THIS IS NOT WHAT'S BEST FOR WYATT, PIPER. HOW DO YOU KNOW? BECAUSE I'VE SEEN THE FUTURE, AND THIS ISN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN. SO, WHAT IS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN? COME ON, YOU KNOW I CAN'T ANSWER THAT. WELL, SINCE YOU'RE SENT FROM THE FUTURE TO CHANGE IT, MAYBE THIS IS ONE OF THE THINGS THAT NEEDS TO BE CHANGED. NO, IT'S NOT. BELIEVE ME, IT'S NOT. SHH! (SIGHS) WHO LEFT THIS? LOOK, IF YOU'RE SO CONCERNED ABOUT PROTECTING WYATT, THERE'S OTHER WAYS TO GO ABOUT DOING IT, YOU KNOW? LIKE WHAT? LIKE LETTING LEO TAKE HIM UP THERE FOR A WHILE. OR... YOU COULD ALWAYS BIND HIS POWERS. LEO LEFT ME A BIRTHDAY PRESENT. HOW SWEET. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT WHAT I SAID? ABOUT WHAT? ABOUT BINDING WYATT'S POWERS? NO WAY. WHY NOT? NOBODY WOULD EVER BE AFTER HIM, AND YOU'D HAVE YOUR LIFE BACK. BUT THAT WOULD BE SELFISH OF ME, WOULDN'T IT, TO PUT MY NEEDS BEFORE HIS DESTINY? I'M NOT BEING A MARTYR, CHRIS. REALLY, I'M NOT. I JUST GET IT NOW. I'M THE MOTHER OF A VERY SPECIAL CHILD THAT IF I DO MY JOB RIGHT, HE'S GONNA GROW UP TO DO VERY SPECIAL THINGS. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN THAT? SWEETIE, YOU GO BACK TO SLEEP... AND I WILL BE RIGHT BACK. (EXPLOSION) OK. I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE. ONE MORE THING-- MAGICAL PHEROMONES. MAGICAL PHEROMONES? YEAH, SEE? IT'S JUST ONE THING TO GIVE HIM AN EXTRA SHOT, TO HELP PIPER BE A LITTLE BIT MORE RECEPTIVE SINCE HE'S ONLY GOT A DAY. I HOPE WE'RE DOING THE RIGHT THING. I HOPE THIS DOESN'T BACKFIRE, YOU KNOW? I DON'T THINK IT WILL. IF THIS WERE A DATE, HONEY, THIS WOULD BE THE MARTINI. (CLOCK CHIMING) OK... BOTH: A PERFECT MAN WE SUMMON NOW, ANOTHER WAY WE DON'T KNOW HOW, TO MAKE OUR SISTER SEE THE LIGHT, SOMEWHERE OUT THERE IS MR. RIGHT. HELLO. BOTH: PERFECT. HI. OK. SO, REMEMBER, SHE'S GONNA FREAK. BIG TIME. SO YOU JUST GET AS CLOSE AS YOU CAN TO HER... GET REALLY, REALLY, REALLY CLOSE. AND YOU JUST LET THOSE PHEROMONES DO THEIR MAGIC. SO YOU CAN DO YOUR MAGIC-- LADIES, LADIES, PLEASE. YOU CREATED ME TO KNOW EXACTLY WHAT PIPER WANTS. DON'T WORRY. MMM? MMM... MMM... I HAVE A QUESTION FOR YOU. HUH? SINCE WHEN IS PIPER INTO HOT LATIN TYPES? SINCE I PUT IN THE HOT LATIN TYPE INGREDIENT. OH, PHOEBE. WHAT, ARE YOU COMPLAINING? HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PIPER. (GASPS) EGGS BENEDICT, EASY YOKE, STEAMED ASPARAGUS, FRESH FRUIT, ORANGE JUICE, NO PULP. HOW DO I DO? PHOEBE! PAIGE! YEAH? WH-WHAT'S GOING ON? WHO IS THIS? WELL, UH, THIS IS YOUR BIRTHDAY PRESENT... HEH HEH... FROM ME! ALTHOUGH, YOU KNOW, PHOEBE HELPED. THE BREAKFAST? NO, THE