(GENTLE JAZZ THEME MUSIC) Captions by Kristin Williams. Captions were made with the support of NZ On Air. www.able.co.nz Copyright Able 2023 - KAIORA: Oh, kia ora. - Kia ora. - Kia ora. - I hear you've come all the way from over the States. - Yes. Yes, indeed. - CHUCKLES: We have. - Wow. - It's so nice to meet you. - The TV show, although it's a documentary series, it actually has a far reach around the world. And so, people will turn up to the funeral home to see us. - I mean, we're fans of the show, and we can only get two seasons on Netflix in the US. - I know. - Yeah. - And so, in some of the places we've been staying, TVNZ shows it. (LAUGHTER) - We've been watching at night. - So we've been binging at night just so we can see more of the show. - Wow. OK. Come through. Part of me feels a little bit odd that we're given a tour around the funeral home. My whanau, we quite love our pork bones and puha, so we might have to take some seats out so we can all fit comfortably in here. - Yeah. (CHUCKLES) - At the same time, I feel that it's educational, but also, I love to share and just give a bit of insight of who we are. Hi, darling. I want you to meet Eric. Oh, sorry. Ryan and Eric. They've come all the way from the state of Michigan. - Hi, Ryan. - What a pleasure to meet you. - Pleasure's mine. Ryan. - Kia ora. - Ryan? - Ryan. - Eric, kia ora. - It's nice to meet you. Kia ora. - Good to meet you too. - Yeah. - Yes. - Welcome to Aotearoa. - Thank you. - Thank you. - After meeting Eric and Ryan for the first time, my first impression of them both was one of, wow, because as they spoke to us, there were little Maori words being dropped in the way through. - He uses the word 'whaea' for Nona. - (CLEARS THROAT) Excuse me. I am not that old. (CHUCKLES) You could call me 'wahine'. (CHUCKLES) - Whaea? - Yes. - She would appreciate that. - (CHUCKLES) Don't you start. - To call somebody whaea is very, very lovely. Not the word I would call her. Many other words, but, heoi ano. - We love all of (CHUCKLES) your interactions and love all of that. But it's also been really personally important to us. So, I mean, it's taught us` It's our first introduction to tikanga Maori. And so, it's been really wonderful to learn through that. - Beautiful. - I was surprised that Ryan knew a bit of reo Maori, most of which he had learned from the show. - I'm the eldest mokopuna. (CHUCKLES) The eldest grandson by grandson. - By quite a bit. - So, on my dad's side, my Chinese grandmother, who we called our, my family, whanau, calls Yin Yin, she passed last year. And in our family and culture, we have our own tikanga and have different practices. - For us to have people do that because of a show they've watched is such a beautiful privilege, for them to trust, to come and share about someone they've loved that we don't know, we've never met, but they just feel like they can come and share that with us. And I think that's very, very beautiful. - Your show and all the beautiful te reo and the tikanga, it helps me understand how special those moments are. - That's so lovely. Thank you. - Yeah, so thank you for that. - Thank you. - For all your mahi and aroha. The way in which tikanga Maori and Maori culture has been shared throughout the ao, the world, is another beautiful blessing as well. We're able to give people an insight into the way we do things as tangata whenua. - All the mokopuna who are able to gather ` we have a big family ` they took her body so that we could all spend some time with her. It was so important for us to help her transition to becoming an ancestor. - I loved how Ryan can relate to our tikanga. He has some tikanga too, and I love that we're able to share that with each other. Eric and Ryan, all the way from Michigan. - From Michigan, yes. - (CHUCKLES) - (CHUCKLES) - Wow. Is there a book? - Yes, I've got plenty. - Our whare is always open, and if we can give of our time, we will. - Oh, thank you. Thank you so much. - All right. Thank you again. - Ka pai. No problems. Take care, eh. - Enjoy your day. - Thank you. Take care. - Kia ora. - Kia ora. - Kia ora. (ANGELIC MUSIC) (POIGNANT MUSIC) - Today in our care, we have Chen Mao-Cai. He passed away from breathing complications, and he's 83 years old. - Gotta make sure we get some gumboots, cos it doesn't look like a very good day tomorrow, apparently. - I reckon. Today Kai's assisting me with dressing Mao-Cai. - Aw, kia ora, matua. Let's give him some nice` Let's dress him bougie. - Yeah. - We would always give that opportunity to the whanau and invite them to dress. But