MUCHACHO. (CHUCKLING) WAIT. YOU...YOU... YOU...HIRED A GUY FOR MY BIRTHDAY? NO, WE WOULD NEVER HIRE A GUY FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY. WE MADE HIM. MAGICALLY. UH, YOU KNOW WHAT? THIS IS PAIGE'S PRESENT FOR YOU. MINE'S THE SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY. I KNOW. YOU'RE PRETTY MAD, AREN'T YOU? YOU-- TRAITOR. I KNOW WE SHOULD HAVE USED MORE PHEROMONES! HEY. YOU. VAMONOS. OK. PIPER, WAIT! NO! NOT UNTIL YOU SEND HIM BACK TO WHEREVER THE HELL YOU CONJURED HIM FROM. WE CAN'T, NOT UNTIL YOUR BIRTHDAY'S OVER. YEAH, SO WHY NOT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF HIM WHILE YOU CAN? I MEAN, FIGURATIVELY SPEAKING, OF COURSE. AH, HELL, LITERALLY. IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYS DID THIS. DID YOU NOT HEAR ME YESTERDAY? NO, WE DID, LOUD AND CLEAR. YEAH, WE JUST WANTED YOU TO CHANGE YOUR MIND. SO YOU WHIPPED UP A MAGICAL GIGOLO? OH, CRIMINY, JUST GIVE HIM A CHANCE. HOW COULD YOU RESIST HIM? DID YOU LOOK AT HIM? THIS IS LIKE SOMETHING WE WOULD DO YEARS AGO BEFORE WE KNEW BETTER. BUT NOW WE DO KNOW BETTER. AT LEAST WE'RE SUPPOSED TO. YOU KNOW WHAT? DESPERATE TIMES CALL FOR DESPERATE MEASURES. (GASPS) WHOA! WHOA! I'M SORRY. ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? YEAH. NO. I'M PISSED, REMEMBER? ARE YOU WEARING COLOGNE? NO. YOU DON'T LIKE COLOGNE. NO, I DON'T, DO I? BUT WHAT DOES SHE LIKE? WELL, SHE LIKES... LONG WALKS ON THE BEACH... SHOPPING AT THE EMBARCADERO... LUNCHING AT ZUNI... DEEP TISSUE MASSAGES... (GIGGLING) WELL... THAT--THAT--YEAH-- THAT SOUNDS GREAT, BUT-- SO, WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR? NO! I CAN'T 'CAUSE, UH, THE DEMON. WE'LL TAKE CARE OF THE DEMON. IT'S DONE. WELL, WHAT ABOUT WYATT? I CAN'T JUST LEAVE HIM. CAN'T WE TAKE HIM WITH US? YOU KNOW, MAYBE GO TO THE FAIR... OR, PERHAPS, THE ZOO, HMM? I'LL GET DRESSED. I'LL GET HIM... UNLESS YOU DON'T WANT ME TO. NO, NO. YOU CAN GET HIM. OK. EXCUSE ME, GIRLS. - YEAH. BYE. - BYE. OH... COOL YOUR JETS, LADY. IT'S FOR PIPER. RIGHT. STAY ON TARGET. YEAH. OH, FINALLY. I'VE BEEN CALLING YOU FOR HOURS, MAN. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? - WHAT'S UP? - WHAT'S UP? YOUR SON WAS ATTACKED YESTERDAY. - WHAT? - DON'T WORRY. HE'S FINE. PIPER VANQUISHED THE DEMON. WHO WAS HE? THAT'S THE PROBLEM. HE'S NOT IN THE BOOK. WELL, WE HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHO HE IS IN CASE THERE'S ANOTHER ATTEMPT. ON THAT POINT, I HAVE A RADICAL SUGGESTION, A WAY OF PROTECTING WYATT FROM ANY AND ALL FUTURE ATTEMPTS. I'M LISTENING. WE GET THE SISTERS TO BIND WYATT'S POWERS. HEH...NO WAY. BINDING WYATT'S POWERS SOLVES BOTH PROBLEMS. NO. WYATT WASN'T BROUGHT INTO THIS WORLD TO BE BOUND. I CAN'T CONDONE THAT... UNLESS THERE'S SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME. ALL RIGHT, THEN WE NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHO'S AFTER WYATT. OK. HOW? RIGHT HERE... ABOVE THE DIN OF THE CITY. THAT'S WHY I COME UP HERE. JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES, RELY ON YOUR INNER SENSES. (SIGHS) LISTEN TO THE WIND... (DEMONIC WHISPERS INCREASING IN VOLUME) (PANTING) AAH! AAH! WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF VOLUNTEERS. IF WE CAN'T TURN THE MODEL, IF WE CAN'T GET IT TO LOWER ITS GUARD, WE WON'T BE ABLE TO TURN THE CHILD, EITHER. I FIND YOUR LACK OF FAITH DISTURBING. IT IS BECAUSE OF MY FAITH THAT I RAISE THE CONCERN, YOUR EMINENCE. THE ACOLYTES GROW RESTLESS, THE SEARCH HAS BEEN LONG. WITHOUT REASSURANCE THAT HE CAN BE CONVERTED, THEIR EVIL MAY SPLINTER OFF, SCATTER. WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST? ANOTHER ENCOUNTER WITH THE CHILD-- TO READ HIS MIND AGAIN, TO BETTER SEE HOW HIS MORALS HAVE BEEN TWISTED. I OFFER MYSELF TO THE CAUSE. YOUR SACRIFICE WILL BE REWARDED. BUT THE WITCHES WILL BE PREPARED THIS TIME, WHICH MEANS YOU'LL HAVE TO GO IN AS SOMEONE THEY KNOW... TRUST. HIM. FLY TO NEW YORK RIGHT NOW? JASON, OH, YOU'RE SO CUTE. I WOULD LOVE TO, BUT-- BUT SHE'S BUSY SETTING A DEMONIC ALARM SYSTEM. HEH HEH. NO. SHE SAID WE'RE BUSY WATCHING A MECHANIC SET UP AN ALARM SYSTEM. YOU KNOW, US GIRLS CAN NEVER BE TOO CAREFUL. BABY, CAN I CALL YOU BACK LATER? OK, I LOVE YOU, TOO. BYE. CUTE, VERY CUTE. JUST TRYING TO HELP OUT. WHAT, ARE YOU TRYING TO BLOW MY SECRET? WELL, YOU SAID YOURSELF YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TELL HIM SOONER OR LATER. YEAH, BUT I WANT TO BE THE ONE TELL HIM, NOT AT&T. HEY, WHY ARE YOU IN SUCH A GOOD MOOD? WELL, IT'S NICE TO PRACTISE MAGIC WITHOUT FEELING GUILTY. (SIGHS) GUESS WE ALL HAVE GUY PROBLEMS, RIGHT? WHERE'S PIPER? UH, SHE'S OUT. WHY? BECAUSE WE KNOW WHO ATTACKED WYATT, AND WE THINK THEY'RE GONNA ATTACK AGAIN. WHO? A DEMONIC CULT CALLED THE ORDER. THEY USED TO BE THE MOST POWERFUL FORCE UNTIL THEIR LEADER WAS VANQUISHED. AND GUESS WHAT? THEY THINK HE'S BEEN REINCARNATED. WYATT? HE'S YOUNG ENOUGH TO BE TURNED EVIL, ESPECIALLY BY THEM. WHERE IS WYATT? IS HE WITH PIPER? (DOOR OPENS) PIPER: ANYBODY HOME? A LITTLE HELP HERE, PLEASE? WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? WELL, EVERYWHERE. ACTUALLY, FIRST WE WENT SHOPPING, AND THEN WE WENT FOR A BOAT RIDE, AND THEN WE HAD A PICNIC IN THE PARK, AND THEN WE STOPPED AT THE FAIR. CHRIS: PIPER? HUH? WHERE'S WYATT? OH, HE'S COMING. MR. RIGHT: ` IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT ` ` CLAP YOUR HANDS ` ` IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT ` ` CLAP YOUR HANDS ` HELLO. WHO ARE YOU? UH, HE'S--HE'S, YOU KNOW, JUST A DATE. PAIGE: A GUY. YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T HAVE A NAME YET, DO YOU? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, HE DOESN'T HAVE A NAME? WHY NOT CALL ME DAVID? YOU'VE ALWAYS LIKED THAT NAME, NO? NO--I MEAN, YES. ISN'T HE PERFECT? WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON HERE? YOU DON'T HAVE TO FEEL THREATENED BY ME, LEO. NO ONE WOULD EVER REPLACE YOU IN WYATT'S EYES, AND PIPER WOULDN'T WANT ANYONE TO. PHOEBE... YEAH. OK. WHY DON'T YOU GUYS PUT WYATT DOWN FOR A NAP? I'M SURE HE'S REALLY TIRED FROM ALL THIS EXCITEMENT. COME ON. OK. ` IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT ` ` CLAP YOUR HANDS ` ` DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA ` AND DON'T FORGET TO TURN OFF THE DEMONIC ALARM SYSTEM. YOU KNOW, IN CASE THE BABY MISTAKES HIM FOR A... DEMON. ALL RIGHT, FINE! SO I MADE HIM OUT OF MY OWN LITTLE BREW. YOU WHAT?! PIPER WAS GONNA GIVE UP ON LOVE, ON HER BIRTHDAY, NONETHELESS. SO YOU CONJURED A MAN? NO! NOT JUST A MAN. THE PERFECT MAN. SEE, HE'S SOMEBODY WHO KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT SHE WANTS, AND HE'S JUST GONNA BE HERE LONG ENOUGH TO STRAIGHTEN HER OUT. 24 HOURS. THAT'S IT. IT'S GREAT, RIGHT? YEAH, NOT EVEN 24. MORE LIKE 8, AND THEN, SADLY, HE GOES POOF. YEAH. YOU DON'T WANT HER TO LIVE LIFE WITHOUT LOVE, DO YOU, LEO? WE'LL TALK ABOUT THIS LATER AFTER WE DEAL WITH THE ORDER. IS THIS A BAD TIME? I JUST WANTED TO DROP THIS OFF. DARRYL, WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST WAIT TILL DINNER? DINNER? ACTUALLY, THIS IS FOR WYATT, SO HE HAS A LITTLE SOMETHING TO OPEN UP, TOO. OH, THAT'S SO SWEET. SHEILA'S IDEA, ACTUALLY. MIND IF I GIVE IT TO HIM? OH, SURE. YEAH. THEY'RE UPSTAIRS. THANKS. DON'T YOU THINK MAYBE WE SHOULD CANCEL THE DINNER PARTY? NO. DARRYL, RIGHT? RIGHT. HOW'S IT GOIN'? HI. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? OH, I JUST BROUGHT THE LITTLE GUY A PRESENT. OH, THAT'S REALLY SWEET, BUT WE JUST PUT HIM DOWN FOR A NAP. I'LL SNEAK IT IN, SO HE CAN SEE IT WHEN HE WAKES UP. HE'LL NEVER KNOW I WAS HERE. OK. SHH! NO PROBLEM. (CLICK) WHAT'S UP? WE NEED TO TALK. WYATT MAY BE IN DANGER. (STATIC ON BABY MONITOR) WHY IS IT DOING THAT? YOU STAY HERE. (CRYING) IS HE OK? YOU'RE OK. DID HE HURT HIM? OH. NO, I THINK HE'S OK. (THUNDER) SUCCESS? WE SHALL SEE. HE'S READY TO COME HOME. PHOEBE: DARRYL? HE'S OK. HE SAID THEY DIDN'T GET ANYWHERE NEAR