the whanau have requested for the funeral directors to dress Mr Chen. Oh, yeah. That's a lovely shirt. - Mr Chen had formal wear and relaxing wear, but we thought it was right for him to go in his formal wear. - Nothing wrong with wearing track pants too. I prefer to wear track pants. - Oh, so do I. - Knowing that me and Jay are the last ones to dress Mr Chen, it's a privilege and a blessing that we can perform this final act for this loved one. - After we've finished dressing Mr Chen, we'll play some into his casket and do all our final touches and make sure he looks all dapper. And then he'll remain in our care until his service. Oh, very dapper. - Dapper. Very dapper. - So what we'll do is we'll just bring him out. We'll place his head on here first. - On arrival to Manukau Memorial Gardens, we see his immediate family. I notice that there's only a small amount of whanau there. - You could have six people at a service or 300. It's what it means to the family. It's their final farewell, and that's the main thing, really. - (SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE) - The funeral service has started. Although I can't understand every word, I know that the whakaaro there is about Mr Chen and saying goodbye to him. - (WEEPS) My grandparents were heavily involved in raising me and showering me with much love and attention. (SNIFFLES) I still remember sitting in front of him (SNIFFLES) on his motor scooter as he took me to and from kindergarten every day. (SNIFFLES) - I'm feeling for his moko. You know, she has a lot of memories with her poppa. She's sharing her journey she's had with him when they moved here to Aotearoa. So it's beautiful that she can express that today. - (SNIFFLES) He was a loving father to my mother and uncle, and a jolly and doting grandfather to Fung Fung, Kiki and myself. (SNIFFLES) We are already missing him, (SNIFFLES) and he will be in our memories forever. We take comfort (SNIFFLES) in knowing that he goes to be with my grandmother. (SNIFFLES) Gung-Gung, we love you, and hope you are now at peace. - So, Mr Chen's service was quite short and sweet. I think it's all the family wanted ` was just have a little farewell... - Just a little lip here. - ...and get him by his late wife as soon as they could. The family had a moment in silence at the grave. That was their final moments where they could see him. So I think they just wanted to embrace every moment they had. (POIGNANT STRING MUSIC) - (SPEAKS TE REO MAORI) - (HUMS 'THE BIRTHDAY SONG') Today is Tamale's 21st birthday. He turns 21. We wanted to have a little cake and some kai. - I feel like stealing this thigh before it actually goes out on the table. Is that wrong? I'm always kind of doing that, eh. - (PLAYS GUITAR) Man, where is everyone? Like any of our meetings ` birthdays, staff meetings ` (CLEARS THROAT) I asked everyone to be there bang on 2pm. It's just that the food's gonna get cold. - Yeah. - This doesn't eventuate, and this is very normal for us. - Well, we're always late. It's not on purpose. I'm sure everyone was busy, you know. Working. - (PLAYS AND HUMS 'THE BIRTHDAY SONG') - When you hear that guitar going, you know that's your cue to hurry up. - (PLAYS AND HUMS 'THE BIRTHDAY SONG') OK. I might take it up a note. - Not that we had anything against poor Tamale turning 21. That's massive. - # Happy birthday to you. # - But I think everyone was just trying to find the energy to actually get in here, cos, you know, every time Francis says 'kai', it's usually only about three people that come anyway. (CHUCKLES) - Are you fullas near? It's 2 o'clock already. We're ready. Well, we're waiting for youse. - But when he started raising his voice and going... - Mum, can you get the whanau? - Yeah. - ...we're waiting, and he started strumming, I was, like, oh, whoops. CHUCKLES: OK, better get in there. Whoops. (CURIOUS MUSIC) You just gotta obey. - (PLAYS JOYFUL TUNE) Is he coming in? (INDISTINCT RESPONSE) No. Tsk. He's excited. - (CHUCKLES) - Just as well this wasn't his funeral. He'd be late. So half an hour later, 2.30, and we decide to start with Tamale and sing him Happy Birthday. - ALL SING: # Happy Birthday to you. - Tahu, rua, toru, wha. - ALL: Hi aue hi. - Tamale is like a little brother to me. Because he's the baby, I do tend to be a little bit overprotective over tamale. And because he's Tongan. There's a saying in Tongan ` (SPEAKS TONGAN) - Yay. Salad. I shouldn't even be eating this. But you know what? It's my birthday. - Happy birthday, Tamale. (ANGELIC MUSIC) (PERSON WEEPS) - My love. - Today