HIM. OH, THANK GOD. MY QUESTION IS, HOW'D THEY EVEN KNOW TO IMPERSONATE HIM? THEY MUST HAVE BEEN WATCHING YOU TO SEE WHO YOU TRUSTED AND LET NEAR HIM. THAT'S REALLY CREEPY. CHRIS: WELL, IT'S GONNA GET A LOT CREEPIER IF WE DON'T STOP THEM FROM GETTING TO WYATT. WE MIGHT HAVE A THOUGHT ABOUT THAT. WE? YEAH. WELL, WE'VE BEEN TALKING, AND I THINK WE NEED TO GIVE CHRIS' IDEA ANOTHER CHANCE. PHOEBE: WHAT IDEA? ABOUT BINDING WYATT'S POWERS. PHOEBE AND PAIGE: WHAT?! WELL, I'M JUST SAYING WE SHOULD CONSIDER IT. I MEAN, IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT, IT MAKES SENSE. YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS. ACTUALLY, SHE'S NEVER BEEN MORE SERIOUS. EXCUSE ME, I WAS TALKING TO HER. THIS DOESN'T SOUND LIKE YOU, PIPER. DOESN'T IT? PIPER WANTS TO PROTECT HER SON. SHE WANTS A NORMAL LIFE. THIS WAY, SHE CAN HAVE BOTH. HEY, THAT WAS MY ARGUMENT. WELL, THAT'S A GOOD ONE. NO, IT'S NOT "A GOOD ONE." THAT'S A BAD ONE-- A VERY, VERY BAD ONE-- ONE THAT'S BEEN DISCUSSED AND DISCARDED ALREADY. YEAH, BUT THAT WAS BEFORE A DEMONIC CULT STARTED TARGETING HIM. I MEAN, THIS COULD BE-- OH, WHAT, JUST ANOTHER BIG, BAD, EVIL THING THAT'S COMING AFTER HIM? YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. WE GOT IT. IT STILL ISN'T A GOOD ENOUGH REASON. PIPER THINKS IT IS. HEY, BUDDY, DON'T FORGET WHO MADE YOU. (CLEARS THROAT) THAT'S RIGHT. YOU DID MAKE HIM, DIDN'T YOU? PHOEBE: PIPER, I DON'T UNDERSTAND. YESTERDAY, YOU WERE WILLING TO GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR WYATT'S FUTURE. WHY THIS NOW? WELL, YOU SHOULD KNOW. YOU'RE THE ONE THAT, UM, SHOWED ME WHAT I REALLY WANTED AND REALLY NEED. SHE'S GOT US THERE. YEAH, WELL, IT DOESN'T MATTER, 'CAUSE IT'S GONNA TAKE THE POWER OF THREE TO BIND SOMEONE AS POWERFUL AS WYATT, AND I'M NOT GONNA SUPPORT IT. NEITHER AM I. WELL, THEN, WE HAVE A PROBLEM, BECAUSE I AM. ALL RIGHT. WHY DON'T WE ALL JUST TAKE A DEEP BREATH, OK? LEO, WHY DON'T YOU ORB WYATT UP THERE UNTIL WE CAN FIGURE THIS THING OUT? GLADLY. DO YOU MIND? NO. PLEASE. COME ON. UHH! ALL RIGHT. AND WHY DON'T WE--DAVID, RIGHT? DAVID. WHY DON'T YOU COME WITH ME AND LET THE GIRLS TALK ALONE FOR A MINUTE? SO, YOU'VE GOT QUITE AN INFLUENCE ON PIPER, DON'T YOU? WELL, I JUST REFLECT WHAT SHE WANTS. INTERESTING. SO THEY WHAT? JUST WROTE DOWN WHAT SHE WANTED, AND THAT WAS THAT? I DON'T KNOW. I GUESS. HUH. LET'S SEE. UHH! WHAT WERE WE JUST TALKING ABOUT? UH...PAIGE AND WHAT SHE LOOKS FOR IN A MAN. PAIGE. SHE WANTS A MAN WHO SHE CAN OPENLY PRACTISE MAGIC AROUND... ONE SHE WON'T FEEL SUPPRESSED BY. GOOD. VERY GOOD. AND... WHAT ABOUT PHOEBE? PHOEBE. SHE WANTS THE SAME THING... PLUS SHE WANTS