we have Mrs Simoe Solomona, who was 86 years old, who died from dementia and frailty. - WEEPS: I miss you, Mama. I am so sad. I miss you. - GENTLY: She's happy to be home. - Yeah, yeah. - Oh, Mama. - Simoe has been repatriated back from Brisbane after living with her children for a few years, and is coming back to be laid to rest with her husband in Waikumete. - You're home now. - Yeah. - You look beautiful. You're home, Mama. (WEEPS) You fulfilled your dream. - Auntie Liga, being the eldest daughter, she has nursed Auntie ever since she's been unwell in Brisbane, as well as Auntie Bubba. They have been looking after her and having turns, and now auntie is gone, it is quite hard to go on with life, not having her around. But the peace for my family is that they've fulfilled my auntie's wish and bought her home. - (WEEPS) - Don't worry. You got heaps of grandchildren that resemble your mum. Mrs Simoe is a close auntie of mine, and we were raised with her children in Grey Lynn. So I'm very honoured that I am looking after my auntie, who is the matriarch of our family. - In the tin. - She would have heaps of broches. - Yes. - Yeah. - I was going, Oh, wow. Not one but two. Thank you. Must be for you and Liga, eh. - Yeah. - So, Auntie Simoe is in a white beautiful dress. That is new life for us. And it's just traditional that our elderly do get dressed in white. Yep. There you go, Auntie. Auntie's casket has been selected by the family, and it is in a beautiful white-gold cross American casket. It does have prayer hands and crosses ` symbolises my auntie and her husband's life was the church. And I think it's very appropriate that she looks like a queen being placed in there. She's more centred now. (POIGNANT MUSIC) Auntie's family service has been placed here at our funeral home, Onehunga. We are expecting a big crowd, given that Auntie Simoe is an original of Grey Lynn. So we're expecting a massive crowd. Obviously, Auntie's children and grandchildren are ex-rugby-league players who have played for our country, New Zealand, as well as NRL teams. So we're expecting quite a vibrant crowd, and it is turning out to be full, and it hasn't even reached 6 o'clock yet. - There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last. VOICE TREMBLES: But a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise. - She loved her family, and she loved God. And she prioritised those two things over everything in her life. I wanna honour my grandmother. I wanna say I love you, Nana. VOICE TREMBLES: I'm gonna miss you. - There are only about eight of us girls and about 30 boys. So after all the many grandsons got married, she came to me and said, 'Moe, my dream before I go to heaven is to see one of my granddaughters get married.' So thankfully, Rae got married in Samoa. (CHUCKLES) (LAUGHTER) And Layla got married in Townsville. Yeah. So sorry, Nana. I'm still praying for our (SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY) to come one day. (LAUGHTER) On days like this, and at loads of funerals, I always hear people say, I hope I make you proud one day. But, Nana, I know I made you proud when I led the family devotions, when I did your family tribute for your 80th birthday, and when I walked across that stage and graduated. You did not have to speak, but the tears in your eyes and the smile said it all. (LOVED ONES SING POIGNANT SAMOAN SONG) (PERSON WEEPS, SNIFFLES) - Today is Auntie's funeral service. (PERSON WEEPS) You're all right, Liga. I've arrived in Grey Lynn. It's going to be a memorable farewell, given that she has multiple grandchildren and great-grandchildren as well. And the feeling is quite emotional, because this is really the last time they're ever gonna see Nana. - WEEPS: Mum, I love you. I love you. - OK. - WEEPS, SNIFFLES: Thank you for everything, Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. - Liga. Liga. - Auntie looks amazing, and I know that she's ready to go to her church one last time. And she's already with my uncle and all those that we have loved and gone before us. - You got her, boss? - Yeah, bro. - Lift this up. - Malo le soifua, bro. - Malo. Malo. - We'll be taking Auntie Simoe back to our church ` PIC Newton in K Rd. There we'll have a two-hour service, and then following the service, we'll be taking her to be reunited with my uncle up in Waikumete Cemetery. - Queen of Grey Lynn. - Nana. (MOTORCYCLE MOTORS REV) - Church is quite full, and there's no surprises why. There are a lot of people there again, from different denominations, different backgrounds. And this is all