HIM TO BE AVAILABLE TO LIVE NEAR HER HOME. THAT'S WHAT SHE WANTS. THIS POTION PACKS A HELL OF A PUNCH, DOESN'T IT? OF COURSE, IN ORDER FOR THEM TO BE WITH THE PERFECT MAN IS THAT THEY'RE HAPPY WITH EACH OTHER FIRST, AND THE ONLY WAY THEY CAN BE HAPPY WITH EACH OTHER FIRST IS BY... AGREEING TO BIND WYATT'S POWERS. (SIGHS) MMM... HUH. DAVID: UHH! PHEROMONES. EH, WHAT THE HELL. (CLATTER) THIS IS MY SON WE'RE TALKING ABOUT. PIPER, YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO REASON. PHOEBE, HIS LIFE IS IN JEOPARDY, AND BINDING HIS POWERS MAY BE THE ONLY WAY TO SAVE HIM. THAT'S ALL THAT'S SAVED HIM. PAIGE, PLEASE HELP ME. WELL, I THINK THAT--OW! OH, HERE. ALLOW ME. MMM...JUST RELAX, OK? (SIGHS) HUH. YOU KEEP ALL THE TENSION IN YOUR SHOULDERS. YOU'RE RIGHT. I LOVE YOUR COLOGNE. DAVID: MM-HMM. HEY, THAT'S MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT. ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT. HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON? I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA KEEP HIM OCCUPIED. I WAS, BUT THEN I FIGURED OUT HOW TO BREAK THE IMPASSE BETWEEN YOU 3, SO... REALLY? HOW? UH... HEY! OH. OHH... (WHISPERS) DON'T WORRY. I'M HERE FOR YOU, PHOEBE... NOT OFF TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS IN SOME FARAWAY LAND. YEAH. I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT. SO, WHAT DO WE THINK ABOUT BINDING WYATT'S POWERS? DARRYL: KNOCK, KNOCK! SHEILA: SURPRISE! OH, HEY, YOU GUYS NEED THIS? FOUND THIS BY THE DOOR. PHOEBE: YES, WE NEED IT BY THE DOOR. DON'T TOUCH OUR CRYSTALS. AT LEAST WE KNOW IT'S REALLY DARRYL. HEY. OH, AND WHO'S HE? OH! THIS IS DAVID. HI. ACTUALLY, GUYS, THE DINNER'S BEEN CANCELLED. SORRY. WHY? THE GIRLS STILL WANT TO PARTY. DON'T YOU? - YEAH! - YEAH! - WHOO HOO! BUT THE DINNER HASN'T EVEN BEEN MADE. OH, I CAN FIX THAT. ON PIPER'S DAY, SET THIS TABLE WITH ALL THE FAVOURS YOU ARE ABLE. AH! NOT BAD, HUH? NO! NO! THIS ISN'T RIGHT! THIS ISN'T WHAT THEY WANT! HEY, IF IT MAKES THEM HAPPY, IT'S ALL I WANT. COME ON, HAVE A SEAT. BUT WHAT ABOUT WYATT? ANYONE? THE CHILD... HE'S GONE. CAN YOU SENSE HIM? NO, BUT THEY WON'T KEEP HIM AWAY FOR LONG. WE'LL WAIT. SO, HOW LONG HAVE YOU KNOWN THE GIRLS? 14-15 HOURS, I GUESS. DID YOU SAY "HOURS"? MM-HMM. OH, YEAH. I MADE HIM... MAGICALLY. ACTUALLY, WE BOTH MADE HIM. FOR MY BIRTHDAY. HMM. HELL OF A GIFT. YEAH. WE JUST WANTED TO REMIND PIPER OF THE IMPORTANCE OF LOVE. LOVE? A SPIRITUAL, EMOTIONAL, DEEP-IN-YOUR-HEART LOVE-- THE KIND YOU SHOULD NEVER, EVER STOP SEARCHING FOR, PIPER. I KNOW. YOU'RE RIGHT. I KNOW. YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE IT, TOO. I