because of Auntie's children and her work. Very well-loved community family. Basically left the home open for anyone and everyone, and they're all there to pay respects to her today. Wallace, hold in the middle of the bracket, babe. Yeah. (MOVING STRING MUSIC) Auntie was a person that didn't skite about her children being rugby league stars, or her grandchildren. She taught them how to be humble, and that's one thing that stands out for a lot of people who are talking to me about the service, about her humbleness. - Today is a happy day, where we're gonna celebrate our queen's life. Yes? So let's all put our hands together. Let's clap for our queen. (APPLAUSE) Welcome home, Mama. This is where you wanted to be. This is your heart, and this is your home, PIC Newton, who mama loved and adored. So thank you. Thank you, family, for reopening your doors for us to come and bring our mum to enjoy her last service for those who she loves. - We arrived at Waikumete Cemetery. We have the granddaughters who are going to carry from the hearse to a certain area before the grave. The grandsons will make themselves available halfway so that the granddaughters can hand over. We are just about to take the sticks away to lay her down, with her grandsons, and we've got a few voices telling them to go forward, go back. - Down, down. - But my nephews and nieces know that when I give instructions, that they're just listening to one voice. Nice and slow, boys. Everyone is very emotional at this time because she's being laid to rest with uncle, who passed away many years ago. And the sense of relief that she has been reunited with uncle and everything has gone perfect. Auntie Simoe, ia manuia lou malaga. (ANGELIC MUSIC) (SOFT JAZZ MUSIC) - I had heard that Nona's fridge that I purchased for her about two years ago had been broken, so I needed to get down and have a look and make an assessment. And upon entering her new office, which we newly refurbished for her, it was quite a pigsty in there. There was a few things broken in my eyes. I tried to make it so easy for her. Like, I have her own Dyson right behind her office chair. Some people are beautiful singers, and some people aren't. But, you know, we still love everyone. And so, some people are beautiful cleaners, and some people aren't. So you can't just stop loving someone cos they're not a good cleaner. So we just assist her and help clean her small 5m-squared office. Uh, that black roll, can you take that to Princes Street? So, the fridge was broken, and so I asked son to go down and get her another fridge. And all the rubbish, eh. Do you wanna take it to the dump or put it in the bin at the back. - He decided to get rid of it without telling me, which, I was really sad, because, you know, that's my attachment. - She is a beautiful funeral director. Families love her. And to be honest, a lot of the stuff in her office are gifts from families. So they come and bring her chocolates and cakes and Big Macs and KFCs. So we bought a bigger fridge for her, and I was hoping that when she gets her gifts of food, she can put them in the fridge and not leave them outside of the fridge. - When I came back and I saw that my new office had been cleaned, not that it was too dirty, not too bad, I was like, oh, OK, what's coming? What's following this? What does he want? You know, cos every time he does a spring-clean once in a blue moon, there's always something that Frances wants. Hello. (GASPS) Oh, 'shee-kers'. - No. I do it because she wants it, and she moans and moans until she gets it. And so, the best thing to do is just to give it and just, you know. It's a bit like my children at home. - What the hell? (LAUGHS) It's, like, massive. It's really big. I'm thinking, blue? (CHUCKLES) Massive. What? And he goes, 'Oh, the freezer part is for when we need ice blocks.' Oh, see. There's the word ` we, we, not me. - I thought, why have I bought her this? - Excuse me. - She's so` Look at this. All clothes were everywhere. It was quite an eyesore, and I just couldn't believe` - I'm an eyesore? - Oh my gosh. Today you were. - How was I your eyesore? - Well, it's not an eyesore any more. - Oh my gosh. Can you bring it down? This is, like, quite retro, eh? - Yeah. It's tall, thin and skinny like you. - Yes. Good description. Good wording. If you said something else, oh. Oh my gosh. I love it. - (CLEARS THROAT) - Oh my gosh. And when I retire, I can take it home with me. - And when are you planning on retiring? - Probably next year (!) - Well, do me a favour ` clean your office before you retire.