PROMISE... YOUR NORMAL LIFE. PSST! HMM? WHAT ABOUT ME? YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TO HIDE YOUR SECRET ANYMORE. I UNDERSTAND YOU. I KNOW YOU DO. WHAT ABOUT MY DINNER? MAGICAL, PAIGE. JUST THE WAY I LIKE IT. MMM! THEY'RE REALLY GOOD PEAS. DAVID: MMM! AHEM! EXCUSE ME. WYATT, ANYONE? (WHISPERS) LATER. IS THIS SOME KIND OF DEMONIC THING? NO. IT'S SOME SORT OF MESSED-UP THING. MAYBE WE SHOULD GO. GOOD IDEA. HEY, Y'ALL NEED TO MAKE YOUR OWN PRESENT. HEY, OFF OF THE LAP! PAIGE: UHH! UHH! UHH! UHH! (GASPS) OH, I SEE! YOU'RE GONNA PLAY WITH CAKE NOW! CAKE! AAH! HEY, GIRLS, GIRLS. COME ON! THERE'S PLENTY OF ME TO GO AROUND. OH, YOU-- AAH! WELL, UH... THANKS FOR DINNER. PBBBT! SHEILA: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! AAH! UHH! HOW THE HELL ARE YOU MAKING THEM HAPPY IF THEY'RE FIGHTING? GET THEM TO BIND WYATT'S POWERS NOW! (GASPS) ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS? WHAT YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING IS TO GET ALONG, AND THIS WILL HELP YOU DO THAT. I'M PRETTY SURE WHAT WE WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING IS A GOOD DRY CLEANER. LEO. YEAH. WHAT HAPPENED? YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW. WE'RE BINDING WYATT'S POWERS. WHAT? WE ALREADY DECIDED. LEO: YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS. HE'S ONE OF US NOW. LISTEN TO ME. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? PHOEBE: THE PHEROMONES WORE OFF... PIPER: RIGHT AFTER THEY TOOK MY SON! YOU DON'T SERIOUSLY BELIEVE THIS IS MY FAULT, DO YOU? OH, RIGHT. SO IT'S JUST A BIG COINCIDENCE WE ALL FELL UNDER MR. RIGHT'S SPELL? AND THEN SUDDENLY WE ALL WANT TO BIND WYATT'S POWERS? YOU SEE, CHRIS, WHAT THEY REALLY WANT IS-- DAVID AND PAIGE: FOR YOU TO LEAVE. I KNEW THAT. THIS IS CRAZY. LEO, TELL THEM. LEO: TELL THEM WHAT? I'M WONDERING THE SAME THING MYSELF. OK. SO WHAT IF I DID? I WAS ONLY TRYING TO PROTECT WYATT. BY TRICKING US? - I HAD TO. - WHY? BECAUSE THE ONLY REASON I CAME HERE IS TO KEEP WYATT FROM TURNING EVIL. TURNING EVIL? DON'T YOU MEAN STOPPING EVIL FROM HURTING HIM? I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D HELP ME IF YOU KNEW THE TRUTH. I KNEW YOU WOULDN'T. THE EVIL FROM THE FUTURE I CAME BACK TO STOP ISN'T A DEMON. IT'S WYATT. YOU'RE LYING. NO, I'M NOT. HE'S GONNA GROW UP AND TERRORISE PEOPLE WITH HIS POWERS, TAKE OVER...KILL, EVEN. WHY SHOULD WE BELIEVE YOU AFTER ALL THE LIES? BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO. NO, CHRIS. WE DON'T, ACTUALLY. FINE. THEN, DON'T. EITHER WAY, WE NEED TO SAVE WYATT NOW, AND I'M THE ONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO DO IT. OH, REALLY? HOW? THE ORDER. THEY USED THEIR POWERS TO TURN HIM, TO REVERSE HIS MORALITY. SEE, HE THINKS BAD IS GOOD NOW AND GOOD IS BAD. THAT'S WHY HIS SHIELD REPELLED YOU. SO? SO WYATT BRINGS HIS SHIELD UP AROUND ME. HE THINKS I'M A THREAT. YEAH, SO DO I. LISTEN TO ME. THEY REVERSED HIS SENSE OF MORALITY. THAT MEANS HIS SHIELD WILL PROTECT HIM FROM YOU BUT NOT FROM ME. PLEASE, I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN SAVE HIM. LET ME HELP. CHRIS, WE DON'T NEED YOUR HELP. I WILL GET MY SON BACK AND WHEN I DO, I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU ANYMORE. I'M SORRY. NIHIL CURO... DE ISTA TUA STULTA. ACOLYTES IN UNISON: RADIX LECTI... RADIX LECTI... BEHOLD, HE HAS RETURNED TO US, TO HIS RIGHTFUL PLACE, TO ONE DAY LEAD US BACK TO-- UHH! YAHH! UHH! YAHH! UHH! HE PROTECTS ME NOW... NOT YOU! AAH! UHH! (PANTING) PICK UP THE SCEPTRE AND POINT IT AT WYATT. TRUST ME. HOW COME HE DIDN'T RAISE HIS SHIELD BACK UP FOR YOU? I DON'T KNOW. LOOKS LIKE HE TRUSTS ME NOW, AT LEAST. GOOD PLACE TO THINK, ISN'T IT? WHAT DO YOU WANT? JUST TO TALK. YOU KNOW, CHRIS, TRUST IS A PRECIOUS COMMODITY. ONCE YOU LOSE IT, IT'S PRETTY HARD TO GET IT BACK. WHERE'D YOU READ THAT, OUT OF A FORTUNE COOKIE? DON'T BE A SMART ASS. IT DOESN'T HELP YOUR CAUSE. MY CAUSE? PRETTY MUCH SCREWED THAT UP, DON'T YOU THINK? I DON'T KNOW. ARE YOU SAYING YOU STILL TRUST ME? IT'S NOT MY TRUST THAT MATTERS. IT'S THE SISTERS. I KNOW. SO WHAT DO I DO? JUST BE STRAIGHT WITH THEM, THAT'S ALL. DON'T MANIPULATE THEM... EVEN IF IT IS FOR THE RIGHT REASON. AND FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH, YES, I DO TRUST YOU. AFTER ALL, YOU SAVED MY SON FROM TURNING EVIL, DIDN'T YOU? FOR NOW. HI. I WAS JUST COMING UP TO FIND YOU. DAVID: I KNOW. YEAH. SEE, THAT'S STILL KIND OF WEIRD TO ME. I KNOW THAT, TOO. (LAUGHS) LISTEN, THANKS FOR CLEANING UP THE MESS. YOU REALLY ARE A PERFECT GUY. MY PLEASURE. (SIGHS) WELL... I ALREADY SAID GOODBYE TO YOUR SISTERS. NOW IT'S YOUR TURN. I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD APOLOGISE OR SOMETHING. WHY? I'M OK WITH WHAT'S ABOUT TO HAPPEN. REALLY. I WAS MADE THAT WAY. WEIRD. DID YOU AT LEAST HAVE A GOOD BIRTHDAY? IT WAS INTERESTING TO SAY THE LEAST. YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT LOVE, PIPER. WE BOTH KNOW THAT. THAT'S ALL YOUR SISTERS WERE TRYING TO TELL YOU. (SIGHS) DON'T EVER STOP DREAMING ABOUT ME. AND NEVER STOP LOOKING FOR LOVE. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PIPER. (WHISPERS) YOU GO TO SLEEP. CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --WWW.NCICAP.ORG-- Captions were made possible with funding from NZ On Air.